A love for All Seasons
by FaeDust
Summary: I Don't love you. I don't need anyone. Words meant to protect, words that broke all his ties to people he loved. Now he's a grown man trying to put his life back together. Are some wounds to deep to heal and can love truly weather all seasons.
1. Chapter 1: Misplaced Nobility

He felt like a great chasm of desolation was threatening to open up inside him. Flashes of memory and pictures of the past blinked and flitted in front of his eyes like maddening sprites bent on driving him to madness. He had only an hour before just broken up with his girlfriend of as little as a month. His heart felt as if he had just ended a marriage of thirty years.

When had he ever been so happy then when he was with Ginny. His heart had never felt so free, as if he had reached out to touch some beautiful distant summit and found he had suddenly grown wings. He flew with her, had been flying in a haven of ideal bliss for a month.

Dumbledore's death and one terrible soul shattering night had stripped him of his wings and sent him spinning, plummeting back to earth.

What was it like to have so many people you depended on leave you? First his parents, then Sirius, now Dumbledore? It made you damn sure you weren't going to loose anymore! He grit his teeth and balled his hands as he shoved more of his clothing into his trunks. An air of somber depression surrounding the castle. The students of Hogwarts had suddenly found their stability gone, that nothing in life was permanent. If anything had seemed permanent and dependable it had been their headmaster.

No longer.

Harry Potter had come to his decision the night before. He wasn't going to loose one more person that mattered to him, he was not going to let Voldemort harm the people he loved. He wasn't strong enough to protect them, so that meant he had to remove them from danger. They wouldn't want to leave, they were true friends and true friends wouldn't let him go alone.

He had very few choices, he knew that but it didn't mean it wouldn't hurt him.

He slammed his trunks shut and began to haul them out of the room. As he clattered down the boys dormitory steps into the common room he wasn't surprised a bit to see Hermione, Ginny and Ron waiting for him on a couch nearest the door. When he entered all three stood up at once.

"Harry, Ginny says you've broken things off with her I know you're worried about…" Ron began, Ginny put a hand on his arm and shook her head.

"Ron forget about that, I understand." She tried to explain but Ron shook her hand away and narrowed his eyes at Harry.

"No it's not ok at all. Ginny feels a lot for you mate were you just stringing her along then?" He demanded of him harshly. Harry saw Ginny turn pink as she glared at her brother. Hermione rolled her eyes heavenward.

"If you believe that for one moment Ron you're completely blind. Voldemort will do anything to hurt Harry as long as the two of them are together she's a target he's just trying to protect her." She admonished him, she looked to Harry as if looking for his agreement.

Harry watched their interaction with growing trepidation. Where was he going to find the strength or the cruelty to do what he had to do. As Ron and Hermione began to argue back and forth Ginny was looking at him strangely. Reading his face as he knew only she could, she took a in a sharp breath as if instinctively she could sense the worst coming.

_I'm sorry guys I'm so sorry. _

"Will you guys stop arguing! You're always snipping at each other like a pack of wild cats and I'm bloody tired of it! I came to tell you that I'm leaving." His shout interrupted their banter like a gunshot in a graveyard.

Ron and Hermione fell into shocked silence. Hermione was the first to recover, " We know that Harry. We're all going home Harry summers nearly here and with Dumbledore gone their sending us _all_ home." She said.

Harry shook his head, "No I'm not going back to the Dursleys. I'm _Never_! Never going back there!" He meant every word! He was never stepping another foot in that mockery of a home every again. The Weasleys, these people in front of him…_ they _were his home. He would do anything to protect them. Even hurt them.

"Do you want to come home with me then mate? You know Mum and Dad love having you." Ron offered unsurely. Their was something dreadfully wrong with Harry. He could feel it like a mist clinging to him, he was unsure of where he stood and it showed in the tremor in his voice.

Harry shook his head slowly. "No. I'm finishing this, doing what I have to do. He's done the unforgivable for the last time! I'm the only one who can stop him and I wont wait till he kills someone else to do it!"

Ron and Hermione's eyes locked and he knew they understood, he could tell they were gathering their courage and making the decision that even if it meant they might die, where he went they would follow.

God how he loved them for that.

There was no way he could let them.

"Then we better go pack as well. Are you sure now is the right time Harry?" Hermione asked him.

You can do it, all you have to do is tear out your own heart. How hard can that be? Ginny was the only one who noticed his sad and utterly bitter smile.

"You don't want us to come with do you Harry." She spoke quietly, he could see a sheen of wetness gathering in her eyes.

The first wave of soul shattering pain hit him. He shook his head.

"HARRY! But you need us!" Ron and Hermione instantly protested.

"That's where you're wrong. I don't need any of you."

A person who could utter such a lie should have their tongue ripped from their mouth. It was an abomination of the very idea of truth.

"How can you say that!" Ron blustered,

"Harry that's afoul!" Hermione gapped.

He couldn't handle this one more moment, he wanted it over and done with. If he had to rip his heart out better to rip it out in one quick thrust.

"Look! Who is it that found the stone? Who rescued Ginny and defeated that Voldemort? Who had to face him in that graveyard? It was me! I don't need you, I never have. You'd all just be in my way! Ron your always blundering about and you couldn't fight your way out of a paper bag! Hermione you think you know everything but your just a silly little girl! And Ginny…"  
His voice faltered when he saw the emotion welling in her eyes. Instead of cringing and crying as Hermione had begun to do, or staring at him like he'd shot her like Ron was, she just watched him. Her eyes shining with tears, her arms folded across her chest waiting for him to end it all. Bravely waiting for him to say the words that would shatter what they had shared.

"..I just don't need you." He finished lamely.

Hermione shuddered and with a sob turned away and strode quickly from the room. Ron glared at him and spit out. "You know what Harry, I wouldn't have believed it of you. I had actually convinced myself you weren't a glory seeking pratt!" He went to grab Ginny's arm and haul her from the room but she shrugged him off. With a cry of exasperation he stormed off.

The two of them stood their staring at each other, he wanted to say he was sorry. He wanted to beg her for her forgiveness. He wanted to throw himself in her arms and just breath in the scent that was her and feel all that he had felt in the last month.

He couldn't. Not if he loved her.

"I hope Harry that you really don't mean those things. Part of me hopes that your doing this out of some misguided attempt to drive us away. Tell me that's it…please." She whispered softly.

He could confess, he could say it had all been lies. He could cry and she would hold him and he wouldn't feel so terribly shattered.

No. Then he'd be right back where he started, she and the others would still insist on coming with him in the end. They just didn't have it in them to let him go alone. Not unless he drove them away.

He steeled himself and said the cruelest words he could think of.

"Please Don't Ginny. Look it was fun it really was. Loads better then Chang or any other girl I've been with. I tried to let you off easy all that stuff about Voldemort and protecting you but you kept on insisting. It's just done, we're done. If you want me to be brutally honest I'm just bored with it ok. It doesn't matter to me."

He wished some one would kill him. At that moment when she balled her fist and turned away from him he believed he deserved it. To his surprise instead of leaving in tears as Hermione had done she whirled around a blaze of anger in her eyes.

"you know what Harry? I'm not stupid! I can see right through you I'm not angry about the load of rubbish you just spouted or the fact that you must think I have a brain the size of a needle. I'm angry because you're a coward! Your going to give up without even trying! Your giving up on your two best friends without giving them the chance to be your friends! Your giving up on me, on us because you're scared!" She said with passion.

He made himself shrug. "if it helps your pride to think so, go ahead and think that."

With a cry of frustration and what sounded suspiciously like tears she turned away in a whirl of robes and strode from the room with angry dignity. When she reached the door however she stopped turn back to say softly, "I hope you don't regret this too much one day Harry. I hope you can be happy alone." Then she disappeared through the portrait hole and was gone.

Harry felt his knees quake and he slowly slid to the floor. He would not cry…he would not cry.

He had done what he had to do, and his work wasn't done. He had to finish the war Voldemort had started nearly seventeen years ago on an October night. He had done what was necessary to protect the people who mattered to him most.

He was used to making sacrifices, had made them many times before. Now he would never have to worry about making another one again.

No sacrifice would hurt as much as this one had.

He would be resilient, he would be strong. He would do what he had to do…He would not cry.

A single tear rolled off his cheek and splashed on the floor. It was all Harry James Potter would allow.

Authors note: Fini! Woosh that was kind of long for a prologue I know. Comments are seriously and wondrously adored.


	2. Chapter 2: The Fall of love

-1_…So Anyway Ron and I cant agree on a date for the wedding. I Swear to you Ginny, that man wouldn't be able to decide to breathe if nature didn't do it for him! He has come up with a number of excuse as to why we have to postpone it again and again. I would almost question whether he is getting cold feet if it weren't for the way he looks at me and the way he kisses me like I'm the greatest gift on earth. A woman could get spoiled on such attention. As well you know, how is Davey these days has his pleas for marriage and a house full of little rug rats convinced you, you better snap him up before someone else does?…_

Ginny sighed and put down the letter she was reading. Hermione meant well she was sure it was just with her brothers upcoming marriage; that is if he got around to setting a date for it; she found herself sinking into a type of melancholy.

And it really was rather ridiculous! She was twenty two hardly an old maid with plenty of time to find her Mr. Right. In fact she had a wonderful boyfriend/friend who kept her company. David or Davey Langdon worked with her at St. Mungo's and made it no secrete he was in love with her and thought they made a stunning pair.

Everyone else did that was for sure, her father was always urging her to settle down saying he wanted his baby girl to be happy. Her sisters-in-law seemed so happy and blissful with their husbands and families that she tried really hard to believe it.

She tried to picture being Davey's wife, and she could very well picture a small little white house with a picket fence and a little boy running with a dog or two in the yard. Davey was a handsome man with coal black hair and caring blue eyes, the little boy would have a mop of black curls on his head and chubby little legs as he ran after a dog that in her mind often switched from small to large.

Then she encountered a problem. Because every time she walked up the drive of that little white house and called out to the little boy he turned to face her with sparkling green eyes and the man behind him was _not_ Davey.

She gave up on the image, on the fantasy of marrying Davey. She just couldn't picture it, it had been like this since she was a small girl of ten and got her first glimpse of sparkling emerald eyes and raven hair that grew every which way. When she closed her eyes and imagined the family she hoped and desired for _he_ would always be there.

The name Harry was like poison in her family these days. She had meant to be strong about it, the brazen Amazon who didn't need a man to complete her. She had succeeded for a while, in the very least she had been able to face Harry's soul shattering words and denial of the love they shared with dignity and grace. It hadn't lasted to long, it lasted till she got of the train and saw her parents waiting for her, saw Fleur and Bill and remembered that even in the face of danger and uncertainty their love had persevered.

Hers sure hadn't, Harry had backed out on her without a second thought.

She had burst into tears much to her baffled parents surprise. Her mother had hugged her to her chest and asked in confusion, "Ginny, is this about the Headmaster? There there dear he would not want you to cry." When Ginny had just cried harder she looked around as if asking for help. It was then she noticed that Harry wasn't present. "Where's Harry?"

Ron had let out an angry growl and looked mad enough to hit something as he bit out, "In a ditch I hope!"

Hermione had paled and scowled at him reproachfully, she had stiffened in her mothers arms the thought that Harry might very well have met some dire fate making her body run cold.

Fearing for him had been worse then all the cold nights of crying herself to sleep, trying to hide her sorry state from her family and the emptiness. Fearing that any morning now she would read the morning paper and find out that he had died wore on her, it bleached all color and happiness from her life.

When a year later she woke to the sound of jubilant cheers and fireworks in the sky she knew Harry had managed to do it she sank to her knees on the floor of Hogwarts and wept.

Ginny placed Hermione's letter in her jacket pocket and prepared to leave the busy coffe house where she had been taking her lunch break. Her problem was she dwelled on Harry too much. Hadn't she suffered enough heartbreak at his hands? After defeating the dark lord he had come back to finish his seventh year of schooling. Ron and Hermione had graduated the year before of course but since Harry had been away he was a year behind.

For the first time in their lives Ginny and Harry found themselves in the same year. Ginny had not been able to fight back the excitement, the hope brewing in her center as she counted down the days till school started.

Those hopes had been dashed as she pulled her trunks across the platform and spotted him. The boy she remembered was gone.

He was only eighteen and by rights shouldn't there be some youthful idealism in those eyes. Some sparkle of mischief and purpose and a zest for life present in all young? Where was the idealistic if merry glint of youthful life that she remembered?

Where was _her_ Harry?

The man standing on the platform staring at the Hogwarts express with a crowd of people gathering around him was not the boy she knew. He was a stranger to her, so much so that she almost doubted that it had been him at all.

He had the same hair, hair as black as night that refused to be tamed, hair she had run her fingers through and delighted in it's feel. The same general height maybe an inch or to taller teenage boys did tend to grow like weeds after all. He had the same build, if not the tallest man in the world he did have a certain type of grace to his form that attracted the eye and a lean type of strength that rather then making one think of brick walls and heavy muscled things made you think of panthers and jungle cats.

It was the face then, it had the same angles and planes the same curves and sharp edges she remembered. Still something had changed in his face something vital to who she remembered him to be.

The eyes are the window to the soul, her mother had once told her. If that was so then Harry's soul was as craven and empty as Ron insisted it was. Those eyes were the coldest most chillingly empty things she had ever seen in her seventeen years. When she approached him with a hopeful smile on her face and gladness to see him alive and well those eyes had turned on her to chill her to the bone.

The life had left eyes that had once looked on her with love and hope. The eyes of someone dead were on the face of a man yet living. She had wanted to weep for him right then in there. Instead she had reached for his hand and asked him the question that centered most in her thoughts.

"Harry are you ok?"

What had happened to him? What had he seen that would make him so soulless. Did he still love her? She had only half believed all those words he had spoken to her, some secrete part of her had still hoped he had only done it in some foolish quest for nobility. Wouldn't that be just like him, to drive her away to protect her. If that was so then the danger was over, all he had to do was admit what he had done and admit he loved her and she would have jumped into his arms…

The dead cant love.

The boy she knew had died on some foreign battlefield fighting against a man wholly evil. Harry had gazed at her with those cold sightless eyes; they had actually sparked in anger at her words.

"Alright how can I possibly be alright?" He had repeated her question with a harsh edge to his voice like she had committed some crime in even asking. She had flinched as if he had struck her, in truth it felt as if he had.

She had felt Ron's steadying hand on her shoulder even before she heard his angry greeting. "So your alive are you? A pity that."

The crowd around them had gasped and looked on her brother with dislike. Harry was a national hero, the savior of the world. Ron was practically spiting on his face, and they of course thought this in the worst of tastes.

Harry had only shrugged his shoulders and responded in the driest blandest voice she had ever heard on a living person. "If breathing qualifies as being alive."

Ron had perceived this as an insult, Ginny took it for what it was. Harry didn't just look dead, he felt dead. Ginny had shivered again wondering what had happened to him that he would return like this. Ron hadn't allowed her to ask he had dragged her away from Harry muttering obsenities about Harrys character under his breath. Hermione had bitten her lip and glanced back at Harry with sorrow.

Ron had glared at her as if he could tell she wanted to go and talk to Harry, Hermione had blushed given Ginny a hasty hug as she boarded the train and left with Ron.

Never speaking a word to Harry. Ginny had sat in her Compartment determined that she wouldn't let her brothers resentment get in the way of reaching Harry. He was obviously a mess, obviously in pain and in obvious need of love. She loved him, had always loved him. Could love defeat the horror she had just glimpsed in his emerald eyes?

Her mother had once told her that Love weathered all seasons. Love blossomed and bloomed like the spring something fresh and new. It grew bold and passionate in the summer something wild heady and free. But it also had to face the fall, when disillusionment sank in and youthful ideals were stripped away. When lovers had to wake up from the daze of new love and face the world around them and all its stumbling blocks.

Love had to face the cruel taunting cold of winter. Real love could face even the harshest of blizzards and still come through. True love wasn't just spring, or summer. Love was for all seasons.

She would not let the cold winter of Harry's eyes break their love.

Ginny left the coffee house and into the summer heat remembering her youthful foolishness. As she walked down the streets of London back to her work she thought on how hopelessly blind she had been. And how discovering that Harry had trully meant it when he said that he didn't love her, that she had been "_fun while it lasted"_ was all truth. That all the dreams she had built up in her heart were just that…dreams.

Harry had spent his belated seventh year doing one of three things. Studying, flying, and she suspected drinking. The seventh years of Hogwarts learned fast not to talk to Harry before noon because in the morning his temper was shorter then a butterflies lifespan compared to that of trees.

His eyes were red rimmed bleary and utterly soulless, he looked like a man with the worlds worst hangover to be short and the professors had looked the other way. Harry was an authority unto himself, the most popular of students which was nothing new. His hero status had blossomed into almost obsessive fame.

No one had the courage to tell him he was destroying himself, he had saved them they figured. Let the man do what he wanted with his life, he deserved that much respect.

Well he did, but not at the extent of his health. Ginny had followed him one night to see if her suspicions were correct, he treated her like a fly on the wall during the day either ignoring her or just watching her talk with those glacial eyes.

She had found him on the balcony of the Astronomy tower, the one used for Divination O.W.L.S when they needed to chart the stars. He had a bottle of whisky in one hand and several other empty bottles were strewn on the balcony walk. She had found him cloakless his shirt unbuttoned; walking the railing of the tower balcony.

His hair had blown away from his face in the night wind and he had tossed back his head and taken a deep draw from the bottle.

He had been weeping.

And swaying, her heart had leapt in her throat but she was afraid to call out to him for fear it would startle him and he would fall. It had stayed there beating a rhythm of absolute fear and panic as he stared at the ground in front of him.

The contemplation of that fall…she knew he was indeed thinking just that. Thinking about throwing his life on the rocks below. Ending whatever torment he was suffering.

Her legs had trembled and given out beneath her and she had sunken to the ground tears of fright running down her cheeks.

He had finally noticed her then. He had stared at her eyes unchanging in their death. He had thrown back his head and laughed like a man gone mad. Then he had hopped off the balcony back into the tower walk way.

"The fall's too short." He had said in contempt.

Too short? They were at least a hundred feet up!

"Harry what happened to you? Please talk to me." She had begged him, reaching out a hand to grasp at his.

At her touch he snarled and jerked away as if he couldn't stand the feel of their skin touching. "Leave me alone! Don't you get it? I don't want you! I don't want anyone! I don't need anyone! Just leave me alone quite following me around like some kind of desperate puppy!"

Harry had the power to smash her heart into thousands of pieces, she had discovered it that night. He had the power to make her weak and empty, as a strong minded woman that was just not to be born. She didn't need any man to complete her, and no man was going to treat her like Harry did and watch her fall apart. She had responded with all the pride and anger she could muster.

" I wanted to see if you were alright. I'm sorry I ever cared about you. I'm sorry I wasted all this time waiting for you."

That had been the end of them, of her girlhood. Of any youthful idealistic thoughts she had on love or its seasons or its strength. Men were fickle, didn't know what they wanted and could take a woman's heart and crush it with barely a thought.

There were a few good ones, the ones with mothers and sisters to make sure they grew up into good men. Her mother would have a thing or two to say to any son of hers who treated a woman like _some_ men did. Davey had a wonderful mother and an older sister that had whipped him into shape. Her own brothers were wonderful men.

She thought of Hermione's letter and her growing frustration with Ron dragging his feet and smiled. They were still men.

"Miss can I have some more relief potion, my leg aches like I lost it!" the school aged young man in the infirmary bed asked of her. She looked at her list of patients and found his name on the list. He had been given a pain relief potion only an hour before. She frowned slightly, some hexes left wounds and then sank into the system to come back later undetected.

She gave him a comforting smile and nodded, "Sure thing Tomas you I bet that still hurts. _Legitos protos _is a nasty hex. I bet it hurts a little." 

From his records Ginny knew Tomas was a sixth year at Hogwarts, she smiled fondly at him. Most of her memories of her school days were fond if somewhat tainted by a certain _Harry Potter_. Tomas blushed a little and ducked his head letting his brown hair fall in front of his eyes hiding his face.

She was used to one of two reactions from her single male patients. If they were under eighteen they were usually shy and thought she didn't notice the youthful adoration in their eyes when her back was turned.

If they were older then eighteen they were flirtatious and gave her glances that said all to clear they were wondering if she was still available. The older men she tended to ignore, not one of them had yet stirred anything even remotely special in her. The Boyhood crushes amused her.

She wasn't vain but she wasn't stupid either, she knew she was an attractive woman and that men looked at her. Davey informed her all the time she was a beautiful woman and she well remembered discovering that very truth when she was fourteen. Although her first boyfriend had if she was honest been more an attempt of getting Harry's attention than anything else.

_Stop dwelling on him. He probably doesn't even think about you! He's at this very moment probably in the arms of some wealthy blonde super snob. The papers are always highlighting his latest conquest. The come and go in the droves! You were just one on a very very long list, so just Stop it! _ She rebuked herself internally.

"I'll go and see if the brewer has any on hand don't exert too much pressure on your legs." She advised the young man with a warm smile as she left his numbered room. She checked off his name on her scrolls and lists of patients to see to day. She enjoyed being a medi-witch. Enjoyed her colleges, enjoyed her patients.

She enjoyed her life but she felt restless, she wanted what her brothers had, what her mother had. What Hermione had found and was anticipating for in Ron. She wanted a man that loved her and a family of her own. Didn't everywoman in some secrete part of her want that?

Davey was offering it, and he wouldn't be the only one. Why didn't she put aside her pride and just take it. _Why are you still holding on to that absolute git when there's a perfectly good man wanting to marry you. Why are you so centered on a man who cares more about what he's pouring down his throat then living?_

Maybe it went back to the love of seasons. Her love must be true love because this was definitely winter and it seemed as if her foolish, foolish heart was determined to persevere through it. _Yeah well his isn't so just move on, girl you are so much stronger then this!_

"There you are Ginny, Rachel told me you got back from lunch you could have knocked on my door I would have gone with you." Davey's voice broke her thoughts. She turned and gave him a somewhat stiff smile.

With his perfectly pressed robes, combed hair and neat as a pin appearance he was as different from Harry, or any male in her family as could be. Except Percy, actually if she thought on it the two men were a lot alike. Both concerned with property to an almost annoying extent. Both a little arbitrary when it came to women.

Oh good lord she was actually considering Marrying _Percy!_ What had happened to her.

-----change of view----

"I want to thank you Remus, you don't have any idea how much you and Tonks have done for me. Putting up with me…well if I were you I probably would have killed me and put me out of my misery." Harry laughed.

Laughter still felt a bit like a novelty, it seemed like he hadn't laughed in years. It felt rusty rumbling in his chest like an unused organ. He owed his ability to feel to the man and woman before him. Remus Lupin and, he daren't utter her first name for she hated it more then the thought of a slow painful death, Tonks.

Remus had given him a place to stay after graduation and had been extremely troubled by his behavior to say the least. He hadn't wanted to press knowing very well Harry must have suffered something terrible to act the way he did thinking that Harry had just needed time to heal. He owed Harry that in the very least.

Harry thought back to the year of loosing himself in drink, women, and dare devil acts that only an insane man would attempt and shuddered.

He had wanted to die, he understood that now. That's why he climbed the tops of trees to jump into water without checking it's depth, that's why he flew at break neck speed uncaring if he collided with something or if the force of a thunderstorm would knock away his broom from beneath him.

The pain of being alive had swallowed him whole. He had felt beyond redemption, beyond life. Ginny had tried to reach him with love and he had snapped at her like a caged tiger.

What he had needed was a cold hard smack in the face. Which after a year of watching and reading about Harry's behavior, Remus had supplied in full measure. He had begun a hard and painful road of sobering up a young man who didn't feel he had the right to live and dowsed his hurt with liquor.

He had thrown out the bottles hidden in his room, and charmed him so that the taste of alcohol would make him so terribly ill taking even a swallow was beyond him.

Harry had not been as appreciative of his efforts then as he was now. He had in fact exhausted his vocabulary of swear words. Remus had endured everyone with a tight lipped smile and simply replied.

"I love Harry, when this is over you'll remember what that is."

Tonks had supplied a womanly big sisterly type of loving that Remus could. Cleaning up his messes and telling him funny stories as he went through an although mild still exceedingly uncomfortable withdrawal.

She bandaged and brewed healing potions when he came home bleeding and broken from some death defying act that frightened anyone near him. When he snarled obscenities at and about her husband she would grin and say. "I sometimes agree he's as stubborn as a mule. Then again so are you."

When he had begged and pleaded for her to tell him the spell Remus had placed on him, she lovingly refused. When he threatened to leave she said he couldn't because he had no where else to go.

Without drink to numb the pain, it seemed for a while the pain and the memories just got worse. The turning point had been the day he went to the library determined to find the name of the spell that Remus had cast on him and to out do it. Seven hours of pouring through books and he had found it. He had reversed it and went out to drink himself into oblivion with a desperate kind of triumph.

He had stumbled back home to collapse on the floor. He had woken up tucked in his bed with his head pounding in misery his soul just as torn as ever and couldn't wait to be numb to it all again. He had slipped from his bed aware he had slept the day away and that it was storming outside. He was headed for the door when he heard Remus and Tonks in the master bedroom.

Remus had been crying.

"I just don't know what to do, he wont talk to anyone about what happened! He spends all his time trying to break his neck or drown himself in booze! His parents must be turning over in their graves. I've tried everything but he…"

He had moved away from their door, his words like a blunt mace to his chest. On that stormy night he realized he had given up on everything that mattered to him, and pushed away all those who loved him. As he had stood on the roof top of their little house knowing the fall although a short one was enough to end his sorry existence he had come face to face with the fact that because of his actions if he jumped now no one would mourn him.

He had stood there shattered and broken and realized that whether he lived or died no one would care. If he jumped his life would have counted for nothing, would be a story people looked back on and shook their heads at. Nothing but a blip in history, one more fallen hero for the textbooks.

He could have had the woman he loved above all others, he could still have friends who cared enough for him that they would risk their own lives to follow him wherever he was called to go. He could have mattered to someone.

He had been so afraid of loosing one of them that he had pushed and pushed until he had lost _all _of them.

If he jumped now it would change nothing.

He flew off of the roof and walked back into the house. He wasn't dead he would not be _dead_. He had horrible memories and the nightmares would probably never leave him, but that did not mean he had to waste the rest of his life. He had not defeated Voldemort's rein of darkness and tyranny over his life the night he killed the man.

The night he stood on the edge of death and endless despair and rediscovered the strength he had lost was the true victory.

"I told you, you don't need to thank me. It would be my hope if I ever got that bent out of shape some one would love me enough to give me a good hard shake." Remus laughed with him.

Harry felt a wave of love for this man wash through him and fought back a wave of tears. He had been so utterly and completely stupid for years. The couple years had been spent rebuilding his life and trying to destroy the image of a Rake he had created. He had gotten a job and kept it, now that he was clear eyed his old dream of being an Auror became a reality. He had been a sober and dedicated man for four years now.

At Twenty three Harry Potter had just about everything, a fortune, fame, medals of honor and two very wonderful friends. But when he had finally finished moving into his new apartment and unpacked a photo album he hadn't touched in years he realized what he missed and regretted loosing the most.

He had burned so many bridges in an effort to save the people in these photo's. It was about time he rebuilt them.

Deep in his heart he feared that wasn't possible.

Still he had to try.


	3. Chapter 3: The Eve of Broken Glass

Seamus Finnigan liked his life he thought it was going well if anyone asked him. The Pot of Gold was his pride and after two hard years of labor and three more of sheer business wheedling and begging the Tavern was the go to place in London. Dinner music Dancing, even a bar for those who just wanted a quick drink and good chatter. The Pot of Gold was the place you took your girlfriend for her birthday, your sweetheart for dinner your brothers to taste their first Fire whiskey or a Mate to get completely smashed after a bad break up.

It was neither too fancy nor too trashy, it had class but with enough free spirit that it wasn't too stuffy for the poorer class. It resembled Seamus himself. Neither rich nor poor Classy nor Trashy. It was fun and it was a happy place.

And it was his.

And it was closed but he was not surprised when the door opened and the bell jingled signaling that some one had entered his establishment. He looked up from his clip board and waved away the waiter who approached him with a question.

"the white linen cloths" He hissed distractedly already knowing the question on his hired helpers tongue. He grinned boyishly as Dean Tomas came traipsing into his tavern. The dark skinned man had been his best friend since boyhood and he alone other then a few others could traipse in and out of Pot Of Gold without a by your lieve.

Dean had gone onto become an Auror and was a fairly busy man but he always made a point to stop in for a drink after closing. Seamus inwraped him in a bear hug each playfully trying to see how hard the other could pound on the others back.

After he was sure Dean had knocked his lung loose Seamus stepped back grinning from ear to ear.

"You're late Thomas I was just clearing out the dance area and putting up the art." Seamus laughed trying to appear scolding and failing miserably.

"Sorry, Seamus there was a rouge wizard up in Chutney and I got called in. Is this about the Weasley Bash tonight." Dean asked with an apologetic shrug sitting down on a bar stool as Seamus moved behind the counter.

He nodded pouring Dean his favorite drink, "What else Bill and Fleur's Seventh you know. They've rented out the place."

Dean nodded taking a sip, "Harry just got off as well should be heading back to his place." He remarked almost too casual.

Seamus halted his movements. Harry was a sticky subject, on one hand Harry had never done anything personally to hurt either of them. Seamus had watched along with all of his old friends as Harry fell apart inside and like many he had at one point tried to reach him but Harry had become unreachable. Four years ago Remus had finally snapped some sense and some life back into him and Harry had applied for Auror training. Needless to say he had gotten almost immediately accepted and Dean being an Auror and an old friend had been officially the first of Harry's old friends to welcome him back to sanity.

Well Seamus had nothing personal against Harry and he was just glad Harry wasn't drowning himself in booze or trying to contract every STD known to man anymore.

On the other hand, he was good friends with the Weasleys and Hermione and Harry had definitely done a lot to hurt them. His loyalties were split, he was Harry's friend but he knew better then to mix the two. He didn't mention the fact that he saw Harry on a regular basis, in fact he made it a point not to mention Harry at all. His name was like a loaded bomb in the Weasley household.

Dean knew this and Generally practiced the same method of dealing with the two sides, to have him Mention Harry right after mentioning the Weasley's boded ill for all involved.

"Oh Dean you didn't!" He threw down his dish towel staring in horror at his friend.

Dean had he not been so dark was sure to be turning red right about now. "Look Seamus he asked, We got to talking and drinking a few…oh not that much don't glare at me Finnigan Harry's still Sober…and he said he missed the old days and well…I miss them too. I miss them a lot, you and I both know things shouldn't be like this!"

Seamus sighed, "Yeah Ron and Hermione should have married ages ago and Ginny and Harry should have Married with them they should have a couple kids right now. They should at least be able to stand the sight of each other. In some school girls fantasy maybe but real life didn't turn out like that. Ginny is practically engaged to Davey, and Isn't he involved?"

Dean shook his head, "They broke things off after he sobered up I don't think he even remembers dating her. Harry hasn't dated anyone since then he's married to his job and tied to his nightmares."

Seamus frowned, "What do you mean tied to his nightmares."

Dean shivered as if a chill had gone down his spine taking another swallow of his drink. "I mean that at night Harry dreams and let me tell you mate whatever he lived through I don't blame him for swimming to the bottom of a whisky barrel I didn't even get the whole picture and he had me wanting a strong drink."

Seamus's face fell, "He isn't healing then?" He asked forlornly feeling a flash of pain for his friend.

Dean shook his head, "Oh he's healed a whole lot I'd say. But he'll never be completely healed without them, and her and you know it Seamus."

Seamus sighed, he did know it. Harry would always bear scars and they were scars that he couldn't bear alone. Ron and Hermione had been too close, had meant to much for him not to try and resolve the hurt he had caused. As for Ginny, love didn't just go away true love never fades. It could get stomped on beaten battered and broken but never did it just simply die of it's own accord. Seamus would bet his arm that Harry still loved Ginny. For a while he had been incapable of life nevertheless love. Now he was but he had already lost it.

Seamus sighed, damn him but he couldn't fault Harry. In a way this was what he had hoped for. He also dreaded it, Harry could not simply waltze back into their hearts and their lives.

This was going to be long and messy and wasn't it a joy that he would get to witness the process!

"Is he going to crash my Party?"

Dean grinned apologetically. "More then likely Seamus I'd put away the china if I were you. The Weasleys aren't known for their easy temperament."

Seamus sighed and turned to bark at one of his table hoppers, "Hey Treven! Go easy on the glass!"

Harry had not been on this street in years, he knew it had only been seven years but those seven years felt like an entire lifetime. He had not known it was possible to miss a street corner so much but miss it he had Harry realized as he wandered down the streets of Diagon Alley.

It was mid summer and most of the shop doors stood open in the hopes of letting in a breeze. Children darted in and out of doorways with shrieks of laughter or frustration. Haggard and Frazzled looking witches dragged protesting children behind them. Some older children were trying to look bored by all the hustle and bustle glancing furtively at each other making sure their practiced boredom was noticed by their friends.

Harry smiled, they may not be in uniform but those second years were trying desperately to prove they were no longer first years and of course that meant that they were just a small leap to adulthood.

The boredom left the young teen's faces as he passed by them, he had dressed as inconspicuously as possible. His slacks were black but care worn a small splattering of paint on the cuffs. His shirt clung to his frame but was beginning to be thin in places. His hair, well he had given up hope on taming his hair years ago.

All in all Harry looked nothing like the sodden glitzy playboy who had graced the cover of every gossip rag for two years after his graduation. He should have known he didn't need to be wearing expensive clothing, didn't need some blonde leggy female who's name he wouldn't remember nor truly cared to remember the next morning, for people to recognized him.

All he needed was one Jagged lightning scar to grace his forehead and the whispers and giggles would follow him for the rest of his days.

"It's Harry Potter! I saw the scar!"

"Harry Potter are you sure, move let me see!"

"Would he sign my broom do you think?"

"Isn't he just a dish, my sister Beatrice says he's engaged to Rachel Evans…"

"No it was Hailey Whickers…"

"No it was…"

Harry tuned them out fighting back a sigh. Had he really dated someone with the last name Evans? Not that it really mattered any but it was too close to comfort for any sane person to consider. Not that he had been sane for those two years, he neither remembered nor particularly cared who Rachel Evans was.

Or Hailey, or Jessica, or Ruth, or Martha, or Meagan, or Cailey…heavens Harry turned around to stare worriedly at the giggling girls. Had their been that many?

He shook his head and continued on down the street, nothing was going to get him down this afternoon. Looking at the shops he could not help but to remember summers at the Weasleys and a time when he was one of those kids Trailing after Mrs. Weasleys hem from store to store. He remembered being one of those awkward teenagers lounging against doorways hoping he looked unmoved and sophisticated and failing miserably.

Diagon Alley with it's fog of smells and din of noise was oddly like coming home all over again.

"WATCH IT! CLEAR OUT!" A voice bellowed from behind him, Harry reacted almost instinctively. Four years of being an Auror had taught him to watch his back if nothing else so as he leapt out of the way he barely saw the red headed missal streak past him to crash into a booth full of chattering things that looked like shriveled pumpkins with beady eyes.

The booths owner shrieked and watched in horror as his booth went toppling over and his merchandise rolled into the street a high pitched chattering sound accompanied the _things _escape. Harry got a good look at a wickedly chattering pumpkin as it rolled past and realized they weren't pumpkins at all. They were Ghoulkins, and the tricksters were out of season.

The deceiving looking ghouls opened mouths that seemed to appear out of no where to snap at the heals of passerby's and causing general mayhem. Harry rolled his eyes, for heavens sake they acted as if Death Eaters had invaded the streets instead of mere Ghoulkins.

Harry pulled out his wand and with a causal flick he said "Exacto Seprim." A green jet of mist shot out of his wand tip and misted around the ankles of the panicking pedestrians and wrapped around the Ghoulikins and the froze almost as if an artic blizzard had just come in. One froze in the midst of gnawing on the ankle of an older wizard who was beating at it with a cane.

"All fixed, no need to panic." Harry had to bite back laughter as the old man Harrumphed in indignation.

"I see nothing amusing about those little terrors! Keep your Merchandise in control!" He chastised the young seller with a boney finger. The young man looked no older then sixteen was wearing red robes with three intertwined w's. Harry's eyes fixated on that badge he felt an odd sort of something mixing in his stomach.

He glanced up to the sign on the door and had to bite back laughter. He had not truly had much purpose in wandering down Diagon Alley other then to delay the inevitable. He knew today was the Anniversary of Bill and Fleur Weasley. The one night Harry was sure all the Weasley family would be in one place.

He had wanted to avoid the confrontation he knew his arrival would cause, he had not really even been minding where he was going but as long as their was blood flowing in his veins it seemed he would be lead to the Weasley's.

Weasley's Wizard Wheezes.

"It wasn't me sir it was the boy!" The seller was defending himself against the gathering crowds indignation.

The boy, In the midst of the excitement Harry had completely forgotten what had caused it a boy on broom whom could very well have injured himself.

Harry pushed his way passed the quarrelsome old wizard and the bemused clerk and began to throw aside wooden planks from the ruined booth.

Thin coltish legs appeared first and as Harry cleared more of the rubble aside he saw that the boy was far too young to have been flying a broom he looked no older then five his arms were pale and freckled and his hair was a fiery copper to rival that of a Weasley.

"Is he dead…."

"A boys just been killed."

Whispers of shock began to swirl amongst the gathering crowd. Harry raised a hand for silence and pressed a hand to the boys back feeling his chest rise and fall. There was a small gash on his forehead that was leaking blood but he otherwise appeared unharmed for his misadventure.

"He isn't dead, his head probably needs a little time to clear is all." Harry Reassured the panicking mothers gathered around clutching their own children to their sides. Harry expected a frantic woman to appear any moment now but no one moved to claim the boy. Harry glanced back down at him, who was he and what mother allowed their five year old to go joy riding on a broom?

"Is that really how it works Mr. Weasley?" The young witch leaned against the counter batting flaxen eyebrows up at his twin and George Weasley had to hide a snicker. The young woman looked as if she could care less how Fred and he had created "_Eversores_" She in fact looked far more interested in Fred himself.

"I can't give away trade secrets now can I?" Fred winked at her, handing her a bag in return for her money. The girl blushed and allowed her giggling friends to pull her away. George shook his head and arched an eyebrow in his brothers direction.

"Only married a year brother and already your eyes are wandering what will Angelina say." George sneered in his twins direction continuing to flick his wand and watching the shelves he was stacking stack themselves. Business was booming especially with the new _Eversores_ out, they were constantly having to restock their shelves.

"The same thing Katie will say when I tell her about those two twins that came in here yesterday." Fred returned just as flippantly.

George was about to flick a box at his twin when the fire place exploded in green flame and Fleur their sister by marriage came striding out of it.

Her normally elegant appearance was not in place today, her blue cloak was rumpled her hair was only half in a complicated design and her eyes were frantic.

"Fleur you're looking slightly less put together then usual don't you have the big anniversary dinner to get ready for?" Fred asked blinking in surprise.

Fleur barely spared his remark a moments thought her eyes darting franticly around the store. "Where iz Francis? Ave you seen him? I zent him ere to tell you zat Ginny ez going to be early an the next thing I know ez papa's broom is gone and so is ee."

Fleur had gotten much better with her French after seven years of marriage to their oldest brother Bill but when she was upset her speech could become rushed and garbled, she was clearly frantic now. George had to suppress a grin, Francis their oldest child of six was nothing like either of his parents much to Fleurs horror.

Frankie was a little boy after his favorite uncles heart, and poor Fleur had a hard time keeping up with him. He wasn't doing a good job of hiding his amusement because Flue was now glaring at him as if she wished he would go to the Devil.

"Don encourage em George! Oi he could ave killed himself somewhere!" She moaned putting her head in her hands.

"Calm down Fleur Frankie's got a good head on his shoulders I'm sure he's fine." Fred offered putting his arm around her in comfort.

Her glare swiveled to him, "E is ol of Six! E is a babe! An don call him that Orribel name. E is Francis not Frankie." Fleur insisted heatedly.

George was just going to point out that Frankie preferred that to his real name which he had a tendency to sock other little boys for using when a commotion outside on the streets drew all their eyes.

"What in the devil's going on outside?" Fred asked.

George stepped over to the window and had a chance to see a Ghoulikin chase a hapless young witch down the street snapping at her heels.

George burst into laughter, "It looks as if Conner spilled the Ghoulikins. It's given our patrons quite a scare come look."

Fred grimaced, "It's not all that funny mate when we have to round them up. Do you know how much profit we just lost?"

George waved his hand in dismissal the shop was doing so well, and their Hogsmeade branch was doing just as well a cart load of lost Ghoulikins would hardly break them. He went back to watching the drama unfold in the streets.

"It looks as if the booth exploded, there are broken pieces everywhere. What was Connor doing the lunkhead." Fred grumbled joining his twin at the window.

They both watched as people ran back and forth escaping the Ghoulikins screaming as if a horde of wild dogs were on their heals instead of a mean little pumpkin like looking thing with teeth. George laughed until his sides hurt Fred just shook his head.

"Well at least someone out there has some sense a simple freezing charm is all they needed." Fred scoffed as someone in the crowd did just that and all the little pumpkin like terrors froze in mid action.

"Yeah but did you see them R-" Georges reply faltered on his tongue, his rapscallion grin slipped from his face as a man strode from the crowed pushing past Conner and an old man who was giving him an earful. Connor was gesturing wildly at the pile of rubble that had been his booth but Georges eyes were fixed on the man.

"By George I don't believe it!"

Next to him Fred was staring just as avidly in just as much shock as George was.

Neither of them had seen Harry Potter for six years and here he was right outside their window shifting through the broken booth to clear the way for…

"FRANCIS!" Fleur shrieked in the exact moment that George recognized those pale skinny legs and shock of copper hair.

She was tearing out of the store before either of them could blink.

Harry wasn't worried that the boy would die but the gash on his forehead was nasty and needed a healing spell. He knew quick and easy ones standard Auror training, but he did not want to risk moving the boy if something else was wrong with him.

He pressed a hand to the boys cheek and the boy stirred. That was good at least, that meant he wasn't too badly hurt.

"Don't move, try and stay still for a moment." Harry advised him softly.

Blue eyes blinked up at him and grew wide, "You're…You're…" The boy moaned as he moved his head too fast and was rewarded with a jab of pain.

Harry sighed internally, he definitely wasn't hurt too bad if he could still marvel over his name.

"Yes I'm…"

Harry never finised the door of the Weasley's shop had flung open and a woman was flying out at him like a bat released from the depths of hell, she was shrieking much like one as well.

"YOU BASTID! FRANCIS OH FRANCIS SPEAK TO MIO!" She shrieked reaching out to grab the boy out of Harry's arms.

Harry hastily stepped back keeping the boy out of the woman's reach, her grabbing Francis and clutching him would only worsen the boys headache and might harm more them help.

Harry watched as the Weasley Twins came charging out after her, the glanced from her to him and grabbed her arms so that she would cease trying to claw Harry's eyes out.

"Fleur don't shake at him like that! He could have a concussion you might shake something loose." One of them warned direly as she continued to struggle. Hearing this her struggles died down and now that she wasn't flying at him like some beast Harry recognized her.

"Fleur?" He gapped at her.

"ES! An Ohat Ave you don with my baby?" She sniffled her fists balled beneath her mouth as if she was either going to sob or strike him.

Of course, he sighed glancing down at the boy who was still blinking up at him a little dazedly. With hair like that he could only have been a Weasley.

"You mind putting the boy down Slowly Harry." One of the twins nodded jerkily toward him.

Harry stared at them both feeling a slight pang in his chest. Once these two had been friends, had both trusted him and knew him. Once these two would have found this situation funny an humorous. For a shadow of a moment Harry allowed himself to imagine how different this moment could have been had he not been so stupid all those years ago.

He would know the little boy in his arms right now. He would have been his uncle. Fleur would be thanking him for rescuing him instead of cursing him. Fred and George would be grinning as usual no doubt thinking it a very grand thing that their young Nephew had stolen a broom and gone for a joy ride and caused mass amounts of panic.

Harry would have been frightened but once assured that Francis was ok he would have gone home to tell…

He felt his gut clench and something burn in his center. He pushed those thoughts away. What's done was done and the past could not be undone. No amount of wishing would ever turn back time.

But Mistakes could be corrected.

"He didn't hurt him young man! Your rapscallion of a nephew was being a hellion as usual and this kind young man was brave enough to rescue us all and drag him from his own folly! I think you owe Mr. Potter a bit more gratitude" The old wizard that had been scolding the young clerk now stepped forward to berate Fred and George.

Fleur paled reaching out for her son again and this time Harry let her take him. She cradled the boy to her crooning to him softly.

"Mama it's ok." The little boy mumbled his voice slightly gargled as if he were tipsy.

Fred's eyes had narrowed at the mans remark, "Oh I didn't think Potter had hurt him, I just don't want him touching a member of my family!" His eyes turned angrily to focus on Harry. "EVER!"

Harry flinched but stood his ground returning Fred's stare glare for glare.

The crowd around them gasped in disbelief glancing at the Weasley Twins with abundant dislike.

"Why I never!"

"That entire family owes him their lives and…"

"What can you expect from the Weasley's from day one they have treated him shamefully…"

"Despicable behavior! Your parents should be ashamed to have raised you. Mr. Potter has saved your skin more then once and you repay him with ungraciousness when he comes once again to your families rescue?" The old man wheezed looking like he wanted to swat Fred with his cane.

Fred was about to make a less then polite reply but George halted his movements by grabbing his arm and shaking his head. "He's right." He bit out tersely through gritted teeth. "I thank you for Frankie's sake."

"Now that you've been thanked you can take your bow and go sod off in a bottle of gin!" Fred inserted heatedly. George tightened his grip causing Fred to suck in a harsh breath of pain but it was too late.

Murmurs got louder in the crowd. And the old wizard actually reared back to smack Fred with his walking stick Harry interceded, the last thing he needed was violence.

"I'm glad the boy's ok. If you need me to…"

"We don't. Harry it's better if you just go!" George cut him off. Harry flinched whatever hope he had harbored that these two of all the Weasleys would harbor the least amount of hate for him dieing a swift death. George looked almost pleading, there was a flicker of empathy in his eyes but Fred was having none of it.

Harry sighed and turned to leave when he called out from behind him.

"Were you just happening by today Harry? You've stayed away for Seven years and we all like it that way! We don't need you, _She _doesn't need you!"

Harry stiffened his hands clenching into fists he was tempted to turn around and demand what he had meant by that. Was Ginny married then? He had not heard any such thing but he had hardly been keeping close track either. His heart began to pound painfully in his chest at the thought. There would be some man and a gaggle of little ones just like Francis running around.

Was she happy without him?

No. There was no use fearing the worst and he would not let Fred goad him into a fight. Once he reached the corner he ducked into the shadows and turned to watch George lead Fred and Fleur back inside. Fleur was rocking her son back and forth soothing him. George was ruffling the little boys hair and apparently saying something Fleur did not approve of because she swatted his arm.

A hallow ache ate away at his insides. Fred was right the Weasleys did not need him.

But Harry had always needed them.


	4. Chapter 4: Broken

"Aunt Ginny, Grandmother needs you!"

A child's voice that Ginny recognized as belonging to her six year old nephew Francis called through the door of the upstairs bathroom. Ginny was staring at her reflection in the mirror trying to put the tiny needle pin of the earrings Davey had gotten her for her last birthday through the tiny hole in her ears.

She knew she shouldn't have agreed to come home before the anniversary dinner, she should have gotten ready in her apartment and had Davey pick her up there but her mother Molly had insisted she needed her only daughters help with the unruly bunch that was their family.

Ginny hastily finished putting on her ear rings and didn't take any further time to check her appearance. It was mainly family and old friends tonight all of which had seen her in grimy sweets or a grubby medi-witche's robes. She could appear in a sack tonight and many would remark on how it was a step up.

She smiled ruefully at that thought but the smile slipped as she opened the door and saw Frankie, the little boy much preferred Frankie to Francis, standing there with a white cloth bandage wrapped around his head.

"Frankie what have you done to yourself now?" Ginny asked arching an eyebrow determined to scold the little boy this time. Her oldest brother Bill had been rebellious as child, and according to their mother a dare devil of the worst order. In his own way however he was serious and dedicated. Bill was dependable and didn't do anything overly outrageous. At least not often, no, that was the twins arena.

An arena that Frankie appeared to relish, she swore the little boy was trying his hardest to break every record his uncles had ever set and frightening enough Ginny would bet he was getting close. He even slightly resembled them, his fathers hair was not as light and coppery as his own his was deeper and darker. Perhaps it was a blending of Bills darker lochs and Fleur's flaxen hair, whatever the cause Frankie looked like he should be one of the Twins son rather then Bills.

Frankie grinned up at her with sheepishness that she didn't buy for a second.

"Well Mama wanted me to give uncles Fred and George a message but it's a long way to walk. Dad left his broom in the kitchen so..."

Ginny groaned, imagining all the injuries a six year old could acquire flying by himself. As a Medi-witch she had seen them all. "Frankie promise me you won't ever do that again you could have died!" She leaned down to grasp his shoulders to impress upon him the seriousness of the error he had made.

Frankie's gaze swept to the floor and he looked so downtrodden Ginny had to struggle to remain stern. The problem was every time she saw one of her Nephews or nieces, she felt such a pang of loss and a tug of longing in her heart it was hard to be upset with any of them for long.

Unconsciously she smoothed the hair back from his head and had to smile at the chagrined look in those blue eyes. The smile she had been fighting broke loos on her face, "I suppose it rather was far to walk but next time Frankie why don't you use floo powder?"

Frankie made a bored face, "Aunt Ginny a two year old could do that. That's no fun at all!"

It was too the sound of her daughters tinkling laughter, and to the sight of her daughter hugging her hellion of a grandson tightly to her chest that Molly Weasley saw as she rounded the corner. She had wondered what was taking Frankie so long to fetch Ginny and had come looking for her herself.

She sighed feeling moisture well in her eyes at the sight before her, wasn't it every mothers wish to see her daughter happily settled. She wanted Ginny to have children of her own to hug and to scold and couldn't believe the lies her daughter spouted about not wanting children. Lately Ginny's excuse for her unmarried state was she wasn't ready and she didn't really need children she had so many nieces and nephews she hardly felt a lack for children.

Molly smiled fondly at the scence before her, did Ginny think she could hide things from her mother? She knew her daughter better then anyone. If it was every mothers wish to see her daughter married with children, Molly was not like every mother. She just wanted her daughter to smile.

Oh Ginny made rather good pretenses at it, had been doing so for the last seven years. She was so good at it she could manage to fool her brothers and even her father. Ginny couldn't fool her mother though, she loved her children and new them better then they knew themselves.

She hadn't seen her daughter truly smile in years.

She sighed, she had truly had enough. All she wanted was Ginny's happiness and she would not allow Ginny's melancholy to continue unrebuked and unnoticed. "Frankie dear your mother is looking for you it's time to get into your dress robes." Molly spoke interrupting the hug between the two.

Frankie groaned, "Ah Grandma I hate dress robes they scratch!" He complained.

Molly smiled fondly at him and gave him a light swat on the butt as he passed, "Go on now, you have caused your mother enough trouble young man I suggest you go and go quickly,"

Frankie scampered off still grumbling under his breath. And Molly heard Ginny laugh, she turned to see her shaking her head.

"He's such a little scamp, poor Fleur." Ginny laughed.

Molly shook her own head chuckling, "Well she knew what she was marrying into she should have been prepared. Frankie's enough to give anyone gray hairs the poor dear. Don't tell them I said so or they would feel obligated to prove otherwise but he's worse then the Twins were."

Ginny laughed nodding and Molly marveled at what a beautiful young woman her daughter had turned out to be. Ginny didn't seem to notice the effect she had on men and she was all the more beautiful for it.

"Well Ginny girl you better not let your father see you. He might be tempted to lock you up, and what would your young man think then?" Molly teased her gently.

Ginny rolled her eyes, "Davey is not _My_ young anything!"

"Only because you keep telling him no Ginny girl. That poor boy has waited and been patient with you and our father just can't understand why you keep telling him no." Molly sighed exasperated with her daughters continued stubbornness. She placed both hands on her hips wondering how far Ginny was willing to take this farce she was making of her life.

"Mother, has it come to you and dad that maybe I just feel like it's too soon. Maybe marriage is just not for me." Ginny insisted trying to sweep past her.

What a load of balderdash. Molly let Ginny pass her but when she spoke next she was satisfied when Ginny stopped in her tracks." And I suppose if it were Harry Potter asking you for your hand you might not think that marriage wasn't for you?"

Molly watched her daughter noting the stiffness in her shoulders and the uncomfortable tilt of her head. She waited for her answer as well, love was a funny thing. It was impossible to resist and lord knew it wouldn't be denied for long. She had tried countless times in her youth to ignore her feelings for Arthur Weasley. Through no fault of his own he was the son of a poor man, if not completely poverty stricken he was in no way a match that her wealthy influence seeking father had wanted for his daughter.

If she had married into a powerful pureblood family her fathers political dreams at least might have become a reality. For a while she had tried to obey him, pushing Arthur and the love they shared away. She understood what it was like to push and push until you feared that you had lost everything. She could forgive Harry that.

She could not forgive the anguish she saw in her little girls eyes. The tears she had wept when she thought her mother couldn't hear her. That was the hardest thing Molly Weasley had ever had to endure. To know that the boy she had come to see as a son had been the cause of that pain was only salt on an open wound.

She was at odds with herself, she had always hoped more then anything that Ron and Hermione would stop their squabbling and get married and give her more grandchildren to coddle. She had especially hoped that one day Harry would return the youthful adoration her daughter seemed to have for him. She had laughed and been generally amused by her daughters behavior towards him in the beginning.

Why Ginny had been so infatuated she couldn't be in his presence without breaking something or completely making a twit of herself, the poor girl. She remembered that awkward beginning stage and had consoled her many a night that she would in time grow out of it. And then Ginny had nearly died and Harry had come to her rescue in the chamber and that Summer Molly had found his name scribbled on countless pieces of parchment, and her daughter could not seem to stop talking about how wonderful Harry was.

Molly smiled fondly in memory, Harry was that. If she allowed herself to think on it which she did quite often Harry had been an amazing young man. To be just a child and to bear what he had been forced to bear was amazing in itself. She gave him free license to whatever angst and stupid mistakes he felt the need to make.

She could not give him license to cause her child such pain. That she could not do at all. It hurt but if she had to choose between supporting Harry and one of her own children she would always choose one of her own. As a mother how could she do anything else.

How she had wanted them to be together. Harry made Ginny truly happy. He made her smile.

She missed her daughters smile. She hated the man who had taken it away.

"Mother if Harry showed up right this instant and proposed I'd smack him till my hand fell off. I have some pride, allow me it. Would you go back to him if you were me?" Ginny finally replied after a pregnant pause.

Molly shook her head, "Those are brave words dear but your actions speak otherwise. Davey is kind, he really enjoys your company and feels for you. You have a lot in common and he wants to Marry you. There isn't any reason you shouldn't except his offer of marriage especially since you have been dating for so long. I didn't raise a tease so I know you aren't just stringing him along. No point to fact you don't want him because he isn't Harry Potter!"

Ginny finally whirled around to face her. "Mother that's Ridicules! I'm not some silly school girl anymore. That arrogant little twit would _just_ like it if I pined after him! Well I have a wonderful boyfriend who adores me and wishes to marry me and I will! Just…not now. " At her pointed stare Ginny blushed a little and continued heatedly, "Not for the reason your thinking. Davey hasn't asked me again since the last time I said no but when he does I might just say yes this time. You just see if I don't, pining after Harry Potter the very thought makes me want to hurl!"

Molly could have laughed but she kept her grin in check as their was a sudden out burst of sound signaling a guest had entered their home. Davey.

"That would be him right now, excuse me Mum but my date is waiting." Ginny spoke stiffly turned on her heal and marched away looking all the more beautiful in her fury.

Molly finally allowed herself to chuckle once Ginny was out of earshot.

"That was Sneaky of you love." Arthur's voice spoke coming up from behind her.

She turned to face him and smiled, "Nothing gets our girl going by pointing out things she doesn't like. Ginny absolutely hates useless girls who cry after what they can't have. And don't look at me like that Arthur I won't let her become one! Oh if only Harry hadn't been so foolish" She seethed.

Arthur immediately scowled. "That young man broke our daughters heart. For a while there I feared we'd loose her and you feel sorry they aren't married!"

" I want her to be happy with a good man. If Harry Potter could prove to be one I'd have her at the alter in a blink." Molly nodded fiercely.

Arthur's scowl blackened, "I'd shoot him before he could say "I Do". If I saw that young man right this instant you'd have to send me to Azkaban! Just forget it Molly. Davey's a good man and now that she's all fired up she'll realize her folly and won't keep him waiting any longer."

"Oh Arthur if she doesn't love him it will only make them both miserable if she marries him just to prove she doesn't still…" Molly tried to insist but Arthur interrupted her stormily.

" if not him some other fellow will come along, I don't care who it is but it will Never, _Never _be Harry! He isn't getting within a foot of her. Look Molly I loved him too but he is Not our son. As much as we wanted him to be if it comes to him or Ginny I will always choose Ginny and he nearly destroyed her. He isn't getting near our daughter again."

Molly sighed accepting defeat because he was right. Harry was a drunk, and too emotionally unstable to _not_ hurt Ginny. Her jaw tightened and her lips thinned, and that settled the matter for her.

change of scene

"Ok so you ran into the brothers today, the two most likely not to hate you to the point of death and _SURPRISE _they both seem to want you to die a horrible death and both would pay to watch. Am I correct?" Corrine Wintworth asked him as Harry survived his reflection in the mirror.

He hadn't worn expensive dress robes in a long time, since getting serious about his job he had really not had much need. Knee deep in dark wizard hunting and paperwork there really wasn't much need for finery.

But if he was going to crash an anniversary party he might as well look his best.

Corry, and Devon literally his partners in crime had insisted on coming along as both his support and his protection. Working with them for four years had caused the three of them to become very close he almost felt these two knew him better then anyone. He felt he could talk to them about almost anything and hadn't even realized he bored them with tales of his youth and the two who had made it worth living until Devon had dryly suggested that although he loved hearing about the golden trio he would much rather see them.

Meaning Harry instead of bemoaning the loss of Ron and Hermione should get off his arse and do something about it.

Harry grinned ruefully. Dev was blunt if anything.

Corry and Dev had been engaged when Harry had first met them and had been newly married for a year now. The two still squabbled like brother and sister and oddly enough looked as if they could be brother and sister. Corry's strawberry blonde hair that tended to get a bright copper in the summer and a more sandy blonde in winter was exactly like her husbands. Corry was only a few inches shorter then him and except for her curves they were both tall and slight of build.

"You're correct Corrine. The Weasley brothers made it quiet clear Harry could be drowning and they'd grab some popcorn to enjoy the show." Devon replied for him from the kitchen of Harry's apartment striding out into the hall and into the bedroom a bowl of noodles steaming in his hands.

"Do you ever stop eating _my _ food Devon!" Harry grumbled good naturedly not bothering to dignify his statement. Besides although he hadn't looked like he was willing to invite Harry for tea anytime soon George at least had not appeared to want his immediate death. Fred was the more livid of the two. It wasn't much but it was something.

"So knowing this you feel the need to crash their little party why?" Corry asked dubiously from where she was sprawled out on his bed.

"Haven't you been listening to him jabber on for the last four years Corrine? He's in love with the sister and because he was a complete asshole he lost her." Devon remarked taking a spoonful of noodles.

Harry shot him a glare, "Gee thanks Dev,"

Corry waved away his comment still frustrated, "And you think showing up tonight and saying _SURPRISE _hey honey I'm sorry, is going to help?"

Harry opened his mouth to reply but Devon cut in before he could.

"What I don't get is why it's such a big deal yeah he said a few mean things but why do they want to wring him till he's blue?"

Corry shot to her feet and gave her husband a chiding glance, "A few mean things? He was a complete and utter beast! Not to mention a drunken cad who cared more about what was between a woman's legs then her name!"

Harry could feel his face go beat red, yeah he knew he had been less then the ideal boyfriend but really did they have to talk as if he wasn't present. "I am still in the room!"

"Good because I have to ask you before I willingly go in the line of fire for you. Why this girl cause the Weasleys aren't known for their sunny tempers. Hell Harry if you did that to my Sister _I'd_ beat you to a pulp and I don't like getting my fists bruised as you well know. So the Weasley brothers are going to try and make silly putty out of your face and as your partner I'll be obliged to try and keep your broken bones down to a minimum. Humor me, why is it worth it?" Deavon remarked cryptically

Corry gave an exasperated sigh, "Isn't it obvious he's still in love with her. What kind of question was that."

"Corrine let the bloke answer for himself for once!" Devon snapped in exasperation at his wife he crossed her arms and gave him an answering glare.

Harry used to them smiled, "Your as bad as she is Dev, you two were made for each other. Corrine talks to much and has a temper and Is far to impulsive. Devon your cynical, a little too cold sometimes and too serious for your own good. Neither of you really know how to show love when you feel it instead you take bites out of each other and actually find pleasure in it. In short no one else would put up with you but you put up with the other because you couldn't imagine life apart." He spoke and was gratified when both of them were finally silent and just stared at him. Both of them knew the truth of his words and listened with somber silence, they cast each other small smiles and Harry could see the love in both of their eyes for the other.

He felt a pang in his chest, he remembered a time when his eyes could wander across the great hall and catch Ginnys and he could see his own love mirrored in her eyes. Ginny was by no means perfect she was a little too prideful and slightly judgmental, but he loved her all the more for her faults. When he spoke he was no longer speaking completely about his two friends. His words were an echo of the love he had lost. "Dev, you love Corry despite her faults because she's willing to beat you over the head when you get too full of yourself. She doesn't back down or cry like every other girlfriend you've had. She gives as good as she gets and most of all she _knows _you! She doesn't just see the Chief Aurors son, or money . She doesn't just see a _hero_, in her eyes you're about as far from a hero as can be because she sees the real you. And she loves you anyway. She knows just how much of a mess you really are deep inside and she dared to love you anyway when any sane woman would have run."

Harry sighed. Ginny had, she had seen all six years of his life since starting Hogwarts knew his every dark moment saw into the grieving selfish heart of the sixteen year old that he had been, he had been brash, arrogant and foolish. Looking back at what he had been like at sixteen he declared himself a fool twice over.

And yet she had dared to love him. To believe in him.

He had failed her. Failed himself.

"Damn, with reasons like that I better get dressed." Devon muttered.

Corrine swatted him on the arm, "You're being cynical again. I'll get dressed too I can't wait to meat this saint who could love _that_ mess." She giggled nodding towards Harry.

Harry rolled his eyes. "with friends like you two…" He muttered.

Devon grinned and winked at him, "who needs enemies. You especially don't need anymore. Former Death Eaters, Dark wizards alike, The Malfoy's, The Weasley's the list goes on. You may be a mess Harry but you're our favorite mess."

Harry grimaced, "Thanks I got all warm and fuzzy."

Harry had to wait a half hour for his partners to be suitably attired and near the end he was so impatient to be off that his nerves felt near the fraying point.

"Relax will you! You're always so eager to get beat up Harry." Devon pointed out as the walked towards Diagon Alley.

"Oh I am not!" He refuted irritably. He was past the stage where he was trying to break his neck in every way possible.

Corrine was shaking her head, "yes you are now that I think on it Harry. It's not so much that you're overly reckless or don't care about your life anymore."

Devon nodded continuing where she trailed off, "Yes it's more like you have this insatiable urge to forget. When your on the job if you can get in the eye of the storm in the center of all the action you don't have time to dwell on Memories…or nightmares."

Harry stiffened and his step faltered. He felt a tremor go up his spine he could almost feel the dread the terror of his night dreams rising up to haunt him even while awake. "You know about those?" He asked quietly.

"Harry we've had to sleep on the field a few times…you were loud enough to wake the dead and were sweating enough to fill a swimming pool…maybe if you just talked about what happened when you battled You Know Who then they would stop." Corrine spoke softly.

Harry shivered the summer night suddenly cold, his body suddenly taught with tension his heart leaping into his throat.

He laughed and even to his own ears it sounded bitter.

To talk? Harry would have loved to talk about it.

Except he didn't have words. How did one put into words all the horrors of unspeakable evil. Horror so great he had scratched at his eyes in an effort to gauge away the images and been so successful that the medi-witch that had tended him had thought an animal had mauled his face!

How did one put into words what it truly meant to be cast into hell and to find yourself released but to have to walk around in fear that every night when you closed your eyes it could rise up to reclaim you?

"I can't: I don't want to relive any of that, it's better left forgotten. "

Devon and Corrine let the matter drop and Harry turned his focus to the less then happy reunion he was sure was on it's way.

He knew his nightmare were a problem and they needed fixing but he was afraid there was no fixing them. Nothing would ever wipe away what he had seen. For awhile he had let all that he had lived through completely destroy him but he was not going to let it any longer.

He tightened his fists and gritted his teeth , he'd go down kicking and screaming before he let something as simple as a dream drag him down to join the enemy he had already vanquished.

Corrine watched Harry stride with determination down the streets and leaned over to whisper into her husbands ear. "Is Harry going to be ok?"

Devon watched Harry, he wanted to say yes. He wanted the best and good Lord how Harry deserved it. He deserved just one measure of peace! Harry still had one more battle to fight though and this one was the most important one.

This one would decide whether Harry Potter lived or died.

"He doesn't even know how bad they're getting Corry, he never remembers afterward. He's starting to have them in the daytime when he's awake." Devon shivered keeping his voice low so Harry wouldn't hear.

Corrine's lips trembled, "Damn it Devon he needs serious help! He hasn't become a danger to his job but if he keeps having these waking nightmares the chief is going to notice it and Harry is going to loose his job. That's all he has right now, and add the fact that the woman he loves would gladly watch him choke and he'll crack. He's already cracking all because he won't open up to anyone."

Devon shook his head, "That's just It Corry I don't think he can. There isn't anyone who would understand, you don't hear him when he's in one of those nightmares some of the things he says scares the hell out of me and I have a feeling I'd rather not hear what he went through at all!"

"Devon there has to be someone! Harry can't keep it bottled inside it's destroying him!"

"Weren't you listening earlier, I think there is someone Corrine. The one person who really saw him, who looked at him and saw what a mess he was."

Corrine's eyes brightened and she looked expectantly toward their destination.

"And she dared to love him anyway."


	5. Chapter 5: Glass

"It's hard to imagine that the bloke you held bogey picking contest with would be celebrating eight years of marriage to a woman who completely out classes him but that's the funny thing about life… "

Ginny groaned as her older brother Charlie's speech went from bad to worse. The crowed gathered at the Pot of Gold didn't seem to mind though most everyone gathered was a family friend and thought Charlie's insight to Bill's character was both humorous and insightful. Almost as insightful as the Twins speech had been.

It seemed that every year they came up with a new tale to regale their rapt audience with, Mrs. Weasley was treated to stories that she found she was glad she had not been aware of until that moment. Tales of baby sitting gone awry that Bill had somehow forgotten to mention all those years ago seemed to pop up like daises.

This was a source of delight and a source of teasing and if Ginny was honest with herself she looked forward to it. She looked forward to the day when she was married and her brothers would teaser her about the crush she had on Harry. So bad it had been that she couldn't be in the same room without dropping something and worst of all that singing Valentine she had tried to give him…

The pleasant reflection on her youthful foolishness brought a slight twinge of pain. No Fred and George wouldn't do that, because she would never marry Harry and they would never speak his name in fond indulgence again. These days Harry's name seemed to be mixed in the group of four letter words.

Ginny darted out of her contemplations by raucous laughter and wild applause and turned red realizing Charlie's speech was done and that he had walked over to bill and the two were now clasped in a tight brotherly embrace.

"I honestly don't know how your mother stayed sane raising your lot." Davey's breath tickled her ears as he leaned over to whisper into it.

_Enough dwelling on Harry, you have even your own mother convinced your still in love with him. Which by the way you most definitely are not! You will not be a spineless little ninny who withers away when some blind fool won't notice her. _She firmly ordered herself as she turned to smile up at him.

Davey cut a fine figure in his dress robes, his tailored pants slimming his waist not that it really needed much slimming. His coal black hair was slicked back in a kind of tailored neatness that should by all rights be attractive.

_It's slightly annoying how neat his hair is all the time. Doesn't that say something about a person? Davey never lets loose, he's never impulsive or brash or even the least bit irrational. Neat and together, he is always this in every moment of her life. Nothing like Harry._

That's what she liked about him, Ginny never had to fear that Davey could destroy her will to live, could smash her heart with a few carelessly tossed words.

"Did I tell you Ginny I talked to Arthur before we left?" Davey asked her a little too nonchalantly to be completely innocent.

What was he up to, Ginny wondered she shook her head and waited for him to illuminate.

Davey took a deep breath. "You look so beautiful tonight, black goes lovely with your skin."

Ginny felt sure her pinks had gone a little pink, several people had remarked upon her dress as she had entered. It was simply but elegant and beautifully tailored. Angelina and Charlie's wife Alice had insisted on helping pick it out and she had to graciously admit they had chosen with taste. They had however chosen it in red but Ginny had insisted on black.

Davey as if reading her mind continued, "You wear far too much black though. You act as if you are in mourning. Only I can't figure who died."

Ginny sighed as Davey took her hand in his. "It's not who but what." She spoke softly. So softly that for a moment it looked as if he hadn't heard her at all.

But then his brow furrowed in confusion, "Something? This isn't one of those symbolic deaths is it. You can't be mourning your lost childhood or some other nonsense?"

When Ginny laughed Davey watched her laugh with a longing gleam in his eyes, he wasn't the only person to turn and stare at her. The women looked on in fond indulgence and the males looked on in appreciation.

Ginny had no idea how beautiful she _did_ look tonight. Her white gloves were a beautiful contrast to her dress, her eyes fare sparkled with enjoyment. The pins she'd used to pin up her hair in the wispy ringlet style it was in seemed to catch the light of the thousands of floating candles and to shimmer.

The woman was a vision.

Davey could feel himself hunger every time he looked at her.

"Ginny come walk with me"

...Change of scene...

At the rap on the back door directly behind the kitchens Seamus cast a wary eye around breathing a sigh of relief when he spotted no one. He crossed the kitchen quickly and opened the door to usher Corrine, Devon and Harry inside.

"About time, you had me afraid you hadn't gotten my massage and any minute now you were about to come traipsing through the front door." He said with relief.

"We got your message alright, and even if we hadn't we may be on a fools errand but we aren't fools. The front door is the surest way to draw attention." Corry assured him removing her outer cloak to reveal the wine red gown beneath.

Devon took it from her and tossed it on a hook by the door. Harry nodded and glanced around as if expecting to see Ginny hiding behind a table.

Seamus had to bite back a smile, "Alright you know the plan right? Dean is going to grab Ginny make up some excuse to get her back here and hopefully you two can talk in private without any fire works and my tavern can stay in once piece."

"Right…do I look…well decent Seamus?" Harry asked distractedly glancing despairingly at his reflection in the glass over the kitchen sink.

Seamus laughed giving him an eye over. Harry _did _look rather dashing in his dress robes and his hair had been cut recently. Not to a horrible shortness, but neither was it terribly long or shaggy anymore. It curled rather nicely around his ears and simply hung there in its usual tangled disarray.

Harry was not tall…nor would he ever be it seemed but neither was he terribly short; and really it hardly mattered his five feet eight inches worked well with Ginny's five feet six. Well Seamus didn't know that for sure they hadn't stood next to each other in seven years. Even still the cut of his robes was nice and made him appear taller and outlined his lean and Seamus had to admit well taken care of frame.

It had to be from being an Auror, Seamus had to struggle these days to stay lean but Dean, Devon and Harry seemed to be doing just fine with no effort that Seamus could see.

"You might repulse Mrs. Weasley a little, unruly hair tends to make her fingers itch but otherwise your not too revolting." Seamus replied glibly.

Harry gave him a glare in response and Corry chuckled. "If you want a woman's opinion Harry, if I weren't saddled with _that _lout over there. I'd snatch you up." She reassured him sticking her tongue out at her husband playfully.

Devon rolled his eyes at her, and Seamus chuckled. "Alright I better rejoin the party before anyone misses me. Corry and Devon you might want to get out of sight to give Harry and Ginny a little privacy." he suggest heading for the door leading to the dining area.

Devon and Corry nodded, and Harry let out a deep breath.

"Well… ready or not…"

...Change of Scene...

Ginny liked the feel of her arm in his as they walked just outside the doors of Pot of Gold on the street with the soft glow of lamps and the moon their only light.

This late at night most of the shops and establishments were closed but there were a few couples, rowdy young men and rebellious teenagers still on the streets. After all it was mid summer and the night was warm and it was still young!

She liked the sound her heels made on the street as the walked at a slow leisurely pace.

The scene would have been perfect if she hadn't been so tense, if she didn't feel like she was walking a tight rope and about to loose her balance.

She recognized that look in his eye, the way he seemed impatient and slightly upset with her. The gleam that told her that although he was a gentlemen at heart waiting was wearing on him, and it was the growing impatience that caused him to ask her so frequently.

_You are so unfair to him. You continue to see him knowing how he feels and what he wants. He has been honest with you, it is unfair to string him along and make him wait while you put your life back together._

The voice of ones conscience could be both wise and annoying in the extreme, Ginny discovered as hers continued to berate her for her behavior.

"Ginny I'm trying really hard to give you time. I just don't understand, I've made it clear that I love you right? Isn't that what all women want? To be loved, well believe me I do and I want…well I want to be mine. To be able to come home and call you and for you to answer. I want to be able to walk with you on my arm and have the whole world know that you belong to me…if that makes any sense. I'll be good to you, haven't I always been good to you?" Davey stopped suddenly clutching her arm his voice fierce and slightly pleading.

Ginny winced, _You knew this was coming. Are you going to give him the same old nonsense about not being ready?_

"Davey please I'm not…" She began.

"Then when will you be! I've waited two years for you to be ready. Ginny I have a life to live and to make and God knows I want it to be with you but how long am I supposed to sit here?" Davey scoffed already knowing what she was about to say. He had heard it so many times before.

Ginny felt something like tears threatening to gather in her eyes. When would she be ready?

She was ready now, had been ready to love and be loved and have a family of her own for Seven years!

In honesty a lot longer then that. She had been ready since the first time eyes as green as the sea had born into her own.

"Ginny please…this is the last time I'm going to ask you. I have my pride too you know and I've let you trod all over it. Would you please marry me?

Ginny froze for a moment, her body teetering on that invisible tightrope, the crowd below waiting with baited breath.

_You can't have him. He's made it glaringly obvious he doesn't want you. A good man is here who does swallow your stupid pride and just take it! _

_But I'll never be Happy with him!_

_You sure aren't happy now! You could be happy if you just let yourself. If you just forgot him!_

Davey waited patiently while she debated with herself. Davey let go of her arm in disgust and turned away furious with both himself and her.

Ginny felt a pang of loss. Last chance….

_So that's it then. You gave your heart to a Sodden low life and because of that you'll spend the rest of your life alone?_

She'd be damned first.

Ginny Weasley had far too much pride.

"Davey." She reached out grabbing his arm tugging him back to her. He sated at her his eyes alight with new hope.

She took her hand in his and jumped.

"It would make me very happy if you would make me Mrs. Langdon, David. I love Frankie and the other little ones but I want children of my own. I want…"

He voice faltered, she didn't want to lie to him and she couldn't really lie to herself either. She would stick to the truth she wanted kids of her own, wanted security wanted to be happy! To shake off the shackles that bound her, Harry Potter seemed to be her jailer.

Davey didn't seem to mind that she couldn't finish or find words he grabbed her by the waist and kissed her right there in the street. She heard cat calls and felt her face flame.

Other them embarrassment she didn't really feel much of anything.

Davey set her down and grinned at her, "it's becoming when you blush." He told he fondly patting her head.

Ginny felt a flash of annoyance, she wasn't a _dog _for Pete's sake.

Before she could remark on it the door of Pot of Gold opened and Dean stuck his head out. When he spotted them his eyes lit up.

"There you are Ginny, your mum needs help in the kitchens with some such." she heard him say as he strode up to them.

Ginny shook her head fondly, partially glad for the escape.

She felt jittery and energized. She was doing it, she was going to make something of her life. She was not _just_ Harry James Potters leavings! She would not act like it either.

"You should have known your mum couldn't stay out of the kitchen for long. Go ahead and help her Ginny dear I don't mind. " Davey grinned patting her head again.

Ginny felt her spine stiffen a little as she walked away.

_As if I needed his permission! Why doesn't he just start saying heel girl heel?_ A little voice inside her spoke up in annoyance. He better sense replied, _no man is perfect. You have the rest of your life to teach him what works and what doesn't. And if you can't well you have to take the good with the bad sometimes._

Dean had one eyebrow raised as he watched Ginny leave he turned back to Davey and she heard him ask, "Is there something I should know about? Since when is she _Ginny Dear_?"

She heard Davey's proud and slightly smug reply, "Since she agreed to become my wife."

However at that point the door closed behind her and she didn't hear Deans reply."

"Damn it!"

...Change of scene...

Harry was pacing the kitchen like a mad man. He had the strongest urge to run, stronger then it had ever been before. It was like a solo in his head, his heart seemed to beat to the repeated word in erratic thumps that he was sure weren't healthy.

_She hates you. Why torture yourself…it's not worth it…_

His heart escalated with each feverd response form his brain, with each second that he waited there.

He heard the tap of heels and he nearly fainted as his heart leapt into his throat.

"Mum I have great news you'll never…"

The door swept open and just as fast as his heart had been going before it slammed to a halt that was acutely painful in his chest. Unconsciously he put a hand to his chest and staggered a little.

There she stood, different then what he remembered yet the same.

He had been so blind, so unwilling before. He had ignored every blessing she had sent his way and in this one moment he was stricken to his core his knees threatening to fold in as his entire being seemed to surrender.

His heart was turning now and everything seemed to be falling into place.

"…Harry…" His name was barely a whisper on her breath her face was too pale and her body seemed to shake a little.

He didn't know how or where he got the notion to move but moving he was. His eyes never left her face, he was captured by her willing or not he had to confess that she was suddenly the air he breathed, the very ground beneath his feet.

His entire world had suddenly become her he could see nothing else. Understood nothing else.

He was standing inches from her now, he could see the tiny tremors going up her spine noticing the trembling of her lips.

Lips that he had once kissed, that he had once had the right to kiss….

He recalled their taste and part of him wondered if it had changed.

One finger of his traced the curve of her cheek, he marveled at remembered and present softness and noted that they came away wet.

She took a step back trying to gather herself together, Harry shook his head clear coming back to reality out of the explosion of emotion seeing her again had caused.

"Harry what on earth are you doing here?" She asked her voice quaking only slightly.

"I…I…" All of the words he had planned suddenly seemed useless, inadequate what could he say. He reached out to her, reached out for the steadiness of her the comfort of her presence and she backed away. He let his hand drop. "I'm sorry…That's why I came. I'm sorry for everything."

It was not enough nowhere near enough he knew that but he still looked up to her with hope.

She was shaking her head now, the swirling emotion in them fast becoming anger. "You're _sorry?_ That's all you can say to me! How dare you! Leave Harry! Just leave!"

He was loosing her and fast desperate now he tried harder, "Ginny I know it's not enough. I know I turned my back on us on everything. I was trying to protect you I…."

"Don't lie to me Harry say anything you want. Say you want a one night stand or to laugh at the little nobody who still clings on to you but please don't you lie to me! You weren't protecting me when you told me just what you thought of me. When you laid with every hussy who came your way, and when all I wanted to do was love you and all you could do was tell me how worthless it all was to you!" She seemed to explode then her angry tears running down her face her hands fisted as she advanced on him.

Raw wounds had opened in both of them at seeing each other. He had expected her anger but he had not expected the pain that seeing her again would cause.

The wounds had not healed, the pain was still so very real and no amount of time was going to erase it.

And still he longed to reach out and wipe away the tears running from her eyes.

So he did, and to his surprise she didn't resist. She shook against him sobbing into his chest as he held her her fist clenched.

"Why did you have to do this now! Why are you doing this? You were gone and you weren't coming back…I DON'T WANT YOU BACK!" She yelled beginning to pound on his chest.

Her words were like shards of glass scraping across the tender organ that was his heart. He understood. He held her tigher part of him suffering the other part marveling at the feel of her against his body, against his heart.

"I know…I Know…" He bit his lip tears beginning to gather in his own eyes. "What I did to you…there is no reason you should forgive me. But I had to try, I love you Ginny and I…I can't do this without you. You don't have to believe me right away but give me a chance and I'll prove it to you. I'm never going to love anyone else like I love you."

She shuddered against him and made and a small laugh of bitterness escaped her. "You're too late Harry. You're always too late to figure out what you want! You have no idea what love is until it slaps you in the face and by then I've already moved on. You think you've changed but you haven't changed a bit!" She scoffed swiping away her tears and pushing away from him.

Harry blinked at her in shock a stab of alarm going straight through him. What did she mean by that? Was she dating someone else, well that wouldn't deter him whoever the bloke was it was bloody well too bad for him!

"It doesn't matter to me if you have a boyfriend, I'm telling you that I've changed and I know what I gave up and I'd be damned stupid not to try and get it back." He declared with all the determination that he felt.

Ginny seemed to dislike this remark intensely she gave a cry of almost feral frustration, her hand flying to her mouth trying to hold in a sob that wanted to break loose. "Harry you are so thick! You can't just…you can't just walk back into my life…you can't just…"

The sob broke past the gate of her fingers and tore strait into his heart with a soft wail she rushed passed him.

"Ginny wait" He called rushing after her.

...Change of scene...

Devon was lounging outside the men's restroom when Dean came skidding by looking like hell was about to break loose.

"Did the brothers get wind that Harry's in residence?" He asked fearing the worst.

"No it's worse, Ginny just got engaged."

Devon closed his eyes the only word to adequately describe what was about to unfold escaping his lips.

"Hell!"

Change of scene

_Why?_

_Why Now?_

_Why did he have to come and say those things now._

Ginny ran to escape what she knew was inescapable.

Damn Harry Potter.

He hadn't changed a bit.

He was still breaking her heart.

"Ginny…Wait…Ginny…"

She could hear him behind her but she was already skidding into the hall way tears running down her face her chest wracked with sobs.

She slammed into a wall of flesh with arms that quickly wrapped around her.

"Ginny was that you yelling like a banshee in there, what on earth are you crying about?" She recognized Charlie's voice even though her eyes were closed tight and she was clutching onto his shirt for dear life like she had when she was a child waking up from a nightmare.

She wish she would wake up from this one.

Ron, Hermione the Twins and her parents came skidding around the corner at exactly the same moment that Harry did.

...Change of scene...

Harry panted for breath as he rounded the corner after Ginny's disappearing back as he did so he had to grind to a halt nearly falling to the floor with the loss of his momentum. Once he steadied himself he groaned inwardly.

He was in trouble now.

"YOU!" Fred thundered going to rush him. George managed to grab him around the waist before he could manage it though; but even he was glaring at Harry.

Charlie looked ready to tear him limb from limb as he held a trembling Ginny.

"What the bloody hell did you say to her?" He bit out.

"Who invited you anyway!" Ron spat shoving Hermione behind him as if to protect her. As if Harry made it his life's ambition to reduce women to tears.

Perhaps he did.

Harry stood firm, he had come to far to be pushed away by them. "I invited myself. I needed to talk to Ginny."

Harry felt something slam into his back and felt the breath leave his chest as he staggered forward. He whipped around to see what exactly had just hit him to see a glaring Bill behind him.

"Wrong" he said corrected him.

Harry tried to ignore the pain in his back that the blow had caused but he was loosing his temper and fast.

"Look I don't want to fight with any of you. I'm so---"

As soon as he started to form the apology Fred turned to his twin and demanded harshly. "Can I kill him now?"

"Wait!" George hissed.

"So you came to tell her you were Sorry did you. It's not nearly enough but it is well deserved. Give her your apology and leave!" Bill demanded nodding towards Ginny.

"I already told her I was sorry…and I didn't just come to apologize…I…" Harry looked from one stony face to the other and knew he was signing over his own death warrant. "Look I know I was stupid. I know what a fool I was but I love her and I was only trying to keep her safe and I made a terrible mis---"

He had made a mistake in turning to address Bill he felt someone tackle him from behind and he went crashing to the floor.

"KEEP HER SAFE!!! SHE NEARLY DIED BECAUSE OF YOU!"

Ron's voice was so full of rage Harry almost didn't recognize it but he definitely recognized those fists pummeling the back of his head.

He had not come here wanting to fight but his unwillingness only went so far, he was _not _going to be Ron's punching bag.

"RON STOP IT"

"HARRY STOP"

The shouts were muffled by the wringing in his ears as Ron's right fist connected with his skull. His knuckles protested as his own rammed hard against Ron's ribs.

"How am I responsible, I wasn't even here you oaf!" Harry panted trying to shove Ron off of him.

"that's right you sniveling little bastard. You weren't here! You weren't here to see what your fucking mistake cost her! Where the hell where you when she lay dieing? Pouring a bottle of whisky down your no good throat, I wish you'd choked on it! I wish…"

Ron Had been so busy yelling at him he hadn't been watching the one part of him that males guarded with their lives. Truth be told when fighting another male it was a strict code of honor that you left that part of the autonomy alone.

But Ron was closing his wind pipe with his meaty hands and Harry's vision was beginning to go black at the edges.

It was dirty but he was desperate.

Ron suked in a harsh breath of pain as Harry's knee rammed into his groin and he promptly let go of Harry's neck.

Harry gasped for breath and tried to blink away the spots in front of his eyes.

"Can I kill him now?" Fred demanded of his twin again

"let him go George the man needs killing. He want's a dirty fight he'll get one" Bill hissed rolling up his sleeves.

Harry didn't have any time to prevent the four of them from dog piling on top of him. The best he could do was try and give as good as he got.

Four on one was in no way fair odds, Harry decided to salvage what was left of his face and tried his best to cover it with his hands.

"Charlie stop them, they could kill him!" He heard Ginny's voice.

"If I wasn't so busy trying to stop you from stopping them I'd be with them!" he heard Charlie's reply.

"Dad?" He heard Ginny plead with her father.

"If I were younger but as I'm not I'll let them handle it!"

"Oh for heavens sake STOP!"

She was ignored.

"HEY!"

That had sounded like Devon.

"Who the bloody hell Are you?" Fred/George?

There was crashing and the sound of breaking glass as one of his attackers was given a slight distraction from pounding into him.

Harry could hear the sound of their scuffle even as he began to swing his own fists again.

It was still three on one and he was still going to loose but there was something so satisfying in feeling his knuckles connect with bone right in that instant that he didn't care.

"I'm COMING HARRY!"

A female this time. Not Ginny, Corrine.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE YOU RUFFIANS!"

"GET HER OFF FRED!" he heard Bill shout.

"FREDRIC WEASLEY DON'T YOU HIT THAT GIRL!" Mrs Weasley Screeched.

"WELL SHE'S HITTING ME!" Bill yelled.

It was two on one now, Harry intensified his efforts to give both Ron and Fred as much hell as he could muster.

Even still Harry was sure he was going to die beneath what felt like dozens of fists pounding into his body when he heard the sound of glass shattering and a bellow to rival that of a lion.

"EVERYBODY FREEZE!"

Amazingly the hailstorm of fists to his face ceased and Harry uncurled in relief his body aching like the devil himself had just tried to teach him penance.

His savior was Dean who held a broken bottle in his hand which he had cracked over Georges head. George lay groaning on the floor a slight stream of blood running down his face.

"What the bloody hell is wrong with you Thomas!" Fred demanded letting go of Harry and rushing to his twins side. Harry could hear glass crunching beneath his feet.

He could see a crowed of gathered people in the corridor now and there were cameras flashing.

"Bill, what ave you done!" Fleur demanded from the crowd rushing to her husbands side. She had to pry Corry off of his neck to reach him but she did. "Oh Get off !"

With an oof, Corrine rolled onto the floor where she panted to catch her breath. She ran to Harry's side and ran her hands over his face tenderly noticing the cuts and brusis already beging to disfigure him. "oh Harry your face." She lamented throwing her arms around him. Harry winced sucking in a breath his ribs felt cracked and at the very least sore.

"Sorry," Corry apologized sheepishly.

"Just what is going on here Ginny?" A man demanded pushing through the crowd and grabbing Ginny out of Charlie's arms.

Ginny shook her head. "it's nothing."

"I am hardly nothing! If your brothers weren't such…" Harry gave a grunt of pain as Corrine shoved her elbow into his aching ribs.

"So not the time Harry!" she muttered.

"No Ginny's Right Davey, he is nothing! And nothing of importance happened here." Charlie confirmed glaring at Harry.

The man called Davey sputtered in confusion. "My God man, That's Harry Potter you just mauled!"

"Yeah?" Fred spat sarcastically.

Ron wiped a stream of blood from his mouth, "I don't give a damn who he is he deserved every bit of what he got!"

The crowed all exclaimed at once. It was well known that the Weasleys disliked him, this was one of the many reasons they were a disliked family. But to assault him and to openly declare they were proud of the fact was sure to cause a riot.

"Here now Arthur! How could you let your boys behave like this, ever since that stint your daughter pulled…" Someone began.

"STINT! I hardly call Death eaters a Stint!" Arthur turned to shout furiously at whomever it was in the crowed.

"That was hardly Harry's fault he is not responsible for every former death eater out there!" Seamus offered in his defense.

"No! But he is responsible for what happened to her. Aren't you Potter! You knew bloody well that the death eaters wanted your blood for what you did to their master and to their lives! How the hell couldn't you figure that they would come after us. Of course we would be a target, you see the assumed you still had a soul and would actually care if they slaughtered us all! They nearly killed her and you didn't even care!" Ron demanded rounding on him looking ready to start hitting him again,

Harry felt shock slam into him.

He hadn't known…he hadn't known…

He should have. He knew very well for those first few years the Death eaters were out to kill him in a manic frenzy. He had hidden out at Remus too lost in a drunken haze to care much about anything.

It should have been obvious to him that people he loved would have been targets.

But Ron was right. He hadn't had a soul to care.

Ron spit in disgust and it just barely missed Harry's face. He turned to the man gripping Ginny's arm. "You want to do me a favor Langdon when you convince her to Marry you do it and keep this monster as far away from her as you can."

Harry felt shock become replaced with a black feeling of murky and hot Jellousy.

OVER HIS DEAD BODY!

The man Davey Langodon seemed to glow and smirk like a smug cat as he pulled Ginny closer.

Harry felt the stirring of something ugly and beastly in his chest.

_Well hello again. _

He had not felt the stirring of this particular beast since he was sixteen and had to watch Ginny with Dean. Watching this self important stranger hold Ginny seemed to awaken it from it's caged slumber.

"I already have. Ginny and I are getting married.

If Harry had been made of glass he would have shatter.

If Harry had not been suffering from what he suspected was broken ribs and a concussion he would have leapt on the man.

He could only blink as those words stabbed straight through his core like a spear and if his heart could have made a sound it would have been that of the shattering of glass.


	6. Chapter 6:Return of a Nightmare

"You can't behave like that Potter, it puts a bad name on this office. Now I know you were provoked everyone knows the Weasley's aren't saints but public brawls will not be tolerated in my office? Clear?" His chief, the chief of Aurors Mr. Finnworth berated him.

It was early evening and Harry had been called off the field by a messenger and told that the chief wanted to see him. He already had more then an inkling what about. He was actually surprised his boss had waited this long.

The headlines had been screaming about the fight since yesterday morning. People he knew offered him sympathy. Even people he didn't threw their lot in with him simply because he was everybody's hero.

Except to the one person it mattered.

He had never, never wanted to be a hero before but right now more then anything he wished he could have been one when it counted. When she was hurting and had needed him but he had failed miserably.

Harry's spirits had not been the highest to begin with but each moment of the day seemed to be lowering them. They had received a call from a wizard up in chutney who's neighbor had the funny habit of bringing women into his home and oddly enough they had the odd habit of never being seen again.

If knocking on the door of an Psychopaths door and inviting him to tango didn't brighten your day then having to deal with the muggle police department who insisted on arriving at the least opportune moment and getting in the way and getting one of their officers killed; sure didn't.

After that debacle he had apperiated back to headquarters to answer the call of his irate chief.

His day was getting better and better. He waited in silence for Mr. Finworth to say his piece; Harry was too tired to argue.

His tongue felt dry in his mouth his body seemed to ache and throb even though he had taken healing potions and by rights should be fit as rain. There was an empty black hole that had opened up inside of him and it was growing in size by the hour as it devoured his insides making him feel craven and empty.

_Ginny is getting married to that pompous lowlife!_

_You don't really know him…_

_I DON'T REALY CARE!_

Even in his own head his voice was a snarl of rage, perhaps it wasn't a black hole sucking away inside him but that inner beast loose from its cage gnawing on his insides until he wanted that man's neck beneath his hands.

Ahh but if he killed her intended what good would that really do him? Well he might still have the satisfaction for having done it but revenge was a cold bed fellow.

After his chief dismissed him Harry walked in a down trodden daze to sign out his hours and left headquarters. It was only fair he mocked himself; it was only fair that if he could break her heart that she could break his.

Had he really expected it to be as simple as an apology and a declaration of love? As if Ginny were some scatter brained heroine in a dime novel who had no better sense to sit around and wait for him?

He was disgusted with himself, with her for letting _Davey_ touch her, and with himself again for feeling that way.

It was so hot out, his tongue felt like past in his mouth his insides screamed for numbness.

Harry halted in his tracks. He closed his eyes taking deep breaths.

You see there was a pub around the next corner he always passed it on his way home. Usually he ignored it just wanting to get home and to plop down on his bed.

But tonight, tonight the voices whispered.

_Why bother anymore, you've lost give up!_

_Don't go down that road you've seen where it leads!_

_A couple of bottles isn't going to break you, you weren't addicted before just stupid._

_What do you call an addiction, I needed it to keep living that classifies as addiction and most books._

_Who bloody well cares, She's marrying some one else Ron and Hermione are going to hate you for the rest of their lives they already think you're a drunken sot what the bloody hell does it matter anymore!_

Harry shook his head hard trying to have space to think over the arguments his craving for the solace of liquor brought up and his internal fear that he could loose himself again.

It was not like he hadn't drunken a few since sobering up he had a bottle or two with Dean every now an again. However tonight he needed it too badly for it to feel completely safe.

_Just how strong are you? Are you going to run and hide every time there's a problem take your drink but don't let it rule you!_

_That is the most moronic logic and you know it!_

_But I don't care right now, I really don't._

And he didn't Harry marched with determination towards the pub.

…**Change of Scene…**

Harry heard the knocking on the door several hours later and he felt a burst of giggles escape him unwarranted. Their was something funny about all of this, or maybe it was the way the room seemed to spin beneath his feet tried to get up and found it was impossible.

He fell back to the floor with a grunt and another burst of giggles and lay there giggling to himself. The knocking became pounding and Harry called out in sing song.

"Come in…whoever it is…I have an inkling winkling…"

When Devon and Corrine swept into his apartment it was to the sight of him lying on the floor giggling over this stunning show of wit.

"Oh Harry" Corrine sighed dismayingly.

Devon scowled kicking away a bottle of snapping Sherry. "We didn't heal your body so you could trash it again you know. Are you an idiot Harry? Haven't you learned that this isn't going to help you any?"

Yes he had, he didn't expect this to help.

"Don't get your panties…" Harry had to stop to choke back laughter around the buzzing in his head the word panties seemed the height of hilariousness. "…In a bunch. I don't think I've fallen off the wagon yet. I tried believe me I tried…but wouldn't you know I can't. I bet you want to know why doooon't you Dev?" Harry almost sang flopping one arm listlessly over his face as he chortled.

"Boy he's flipped his gizzard." Corrine muttered.

Harry laughed and felt his stomach seize, "because part of me still believes I have a chance I only drank two before I just couldn't do it any more. I couldn't throw it all away because…" Harry had to gas for breath as he laughed. "….I want to make everything right so bad and… I still…believe I can…Isn't that funny Dev,"

Devon looked from him to Corrine and grimaced. He reached down and grabbed both of Harry's arms hauling him to his feet.

"If you're not drunk then you're cracking Mate! That is the least funny thing I have ever heard." He declared.

Harry was grinning manically at him, he sure thought so.

"Oh I think it's very funny Dev. Aren't fools always funny? I'm a fool, I've always been a fool ad I'm never going to be anything else. The whole world laughs at me I might as well laugh at myself. And what's worse I could just drink it all away but…"

Devon shook him so hard then he felt his teeth rattle in his head.

"You are a fool if you're just going to roll over and die! The only thing that makes you a fool is giving up without a fight! You keep doing that Harry! You can face a Dark lord or another wizard but you cant seem to face one _mere_ woman." Devon cried as he shook him.

Harry's creepily happy mood seemed to break around him and he shuddered. When he spoke it was so quietly Devon almost didn't hear him.

"She's not _mere. _You'd back down two if you had to face some one who held your life in their hands."

Devon sighed feeling his heart hurt for his friend and he pulled Harry into a brotherly embrace that was unusual for him.

"You are a fool Harry. She doesn't hold your life, your heart maybe but not your life."

"Oh Dev, don't you know they're one in the same." Harry sighed forlornly wishing he was weak enough to drown this numbness away.

"Then fight to live Harry, don't just roll over like a kicked dog. I can't stand it when people do that! It's late we should probably get you to bed." Corrine advised softly.

Harry nodded as his two partners lead him to his room and watched him climb into bed. He felt like two mother hens were hovering over him and didn't particularly mind the feeling.

Mrs. Weasley used to do that, to cluck over him and smooth the hair back from his eyes fondly as if he were just another one of her chicks.

He used to glow inside whenever she did that.

Harry sighed falling into dreams of a place called the Burrow.

Corrine and Devon stayed to watch over him, both of them feared for their friend.

"He isn't having one of those nightmares is he?" Corry asked fearfully hearing Harry toss in his bed in the next room.

Devon shook his head, "No…and that worries me a little."

…**Change of Scene…**

"Ginny are you decent dear?" Molly asked as she knocked softly on her daughter's door early the next morning.

"Yes mum, come in" came Ginny's muffled reply.

Well here went nothing, it was far past time she had a heart to heart with her daughter. For the past few days the debacle had replayed over and over in her mind. She had hashed and rehashed every detail in the hopes of coming to a solution.

She couldn't make a final decision until she knew two things. She was determined to know the first thing right now.

Ginny was packing her overnight trunks to return to the apartment she had formally shared with Hermione, when Molly opened the door and joined her. Molly looked her daughter over and was slightly relived that Ginny's pallor had evened out and she appeared well.

The usual sadness around her eyes was gone now, she noted. In its place was stiffness a kind of angry resistance.

Well that was a little better then the despair from the night before at the very least.

"I don't really need any help packing mum I didn't bring all that much." Ginny insisted thinking that Molly had come to fuss over her as usual.

"Oh I know that dear but I've come to ask if you have any sort of idea about your wedding plans." She asked excitedly. Out of the corner of her eye she shrewdly watched every move her daughter made.

Ginny stiffened for a moment then appeared relaxed even bored. "Oh we haven't set an actual date yet we have plenty of time to do that."

Molly frowned stilling her daughters hands as she moved to place a folded cloak in her trunks.

"You aren't thinking of a long engagement are you dear?" she could tell by her eyes that's exactly what Ginny wanted most, " I see no reason too and nobody else will either. You and David were together for three years before he even started asking you and you've kept him waiting for two more years. I would think he is more then sure and more then willing. Now that you've said yes lets get on the ball, I don't think this family could take one more Ronald length engagement. That boy has me on edge every moment."

Ginny flinched a little and cast about for something to say, "Ron isn't going to back out on Hermione mum it's obvious he loves her."

"Yes that is why I can't pin down what on earth he is dithering about for. Two years is a long time to be engaged." Molly insisted.

"I've heard of longer, believe me if you want to see a long engagement, I'd be more then willing to show you what that looks like mum." Ginny grinned, and Molly could tell she was only half joking.

Her heart sank a little, she had hoped that Ginny would make this easy for her by actually being excited and madly in love with her intended.

She sighed when were things ever easy with _her_ children.

"Ginny you do know that I'll blacken your hide if you marry that man and you're unfaithful to him?" Molly asked her sternly.

Ginny blinked rapidly in affront, "Mum! I've never cheated on a man in my life!"

"You must be honest with me Ginny I know you too well, you may not have cheated but you have always played a little loose with anyone who wasn't Harry. Everyone else was just practice to you and you know it. Something to keep you busy while you waited for him to get a clue as it were." Molly insisted.

Ginny flushed and she could tell she had unmeaning just insulted her daughter. "Well, first that complete cad shows up to rub in my face that I'm pathetic, then my own mother thinks I'm a loose woman…hasn't this been the happy homecoming."

"Ginny I didn't mean that I think you intentionally play men false. Its very much deliberate though. What I mean is simply that when Harry had his eye on that…that…change girl don't you remember how it all whent?"

"You mean Chang? Cho?" Ginny asked confused.

Molly waved her hand dismissively, "Whatever her name was Harry was tripping all over himself over her and you were of course distressed. At first you cried and bemoaned how cruel fate was and asked me why boys were such…how was it you put it?"

"Monkeys, Dogs, morons take your pick I think I've said them all." Ginny laughed dryly.

Molly grinned, "yes I believe it was one of those. Well you had your cry and then you told me quite decidedly with your little nose in the air that you were _over_ Harry and if he was too stupid to see the truth then that was all well and fine for you. Then next thing I know my daughter who never once looked in a mirror in her life is fluffing her hair in bath rooms and tossing that very same hair at any boy who might look. Don't look at me like that Ginny there is nothing wrong in that, you were young and you're a woman. They don't make hair potions and low cut tops to hang on the wall to admire. You wanted to bee seen as the young and beautiful woman you were becoming."

It was true, at some point every young woman stopped grubbing around in the mud with her brothers to take a look at herself in the mirror and at the very least wondered if perhaps she did her hair a different way a certain someone might make a remark.

"The Point Ginny dear was any idiot could see you were most definitely not _over_ Harry, You chose an age old tactic that has proved victorious to many times for women to discount. When you were just Ron's little sister he completely overlooked you. When you had someone on your arm and you fair sparkled with the joy of having someone look at you it was impossible for him to miss, and he watched you Ginny. Your father and I had a lot of laughs over the way his eyes followed you around all of fifth year. And sixth year, I felt sorry for the poor boy he was so complete out of his element" Molly chuckled as even as she spoke the memories came back to her.

Ginny's face softened and she began to shake her head and chuckle. "I thought he was going to jump out of his skin when I reached out to get that "_Maggot_" from his hair. There wasn't one you know he just looked so cute at the table with his hair all mused and blinking at me." She giggled.

Molly felt a warming glow in her stomach as Ginny genuinely smiled.

That decided things on one score. Her daughter was still in love with Harry. Harry brought smiles to her face and made her Happy.

"I knew that Ginny anyone with eyes could see that. Watching him struggle with a concept we could have told him from the beginning was amusing to watch. The point is Ginny you had a goal and you never really gave it up, you went to battle in the way all women go to battle. Harry hurt you so you struck back with the only weapon you had. Forcing him to get a good look at what he'd given up. And when he started to realize you had fun guiding him along didn't you? And as soon as it was evident he was caught and caught good you must admit you ditched poor Dean like nobodies business."

Ginny flushed, shaking her head "oh Mum am I really that awful?"

Molly chuckled wrapping her daughter in a hugg, "Well I can't say it was model behavior but the both of you were young. Boys go through girlfriends a week Dean was not irreversibly harmed was he?" She set Ginny back a little looking her in the eye trying to impress upon her the importance of what she was getting at. " But You're adults now Ginny. If you marry David you can't ever have Harry, ever! The world might consider divorce an easy way out but I raised you better. You know what you want before you say I do and once you do you stick with it! You take the good and the bad. So if you want him marry the man, give me a few more grandbabies to spoil. But if you have even an inkling of doubt, don't you dare step one foot in that church Ginny!"

Molly hugged her tight again, "I know you're confused and your scared. I know you love all of us but you have a bit of a road ahead of you. Don't turn until you're sure. And don't let your brothers or even what I might say deter you from what you know is _right_! I'm proud of you Ginny and I know in the end you'll be just fine."

Molly gave her one last patt on the back and left her to think. She did believe that in the end Ginny would make the right choice. In the end Ginny was going to be with the man who made her happy, but Molly Weasley would be tied and shackled if that man wasn't a good man.

If Harry potter wanted her daughter he was going to darn well prove he was a good man before Ginny stepped foot in a church.

**Change of scene**

"Potter you look like hell!"

Harry could only manage a grunt in reply to Deans cryptic statement. He knew he looked a complete mess. It was hardly his fault his dreams had been restless what had started out pleasant had ended on a tight wave of tension that he neither understood nor particularly liked.

He could still feel that tension in his nerves, he was strung so tight he felt on the verge of snapping. He had rolled restlessly in his bed knowing exactly what was coming. They always started this way.

Warm and pleasant completely nothing to fear, sometimes he was laughing with Ron sometimes his parents were there and they were having a picnic. No matter, one minute he was happy and content, looking forward to the future and then the crendo would mellow and the music of his life became low and haunting.

And he knew the shark was advancing, the masked killer was just around the corner but he could do nothing about it. Just like in the muggle pictures no matter how much he screamed at himself to look out in the dream he kept on smiling until it was too late.

Then the nightmare would begin.

Except sometimes something would wake him up before the nightmare could begin, like this morning when Devon had rushed him awake saying they had a call. Harry had stumbled into his cloths his body still caged and tense the edges of the nightmare clinging to his skin.

He hadn't showered, an Auror on duty didn't have time for that when their was a call and he hadn't eaten either. So yes Hell was a perfectly adequate way to describe and how he felt.

The room was fast filling with all the Aurors who had answered the chiefs call and a moment later he strode in. His slightly balding head looked very shiny in the light and his slight beard made him resemble father Christmas but his stern glance and slightly haunted eyes destroyed any resemblance.

"Donnelly?" he shouted beginning their emergency team roll call.

"Accounted for!" James Donnelly called out from a bench where he was sitting a cup of coffee in one hand his wand in the other.

"Is your team ready and assembled?" Finnworth barked.

"Donnelly, Ingles, Collins, Hunt and Jameson ready and accounted for!" James barked in reply.

"Thomas?" Finnworths eyes searched the crowd.

Next to him Dean straitened and answered. "Accounted for!"

"Is your team ready an assembled?"

Dean's eyes flicked over him and amongst the crowd, he nodded sharply. "Thomas, Potter, Wentworth squared, and Irving ready and Accounted for!"

Mr. Finnworth nodded sharply in return his eyes flickering to each person as Dean checked in his team. His eyes stuck on Harry for a moment and Harry got the feeling he was found wanting by their judgmental gaze.

"Phillips?" the chief barked.

Their was a moment of silence. When Casey Irving spoke up his chestnut curls bouncing in nervous excitement. Casey had rookie written all over him.

"Erin's team got held up in Manchester chief something about a crazy pedestrian in a muggle train station."

Chief cursed, "Damn that only makes your job harder. There's a former D.E. up in Havenlane threatening to off his wife and his kid if we don't _hand_ over Harry."

Just about thirty eyes turned to him in speculative sympathy. Former Death eaters were always their worst cases. They were on the run to begin with, unwilling to face trial and being sent to Azkaban. That meant they were living by the skin of their teeth and since a lot of them had formerly been wealthy their seemed to be a lot of resentment towards the boy who lived whom they rightfully blamed for their losses.

Threatening your own wife and child was sheer desperation and a form of evil that Harry found intolerable.

"What do you have to say to that Potter?" Chief asked wryly already guessing Harry's response.

Harry felt a grin spread on his lips and his blood begin to stir. Adrenaline was beginning to trickle through him and he actually itched to begin the hunt. He wasn't the only one beginning to stir murmurs began to trickle through the crowd.

"Well since he's taken all the trouble to invite me I think it would be rude not to show up to his little party, don't you think so Gentlemen?"

A roar of approval went through the crowed and Chief let it go for a moment before he waved his hands to bring them all back to silence. "That's a sure fire way to get your arse in a pickle. Don't go in there looking for blood! Remember the best way to get a man is peacefully. If you can talk him in to surrendering without endangering the woman and child do it."

"What if he hurts the woman or the kid?" some one shouted.

Chiefs eyes ran over the crowd again his lips thinning. His eyes connected with Harry's and something flickered in their depths.

"Then you know department rules we're dark wizard catchers not killers! My unit is not going to come under media cross fire hear me?"

There were murmurs of dissent and a clear dislike for this order to restrain from actually taking life, but one glare from him and they quitted.

"Clear out and get ready to disband into position!"

There was the rustling of numerous cloaks and the idealistic crowing of rookies. Acompanied was the dry disillusioned laughter of more senior members who rolled their eyes at the exuberance showed by the younger members.

They would learn, and learn in time.

Harry moved his wand from its sheath in his cloak to his hand and moved to follow his team when he felt a hand clamp on his shoulder.

"Potter can I have a word?" Chief asked without really asking.

Dev arched an eyebrow and shrugged, and Dean frowned. "You want Privacy chief?" Dean asked.

Their chief eyed the rest of Harry's team and seemed to make a decision. "No, Harry might actually need back up for what I have planned. Keep this in the closet gentlemen but things are not as sunny as I painted them. Our first reports have come in and by all accounts the woman is six feet under and the sight is going to reduce most of the rookies on Donnelly's team to blubber. They haven't seen real death before in their lives and they'll be nearly useless."

Dean cringed, Corry paled Devons eyes flashed a little and Harry felt a spurt of anger flare like fire in his gut. He gripped his wand tighter.

"That leaves your team, and Philips who probably wont arrive in time to clean up nevertheless be of any help. Potter this man wants your blood and he's killed an innocent woman to get it! I want his blood, monsters like him can't stay on the streets."

Corrine gasped, "Chief there are laws like you said. I agree with you but we can't just go around killing people even if they deserve it."

"yes we can. An Auror is allowed to respond to a direct threat to his life. That man did not kill his wife just so he could shake Harry's hand and say thanks for coming he's going to try and off him and Potter I want you to beat him too it. End it and end it quick, if he gets loose we're going to loose someone in our department Donnelly's team is too green." Mr. Finnworth clarified determinedly.

Harry felt his heart stutter in his chest. He had not actually killed someone with clear intent sense the night he'd killed Voldemort. He had never wanted to take another life again. Bring men to justice yes but to ask him to go into this fight with the clear intent of murder…

"Chief that's Murder!" Dean hissed.

"Not if he attacks first then it's self defense."

"What? What if his first attack is the killing curse, is Harry supposed to just stand there?" Devon scoffed clenching his fists.

"You've been in this game for a while now Wentworth you know better, these guys always like to play cat and mouse. He's not just going give him the Avada, remember Harry's responsible for ruining his life he'll want to draw it out. You know the code Potter he touches you once and you have free license to kill."

Corrine gasped, "Wait now Harry has to let the Pyhsco score a hit!"

"I don't want there to be any doubt this is in self defense! He gives you a little zap and you end his miserable life Vontrace is…"

Harry sucked in a breath his eyes going wide as saucers the room beginning to spin and morph around him.

He was not in headquarters he was in a wood surrounded clearing and a wring of men in black cloaks and white masks stood over him. Absolute terror sang in his blood veins and Harry almost fainted.

Vontrace…Vontrace…

"_we have the Potter boy just as you asked My lord. Caught him completely unaware just like you asked."_

"_Well done Vontrace. Hello Harry, you have been a very naughty boy lately. Destroying all my horcruxes. You've been looking for me I hear? Well I decided to come to you dear boy. You see what with all your activities lately I find myself in need of more Horcruxes. Nothing would give me more pleasure then having you participate in the making of my next one…Ah don't look so frightened dear boy that particular treat won't come till later first we have to prepare you…."_

"POTTER!"

At the roaring sound of his chief's voice Harry woke from whatever nightmare had just sucked him into its depths. To his horror his body was shaking and his skin was covered in sweat. Both Dean and Devon were gripping his arms to steady him.

"Just what the bloody hell was that Potter!" Chief demanded eyeing him with caution.

A nightmare…a memory…

"Chief Harry can't…OOF" Devon sucked in a breath as Harry jammed his elbow into his rib cage.

"It was nothing I'm fine. I've been a little sick is all I wasn't paying attention." Harry hissed forcefully glaring at Devon.

He could do this, he_ had_ to do this. Donnelly's team was just getting their ears wet and a man like Vontrace would make mince meat of them.

Besides it was him that Vontrace wanted. Him he had killed his wife for, him he was willing to kill his young son and any one else who got in his way for.

He'd be damned if he let that happen.

"Well you had just better be paying attention! A rookie mistake like that could get you a one way ticket to the afterlife! I don't want to be the chief who let Harry potter get killed in the line of duty got that Potter. You watch your arse out there. Thomas and Wentworth if it looks like hero can't handle things you come in and wipe out whatever left of Vontrace clear?"

"Crystal, chief. It's clear as day you don't give a damn about Harry or…"

"Dean! While we're arguing about it that man could kill his son! We don't have time and ultimately it's my choice! He isn't forcing me to do any thing he's asking me, and I voluntarily say yes! We don't have time to hash it out, Move!" Harry interrupted his friend before he could make a vital mistake in his speech towards their boss.

"some one on this team has their head on straight. Clear out the lot of you, report back in as planned." Chief said staring pointedly at Dean.

Dean clenched his fists in frustraiton.

**Change of scene**

"So If you wanted to die Harry I could have just let the Weasleys finish you off. You could have told me and I wouldn't have wasted a good bottle of sherry over Georges head!" Dean said as soon as they Apperiated in what Aurors called the enclosure zone. Meaning a mere twenty yards out side their targets residence.

"What the bloody hell was chief thinking! He's gambling with your life. _You're _gambling with your life." Corrine hissed just as agitatedly as Dean as the five of them moved in sync towards the house on top of the hill where their enemy lie in wait.

Harry knew Donnelly's team was approaching from the south and was probably already waiting for their teams signal.

"All our lives were a gamble as soon as we signed up!" Harry pointed out tiredly. He was trying hard to keep his mind in focus but his body felt cold and craven and their was a dull throbbing in the back of his skull.

"Save it, there isn't any use hashing it now. We've got to keep him alive, code or no code if I get even an inkling he doesn't want to _play _and just wants to watch Harry die as soon as possible the Bastards down. We can argue self defense later." Devon snapped.

Harry breathed a sigh of relief as the rest of his team fell silent.

The didn't understand would never understand, and he hoped they never did. They didn't know what a monster Vontrace was.

He did….

His vision started to blur and spin again the house in front of him disappeared and the Death eaters surrounding him were laughing…

"_Tut tut Harry, begging so soon? The game is far from over, Lucius has a little score to settle you see then Vontrace…well alas Vontrace just wants to hear you scream he…_"

Harry blinked fighting the waking nightmare that threatened to swallow him whole, his body shaking like a leaf in the wind.

"Damn it Harry you cant do this!" Dean was shaking him.

Maybe Dean was right, he couldn't even move his limbs were shaking so bad the edge of his vision threatening to go black. The nightmares had never been this bad before. They had never invaded his mind while he was awake!

"You're sitting this one out Harry and that's…"

The rest of Deans declaration was drowned out by the sound of an explosion. They all turned at once to watch as the upstairs of the house seemed to bloat and pop the windows shattering and bricks flying out like missals. There were a chorus of startled screams coming form the rear of the house.

Vontrace was loose…

Harry made didn't even have to think for a moment.

"HARRY COME BACK!"


	7. Chapter 7: The rule book

Harry reached the edge of what had once been a sprawling and rather large home on a hill and what was now at best a rooftop on top of a pile of rubble. The air was so thick with dust and particles Harry could not see his own hand holding his wand raised.

He could hear though, he could hear the moans and the shouts of Donnelly's team as they called out to one another. A rookie move that could get them all killed.

Rule number one in the Auror hand book. If visibility is lost keep your mouth shut. As long as you kept zipped your enemy couldn't see you either.

Harry was hardly going to risk giving away where he was by shouting for them to stop screaming, "Here I am, follow the sound of my voice!"

He knew that somewhere behind him Dean, and the others were doing their best to follow him but he doubted they could see him in this mess. Visibility was the key issue here, Harry decided.

"Illumiclearo" He whispered under his breath giving his wand a flick. Around him the dust and smog seemed to clear as if repelled by some invisible and widening barrier, so that when Harry moved forward he could see at any time at least nine feet in front of him. Perfect. He could see but his enemies would not be able to.

Harry heard whimpering to his right, he crept in that direction and watched as the fog around him lifted to reveal a young boy sitting on a pile of upraised rubbel beneath and over hand of what used to be the roof raised above the rest of the rubble clutching his knees and weeping.

Harry halted in his tracks. Vontrace was no where to be seen but the boys seeming openness made him wary. He knew bait when he saw it.

The edge of roof the boy sat on groaned and shifted beneath him and Harry felt a jump of alarm in his chest. If the roof collapsed the boy would be buried beneath it. The groaning of unstable wood was so loud he didn't understand why the boy wasn't moving. He sighed in relief as the boy looked up and saw the predicament he was in.

He watched in terror as the boys eyes widened in fear and he began to cry harder and jerk back and forth, and that's when Harry saw that one of his legs was caught beneath a beam of wood.

Rule number two of Aurors, if your in a good position never give it away.

The roof shuddered and Harry heard cracking.

Vontrace was watching him waiting for him to reveal himself, this whole thing screamed trap.

A wail of panicked fear tore from the boys chest.

_No choice._

_Everyone has choices._

_I don't see one, MOVE!_

And Harry did, he sent up a prayer to whatever God would listen he ran forward waving his wand in a semi circle. "Wingardium Leviosa!"

He watched in satisfaction as the long broken peace of wood from the frame of the house lifted off of the boy. The boy gave a cry of pain and Harry knew it must have broken the boys leg when it fell on him. The boy tried to scramble to his feet but his leg was useless So Harry ran towards him ignoring the thumping in his heart, the cracking of the roof , and the shrill of alarm in the back of his head.

"CRUCIO!"

The curse hit him a second before hearing it cast completely registered in his brain and Harry was flying backwards fighting a scream of pain and loosing.

He heard the crashing of bricks and timber and pain lanced through his chest as he realized the roof had just collapsed.

Harry screamed fisting his hands as his head split open and unimaginable pain seared through him.

" _the Cruciatus Curse is the least of your worry's tonight Potter. I would not wear out your voice just yet we want to hear you scream for some of these others."_

The waves of pain subsided and he blinked wearily and cringed at the sight of the pale man with the oily brown hair leaning over him.

"It looks as if we meet again Mr Potter." He smirked cruelly his voice faintly accented. His teeth seemed to gleam even in the dim smoky lighting.

A wave of memories shook Harry's mind.

"_I brew this potion just for you Harry. It might let you see the world through our eyes as it were…"_

A shiver rolled down his spine as his bile rose and he felt the need to be sick. Vontrace smirked as if he knew exactly what ran through Harry's mind.

"Ah, the Illumination Potion. I see you still remember it, you need not have any fear Harry I have not had the time or the resources to brew you another one. That was his mistake you know. Lord Voldemorts mistake was in playing with you before he killed you. And he grew to confidant looking at you laying there naked as a babe on the ground covered in your own blood." Vontrace's whispery voice floated over his skin like a dangerous snake slithering in the grass.

Harry shuddered biting back a moan of terror.

Rule number three for Auror's I your enemy has you cornered don't just stand there waiting for the end.

But Harry could not make his body move, his body was frozen with fear as the nightmare jumped to the front of his mind again.

_He lay completely naked his clothing having been torn from his body at dagger point long jagged streaks where the dagger had torn his skin the only testament to his having arrived wearing them._

"Delighting in the gauges in your eyes, gashes that you put there unwilling to continue to see the horror that my little brew caused you to see. He loved to see you broken like that Harry, begging him for death."

_The blood from his torn and ravaged eyes streamed down his face and into his mouth, he had raked at them plunged his fingers into them in an effort to pluck them from his skull as visions had danced in front of them. Visions so real an manic Harry could feel and taste and touch everything in them. Every murder, every lust for blood and death in the heart of those present was illuminated and played out in front of his eyes. He couldn't watch, could not bear to see. He had made himself blind. _

_His bones had long since been brutally shattered some of them protruding from his skin in jagged peaces. He wanted to die, He tried to beg for it but the blood clogging his throat marbled his words._

"There is nothing more that I want then to repeat the process to do what he was unable. Because in the end you weren't broken Harry, he turned his back and you killed him you shouldn't have even been able to move but you rose up like some avenging angel and found the strength to kill him."

_Voldemort was laughing in cruelest victory his followers were grinning in manic delight at having used and broken what the wizarding world had named their "hope". Hope was far away. Hope was but a distant memory._

_Harry knew he was going to die his heart shuddered in his chest struggling in vein to keep beating but he knew that would not last long if he just gave up. He had driven Ginny and everyone else away to prevent them having to suffer this. To have them witness this or suffer it themselves would have killed him._

_If he died without finishing this they would suffer maybe this and more…voldemort could not be allowed to rule in tyranny over the world for one more minute…_

_He was not consciously aware of the sliding and screaming pain of bones shifting in his body that should not be. He was not aware of the mind numbing sightedness in his brain, of each wave of dizziness that threatened to send him spiraling into darkness._

_He could not even see the dark lord but he could hear._

_He lept towards the sound of that voice and felt his hands wrap around a thin column of flesh. He heard shouts and gasps and felt several burst of magic hit him._

_He was already too numb to the pain in his body to care about the added ones caused by whatever curses he had just been hit with._

_All he knew was he was holding a long column of flesh belonging to his tormentor and with fevered desperation he twisted with all the strength he possessed screaming as something hot hit him in the back sending him flying away from his tormentor._

_Harry had dug his fingers so deep into that flesh he felt blood and muscle beneath their tips and as he flew backwards the body of Lord Voldemort flew with him._

_Harry lay panting on the ground wherever the strength to strike back had come from it was gone. He lay there blood coating his hands and flesh beneath his nails… listning to the garbled gasps of a man trying to breath but blood obstructing the process._

"You were like an animal Potter, did it feel good to murder in cold blood like that. To feel him die beneath your hands to digg your hands into his throat like a beast?"

_Harry shuddered and whimpered his heart stuttering he could actually feel it slowing. Feel the coldness of death beginning to take him. The death Eaters were in a frenzy, shouting and fleeing around him they left him for dead. Harry wanted nothing more then to die, he was glad for it he ran towards it with all the strength in his heart._

"His mistake was in playing around with you like a toy, I will not be a fool like him. I'm going to Kill you Potter right here and right now.

Harry shuddard, this was so much like the last time but so different as well. He was not the same broken man, and he did not _want _ to die.

Harry Potter was trying to live.

And he was going to.

Harry fought past the clinging void of memory and leapt to his feet. To late everything was flashing green and he knew the killing curse was going to take away what ever chance he had at life.

Her face flashed in front of his eyes.

"AVADA KADAVRA"

He was never going to see her again. He was going to die with her cursing his name, never getting to hold her again with happiness between them.

Just as the green light blinded him something slammed into him sending him sprawling on his back. He felt the searing pain in his side first then the crushing weight of a a plank of heavy wood on his chest crushing his ribs.

Harry's vision went black an instant later.

**Change of Scene**

"So he just expected you to jump into his arms?" Hermione was gapping at Ginny where she sat cross legged in her chair in the chair beside Ginny. Ginny's small office space was not really even an office as a Medi-witch her desk, and supplies was really nothing more then a cubical in an entire row of them. Davey being a senior member of the Healing staff had an actual office which she sometimes envied.

And other times she didn't on days like today when Hermione would come from her job in the Ministry and Jane would come from two cubicles down and they would share a lunch break. Ginny had been telling Hermione about her odd talk with her mother this morning and Jane had demanded to know when Harry had come back into the picture and her life.

Ginny had then recalled the tail of the not so smoothly going Anniversary party for her brother. Hermione not having actually been present for the actual conversation between her and Harry was a little flabbergasted at Harry's audacity.

Ginny shrugged her blue medi-witch robes slightly stained with potion fluid from dealing with a writhing two year old before taking her lunch break. "Yeah I guess so. He told me he was sorry and that he had been stupid and that he loved me. Like that made everything Ok." She snorted rolling her eyes.

Men could be so stupid, imagine the arrogance, the NERVE!

The look in his eyes…Ginny found herself pausing her mind wistfully looking back. The way Harry had looked at her had threatened to make her act like the biggest of fools and forgive him at the drop of a hat.

It wasn't bloody fair the way he could look at a woman. He should come with a sighn.

WARNING: this man will steal your heart and forget about him giving it back.

Even if he didn't want it anymore and instead jumped between the sheets with every slimy broad who cared to crook her finger at him.

No, you would still be melting if he cast you a look that said he needed you and only you.

_But it's such a lie. He's proved that over and over._

Jane who was perched on top of Ginny's desk and was twisting one of her black curls around her pinkie stopped the distracting movement to blink at Ginny with wide hazel brown eyes.

"And you said yes right?" She asked looking at her as if Ginny had just climbed off of a space ship from mars.

Hermione swiveled around to gap at her, "Of course she didn't don't be thick." She turned back to Ginny, "You didn't did you?"

Ginny didn't know why she blushed, maybe it was because she had just caught herself wishing she had. "Of course not, I'm not daft."

"But he said he loved you?" Jane insisted eyeing her two friends in earnest as if trying to explain something to, two small children.

Ginny remembered that part all too well, her heart had jumped in her chest for joy. She had never thought to hear those words come from his mouth again. She hadn't thought she had wanted to either but it was apparent that she definitely did.

Hermione was tapping her foot in a condescending manner, "And what pray tell does that matter. He was saying he loved her the day before he broke up with her and told her she was nothing but a fling." She scoffed beginning to tap her foot angrily.

Jane opened her mouth to reply but Hermione pushed onward, " He then may I remind you told me his best friend that I was stupid and that he didn't need me. He goes off and defeats the dark lord just fine without us and comes back to soak up all his new found glory by becoming London's little play boy. "

Hermione was working herself into a real fine temper the likes of which Jane had rarely seen, "Oh he loves Gin, alright. And Whiskey and Rum and Ale and anything else he can pour down his throat. And he must love Anjie, Jackie, Ruth, Crystal…and every other sleeze that crawled their way into his bed. Harry potter does not know how to love! He doesn't love her, and he never loved me…he…"

Hermione fell to silence her lower lip trembling and her fists clenched. She grit her teeth in and effort to bite back the tears that wanted to spill. Ginny and Jane were both silent, neither having words to say. It was obvious Hermione was still hurt.

"He didn't apologize to me you know. He didn't say he was trying to protect me, just you. And instead of being open and honest about it he sneaks through backdoors to get you alone. It was probably just a slow night for him, maybe he wanted something a little challenging instead of the easy ones he usually settles for. Getting you to hop back into bed with him…"

Ginny felt for her friend, she felt the same hurt but it only went so far! "I was never in bed with him and you know it Hermione!" She defended herself.

Ginny had never even had a first time. And she wasn't ashamed of it either, she would do _that_ when she was good and ready and absolutely not throw it away until she was sure with everything in her that he was going to be her only and her forever.

Call her old fashioned but she was not going to be a goblet for any bloke to come and take a sip then walk away. It was going to mean something and it was going to last! She didn't begrudge those who had, her own principles she wouldn't force on anyone else.

_Be honest the thought of anyone touching you like that makes you gag._

_Not true sometimes you picture Harry and it doesn't seem quite so bad…._

"Fine then that's even more challenge. Getting the girl who hates you to sleep with you . He'd leave in the morning and laugh at you just like he did the last time. Laugh and mock at your feelings for him as if you were too stupid to know better!" Hermione bit out bitterly interrupting Ginny's thoughts.

"Hermione?" Jane asked softly.

"WHAT!" Hermione snapped.

"You still love him don't you. But you don't trust him so that scares you." Jane replied laying a hand on her shoulder.

Hermione shivered beneath her hand wildly shaking her head. To both her friends surprise she let out a nervous laugh, "It's not him I'm afraid of. Ron…Ron would kill us both if I forgot what he did to us. I have no reason to trust Harry and I'm not risking my relationship with Ron for a memory."

Ginny frowned and reached out to grasp her friends hands, " Ron may be angry with you for choosing to forgive Harry but he wouldn't just drop you , he loves you." She reassured her.

She saw a tear peak out of the corner of her friends eye as she whispered in a tiny voice. "Then why won't he marry me?"

Ginny felt a spark of anger, she was going to have a long hard talk with her brother about his treatment of Hermione. There was no reason to propose to her then keep her waiting for two years for no reason. It wasn't like they couldn't afford to live on their own they were already sharing an apartment and truth be told they could have afforded a house _three _years ago. Ron made up excuses but they had long since begun to wear thin.

No wonder Hermione had doubts. Ginny however knew her brother, and if she read him right he really did love Hermione and had been more then thrilled when he'd proposed rather abashedly and she had said yes. Fred and George had smirked that he should thank his lucky stars because no other girl would have.

At first he had appeared to think Yesterday was too late to get it over and done with and had been rather impatient for Hermione, her mother and his own mother to stop giggling and rehashing endless plans. Then he had been roped into actually helping plan and nothing would satisfy him. The colors weren't right, they would clash with Ginny's hair!

As if Ginny cared she wasn't the bride after all! Attention wouldn't be on her, but Ron had insisted as if this were her wedding too. Then the flowers weren't right, heavens knows why. He wanted crimson lilies and Hermione had argued that, that might clash with Ginny's hair and he had insisted it wouldn't and Mrs. Weasley had argued they were expensive and since when did Ron even _like _lilies. Then growing frustrated with the entire thing one day he had called a halt to it all saying he needed a little more breathing time. Groom nerves Mrs. Weasley had explained and Hermione had sighed but indulgently given him more time. She had been confidant then and had thought it just another one of Ron's quirks.

Two years was a long time to wait and remain completely confident.

"Hermione my brother has the brains of a well trained monkey. You can't expect too much from him. Don't worry about it, this is some kind of nerves or his usual dawdling. It only took him seven years to get the nerve to ask you out didn't it? Reason says it would take about double that many to actually get to the alter. Would you expect anything else?" She reassured her with a conspirators grin.

Hermione smiled through her tears chuckling softly, "Well you do have a point. Ron's never been speedy when it comes to dating. Unless he was trying to make me jealous he sure got quick then."

"And it meant nothing. I think with Ron the slower he goes the more he loves the person." Ginny laughed being sure to dispel any of her friends lingering doubt over whether Ron had actually had feelings for Lavender Brown.

Hermione sighed shaking her head and wiping her tears, "He's such a fool sometimes….but a loveable one all the same."

Ginny nodded glad her friends sadness was fading, "It's the only thing that keeps me from thawing him with a pan or something. I think it's a natural Survival mechanism."

All three of them chuckled over this. Ginny's laughter halted as Hermione eyed her in speculative wonder. "Ginny you're laughing with me."

"I've done that before" Ginny told her puzzled with her odd reaction.

Hermione shook her head, "I didn't even realize it till now but no you haven't. That laugh was so much different then every time before…before…"

Jane smiled triumphantly, "Before Harry came back!"

Hermione and Ginny glared at her.

She just shrugged, "Truth is truth. Gin, honey you walked in today and even though you're confused as hell he's alright pushing all the right buttons."

Ginny flushed. "He is not!"

Jane laughed tossing her hair, "Whatever. You're hot for him and you know it, you waaaaan't him." She chirped in a sing song voice that was thoroughly annoying in it's accuracy.

"The man is probably carrying oh…five or six hundred STD's. No thank you!" Ginny scoffed.

Jane shook her head, "only muggles get those. Healing potions darling healing potions." Jane laughed wiggling her eyebrows.

"the _point_ would be Harry is only looking for an easy project and Ginny isn't willing to be his next easy night!" Hermione insisted loudly drawing both their attention.

Jane shrugged, "Why not. What if he's serious, what if he's changed. A sure way to tell is to offer him a one night stand. If he turns it down then he's changed. If he takes it up and walks away you haven't lost anything you already knew he wasn't worth it."

"So why bother then?" Hermione asked.

"Because there is a one percent chance he has changed, and because Harry Potter is a dish and even if he hasn't, sleeping with him might be worth it!" Jane insisted sighing dreamily.

Hermione had stifled a laugh to try and look disencouraging, and Ginny although she rolled her eyes felt her heart speed up a little.

Some wicked voice inside her was whispering to her that Jane made sense. That even if Harry proved her right and walked away in the morning she would still know what it was like to hold him that way. To kiss him in a way that was made for love and intimacy. To have him be the first, to know what it was like with a man that she loved before she had to with Davey and…

Ginny blanched. What was she thinking. She was barely engaged a few days and she was entertaining hopping into bed with _Harry_!

Her mothers words floated through her mind.

"_Everyone else is just something to keep you busy until you have a chance to get him."_

Ginny flushed. She was not going to be that kind of girl. She had said yes to Davey and she was going to be faithful to him if it killed her. If for some reason she decided that she was a fool and going to throw herself away on Harry she would damn well break things off with him first. And since she was neither a fool nor fond of casual sex it was never going to happen!

She had just mad this solid declaration in her mind when a flurry of voices and scurrying movement outside her cubical caught her attention. Avery the head Medi-wizard in her department stuck his head around the corner.

"We just got a load of off fielders move it Weasley, Oconner!" He ordered her and Jane sharply.

As she and Jane jumped to their feet and scrambled to gather their things Hermione gave them hasty hugs and waved good bye as they scrambled out the door and after their head.

"What's the situation Avery?" Jane asked panting to catch up to him.

"Band of Aurors. House fell and killed a few, severely injured others. They're being wheeled in by the field department as we speak. Don't worry about codes grab a patient find an empty room and get to work, you know the drill." Avery hastily explained as they rounded the corner.

Ginny felt a slight spurt of alarm she was used to Aurors coming in banged up but rarely did they get an entire team like this. That hadn't been seen since the days of Voldemort.

Avery threw open the doors of a room marked "Incoming". The room beyond it was devoid of furniture but it's walls were covered in doors. One wall was covered by a huge fire place that was at all hours of the day shooting green flames. Other Medi-wizards and witches were pouring into the room just as the flames sputtered and the field team came striding out of it waving their wands to direct the people flying in on stretchers magically made to fly at a hurried and smooth pace so as not to jostle the injured persons laying on them.

Ginny rushed forward just as a familiar face leapt from the flames followed by a Medi-wizard and a stretcher.

She instantly froze recognizing Dean and the man who had helped Harry in the fight against her brothers.

Her heart began a tap dance of fear in her chest, Harry this was Harry's team.

She felt her vision swirl and her knees threaten to buckle as she recognized the pale lifeless form on the stretcher that flew in behind them.

Harry.

She didn't even think twice she was pushing through the crowd of shouting Medi-wizards and witches and she was sure she nastily elbowed someone in her effort to get to him but she didn't much care.

He was so pale, she actually felt her entire body shudder in revulsion at the thought of him being dead.

"Can you help him?" Dean was asking her fearfully he looked shaken and weary on his feet and his partner she never had got his name looked like he was about ready to fall down.

Ginny snapped out of her fear induced stupor and became all business.

"What exactly happened I need to know what his injuries are before I move him." She demanded crisply waving the field hand to follow her to and open door and into an empty room.

She immediately opened the top draw of the sterling white desk and retrieved one of the numerous blue vials of potions. She stuck a thin needle like point between Harry's lips and watched the potion drain down his throat. With her other hand she rubbed at the skin of his throat to trigger his throat to swallow.

"Whats that," Harry's other partner was asking her somewhat suspiciously.

"Revival tonic, if he's not on the verge of death it will wake him and steady his breathing. I need him awake to know how extensive the damage is to his lungs." Ginny explained distractedly. She turned to Dean, "Dean I need to know what happened!"

"I don't know what happened before we got there but when we arrived he was facing down our fugitive. And the man was about to kill him. I had to think fast I sent a plank of wood to knock him out of the way. The curse just barely missed him but he was buried beneath the plank and an peace of metal sticking up out of the rebel stabbed him in the side." Dean explained his voice wobbly as he stared down at Harry.

Ginny felt her stomach lurch but she fought down the emotional panic.

Rule number one for Medi-persons. Never operate on a person you know, emotional ties can cause unneeded panic.

"Ok, move Dean" she snapped pushing Dean roughly out of the way and going to the still open door.

"JANE!" she shouted, Jane was checking the pulse of a young man Ginny couldn't name looked up sharply at the harsh command. "I need blood cleansers, bone setters, and Skin NOW!"

Ginny swept back into the room nearly tripping over the man again. "Sir I'm going to have to ask you to leave!" She snapped impatiently.

"Devon maybe you should…" Dean started but the man named Devon interrupted him.

"What are blood cleansers, bone setters and what the damn hell are you going to do with somebody's skin."

Well blood cleansers were a special type of potion that would get rid of any type of poison or infection in the blood. If Harry had been stabbed by metal, her stomach heaved at the thought, it might have been rusty. Bone setting potion would heal any breaks in his bones which having a heavy plank of wood knock you to the ground might cause, and skin was just a medical term they used for a skin growth potion that would heal and grow back the skin that the metal had punctured and torn.

But explaining that would take more time then she was willing to give.

"Dean get him out! I need room" She ordered her friend harshly sweeping past Devon. On the bed Harry's eyes had begun to flicker open and Ginny felt joy rush through her body, so much she actually trembled with it.

Rule number three for Medi-persons always stay unemotionally attached to a patient.

"Hey, how are you feeling." She soothed him quietly brushing away his black lochs so she could see his emerald eyes glistening back at her.

Her breath caught at the utter beauty of his gaze and the coldness she saw there. She felt a sinking sense of recognition. His eyes were as cold and lifeless as they had been the day he first returned in his belated seventh year.

His eyes had not been cold as death the night before, when he had apologized and said that he loved her. How had she note noticed that then?

They were frigid now as they blinked unseeing, as he slowly came back to consciousness.

"Whats wrong with him, why does he look like that. I've never seen anything like that…" Devon was asking Dean his voice an echo of the desperation that Ginny felt.

"Harry? Where have you gone. You keep disappearing. You can come back, everything's alright." She whispered smoothing his hair back leaning over him till her lips just barely brushed his forehead.

Her heart felt to heavy to stay in her chest, it felt heavy enough to sink to the floor and make a nest for itself. She hated seeing him like this, so broken and lonely it threatened to tear her heart out while it still beat.

Harry blinked and Ginny watched in amazement as his eyes seemed to warm and life seemed to bloom back into them.

"Ginny?" Harry whispered hoarsely seeming to just recognize her.

Rule number three for a medi-person Patient Healer relationships should be strictly professional.

Ginny felt a wave of joy spread through her that she couldn't seem to resist nor stop, she pressed a heart felt kiss to his forehead having to resist the urge to fling her arms around him.

Harry's breaths were coming in struggled pants a grimace of pain on his face, she suspected his ribs were cracked or worse broken. She needed to close his wound and clean up his blood before he got sick there wasn't time for any of this but seeing him awake and aware…seeing him alive was worth any amount of wasted time.

"Everything's alright Harry. I'm going to take care of you, I promise." She promised softly her hand soflty caressing his clammy brow..

As Jane swept back into the room carrying a case full of potion bottles she heard Harry whisper.

"Did the boy…is the boy…."

She grabbed the case and moved it closer to his bed a frown on her face, "Harry what boy?" She turned back towards Dean and Devon. "What boy? What boy is he talking about."

Dean flinched eyeing Harry warily. "Does he need to be awake any longer?" He asked.

Ginny shook her head, "Now that I know what's paining him I can send him back to sleep." She nodded towards Jane who cast a sleep spell.

Almost instantly Harry's eyes fluttered closed.

"I want you to wait outside gentlemen while we work on him. When I get out there I want you to explain to me exactly how he got hurt, and what a boy has to do with it!" She commanded firmly her voice leaving no room for argument.

Both men nodded.

**Change of scene**

One hour later Ginny washed her hands of blood and her brow of sweat and left Harry's room. She headed with determination towards the waiting area.

Dean was sprawled out on a couch, and Devon was pacing like a caged tire. Seeing her both men leapt forward to attention. And demanded at once…

"How is he?"

She waved them both to silence, "He'll live but he'll have to stay here for a few days to make sure there is no infection sometimes infection gets in before the skin can re-grow. We'll give him more shots of blood cleansers. Now explain to me how this happened." She demanded her hands on her hips.

Dean looked to Devon neither man appeared ready to handle the infamous Weasley temper and Ginny looked fit to throw a fit the likes of which her mother would be proud of.

"we got a call this morning about a former death eater threatening too off his wife and little boy If Harry didn't surrender himself." Dean began.

Ginny stiffened, and Dean nodded in sympathy.

"Yeah and of course Harry couldn't say no and really we didn't think too much of it every D.E. says they are out to kill him. It was routine you know?" Devon shrugged.

Ginny paled, did they really? She had never thought of what the Death eaters reactions to Harry having destroyed their plans and their lives would be.

Of course they would seek to kill him. The thought of his constantly being in danger tore at her. Harry hadn't had any peace in his entire life had he?

"Thin our chief…that bastard pulled Harry aside and told Harry this wasn't routine at all. He wanted Harry to kill him." Dean spit the mans title out like a curse balling his fists in anger.

"But you can't, the law says he has to stand trial you can't just kill people!" Ginny insisted in horror.

"you can in self defense. The fact that Harry purposely set himself up to have to defend himself would be neither here nor there in the court." Devon sneered just as angrily.

"And Harry agreed because our usual back up team wasn't there and we were forced to use the rookie team and he knew they would and were going to be slaughterd by that man. The plan was to go in and kill him before he could harm the rookies." Dean continued.

"Except Vontrace took that option out of his hands he demolished the house in and around the rookies killing most of them. It was a war zone after that, all visibility was gone but Harry went charging in anyway. Dean and I followed using a tracking charm and we saw Harry find the mans son. The roof was about to crush him and the boys was trapped. We saw Vontrace waiting and new it was a trap. We were too far away to pick him off and if we'd shouted we'd have given away our own positions and possible have snuffed it ourselves. We'd hoped Harry would know it was a trap too and keep his clear." He continued

_Harry you stupid fool!_ She seethed to herself for she knew that even If Harry had figured out that it was a trap he would not have left a young boy to die/

_The Harry you knew before wouldn't have. That cold eyed broken shell he became would have._

Ginny felt revulsion, she wouldn't be able to stomach it if Harry had let that boy be crushed to keep himself safe. She understood it was the rational, safe and smart thing to do. Rushing into a trap would only mean his own death and he had a responsibility to himself to think of too.

But it would be a sign that the man she loved had truly died. The Harry she loved that just didn't have it in him to stand by and watch someone suffer.

It was stupid, it was maddening and gave her more cause to fear then anything else about him, but it was him and she had loved that about him.

"I guess he fell for it because he went to save the boy and before he could Vontrace sprung his trap and had him on the ground before we could even shout a warning. He…well Harry had been acting funny all day but I think he froze and that's not like him. He just lay there frozen and As we ran to get to him I thought he had died or something. Then Harry leapt to his feet and that's when Vontrace tried to kill him" Dean finished shaking his head.

Ginny nodded absolute relief washing over her, she knew Harry could see a trap when it was liad out so blatantly.

Harry had cared. He had cared more about the boys life then his own.

The boy had died and Harry had nearly died with him.

As she walked back to the room where Harry now slept a thoat flit through her mind.

_Perhapes he has changed. The monster that came back in his place might truly be gone!_

Then the soft smile of contemplation fell from her face, no he wasn't gone. Not completely when Harry had fist opend his eyes that soulless broken thing had been blinking at her chilling her just like it had the first time.

No it was not gone.

It was waiting crouched on the edges of Harry's sanity, waiting to spring forth and reclaim him.

The question was, was she going to stand back and watch it happen or do something to prevent it.

But what could she do? She was engaged to another man, trying to move on in her life. Her brothers wanted him to hang and Davey would never understand….

In the end Ginny Weasley was more like Harry then she was willing to admit.

She could not watch someone suffer and do nothing.

If Harry needed help she would help him.

_And when he's all better? Will he say thank you and walk away. Will you walk down the isle with Davey and Harry will be what._

_A friend again._

_And when he gets married?_

She felt a familiar pang of misery and jealousy in her center.

_I'd poison the bride._

_Exactly, if your going to play by his bedside be prepared to loose everything._

Harry had risked everything. Harry was always risking everything.

Last time he had lost his gamble, he had indeed lost it all.

His friends, her, and as she remembered the shell he became perhaps he was loosing even his sanity.

How do you keep a man from going crazy?


	8. Chapter 8: Exams

When Ginny finally made it back to her apartment that night, or rather early morning she was in no mood to court her older brothers, but there two of them sat on the couch in her tiny living room that served as both a hallway in-between the kitchen and bedroom and her front parlor.

Ron came to his feet as soon as he saw her and Charlie snapped to attention. His slightly freckled features were still bronzed as much as a redhead would ever be anyway, from the Brazilian sun. He had taken a bit of a leave from his work with dragons to be here for Bills anniversary and other summer events. Ginny had always been closest to him of all her brothers. Bill was wonderful in his own sort of way but as the oldest he always saw it as his duty to keep the others in line as much as possible.

Ginny had never been fond of orders, no matter how well meant and more often then not did her best to ignore her overprotective archaic sibling. Charlie was older and looked out for her but seemed to share in her delight in ribbing on Bill and the two had been close since Ginny had first been able to toddle after him on wobbly legs. This was true of Ron as well, Ron felt closer to Charlie then any of his other brothers for this very same reason. The twins were fun in their own way but weren't really great for personal talks or big brotherly hugs.

She and Ron had never been as close as she was with Charlie but that really was no fault of his. They were too close in age and tended to squabble about almost everything. Ron tried hard to match the older ones example of protecting and professing to know better then her. Ginny would take it from Bill but she was not going to let a boy born barely nine months before her prose on and on about how much _he_ knew and she didn't or dictate her behavior.

Add that onto the fact that a young Ron had not particularly liked a squirmy baby Ginny cutting in on his attention as the youngest their relation had always appeared on the outside volcanic at best.

It was astonishing that beneath all that could be such fierce family love but it was truth. She loved each one of her brothers, and was proud to say she knew how to maneuver around each one of their personalities. When she was wide eyed and alert but she had been rushing around since morning dealing with weeping wives and mothers who had lost loved ones this morning because of the attack.

Add that to dealing with surly irate patients and snappish overworked coworkers and Ginny was in no mood to do any maneuvering whatsoever. She wanted her bed for the few hours she would be allowed it.

"Hermione told us there was some big rush at St. Mungo's how are you holding up?" Charlie asked immediately coming forward to wrap her in a hug.

Ginny usually would have resisted insisting she wasn't made of glass and if a simple rush would break her she should just quite now. She was weary however and the feel of Charlie's arms wrapped around her was too good to give up even for her pride.

"Fine, the hardest part were dealing with the families a lot of them were dead on arrival and there was nothing we could do but cover them and deal with those they left behind." She mumbled into his shirt, she must really be tired because she didn't even mind the way Charlie was smoothing circles on her back like an infant.

"Wasn't anyone we know was it?" Ron asked his brow furrowing in concern.

Ginny hesitated for a split second just imagining Ron's reaction, she pushed on bravely. Oh let him react, Ron had a thunderous response for almost everything.

"Yeah it was Deans team he…"

"Bloody hell, he's ok aint the?" Ron gasped interrupting her rather rudely in his concern.

Ginny nodded and Ron breathed a sigh of relief and grimaced when she saw Charlie's eyes boring into hers. When he spoke it was soft and cool just the hint of a threat on his voice. "Potter's a member of his team isn't he?"

Ginny was about to respond when Ron jerked. "Tell me he was dead on arrival or…"

Ginny didn't know what came over her but remembering that moment when she had first seen him being wheeled in when she had thought just that brought back all the terror and revulsion of that moment.

She didn't want that, she wanted anything but Harry's death and to have him die might break her. She might hate him for what he did to her but she was beginning to believe that maybe it _truly_ had been because he cared for her. Somewhere down the line his plans had backfired because when he came back…well that she couldn't yet explain and didn't yet fully forgive.

But she did not want him to die, would not tolerate Ron treating Harry's life so carelessly.

"Shut your mouth Ronald!" She shouted shoving out of Charlie's arms, it was far past time she stood on her own.

Ron blinked at her dumbfounded for a moment and Ginny rounded on him her finger jabbing his chest like a poker. "Don't you ever say such things again you pratt! You have no idea what it's like to have to tell people they've lost their son, or their husbands. What it was like to look those women in the eye and tell them that someone they loved was never coming back. You may not like him but he doesn't deserve to die just because you don't!"

She felt on the verge of wringing her moronic brothers neck everything she had ever wanted to say to him spilling out of her on a release of tension that had been building for hours.

"You have no right! No right! No right at all to be mad at Harry for leaving me when you're no better." She yelled feeling great satisfaction in sticking her wand point into his chest to punctuate her words.

Ron's eyes had turned clouded and angry and he slapped her wand away and yelled back just as forcibly, "Don't you dare compare me to that lout! I've never lead a girl on and broken her heart. I have damn well never left her to the mercy of my enemies and not even cared enough to check up on her!"

"Oh you self-righteous little hypocrite! You have too lead a girl on and broken her heart, what was Lavender your first love? Ha! You were angry and jealous and you used her just to prove you were a man to Hermione! And you have too left a girl at her own mercy without a care for how she fares!" Ginny shot back poking him with her wand again.

Ron growled grabbing onto the tip hard enough Ginny feared it would snap, " Really when! I can't seem to remember it! When did I go trumpeting off after glory and lea-"

Ginny jerked her wand out of his grip and jabbed him again to punctuate her reply. "HERMIONE! You dunce! She's been waiting patiently for you when I would have clocked you over the head and said good riddance."

Ron turned red in the face and stammered a reply, "That's, T-that's different. I haven't left her I'm right here! She knows I love her."

"Does she?" Ginny replied hotly. "If she was putting you off for two years with only flimsy excuses would you be so sure she loved you?"

Ron had no reply and with satisfaction Ginny jabbed him again.

"STOP POKING ME WITH THAT!"

"STOP LEADING HER ON!"

"I'M NOT!"

"ENOUGH!" Charlie's shout of frustration halted Ginny in mid poke both she and Ron stared at him blinking.

"Obviously you're tired Ginny and obviously more then capable of handling your job. We just wanted to see if you were alright now that we've seen we'll go." Charlie said.

"Yeah, we we're just worried about you and a fat lot of good that-"

"Ron!" Charlie interrupted Ron's retort. Ron blushed and fell silent.

"we'll let you rest, there isn't any need to worry Harry's not your patient is he?" Charlie asked her. Ginny could tell Charlie already knew, she lifted her chin and faced his disapproval in the eye and dead on.

"Yes, he is." She replied simply unwilling to defend her actions or make excuses for them.

Ron swore and Charlie held his hand up for silence.

"Ginny I respect your brains cause I know you have them. I know you also have a heart and cant in good consciousness refuse to treat someone because of personal dislike. That's all it is Ron so keep your knickers on!" he insisted ushering Ron towards the door.

When they had left Ginny felt her anger fade and her energy drain from her body. She was too tired to even worry about changing into her night cloths she barely made it to her bed before she had fallen into it.

The last thought on her mind was the look on her brothers face if she'd told him that wasn't all it was at all.

**Change of scene**

"You look too lovely to be going to work you know." Hermione pointed out as Ginny gathered her things to go back to late that morning. Davey had called at seven her usual check in time and insisted she get some rest. His treatment of her, as if she couldn't handle the work load like any other medi-witch had grated but he had continued to insist. They had plans for later tonight and he wanted her well rested.

Unlike most mornings she had time to soak in the tub instead of a hurried shower. She had also put on make up which she rarely wore and instead of her usual '_don't want to bother with _it' pony tail. She had washed and combed her hair down her back. It was currently curling near her shoulders and admittedly it looked a whole lot glitzier then perusal.

But she was hardly _dressing up_ as Hermione seemed to be implying. Besides Hermione had not come as a friend this morning and she would not gratify her brothers curiosity by a denial that she was dressing up to impress Harry.

Whether it was true or not was of little account, there wasn't much she could do realy she was required to wear the standard robe and that was hardly glamour's. Next to Rachel Evans the last fancy piece he had dated she was a wall flower so why bother trying to impress him. She wanted to help Harry heal not end up with her heart broken again. That meant friendship, platonic and simple!

"When you have the time might as well look presentable. Besides Davey and I are having dinner with his brother and his wife tonight." Ginny shrugged Nonchalantly successfully turning Hermione's attentions away from her intention.

"Abernathy? The older one? The one who runs that potions company up in Brighton?" Hermione asked her curiosity tweaked.

Ginny checked to make sure her earrings were in right and nodded. "That's the one, I've met his little sister Melissa and his parents but never the sainted Abernathy. To here Davey talk the man invented the blood cleanser."

She and Hermione giggled over that for a moment, then Hermione asked with a raised eyebrow. "So I take it your not going to just come out and tell me why on earth when there were so many injured people you chose Harry?"

Ginny shook her head grinning slightly, "No, I love you Hermione but you're not a friend today you're a spy."

Hermione blushed looking decidedly embarrassed. "Oh alright Ron did ask me to see if I could wheedle anything out of you; but I'll have you know I told him where to stuff his shirt tails. I'm your friend first his fiancé second."

Ginny grinned maliciously unwilling to let her off the hook so freely, "Yeah but what about when you two get married. You'll be his wife first then."

"Oh you!" Hermione sighed and both women burst into giggles. When their laughter faded they both stared at their reflections in the mirror. Hermione sighed.

"As much as I don't like it I have to thank Harry. It's good to have you back Ginny I like hearing you laugh and watching you dress up to impress and to smile for no reason. I didn't realize how much I missed it until it was back." She said wistfully, then looking Ginny up and down she shook her head ruefully. "you look ready to wage battle"

Ginny arched an eyebrow, " I was actually going for pretty how on earth did I miss the mark?"

Hermione grinned, "Not wands and magic warfare. A warfare much older then all of that nonsense males invented to amuse themselves. I simply meant your waging a war of the heart and that's been going on since the first man and the first woman believe me."

"Where there are men to be fools, and women to foolishly want them there will be battle." Ginny nodded in agreement her voice a rather accurate impression of her grandmother Prewitts.

Hermione chuckled tucking a strand of Ginny's hair behind her ear. "His armor may be thick but this is a nice arsenal. You make me proud solider!" she laughed giving a mock salute.

Ginny saluted back and Hermione had to marvel that it wasn't the dab of lipstic or the flounce in her hair that made Ginny beautiful in this moment. It was the confidence, and the sparkle of anticipation.

The one question that bothered her was, who's heart was she fighting to win? She had offered Davey and the meeting with his older brother as an excuse but Hermione wasn't sure at all that was truth.

As Ginny left her apartment and headed for work, Hermione did not head back to the apartment she shared with Ron. She was headed to the burrow. She may not report back to Ron, she was not a dunce and that would be a betrayal of womanly rules.

Mrs. Weasley however was a fellow woman and would no doubly find this change in development interesting indeed. If anyone could knock a little sense into Ginny it would be her.

**CHANGE SCENE**

Harry didn't know what was worse about being trapped in an infirmary bed. The fact that he couldn't escape the knowledge that he had once again proved himself to be as an intelligent as a small child, or that he couldn't escape his Healer. The witch had introduced herself this morning as Jane and had then told him that she would be taking care of him when his regular Healer couldn't.

The woman was tall and rather willowy with curly black hair that he supposed was rather endearing. Her hazel brown eyes were alight with good humor and he supposed he would classify he slightly perked nose as cute. She looked perpetually four years old which again was rather endearing.

She had not stopped talking for hours. It seemed all she did was chatter. He had at first tried to keep up, and was astounded that Jane seemed to know more about him then he did. All the way down to his N.E.W.T. scores it seemed. A few hours ago he had given up halting the stream of chatter and questions which if he didn't answer it hardly mattered for she was already forming a new one.

"I'm not boring you Harry am I? No ones ever called me boring before. Now annoying and chatty I hear all the time but never boring. I don't think I'd like it I try really hard not to bore people you know…" Jane asked him.

The crestfallen note in her voice jerked him out of the word induced stupor his brain had slid into and he shook his head in denial tactfully trying to reassure her. She looked on the verge of tears and the last thing he wanted was to send another woman bursting into tears.

"No, miss…I mean Jane. I have a slight headache that's all. I hate sitting still for too long I tend to turn into a vegetable. I cant see why I can't be released I feel fit as a fiddle."

Jane's face lit up in a bright smile and when she laughed in a soft catty manner Harry could only blink at her in surprise. She wagged a finger at him playfully, "gallant but not always honest I think that just about sums you up Mr. Potter."

At Harry's stupefied reaction she laughed again moving around his bed in not necessarily a provocative manner but in a way that it was hard not to notice the sway of her hips. Harry was a man after all and not blind as much as he sometimes wished he was. He noted their movement with appreciation but little else.

_You're too tired to care much aren't you._

_I thought that didn't happen till you died._

_I am dead._

_Funny , what's wrong with you she's pretty._

_But she may not be interested…_

_Far more then Ginny is and just admit it that's the reason…_

He didn't realize that while he argued with himself over how little of a reaction he was having and what that meant that his eyes were glued dazedly to her form and that she might find that offensive.

"Do you want me to take a photo? It will last longer dear." Jane's voice broke him out of his own thoughts and he jerked his eyes away trying hard not to turn red and failing.

Instead of slapping him as he felt he deserved Jane laughed again shaking her head she leaned over the bed and Harry was treated to a rather embarrassing eye full. Harry kept his eyes riveted on her face as she spoke not wanting to embarrass himself or offend her again.

He briefly wondered why on earth the medi-witches gown was cut so low or if she had altered it herself, but her stream of usual chatter was back and it soon carried his thoughts away from his speculation.

"You're a peach darling a peach you know that. Philip down in magical maladies level one hasn't looked at my face in years. I like a man with a sense of decency you know. You're a decent guy Harry, I suspect you come with your fair share of idioms but your still decent." Jane concluded with a satisfied nod as if she had reached a profound conclusion about him.

_What exactly just happened here?_

_I believe you just had an exam old boy._

_What on earth was I being tested for?_

This annoying habit he had of talking to himself, even if only in his head needed to go. Not because it bothered him any but because it was depressing to think he longed for friendship so badly the dearest friend he had right now was himself.

"well my shift is almost ending the other medi-witch should be arriving shortly I will see you tomorrow evening then Mr. Potter." Jane announced gathering her supplies she came over to the bed and moved the infirmary blue blankets down to display his bare chest. She was a Healer so he didn't feel much embarrassment as her eyes raked over its expanse with a keen scrutiny.

The stab wound he'd suffered appeared to be healing nicely the skin almost completely grown over. Whether or not germs had gotten in was too soon to tell but the daily blood cleansers should help prevent infection even if they did, or so she had explained to him.

She tapped his stomach with her wand tip and Harry felt a cool shivering sensation that made him want to do something absurd like giggle. A bright smile flooded her face.

"Well you pass my tests Mr. Potter. No sign of infection, your not a sex slave as the papers claim and your actually give a damn about the less fortunate. All in all a sterling catch I'd say. Don't worry too much she'll come around in the end."

Jane's diagnosis left him blinking at her in confusion as she winked and left the room. Was he that obvious that complete strangers could read him like a book? How did she even know what was going on between he and Ginny.

_Well she does work here, and she is taking the next shift. They might just happen to know each other._

**Change of view**

Ginny hurried up the hallway heading towards Harry's room her scrolls and supplies in hand. She saw Jane close the door to his room down the hall way and begin to walk towards her. Spotting her Janes eyes lit up and she rushed forward.

"Ginny oh there you are, I was just on my way to the loo you I haven't done Harry's test exam yet." Jane informed her causally.

_You're his healer, there was no spark of excitement there!_

Why did she try so hard to lie to herself.

"Ginny I was just thinking you know since you're not interested in Harry you mind if I give him a try? I hate my hips you know their just too _there_ if you know what I mean but he seemed to like them well enough. I have to snatch those ones up while I can they are too few." Jane asked her happily.

Ginny felt an instant spurt of hot denial that was riding on the raging stallion known as jealousy. The thought of Jane of all people being that faceless woman he married made her want to make Jane _truly_ faceless. Then her words caught up with her mind.

"He what?" She asked

Jane shrugged a small growing grin on her lips. "Likes a good sway what man doesn't. Anyway I'll be right back to do his chest exam…"

"NO!" She nearly shouted." I mean no need. Ahem what I mean is as long as I'm taking the shift I might as well. No need for you to come all the way back" Ginny blushed.

Jane grinned nodding "Well then my work is definitely done here for the day. Enjoy yourself darling."

**Change of view.**

_Ok all you have to do is brace yourself. She'll be a little cold and probably a lot less gentle then Jane was but that's to be expected._

_If I were her I'd infect you on purpose._

_Yeah I know so It's good I'm not, this savage want you have to die needs to end._

_Well unless the pattern of my life drastically changes its to die I'll be wanting._

_I thought you wanted her…_

_Well I do but I'm not stupid she doesn't want me and icy glares and polite smiles isn't much to hang on for._

_What are you hanging on for?_

A dream and nothing more. Less then four weeks of my his life in which he had spent in something so rare to Harry potters life. Happiness. And when it had all fallen apart it had indeed seemed like something out of a dream. Somebody else's life.

Her tears and her indifference to him was just part of the nightmare that was his life, he lived in the night mare but lived for the dream.

_Poetic but unrealistic. The dream is gone and you're cracking mate, dreams don't keep you sane._

_Well they can drive you insane so why not?_

Harry's continued argument with himself was interrupted by the door opening, and…

Venus walked in. He had seen women in glittering dress robes, their faces caked in beauty creams. Beauty enhancement potions making their faces radiant and leak sexual charms, he had seen all types of elegance and beauty.

He choked on his own air for no reason other then his chest seemed to tighten and clench at the sight of her clean fresh looking face that bore just a tiny hint of makeup. His eyes roamed her features with an eagerness he couldn't seem to help. Her medi-robes were in not exactly form fitting but they didn't hide her curves either and Harry found his eyes glued to her hips as she walked towards him.

_Ahh so your not dead after all._

_I wish I was she's killing me._

**Change of view**

Satisfaction was a beautiful, heady and dangerous thing. She was utterly and completely satisfied, like a cat in the crème with the way his eyes roamed over her. She was tempted to slow her pace and torment him a little and that kind of thought had never entered her mind before.

_Then why did you come in here swaying for all you were worth._

_Well he eyed Jane so it doesn't mean anything._

_Obviously it does or you wouldn't have felt the need to one up her._

_I did not…_

_Lie to everyone else but not to yourself._

Well whatever her reasons for suddenly swishing her way into a room instead of her usually lopping pace she was satisfied with the results. Very satisfied indeed.

"Morning Harry, first off I need to check your wound for infection then I can give you blood cleansers"

**Change of view**

His tongue felt too thick in his mouth to form a reply.

_Aren't we telling her Jane already did it?_

_Not a chance._

Not much of an argument there, call him selfish perverted or a complete dog but if Ginny wanted to examine his chest she could examine away he was not going to stop her.

A moment later he realized what a mistake that was. As Ginny peeled back the blankets and her eyes raked over his skin this was so unlike Jane's perusal of him that he marveled at the difference.

The difference was Jane didn't bring Goosebumps to his flesh, that Jane could sway all she liked and he wouldn't stop breathing, Jane's eyes didn't turn molten as they slowly slid over him.

He felt the tap of her wand on his bare skin and felt it actually twinge a little. He was fighting not to gasp for air unable to tear his eyes from hers. He waited for the smile and the announcement that there was no infection.

Instead Ginny frowned and tapped again.

"Hmmm, I'm not quite sure its infection but there's some type of residue in your bloodstream." She murmured.

Harry was about to deny the fact, having just had a clean bill of health from Jane but he actually bit his tongue, could taste the blood in his mouth from the nip of his teeth as she spread on hand over his abdomen.

Her face was scarlet and her hand was shaking a little but she tapped him with her wand again and this time the sensation wasn't cool. It was hot and Harry really didn't appreciate that at this moment.

Her hand smoother circle patters over his skin, so soft and gentle it was almost a caress. Almost nothing, it was a caress it was the gentlest thing she'd done to him in seven years. Their eyes caught and Harry drowned again and again in hers.

"Harry, I want…" Ginny's voice cracked and faltered.

Her he wanted her more then anything but now was hardly the time to say that. It was hard to think with his brain cells leaving his brain and fleeing to other places.

_Well think! She already thinks you're a sexual addict if you're going to proove her wrong don't act like it._

Harry struggled to form coherent thoughts as her hands continued to dance over his skin. Ginny raised her head almost shyly that blush still burning her cheeks.

"To call a truce, I don't understand all of what you did and it still hurts but it only hurts more not to work at healing. Holding on to bitterness and resentment is not what either of us wants, right?

What either of them wanted? What did they both want.

Her hands were dancing and smoothing his skin, her embarrassed half smile was slight but more beautiful then anything he had ever beheld. The desire to kiss her in this moment was altogether too much for him to resist.

He might have made such a vital error if it had not been for the nock on the door and its opening in that exact moment.

Both of them turned to stare as George strode into the room. He stopped in his tracks eyeing the two of them speculatively. Harry groaned, why did it always happen at the worst moments.

"Well…Mum sent me to invite you home for you're lunch break." George began lamely.

Ginny didn't snatch her hand from his chest as Harry would have done but seemed to absently continue her ministrations.

"That's great George tell her I'll be right along." Ginny nodded at him.

Harry's eyes and Georges were glued to the tapping of her wand and the movement of her hand.

"Just what exactly are you doing little sister?" George finally asked his teeth clenching a little.

"Oh" Ginny started finally removing her hand and turning an even brighter red. "There was residue in his blood so to examine it and break it down we send a spell into the skin and wherever the residue is well… we can feel it. Except it wasn't from germs it turned out to be magical."

Georges eyes flared and he took a threatening step forward and Ginny halted him with a terse set down, "Oh calm down George Harry doesn't have a wand he couldn't have purposely put it there."

He couldn't of so how had it….

Jane, Jane had "checked" him before.

What on earth was that woman's game?


	9. Chapter 9:A merry Tangle

Charlie Weasley was just walking up the drive to the burrow having gotten the vegetables out of his mothers garden as she had asked when there was a loud bang like a gun backfiring and Fred and George appeared in front of him.

Charlie was used to them popping in front of him at a moments notice but usually they sat back to enjoy the look of utter surprise on their victims face and to laugh as they jumped and spilled whatever they were carrying or tripped over something.

So all though he did flinch a little it wasn't their sudden appearance that made him drop the basket of garden vegetables in shock or curse as he tripped over Fred's foot and went sprawling onto the ground. No it was the way both of them grabbed onto his arms jerking him forward and screaming something incoherent.

Having just eaten a face full of dirt Charlie was not in the happiest of moods when instead of apologizing both of them grabbed onto the back of his head pulling hard and continued to scream like jungle monkeys.

Charlie was sure he was going to be killed here in the Garden and he had no idea what he had done too have his brothers turn on him, perhaps it was rabies, yes Fred was frothing at the mouth a little as he screeched.

He wasn't able to make much sense of it, all he knew was his head was being forced into the dirt again as both of them swarmed over him like a parasite.

"Jerk….blighter….should have hexed….Ginny…Sex….Harry! And you said it was…Kill you first!"

Three words in their marbled speech caught his attention. Ginny, sex, and Harry. Three words that in no way belonged in the same sentence.

"ENOUGH! GET OFF!" He shouted shoving hard pushing one of them he couldn't tell which at the moment off of him. Their was a grunt from the other as his foot connected with his shin.

Free of their choke hold on him he righted himself and spat out the dirt clogging his mouth. He glared at them both in no way amused at this turn of events.

"Bloody hell! Are you mad?" He demanded clamoring to his feet.

The twins did the same staring at him with mirrored dislike. "One question Charlie did you or did you not tell Ginny you trusted her with Harry."

Light began to dawn and Charlie felt a little more understanding to their sudden attack, not by much but some understanding at least.

"Yes I did because I do. Ginny's got a head on her shoulders a brain up there, I trust her to use it." He assured them brushing off his robes.

The back door swung open and in the door way stood Clarita his wife of four years, their one year old carrot headed daughter on her hip. "Charlie! What are you doing out here Mum and I need those vegetables if dinner is going to be on time." She reprimanded him softly.

Charlie smiled at her distractedly, "Be there in a minute darling," He turned back to his brothers. "Next time you want to start trouble do it like men and give me fair warning I'll show you who's still head of this family." He hissed.

Fred and George appeared slightly apprehensive, in the pecking order of the Weasley children they were not last but certainly not first. Bill and Charlie had been know to put them in their place a few times.

"If we did that we'd loose, and we're going to win hand Clarita the veggies and get back here and face us." Fred replied.

Charlie had turned and begun to pick up the scattered vegetables but he stiffened at this cheeky statement. He turned and glared at them, "What was that squirt. Don't think your too big to end up hanging by your boxers!"

George blanched but his twin pressed on, "Go ahead and do it you traitor but I'll challenge you again and again until I make a widow of Clarita. You won't live long enough to see your next Niece or Nephew."

Charlie's anger turned to confusion, "What are you blabbing on about, none of your wives are pregnant."

"Not yet but Ginny might be!" Fred spat.

Charlie's whole world came to a grinding screeching halt. "WHAT?"

"Now Fred don't count your chickens before they've hatched." George cautioned.

Fred slapped his hand away, "That the point I don't want any chicks! I don't want any eggs either!"

"Well she comes with eggs therefore…" George began but Charlie interrupted him,

"Davey Got Ginny Pregnant! That Blighter! He's damn lucky their getting married. He's going to marry her alright! Yesterday!" Charlie seethed thinking of all the ways he could maim a man without technically assaulting him.

"Wrong bloke Charlie, try the rat." Fred responded to his anger in a dry tone.

Charlie actually felt his windpipe close as he barely managed to squeak. "Harry?"

When Fred nodded George sighed exasperated, "Now wait a minute, we don't know that. Blimy Fred we don't even know if they've slept together."

"Oh rubbish George and you know it! You told me you walked in with her all over him." Fred turned on his twin.

"Well yes she was, but she said it was purely for healing." George defended their absent sister.

"Oh balderdash! Madam Pomfery never took off my shirt and gave me a chest massage!" Fred scoffed.

Neither of them seemed to notice Charlie hyperventilating behind them his fist clenching and unclenching.

"Look I'm as skeptical as you are but just because she was giving him a little rub doesn't mean they've been sleeping together. He's only been around for a few days." George insisted.

"It only takes a second to get the job done!" Fred insisted just as fervently.

"Oh really? Then give Angelina my condolences because that's just unkind!" George tired of his twins unwillingness to reason shot back.

Fred turned bright red and looked like he was about to throw a punch, George stepped hastily back fending him off. "I'm sorry I'm sorry that's not what you meant I know!"

"This isn't a time to shield her George. Ginny's too gentle, too innocent to do that unless that bastard was seducing her! I'm telling her if she isn't bedded and pregnant she will be by tomorrow if we don't _kill_ that man!"

"I AGREE" Charlie finally managed to speak the Vegetables he had picked up had been crushed in his hands. His shout was so loud both men jumped and glanced back at him warily.

Then Fred's eyes narrowed, "Oh yeah I forgot. You're the chump who told her it was ok to get near him."

"CHARLIE WEASLY DON'T YOU IGNORE ME!"

All there of them jumped and turned guilty towards Clarita who had been trying to get her husbands attention for sometime now.

"I wasn't ignoring you dear" He reassured her, reaching for their daughter sheepishly.

Clarita swatted his arm and not altogether playfully, "don't lie to me either. What on earth is going on out here?"

"Nothing, don't worry we'll settle it." he assured her kissing her cheek but she didn't look mollified in the least.

" really well while your beating each other up over nothing Ginny and her young man are starving." Clarita reprimanded him her chestnut ringlets seeming to bounce with her ire. He usually found that irresistibly adorable in a way his brothers liked to rib him about.

But her words were enough to distract him from her charms. "Her what? Davey?" He asked hopefully. From near pregnancies to maybe just healing and back Charlie's head was pounding and he hoped against hope that Ginny's young man was Davey.

"Your mum sent George to Ginny with a message inviting her to lunch for lunch break. Ginny just sent an owl asking if she could prepare a meal for her and Harry. Your mum and I can't do that without vegetables and here you are brawling like a child." Although her words were scornful she was shaking her head fondly at him and gentle brushing the dirt off his robes.

He felt a brief glow of warmth at her touch but struggled to keep his objective. "Since when does she have lunch with Harry!"

Clarita smiled at him a knowing glint in her eyes, "Since she decided to stop pretending she hates him. Honestly Charlie I don't think she ever did. I think she only pretended to for your sake. She does love all of you and with all of you telling her to dislike him I don't blame her. For the life of me I can't figure out why you don't. He's as much a part of this family as I am you know."

That was true, Charlie had not known Harry as well as Bill or the twins or Ron had on account of his work with Dragons but Harry had been a part of his family since the first day Ron had met him. He had been worming his way into his mother and sisters affection only a year after that and he'd even won over the twins. Bill had respected him and liked his guts and his cheek. Charlie the few times he had been with him as a student had liked those things about him as well.

He had both liked and disliked the way the young mans eyes lingered on his sister. The dislike was not really Harry's fault he intensely disliked anyone who looked at Ginny too long in those days. Well it was only a little bit, most of him was amused by it for he already knew Ginny's choice. Harry, it had always been and as Clarita confirmed his deepest fear the one he had for seven years not dared to acknowledge.

He always would be.

Charlie sighed feeling dread steel over him. She was going to get hurt, he couldn't bear to see her hurt the way she was last time. How was he supposed to forgive that? How dare anyone even ask him too!

"We have every right to hate him. Why can't she, why can't she just make things easier and hate him!" he sighed again hugging his wife to him.

He felt Clarita rub soothingly at his back. "Because she loves him. He may have hurt her but it's really hard to hate someone you love. People can look like they do but if you look deep enough more often then not that hate is just hurt."

"Exactly he hurt her once! He'll do it again." Charlie insisted.

"But that's her risk to take not yours. All you can do is be ready to catch her if he drops her. If it makes you feel better I don't think he will. I think that boy has suffered enough and is finally ready to know what it's like to love and to be healed by it."

His wife was beautiful and wise and he loved her, he hoped she was right.

**Change of scene**

"So what did you do after that?" Ginny was laughing where she sat perched on the edge of Harry's infirmary bed. The basket of food her mother had sent over lay on a table erect beside his bed. It's contents having already been mostly emptied and devoured by Harry.

He still ate like he would never eat again, Ginny mused fondly watching him finish a bowl of her mothers stew. She liked the way Harry's cheeks turned pink as he came to a point in his story that obviously embarrassed him.

"I ran, that girl was scary beyond reasoning. Do you know how determined she was! It was something out of a horror novel." Harry shuddered. The Memory of Romilda Vane something obviously better forgotten.

Ginny had always thought Romilda silly in the extreme in her obvious pursuit of Harry. She had always thought there was no better way to get Harry to run then to boldly peruse him when he was uninterested. She had learned from her mistake when she had given him that silly singing valentine and embarrassed both of them.

"you were always a little uncomfortable around females, perhaps it was just you." She teased him delighting in the merriment dancing in his green eyes.

Harry shook his head a slight grin playing on his lips, "I'll admit it I wasn't the smoothest bloke around but it was definitely her. She tried to corner me once, and I mean she charged at me like a bull."

Ginny couldn't help laughing at the suddenly green look to his face and Harry didn't appear to find anything funny about the situation.

"It wasn't funny!" he insisted. "Don't you remember she actually gave me love potion tainted chocolate. Do you know how close I came to being at that beastly girls mercy."

Ginny grinned at him leaning forward to tease him, "Yes just think Harry you might have been her sweetheart until you graduated. Then you'd have married her, this very day you might be the father of three or four little Romilda's."

Harry laughed tossing a grape from the basket at her, "Well thank you for cheering me up. I was getting a little down about my life lately but you've just convinced me this is heaven."

Ginny watched him laugh her own smile wide and glowing on her face. He was beautiful when he laughed, he inspired her to laugh with him. She coveted his smile like a treasure, it was a crime for him ever to frown she decided. To rob the world of the beauty of his merriment was surely against some law.

_You are really hooked aren't you. You're babbling like a love sick ninny._

Perhaps she was, whatever she was she was more then happy that right now Harry seemed carefree and lighthearted. At first things had been strained, it was one thing to call a truce it was quite another to get past the awkwardness of having nothing to say to each other anymore.

Then rather desperate to make conversation Harry had asked her how she had met Jane and they had begun to find it easier to talk. Each moment that passed by it was like they had never parted, it was reminiscent of those days by the lake when she had lain in his lap his legs cradling her torso her head rested on his chest.

They had talked, and well sometimes they had expressed their emotion in other ways. Delightful ways that had set her heart racing and her blood running wild and free in her veins.

She had been so happy then.

She was happy now watching him laugh, perched on his bed. She had the urge to crawl into the shelter of his arms like she had done in their youth and just lay there.

To laugh and talk and forget the world around them. It was such a simple desire but one she couldn't indulge in.

"Have I a clean bill of health then?" Harry asked her.

Ginny nodded. "Yes I'll have Jane run one more exam when she gets back on shift and if it's clear you'll be free to go. Where will you go?"

She realized she had no idea where Harry lived, and other then what he did for a living what he liked to do in his spare time, what his favorite foods were. They could have changed in the time they had been apart. Seven years was a long time.

"Back to my apartment. I was staying with Remus and Tonks for a good while but about four years ago I finally moved out and got a place of my own." Harry explained reaching up to pour himself a glass of pumpkin juice from the area of food on the table.

As he moved his muscles moved beneath his shirt, he had insisted on putting one on after his chest exam that morning blushing rather furiously as he put it on. Ginny could only shake her head. How could a man with so much experience as she happened to know he had, be so shy?

He had not been shy in their seventh year, gluttony was a more adequate description when it came to women. She felt a slight stab of pain at that remembered feeling. Her seventeen year old self had been ill prepared to watch and suffer for his mistakes.

"What did I do now, you're upset I can see it?" Harry sighed and Ginny noted that he looked as if the world was about to end.

She reached out and clasped his hand giving it a reassuring squeeze. "No, well it's nothing you did now anyway. Just memories."

His eyes bore into hers and he closed his eyes for a moment. When they opened Ginny fell a jolt of something unnamable hit her stomach and flutter there like some wild winged bird.

"Ginny I know it won't make up for it but I needed warmth so badly back then. I was…well I can't really explain the feeling of it but it was terrible and it was empty and I wanted to be close to someone to be connected." He began softly his eyes still holding hers that fierce emotion swirling in their depths.

She couldn't of looked away if Voldemort himself had strolled into the room and tapped danced.

"I was there, I wanted to be there for you Harry. I offered everything to you." Her voice was a breathy whisper that she didn't even recognize as her own.

"I know you did. I don't know how else to explain it but I was living a nightmare and the only thing I could feel was continued misery and I didn't want that to touch you. Sometimes I would lay awake at night and wish some of your warmth would reach me and maybe if I crept into your room you might offer it. I disgusted myself, I would have destroyed us both if I had acted on what I wanted. So I took it from wherever I could get it but it was never what I wanted or what I needed and the nightmare just got worse. I wouldn't do anything differently I wasn't fit to except anything from you back then especially not that." Harry responded softly.

Ginny was trembling. One of his fingers was softly drawing a line on her cheek almost as if he didn't notice he was doing it. His eyes were locked with hers and she read her own longing her own hope written there.

Would she have? If Harry had come to her needing warmth and solace would she have given something she prized something she was holding for one man and one man only and had vowed not to give until she was sure and not a moment before?

She had been seventeen, reckless and in love, she might very well have. Might have nothing, she _would _have. He was making her breathless _now_, and she was a grown woman. And he was right it would have been a mistake, he had been to wild and too dark he still would have ended up hurting her, only more so.

Then realization sunk in she felt her breath hitch. Harry had known, he had not come to her because he had known and he hadn't _wanted _to hurt her. Then why had he, she was grateful he had cared enough not to indulge in his needs without considering her but he had still dealt her heavy blows without having to sleep with her.

"You kept trying to reach me." Harry answered as if reading her mind. "And the more I hurt the more I drank and the less I cared about what was best for you. As long as you kept trying to comfort and hold me I was weakening. On night I actually waited in a corridor waiting for you to head towards the common room and for bed intent on cornering you. Intent on seeing if you could do what drink and all those other girls couldn't. I caught myself in time, and condemned myself for better off dead. I decided that death was what I wanted most so I went to the tower."

The truth dawned on her, "And I followed you. So you made sure to push me away for good. You didn't jump, why didn't you jump?"

Harry's finger had traced a line to her upper lip and began to trace its curves. She felt her lips trembling as he leaned closer to her as If drawing nearer to her like a moth to flame.

"I heard you coming and I just couldn't. As long as you were still there something in me just wouldn't do what my entire body begged. I hated myself for being so weak, but I couldn't not if you were coming towards me and I had a chance to turn around and see you."

He shouldn't say such things. Ginny closed her eyes tight against the tears wanting to spill.

A woman could loose her heart over such words.

_You already have._

_No, It would be a mistake he isn't stable. He's proved that already he's warm and smiling now but you saw how he woke after his injury. He's far from stable._

The scary thing was she was finding it harder and harder to care.

"Knock knock!" A voice hissed form behind them. Ginny jerked away from Harry's touch and darted off the bed guiltily and winced seeing Charlie leaning against the door. Just what she need, did they have to hover like this?

"Charlie I love you, but you don't work here! I don't understand how you get passed all of our security and feel you have the right to interrupt me while I work." She berated him fussing with the basket beginning to put things away to distract herself and hide her trembling limbs.

"You're my sister security always assumes I have your clearance and I know you won't tell them otherwise you love me too much." he turned to Harry his voice barely civil. "Evening Potter."

Harry for his part sounded a lot more cordial then Charlie, "Evening Charlie."

Charlie's eyes glinted steel for a moment, "I prefer you use my last name."

The silence that followed was pregnant and cold and Ginny felt her hard one truce slipping away. She turned on Charlie, "If you're going to be that way Charlie just leave!"

"Listen sis, you may want to risk it all on him and I'm not going to tell you no. I don't think I could stop you if I tried but I'll be damned before I give him an edge. Until he proves otherwise he can just…"

"Since when Charlie do I have to prove anything to you?" Harry's soft inquiry startled both of them so much she and Charlie stared at him with wide eyes.

"Are you daft Potter? Are you being funny?" Charlie asked disbelieving Harry's nerve.

"Not at all. The way I see it I owe Ginny proof, I owe Ron and I owe Hermione maybe even your parents for leaving without even a word of thanks. I don't blame your mistrust in me but you didn't really know me then and you bloody hell don't know anything about me now. So I don't owe you anything. I think if Ginny wants to give it a try she would know a whole lot better then you would. After all it's her I owe, not you!" Harry clarified softly.

For all their softness his words were clear and firm, Harry unlike her brothers didn't need to shout to be heard.

Ginny flinched, Harry's cheek could be met with one of two reactions from her brother the usual explosive anger or admiration. Her brothers liked a man who could give as good as he got. They were sure to _give _a lot.

Ginny waited and sighed with relief when Charlie didn't snarl and go for Harry's throat. He was stiff as a board though and his reply was even stiffer. "You may not owe me anything but regardless, if you hurt her again I'll tear your throat out and that's a promise Potter."

Harry only nodded his lips grim, "understood, Weasley."

"Well isn't this a happy little picture. Hi there cousin!" A voice chirped happily from behind them. Ginny was relived as the tension left the room. Jane waltzed in giving Charlie a hug and Charlie gave her his usual bear hug.

After he had set her down Jane shook her head at him, "Still being an ogar I see. It's why I wouldn't marry you, you know. I'd have had to kill you to escape within the first month." she laughed winking at Ginny.

Jane had been dating Charlie for quiet some time before he started dating her cousin Clarita. It had been Jane who introduced the two. Jane had confided in Ginny that she had been wanting to back out of things for a while and knowing her cousin had a thing for him had urged their union. Ginny was glad for her insight Charlie was happy with Clarita and their love for each other was obvious.

Charlie was shaking his head grinning ruefully, "I thought it was because the thought of trailing behind watching me play with dragons gave you hives?"

Jane laughed, "Well that too but mostly because you're still a caveman. Women can handle their own lives you know. We're big girls you don't have to hold our hands. How Clarita stands it amazes me."

Ginny laughed slinging her arm around Janes waist seeing Harry's confused expression. She gestured towards Jane. "Janes cousin Clarita married Charlie about four years ago. They were dating before that and because our Jane is such a doll they're still very good friends." she explained.

"Oh please, It's my Scottish charm nothing more nothing less." Jane said flippantly purposely thickening her voice with a lilting brogue. Jane was second generation her parents having come directly from Scotland. Clarita's branch of their family had been natives of England for some generations.

"Charm? It wasn't charming what you did this morning I hope you know I figured it out" Ginny hissed pinching her friend.

Jane just grinned passed the slight pain, "You can thank me later." She turned to Harry. "You are aware Mr. Potter you'll need some one to accompany you home after you check out have you got someone who would come?"

Harry opened his mouth to respond but Jane pressed on, "No? that's too bad Ginny you wouldn't mind escorting Harry home would you?"

Charlie's eyes narrowed, "She has a date with Davey tonight."

Jane turned to face him her eyes dancing with challenge. "Oh? Well good thing I didn't schedule his chest exam until the end of my shift I think eleven is long enough for them to finish eating don't you cousin dearest?"

Charlie grit his teeth, "oh and I'm sure you'll be so busy that you couldn't possibly do it sooner?"

Jane grinned wickedly, "Of course. I'm swamped Charlie dearest just swamped!"

Ginny had to muffle a giggle knowing Charlie wouldn't appreciate that. "It's ok Charlie Davey and I should be home long before eleven four hours is a long time to eat. I'll take you home Harry it's no trouble."

Harry opened his mouth, "If Dean or Seamus cant then.." His protest was cut short by Jane as she sighed dramatically rushing forward to clasp his hands in hers.

"Then that's just no problem because our Ginny will do it! She'll walk you to your apartment and it will be late Charlie and Ginny has work so she won't linger will you Ginny dear?" Jane asked Ginny an eyebrow arched.

Ginny shook her head fighting back a grin. Both women looked somber as she replied, "I wouldn't even dream of it."

Charlie threw up his hands, "Well obviously I don't have much say."

"Of course you don't cousin. Whatever made you think you did? Oh Ginny isn't that just darling he thought he could stop you from going your just a big strong cuddly little mess!" Jane giggled throwing her arms around him.

Charlie reluctantly grinned and hugged her back. "You're an imp!"

"Yes but you love me. I know exactly what I'm doing here cousin you just leave it to me." Jane patted his cheek.

"We are still in the room aren't we Ginny?" Harry asked rolling his eyes.

Ginny laughed, "Apparently not."

"Oh you just hush, it's my shift and you have a date to get ready for. Don't forget to pick up Harry on your way back." Jane admonished.

Harry and Charlie both sighed in unison and spoke at the exact same moment,

"Does anyone care what I have to say about this?"

Charlie started his eyes widening a little as he glanced at Harry.

"No!" Jane replied simply.

Harry sighed and glanced at Charlie, a small grin escaped the older man and for a moment they shared something.

Despite himself Harry felt hope beginning to worm its way into his heart.


	10. Chapter 10: Meetings

"We sent you to stop her and you come back and tell us that she's WHAT?" Fred demanded pacing the living room of Ron's apartment. It was six o'clock in the evening that very same night and Charlie would rather have been anywhere else. Like with his wife and daughter for instance, he knew he was likely to catch hell from Clarita when he got home his quick visit to Diagon alley having now extended for several hours. Never mind that he had lied to her and she seemed to have an uncanny ability to catch him at it when he did.

However he understood the importance of such a meeting the Weasley men had not had a full gathering since 'The Percy Problem', it was generally saved for disasters in the family in which the men felt the women were better left in the dark. Not that they did not value their women's opinions usually Charlie respected his wife's view over anyone else's. There were just things however that women would never understand. Men things.

Fred was pacing, George was pacing with him mirrored dislike of the notion of Ginny going alone to Harry's apartment on his face. Ron was leaning against the couch his legs crossed at the ankles looking quietly thunderous. Bill and Dad were sitting looking slightly calmer then the rest and Percy whom had been forced to floo in from the Americas were he had been visiting his wife Penelope's cousins to attend the meeting was looking disdainful at the entire process.

Dean and however looked the most uncomfortable, after a general vote the men had agreed that Dean had to be present. He worked with Harry on a daily basis and if Harry had been crowing about finding an easy conquest in their sister he would know. He would also be able to warn Harry off in a way that he might listen. He obviously didn't think bodily harm was much of a deterrent.

Charlie sighed and tried to explain again. "I tried to stop her I reminded her she had a date tonight hoping that a mention of her **fiancé** would remind her being in an old flames apartment was probably not the best idea. Heaven knows I tried but Jane…"

Bill let out a bark of laughter slapping his knee, "Jane? I should have known she had something to do with this. Charlie it's a shame you didn't marry that girl she keeps you on your toes."

Charlie scowled, "You'd have to put me away for murder after the first year she drives me crazy."

Fred nodded, "Charlie's right Jane needs a leash or something!"

Ron scoffed tossing a glance at Fred. "Who are you and what have you done with terrible twin number one? You _love _Jane and her antics. You're always encouraging her and when they were dating you did everything possible to help her drive him loony."

Fred crossed his arms looking mulish, "Not when those antics could harm Ginny."

To this there were general nods and grunts of agreement. Dean however leapt to Harry's defense. "Harry isn't like that he wouldn't take advantage of her just because she's alone with him."

Their were snorts of mirth and general disbelief Ron stuck up his hands and began to tick off names, "Rachel, Christina, Bethany, Hanna, Merrill, need I go on?"

"That was before he became and Auror, in the four years he's been on my team I don't think I've ever seen him take a girl back to his place. He has girlfriends but their casual and their far apart. Just like any bloke his age. And that's not even lately, for the last year he's been single and seems determined to stay that way. Corry our other partner keeps trying to hook him up but he's having none of it." Dean insisted.

This was met with grudging silence, Dean wouldn't lie for Harry and the image he just painted warred with the one of the fast playboy they would all like to paint onto Harry.

"Alright so he's stopped playing it fast and fancy but he's still a drunkard…" Bill began but Dean was shaking his head.

"No that's not true either. If you'd listen to Harry when he talked instead of hitting him till he cant. And mind you if you answered Remus letters instead of burning them because he supported Harry you'd know that Harry hasn't been a drunkard for five and a half years now. He can take a few drinks like any other bloke but he doesn't indulge in excess anymore."

Charlie had to hide a grin, his brothers did not look thrilled at this news. They looked angry that Harry was robbing them of reasons to dislike his pursuit of their sister.

Percy was glancing thoughtfully around at all of them he raised his hand as if he was in a class room and Ron rolled his eyes. "yes Percy do you have something to say?"

"Why yes I do Ronald thank you for noticing. It seems to me the only problem we have on our hands is Ginny herself. Now she's young and it's sometimes hard to separate yourself from a first love. Such foolishness however could ruin her entirely in this case. I know Davey and I'm sure if we tell him exactly what's going on he'll put a leash on the entire matter." He replied tapping his wand to accent his words.

Silence.

"Why George I think he's got it!" Fred exclaimed happily.

"Not a bad idea Percy it's only right her fiancé be warned an old fame is sniffing around her." Bill was nodding.

"Wait wait hold your hippogriffs doesn't that seem underhanded to any of you?" Charlie sat up in his seat.

"No, if one of Clarita's old boyfriends was sniffing her out wouldn't you want the heads up old chap?" Bill asked him.

Damn, that was true he would. Not that he didn't trust his wife there were just things a man wanted to know about.

"Yes I would," he admitted grudgingly "But I also wouldn't go charging in like a troll in a teashop I'd let her deal with it because I trust her. I believe in our commitment and he could try all he wanted and I'd trust her even then!"

Bill grinned at him reading his obvious hesitancy. Of all his brothers he'd always been closest to Bill naturally because of their closeness in age.

"You're not switching sides are you old chap?" Bill grinned.

Was he? He in no way approved of Harry's actions in the past and if that was all he ever had to go on he'd lock Ginny up before he allowed her to walk down the isle with him.

But that wasn't all he had to go on. He had the years before Harry's darkness and these year after it's passing. As hard as he tried he could not see a bad man in Harry. He saw a troubled one, one that needed and hurt like everyone else. A man who had made mistakes but a Goodman nonetheless. He was a national hero the savior of the entire wizarding world when Charlie thought on what all of that meant what Harry could have asked for what he could get away with . Harry could have the entire world presented to him on a silver platter if he asked, could have strings of women any job he wanted he could have even shot for minister and the people would have carried him into office.

Harry was simply an Auror and not even the head of his team. He lived in a simple apartment all his money in the bank increasing by the year but unused. He dated sporadically and lately not at all. All marks of a man who was not a glory seeking arrogant pratt as Ron had so often named him.

There was also the fact that Harry for all accounts had not appeared to want Ginny to walk alone with him to his apartment. That had been clear between the two of them back in the hospital.

No, Charlie sighed he was no longer convinced Harry was a monster , but he was a haunted person and a hunted one.

Harry was haunted by his own daemons and hunted by the followers of the man he'd destroyed. He'd nearly died because of them and Charlie did not want his sister touching that anymore then he wanted her touching a drunken playboy.

"…No. I haven't I still think her being with him is a bad idea but not for the reasons you might think. I think Harry would truly make and effort to make her happy and even might succeed for a while. In the end though he'd hurt her though being wife to an auror is hard enough on a woman never knowing if her husband will come home that day but being wife to Harry Potter would be even harder." Charlie answered his brother after much thought.

"But that's no different then anyone who's an Auror, many Aurors are married and yes there is risk but you cant possibly think Ginny isn't strong enough to handle it?" Dean scoffed.

Bill shrugged, "I don't know is she. Normally I'd say yes Ginny's made of some stern stuff but Charlie has a point Harry's different all together as soon as he goes on a job he's no longer the hunter but the hunted can you deny it Dean?"

Dean bit his lip grudgingly and shook his head, "No. Dark wizards don't avoid him when we go to bring them in like they do other aurors. Most Dark wizards wont attack us till their cornered. With Harry they want to see him die. they attack and try to trap simply because he's who he is."

Arthur nodded speaking for the first time, "That young man hurt my little girl. He has some repercussion to pay for that but I'll be honest with you boys. I loved him like a son and part of me cant help but hope he has changed as you say Dean. I would like nothing more for Harry's sake alone. And if he has then I'll be more then happy to welcome him back into the fold."

At the immediate hisses and uproar that this caused Arthur Weasley raised a hand for silence, "Hush you lot! Where you got your impatience I'll never know your mum and I are not nearly this hotheaded. If you'd let me finish please?"

Once they'd quieted he nodded continuing. " Although I'd welcome him and expect you boys to keep a civil tongue in your heads I would never allow him to marry Ginny. I've watched what war does to a woman. In the last one it nearly tore your mother apart and she's a strong woman no one can deny that. To watch me go to work for the order and not know if I would return was hard on her you all remember that. Harry will never not be a hunted man and unlike even us back in the last war he's singularly hunted. His family, his wife and his children may never be truly safe. He would certainly never be safe one of these days as sad as it is some Dark wizard is going to get lucky and score a hit. They nearly did this time if it weren't for Deans quick thinking. That kind of life is not what I want for my daughter. With Davey she doesn't have to worry about any of that."

"But Dad, what If she doesn't love him." Charlie asked as everyone else except he and Dean agreed.

"She said yes to him didn't she? Seems to me she's already made up her mind perhaps this is pretrial nerves." Ron shrugged.

Charlie glared at him, "Like your groom ones? Then we might as well rule Davey out because Davey isn't like Hermione Ron he wont wait around for two years for her to stop dithering about."

When Ron clenched his fists and stomped towards him Bill shot to his feet and pushed both of them apart. "Ron he's only speaking the truth for the life of me I can't figure out your hesitation to just marry the girl already! And Charlie that was a low blow and really it's none of your affair. Now what decision have we reached here?"

"That Harry might or might not be a complete loss but either way he doesn't get to have our sister and to make sure that doesn't happen we're giving her affianced the heads up." Percy stated helpfully.

"I didn't agree to that." Dean mumbled.

"Are you with or against us Thomas." Fred snapped.

"I'm with you and with Harry. I understand your reservations and I understand your wanting to be fair to Davey even though that's not what this is about and you know it. I don't even think you particularly like Davey, and this is just a way to get him to warn off Harry but even so it's the fair thing. However I have some conditions I help you out and warn Harry off if you agree to be fair to him. No more beating him up for the fun of it, no more shadowing Ginny like overprotective mongrels. Alow them to be friends if nothing else." Dean insisted

Ron looked like he wanted to protest but Bill gave him a quelling glance. "Alright we agree, we'll stop beating on Harry and leave Ginny alone and If after we tell Davey the man is still willing to let Ginny be friends with Harry then we wont interfere. Agreed Gentlemen."

Dean sighed in defeat, he had done his best Harry would have to run with what little he had. "Agreed."

**Change of scene**

"Do they think we're blind? I mean there we are just arrived at my cousins and Percy tells me he's been called into work. He leaves for work in such a hurry that he forgets all his supplies now I ask you ladies has my Percy ever been unprepared for work a day in his life? Never mind the fact that his boss has never screeched , Percy you back nosed blighter get on home we have an emergency, before" Penelope Weasley, formerly Clearwater laughed arching her eyebrows as the other ladies gathered in the kitchen of the burrow chuckled rolling their eyes at the foolishness of the men they were married too.

Mrs Weasley who was pouring Tonks another cup of tea shook her head, "And he expected you to believe he was fleeing to work?"

Hermione giggled behind her hands, "Penny you should tell him he left his things at home and you went to the ministry to give them to him."

Jane who had arrived just in time to hear the tale was nibbling daintily on a scone laughed aloud. "You think too simple granger she should hide them first. He'll go back to his office and no one will have seen them. He'll be looking for his supplies for weeks."

There was more chuckling amongst the women and Clarita shook her head smiling at her cousin. "Your evil Jane. Something like that would likely drive poor Percy mad."

Jane shrugged, "He has only himself to blame for lying to his wife and being such a stick in the mud. Me I wouldn't even blink."

Clarita, Mrs Weasley, Tonks, Angelina, Alicia, Fleur Hermione, Jane, Penelope and a wary looking Corry were gathered in Mrs. Weasels kitchen at her request. Corry was the only one not sure why she had been owled for tea but she was fast warming up to the warm hearted women whom so obviously cared for Ginny and their men.

Penelope smiled to herself, Percy got itchy about those kinds of things it would be amusing to watch him fall to pieces over what anyone else would have seen as something small. She'd keep it in mind.

"What do you think their discussing, probably _Men _things. Oh yes something so masculine we poor women couldn't wrap our heads around their logic." Alicia George's wife shook her head.

Angelina snorted she and Alicia were newly weds George and Fred having married them only a year before in a rather rambunctious double wedding. However she was fast learning that when it came to logic her husbands was incredibly twisted. "Thank you god" She sighed and laughter broke out again.

"Oh now dear of course their discussing Ginny and Harry it's what we're all discussing. Whether or not to give them a boost or give him the boot." Mrs. Weasley clarified.

Having had the topic of discussion finally brought up the women more then eagerly began to toss in their two cents worth.

"Well I've always liked Harry he helped save Katie in our seventh year and he's always been kind to me." Alicia said.

"Potters always been decent enough I never had a problem with him. He was nice as a kid but if you read the papers he's kind of one of them fastboys." Penelope added glancing around for confirmation.

Angelina nodded, "Yeah for a while there the papers were calling him the Play Boy Prince. You couldn't read a magazine without him and some blonde on the cover." She shrugged, "Not sayin that makes him scum boys will be boys but it's not exactly a plus on the marriage lists."

Tonks was nodding, "When Harry lived with us we were either throwing out bottles of booze or women from his room. Ladies I want you to understand that fame didn't go to Harry's head and he didn't turn into another jaded celebrity. Harry…well…" Tonks couldn't seem to find the right words to explain.

Hermione opened her mouth to speak. "All I know was that one day I had a best friend I was proud of and willing to follow anywhere. The next day he was tearing all of that apart and telling me he didn't need me. Once I got past the hurt part of it I began to think maybe he did it to protect us to keep us from going with him. Wouldn't that have been just like him to go it alone. So despite everything I was hopeful but when he got back and I saw how he treated Ginny I thought I'd been wrong after all."

Tonks shook her head. " No I think you were right I think Harry loved all of you and loosing the headmaster made him do what he thought would keep the rest of you safe. If he simply asked you to stay behind then even if he somehow got you to agree at first, eventually you all would have followed anyway. So he told you a bunch of lies, I think Harry thought that if he died defeating Voldemort at least he wouldn't have to watch you suffer and that if he lived he could come back and tell you why he did what he did and everything would work out."

Molly nodded, "Ginny would have forgiven him right away she was ready too and Hermione you just said you would have. I think even Ron in the back of his mind was ready to forgive him."

Hermione scoffed and Mrs Weasley rounded on her, "Oh I know my son Miss granger and he blusters but most of it is just hurt pride. He still loves that boy as much as you do and is waiting for him to come around. Why do you think he won't marry you?"

Hermione blinked at her in confusion, "what does that have to do with Harry?"

"Everything! weren't you listening to all of that nonsense when he was helping plan? He was planning that wedding the way we all thought we would be planning it. For four. And the fact that it wasn't going to happen that way didn't sit right with him and still doesn't. So he makes up excuses and he'll wait years until Harry comes around and he can have the wedding he really wants."

Hermione threw up her hands in exasperation, "Well a double wedding always did sound nice and I would like that after all we've been through it might even be perfect but if that's what he really wants why is he so adamant about Harry staying away from Ginny."

"Because he did hurt her and he is unstable no matter what he secretly wants or wishes he'll try his best to protect her. Harry may have hurt her at first to protect her but when he came back he was so cold so distant he continued to hurt her. How do you explain that?" Molly asked turning to Tonks.

"The same way I explain the drinking and the women." Tonks sighed. "I don't like to talk about it because it scares me and I'm worried about what it all means but Molly if you had stuck around to try and help heal him you would have seen that Harry was not just acting like a playboy. A playboy enjoyes sexual conquests and drinking because they give him a thrill. Harry wasn't living fast because it gave him enjoyment, Harry didn't even know what Joy was I don't think. Sometimes he would look at you and your blood would freeze, if you looked into his eyes you would have to look away because there was nothing."

Tonks shivered and their was absolute silence in the room a chill having come into the room as if speaking of it alone could have the same affect.

"The boy we all knew that decent kid you ladies are discussing died on his mission to free all of us. Harry didn't come back that thing standing on the platform and attending classes was a shell, a corpse. And a tortured one at night Remus and I could hear him in his room. He had such terrible nightmares some of the things I heard him mumble made me terrified. Harry suffered out there and he suffered horribly. He drank to drown away the memories and he slept around to feel close to something but it never seemed to work the way he wanted it to because he kept wanting to die. He would go out on his broom in thunderstorms flying into the wind chasing lighting bolts. He would do things that no sane person would do as if he was begging to be killed. I don't know exactly what we did to get through to him but eventually he started living again. The boy we knew never came back but the man that he is today began to emerge." Tonks explained.

Her Corry nodded finally jumping in, "Harry's sober and dedicated he knows how to have fun and he does laugh. Not easily but he can party with Dean and Devon or enjoy a couple bottles of fire whisky with them if he's in the mood. He's responsible and truly he could lead our team our chief has offered him the leadership of his own team but he's refused. He's happy to live simply when he could afford so much better. He's dated a few women but it's only lasted a few months and after the third one of those he quiet dating altogether. He's married to his work now and he's been the steadiest partner I've had since I met him."

Molly was grinning from ear to ear obviously pleased with these results.

"However, lately…lately he hasn't been the same. Those nightmares Tonks was talking about I think they're coming back and they're getting worse. It's like he's having a panic attack he'll completely freeze and when he opens his eyes they'll be blank and empty and its frightening. Whatever happened to him it wasn't good and I think it's crippled him."

A shiver went through all of them at once. Molly put her hands to her lips and they were trembling slightly.

"poor boy, he's never asked for any of his lot." she said.

Corry nodded, "And he really does love your daughter Mrs. Weasley. And your son and you Hermione. He's bored Devon and I to tears with the same stories about the three of you but we let him because when he talks about you the nightmares seem far from his mind and he seems whole and happy."

Hermione's lips trembled slightly, "How did Harry get hurt on the job."

"A former death eater set a trap for him. The bait was a little boy and Harry tried to save him. The man nearly got him with the killing curse but Dean knocked him out of the way with a wooden beam. He fell on a piece of metal and stabbed himself. He knew it was a trap but he couldn't help but try anyway. The boy ended up dying anyway and if Dean had been a second later Harry would have died with him." Corry said with a shake of her head.

Mrs. Weasley glanced around the set faces of the women around her. "Well ladies what do you think?"

A slow smile spread on Hermione's face. "I think that sounds like Harry. And everyone knows Harry and Ginny are perfect for each other. Like always they'll need a little boost though."

Molly nodded smiling fondly, "It does sound like Harry. He always was such a dear boy. I've missed him and you bet your pixies now that we have him we aren't giving him up. His daemons or whatever else is haunting him will just have to find someone else to have."

"What about Davey?" Clarita asked.

"Ginny doesn't even like him, and She likes Harry believe me you should have seen them this morning like too guilty teenagers caught in the back seat. " Jane giggled. "And she's walking him to his apartment tonight…alone."

There was more wild giggling.

"Do the men know?" Molly asked.

"Unfortunately yes, Charlie that ape was hovering as usual when I set that up." Jane sighed. "And you can bet there will be four or seven hound dogs on her trail tonight preventing any romanticism whatsoever."

Mrs. Weasley smiled a determined glint in her eyes. "Not if we can help it. Agreed ladies?"

The women all looked around at each other slow cat like smiles spreading from ear to ear. "Agreed."

**Change of scene**

"So they're telling Davey, that's not good Dean not good at all." Seamus frowned wiping the counter top of the bar in front of the stool in which his friend sat upon. It was early evening and people were beginning to tinkle in but the real rush wouldn't come until after dinner.

His sandy blond hair kept flopping in front of his eyes but he refused to cut it. He was working on a playful sort of charm that his mother assure him he had succeeded with. Seamus was fairly popular with the ladies he wasn't a knock out looker or anything. He was proud to say it was his charm that attracted them, Dean often said that it was a mix of his Irish brogue and goofy grin that fooled women into thinking he was semi-human. What were best friends for.

"Yes they plan to meet up with him after he drops Ginny off." Dean confirmed.

Hmmm, this was a pickle indeed. As soon as the brothers told him Davey would march over to Harry's and the end result would not be good. Unless…a wicked cat like gleam glowed in Seamus eyes as he grinned. "Oi mate we cant have none of that now can we. You just tell them to come on over to my place for a few drinks before hand don't care how you do it just do. I'll have them dancing on my tables before ten. They wont remember their own names before I'm done with them." He smirked.

Dean glanced at him then burst out laughing. "Sea you imp that's perfect. It will only be temporary but it will give Harry and Ginny this evening alone together. It's brilliant."

Seamus winked at him, "I always was glad you finally noticed Thomas."

"It is a little underhanded their wives wont be happy when they come stumbling in." Dean noted.

Seamus rolled his eyes, "it's their own faults for being unromantic, had it been me dealing with this mess I would have done everything in my power to help them along without batting an eye."

Dean was shaking his head, "Alright see you later you scamp I'll bring the boys around and look the other way as you take advantage of them."

Seamus nodded still grinning, "Of course you will did you think you wouldn't?"

Dean tried to toss his glass of whiskey at him but Seamus scampered out of the way still grinning. "Don't ruin the place now."

"When are you going to get a woman and stop making me worry about you Finnigan?" Dean sighed.

"When I find someone who can keep up with me. You never could, pity that." Seamus sighed.

Dean cocked an eyebrow, " I was never in the market. Was I?"

Seamus tossed his rag at him a green tinge coming to his face. "Good God no, get out of here with that."

Dean laughed. "Just checking, mate just checking"


	11. Chapter 11: YOU WALKED AWAY!

The sainted Abernathy was all that Ginny had expected from Daveys older brother and more. He was a tall thin waspish looking man with dull brown hair that he kept neatly clipped and perfectly tailored. His thin golden spectacles glinted impersonally in the restaurants candle light, and his tapered fingers tapped consistently on the table as if he was pondering something profound and wanted you to know about it.

Yes that seemed to be the running theme with Abernathy, From the moment they had sat down the conversation had revolved around him and when it strayed he was sure to bring it back to himself. His wife and Davey seemed just fine with that both of them content to crow his praises all evening long.

"Isn't that amazing Ginny what a break through in magical maladies don't you think?" Davey asked her excitedly. Ginny had hours ago stopped listening and could only smile blandly.

"Wonderful."

Davey didn't even notice her lack of attention he turned back to his brother and the two of them began a studious debate on whether felix nerata was a proper potion to use on depression and whether depression at all should be treated. Both brothers were firm in their belief that Depression was for muggels and if you could magic yourself happy why deal with it.

Bored of sitting on the sidelines Ginny jumped into the debate, "Don't you see what a trap that is? If you're always using magic to feel happy then you aren't every really happy. You'll become dependant on a potion instead of living. What happens when you can't brew the potion any longer you'd be completely unstable."

Davey jumped as if a rocket had been fired so unaware of her presence that the mere sound of her voice could make him start. Abernathy blinked at her in surprise as if the novelty of her having a voice was something new. The two men glanced at each other and Davey turned and smiled at her.

"Of course your right Ginny, but that's hardly a problem as there wouldn't be any reason not to have a full stock of the potion. Abernathy plans to have every brewery in London stocked by midsummer." He explained and he patted her hand in that way that always annoyed her and turned back to his brother.

A spurt of indignation flared insider her and she fought it back, Davey didn't mean to treat her like…like..

_A small child? A fool? An idiot take your pick._

Like she was less then him, he just was caught up with his brothers. Her own brothers…

_At least don't treat their women like they're four. They respect their opinions at least and can carry out a conversation with them as equals. Are you going to stand for this, if…WHEN the two of you marry you'll have to live with this the rest of your life. Nip it in the bud and nip it now._

"I have to go to the loo." Ginny sighed picking up her hand purse and escaping quickly to the bathroom. Good heavens she didn't know what was wrong with her, Davey wasn't acting any differently then he normally did but usually she could at least tolerate it a little. Tonight her eyes kept drifting to the clock and every move he made seemed to annoy her.

She wanted this date to be over, she wanted to say goodbye to Abernathy and never see the arrogant bore again. Except he'd be her brother-in-law, she'd have to see him at the wedding and it was obvious Davey thought the world of him so she would probably have too.

Suddenly her future looked incredibly gloomy. Her eyes darted to the clock in the ladies lavatory and she felt her mood lighten it was ten thirty Davey would be wrapping up soon and even if he wasn't Ginny would remind him she had a friend to pick up.

A bubble of excitement started to form in her stomach as she nearly floated back to their table suddenly her evening was looking up. As she neared their table Davey and Abernathy were having a rather heated and loud conversation.

"I'm not saying the girl isn't beautiful Davey boy, I'm just saying she's a little fanciful that's not good in a medi-witch. If she thinks with her emotions rather then good sense she'll only hurt herself in the end." Abernathy was saying.

Ginny sucked in a breath, was that overgrown sore talking about _her_?

"Ginny is not usually so emotional I'm very proud of her good sense. Lately she's been different, I'll admit brother I'm a little worried about her." Davey tried to explain shaking his head.

_Oh of all the nerve!_

Ginny made a lot of noise whistling boisterously as she swept back into her seat smiling at both of them. Only Abernathy's wife smiled in return and even she seemed a little disdainful of he inelegant entrance.

Abernathy gave her a smile that didn't reach his eyes, "Ginny we were just discussing you."

She raised one eyebrow, was he just going to come right out and admit it then? "Were you?" She asked as innocently as she could.

Abernathy nodded, "Davey was telling me about your accomplishments at St. Mungos he was practically glowing."

Ginny eyed Davey with wry amusement, "Was he now?"

Abernathy nodded, "I do however have some concerns about your wedding plans Its my hope you wont keep him waiting too long I was thinking within the next month it would be best for all concerned if…"

Ginny felt her amusement quickly fade. The man was reprimanding her! He didn't even know her and he was reprimanding her for keeping his brother waiting. "Excuse me?"

"Now you have to be fair Ginny I want to believe the best of you that you were just being flighty and indecisive rather then purposely stringing him along, but either way it's gone on long enough. I have to be in the States in a month to begin business and for all those involved it would be best if you married within the month." Abernathy explained firmly.

Ginny glared at Davey trying to communicate with her eyes that she wanted to leave before she said something to offend his precious big brother.

Davey cringed and put his hand over hers, "Now Ginny Abernathy has a point I don't see any reason why we cant get married within the month."

She'd tried.

Ginny tossed down her napkin, "Well I see plenty of reason. My family being one their expecting to be a part of our wedding believe it or not. So no Abernathy a within the month is what's best for you, not all those involved. _I'm_ involved aren't I? it's certainly not best for me and that's final!"

She stood and ignored Davey's protests completely satisfied with the shocked look on his brothers face. The ape had probably never been told no in his life.

"Ginny wait where are you going?" Davey called out. He didn't get up, he wasn't going to follow her or apologize for his brothers behavior. Shouldn't' that disappoint her, hurt her? It stung her pride a little but as for hurt it really didn't hurt like it should. She was suddenly just…

_Done._

Done with this evening this entire scene. She didn't respond to his calls her mind already having left the restaurant, her thoughts centered on the man waiting for her back at St. Mungos.

**Change of scene**

Charlie glanced at the clock on the far wall of the Pot of Gold and grimaced. Five past eleven, Ginny and Davey would have left the restaurant by now Davey would be on his way home if they were going to warn him in time to stop anything happening between Harry and Ginny they had better get a move one.

Spying his brothers Bill who appeared to be so deep in his cups he was practically asleep, the other one of the twins was on top of the table singing a nonsense song on the top of his lungs to the delight of a gathered crowd. He had seen the other twin rush to the bathroom a good five minutes before looking green around the gills. Ron was in the middle of a foot loose and fancy free kind of dance that only a troll could call dancing. Dean who's idea it had been to stop in for a drink while waiting had mysteriously disappeared.

Charlie sighed, perhaps it was divine providence but if they didn't sober up Davey would have to go one more night unaware that another man was moving in on his territory. Ron went lurching by a giggling brunette on his arm whom looked as if she didn't know whether this was dancing or a race.

Charlie sighed, one more night then.

**Change of scene**

"So if you don't mind my asking how did your date go?" Harry asked her. He didn't know why he asked but walking along the quiet street leading to his apartment building watching her walk in the moonlight was doing funny things to him and he needed to make conversation.

When she had first picked him up she had genuinely looked glad to see him and had indeed told him so. But as they had walked conversation had faded into compatible silence as they walked along. Harry had begun to watch her then, to watch the way her hips swayed with each movement not purposely provocative like some women. It was something energetic and graceful all at once, he couldn't put a name to it but it fascinated him just the same.

Her hair turned mahogany in the moonlight and it looked incredibly soft to his eyes more then once he caught himself reaching out to touch it, he had to hide the gesture by instead reaching up to try an neaten his own hair. Which was a lost cause and they both new it.

He wasn't even sure what she was wearing underneath her jacket but her skirt made him all too aware of the legs beneath them and he had to keep jerking his eyes towards the tress and the other buildings they were passing as they walked. He had not had a problem keeping his eyes fixed on a woman's face in years and with the one woman he was trying to impress the most he couldn't seem to stop staring at her like she was food.

He figured talking about her fiancé would tame the rampaging beast. Although if she started singing the mans praises he wasn't sure it would quite, no he was sure the scaly thing would rear its ugly head and roar in protest. They'd reached his apartment building and as Harry stuck his key in the lock and opened the door he kicked himself for being so stupid. Ginny remained silent even as they walked down the hall and he waited for her response.

He didn't expect her to gush Ginny wasn't a gusher but he had braced himself for some pleasure, instead she grimaced. The beast he still didn't have a name for that only seemed to awaken when Ginny was around roared in triumph at her obvious displeasure. He tried not to let it show on his face he didn't think she'd like him grinning like a fool at something that obviously brought her displeasure. He would grin when he was alone.

"That great huh? What happened?" He asked.

"Oh Harry you should have heard the two of them they were worse then all of my brothers combined. They were…were…were like Percy on his worst day. I was the pretty little girl with out a brain in my head, needing some big strong man to tell me how to do things."

Harry gulped as her eyes flared with the heat of her anger and he had to contemplate briefly how much of a lost cause he must be when even flushed with indignation and fury she still reminded him of venus.

Without warning her anger turned on him and he took a hasty step backwards.

"Men are always doing that! You made the choice to leave me behind without even asking me how it would make me feel. Without even giving me the benefit of the doubt. I was supposed to be the meek little woman who waited and watched at the door for her big strong hero to come home. I'm not having it! The next time you want to play hero fine, but you're not leaving me behind is that clear!" She demanded furiously jabbing him with one pointed finger.

Part of him was a little frightened of her obvious fury, he didn't exactly like it pointed in his direction. He thought it best to nod in agreement. The other part of him seemed to be singing with joy, his feet having suddenly grown wings. She'd said the next time, as if she was expecting a future with him.

_She might have meant as friends._

He didn't care what she'd meant he was flying on air and he wasn't going to let anything bring him down.

Ginny had her hands on her hips now and he had the silliest urge to grab her by the waist and hold her to him, or to swing her about just to hear her laugh. Too bring a smile to her face.

_Don't act like a fool, she's engaged to another man take it slow._

_I don't want too._

_Aren't you listening to her she's tired of males doing what they want to do. Do what she wants to do for once in your life._

"Well good, you just see you remember that Mr. Potter." She huffed. He wasn't quite able to bite back what must look like a foolish grin.

She was so…so…brilliant. Even in her skirt and sandals and a simple jean jacket she looked more sophisticated then any other woman he'd ever met. And at the same time she looked as simple as a country girl running bare foot through a meadow her skirts kicking. How was it possible to be classy fancy, wild, free and untamed all at once.

Somehow she managed it and he couldn't take his eyes off her, couldn't stop grinning like a fool as she turned back to grin at him sheepishly.

"That wasn't fair, I feel like a idiot." She mumbled looking mortified.

"No you don't, you look perfect you…" Harry groaned inwardly. Now he even sounded like a fool.

Ginny's cheeks turned pink and her eyes went to the ground.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that I know you don't…:" Harry began to apologies.

Ginny rapidly shook her head, "no…it's ok. I…thank you."

The silence after that was awkward and a little strained. Harry kicked himself.

_Do you have to be such a dunce around her? You were getting on just fine and then you go and spit out something that stupid._

"Harry?"

Harry's head instantly snapped up and he cringed as his voice came out as eager as a child to please a parent, "yes?"

"Do you, do you even care what I think. I mean really do you look at me and see well a nice package but nothing else?" Ginny asked him.

Harry was appalled, where had she ever gotten the idea that a man might….well never mind that was obvious. He supposed he in his own way and her fiancé and her brothers in their way had led her to believe that.

He stopped her from walking taking a hold of her hand and holding it tight. He could feel the sudden flutter of her pulse beneath the skin of her wrist as she stared slightly wide eyed at him.

"Ginny I never wanted to make you feel useless, or that I didn't value you. That's the last thing I wanted. God Ginny since the first time I realized I loved you I've wanted to be able to tell you exactly what you mean to me. How you make me feel but I can never seem to find the words." He stressed to her as firmly as he could.

She stepped in closer to him and her scent the one he would recognize even in his dreams invaded his nostrils and made him feel slightly intoxicated.

"Tell me, please tell me all that you can." She whispered.

"Sometimes I think you must be a dream, or something I made up to complete me and then when I realize your flesh and bone and real I get scared because what could I ever really do to deserve you. Sometimes I have to fight to remember your not perfect just so I can feel worthy of even trying to be with you, softer then anything I've ever touched, no rose or perfume could ever beat the way you smell and the sound you make when you laugh is sweeter then any stupid birds song that's ever been sung."

_You sound like an idiot, the way she smells way to sound like a psycho!_

_It's true though they should bottle the way she smells it's the best scent in the entire world._

_I bet you're the only man that thinks so._

_I better be._

Ginny didn't say anything she was looking at him with a look of dazed wonder and he hurried on hoping to salvage what was left of the conversation. "See I told you I have no idea what to say or how to say it. You make me tongue tied and everything I could say sounds stupid. Your lovely I won't deny it but your also smart and brave. The way you attack life makes me ashamed at my reluctance to live it. What could I ever even offer you, I can't even offer you words I don't know why I even bother when…"

His words ended on a yelp of surprise as Ginny threw her hands around his neck and dragged him downwards. He barely had a moment to register what had happened when her lips were rising to meet his and then he couldn't have cared less.

Every thought he'd ever possessed fled his mind and his entire focus pinpointed on the feelings roaring to life inside of his body. It went deeper then just his body something was breaking, changing taking flight within his soul and it was enough to make his limbs tremble and shake as he pulled her to him.

She tasted better then he remembered, his memories seemed a mockery of just how wonderfully sweet her kisses were. He didn't mean to but he couldn't seem to help ravishing her mouth , holding her tighter or breathing her name clinging to her like a man drowning.

Her hands were in his hair and the feel of her fingers massaging his scalp was only making the crazyness that had suddenly overtaken him that much worse.

He wanted to hold her like this forever, he wanted to kiss her like this forever. He wanted to be her friend, her confidant. He wanted to be her lover and he wanted it now!

He didn't exactly know how he got the door of his apartment open he was sure he fumbled with it for a good hour but he finally kicked it open and they stumbled backwards into the room neither of them willing to separate their bodies or their lips.

He was surely going to die, surely the body wasn't meant to hold this much emotion, this much passion would surly fry his insides. It was both painful and addictive. It was glorious and it was heady, it was her and it was him. It was them together the way they should be.

_But not like this. Not now she belongs to somebody else._

The beast inside him made a furious protest.

_She belongs to YOU…._

_No…not yet…._

He warred with himself wanting her more then he wanted his next breath.

**Change of view**

She had never felt anything like this, she had never been quiet this swept away by feeling or by need. She needed him, had always needed him and to have his hands on her skin his kisses on he throat, on her lips was robbing her of whatever good sense she had.

But his kisses were slowing, they lingered and spoke of longing and needing but still they slowed.

_He didn't want her._

The sudden thought pierced her heart like an arrow and as he drew away from her she willed herself not to cry, and beg for the reason after he had said such lovely words. Why didn't he want her?

"Harry?" She hated the way her voice shook and how it had sounded like a question.

His fingers caressed her cheek and he moaned softly resting his forehead against hers. "Ginny I love you. But I can't act like fool forever. You, you're engaged and I know if we do this now you'll regret it later. Damn it Ginny we should be lovers and you know that but I won't I cant until your free. Please don't hate me for that."

_Hate him? _

She hated herself, she was mortified absolutely horrified with herself, she didn't resist as Harry latterly pushed her out the door as if she was a plague carrier and slammed it in her face. She wouldn't have been surprised if he had charmed it shut behind her. How could she have done what she'd promised herself and her mother she wouldn't do. Did this qualify as cheating? Had she Ginny Weasley just been unfaithful to a man for the first time in her life.

She groaned holding her head in her hands, why did she loose all her good sense whenever Harry was around, she was lucky he at least had a scrap of morality she….

And then it dawned on her. She would have slept with Harry without a second thought back there, she who agonized over the prospect of doing _that _with any man with almost frightening intensity. She who looked down on women who used sex like a play thing not particularly caring who it was with as long as he was still breathing. She had not even spared a thought for the man she had always thought she would be saving herself for, that would be Davey since she would be married to him shortly. She'd always said she wasn't going to spread herself like butter and that it was going to be one man and she was marrying DAVEY!

And yet everything in her protested at the very thought. Especially after his behavior this evening the thought of doing with Davey what she'd just done with Harry left a sour taste in her mouth. She'd thrown herself on Harry offered him something she prized and….he'd turned her away.

Jane's words floated to the forefront of her mind, _"A sure way to tell if he's changed is to offer him a one night stand. If he takes it and walks away all you've proved is what you already knew"_

She'd definitely just offered it and Harry had not taken it. In fact he'd proved to be both smart and honorable most men would have seen it as Davey's loss. Part of her was a little disappointed that Harry wasn't like most men.

Jenny walked home with a mix of exhilaration, Harry had rejected her proving once and for all he was not just after an easy conquest, and with a mix of disappointment, for Harry had in rejecting her denied them both the chance to explore just where that path of dizzying emotion led.

**Change of scene.**

"AND YOU WALKED AWAY?"

Ginny thought poor Jane was going to die on the spot as they headed towards the pot of gold the next evening both of them having worked the same shift today and getting off of work at the same time. Jane had demanded to know how her date had gone and when Ginny had began to describe the restaurant Davey had taken her Jane had waved her words away and clarified that she'd meant Harry.

Ginny knew Jane would insist on having every detail and having already had plans to meet Hermione for a drink at the Pot of Gold invited Jane along.

"You've never been to the Pot, have you Jane it's fairly new my friend Seamus runs it…"

"Don't change the Subject Ginny Weasley!" Jane interrupted her obvious attempt at doing just that.

Ginny sighed opening the swinging door of the Tavern knowing Jane wasn't going to let it go. At least she didn't have to worry about her brothers trailing her tonight. Each one of them was doing his best to avoid their wives ire. Apparently the seven of them excluding Charlie had come home the evening before completely trashed. Drunkenness was not a fondness of the Weasley women. Charlie was in trouble apparently for letting them do it which he protested wasn't fair at all he wasn't his brothers keeper after all.

Ginny could have laughed at that double standard. Charlie could watch his brothers drink themselves silly but watched her cup like a hawk measuring every sip she took. Maybe it was just the way of protective older brothers but it could be darned annoying.

She spotted Hermione at the bar chatting with Seamus and when Seamus spotted her he waved. Ginny waved back and hurried over Jane tagging at her heels.

"How you doing fox hair, long legs, goddess divine, temptress with a temper, Venus with the hair like mars. Have I exhausted all the cliché pet names?" Seamus greeted her with a wink.

Ginny giggled reaching across the bar to give him a warm hug, From behind her Jane laughed "You forgot Scarlet vixen. Our girl Ginny here still has some explaining to do."

Seamus looked startled for a moment then he burst out laughing, "the Scarlet Vixen, that's a good one." He grinned at Jane and Ginny sighed. As annoying as Seamus's pet names could be the man was just too…

Cute? Boyish? Charming? What was it about Seamus that made a woman want one of him on her shelf or in her closet. Like a favorite stuffed animal or that Kiss me I'm Irish t-shirt that never went out of style. Perhaps it was the accent and the boyish grin but it was hard to be angry with Seamus over anything.

Even over a horrid nickname like Scarlet vixen.

Jane nudged Ginny hard in the ribs and hissed in a stage whisper, "hey mind introducing me to my next boyfriend."

Ginny and Hermione giggled as Seamus turned pink and Jane grinned saucily at him.

"Seamus this is my friend Jane she works with me. My only advice to you is to just accept it. When Jane knows what she wants she tends to get it. And she fights dirty." Ginny gestured to Jane in way of introduction.

"Oh I'm not as bas as all that am I granger." Jane asked.

Hermione snorted, "she's right Seamus she's worse my advice is run before she eats you alive."

Seamus laughed as Jane glared at her two friends who continued to snicker at her. "You don't need to worry any ladies, I've been a bachelor for many years and prefer my life that way."

Jane eyed him speculatively, "saving yourself for someone special or moaning over the one who got away?"

Seamus grinned, " Well I was saving myself for someone special but then you walked into the room and I don't think I need to be saving anymore." He winked at her and Ginny moaned rolling her eyes.

Jane blinked at him startled then chuckled, "oh your good Irish, very good. I'd watch my back if I were you one of these days your going to say that to men and really mean it and I won't believe you."

Seamus appeared to think that over and grinned, "I'm not worried too much about that Scottish."

"What you don't believe in love?" Jane asked raising an eyebrow.

"Of course I do! I love all my girlfriends and I love these two lovely ladies. I'm bursting with so much love I think it would be a crime to only give it to one woman." Seamus replied solemnly as if he was the picture of seriousness.

"Oh brother" Hermione muttered.

"They deserve each other, Jane's always saying she can't choose just one man because…" before Ginny could finish her dry remark Jane seemed to remember her presence.

"oh I wouldn't finish that thought Missy. Don't think I've forgotten for a minute that you still haven't answered me." She turned to Seamus and Hermione, "our little Scarlet Vixen walked Harry back to his apartment last night alone!"

Seamus wolf whistled and Hermione looked surprised and shocked at the notion. "With Davey? Did Davey know?" She asked.

Ginny shook her head, "Davey has tried to owl me several times this morning but I have sent them all back. Our Date ended in disaster and Harry's just a friend I don't need to update him on my entire life."

Jane and Seamus snorted at the same time.

"Oh come on Ginny," Jane sighed.

"Harry is not just your friend" Seamus contained.

"Nor has he ever been just your friend your either dating or…" Jane insisted.

"biding your time for one of you to get a clue." Seamus finished.

Ginny blinked at the two of them this display of finishing each others sentences rather interestingly funny.

Jane smiled at Seamus and swatted his arm playfully, "You did that on purpose Irish."

Seamus winked at her, "Course I did Scottie."

Hermione groaned, "back to the point! So you walked him home alone what happened."

"Well we got to talking and he asked me about my date and I ended up making an idiot of myself and eventually asking him what he thought of me. I'm tired of everyone treating me like an empty headed doll and I was upset cause I thought he might see me the same way." Ginny sighed conforming to the inevitable.

"So what did he say?" Hermione asked eagerly.

She and Seamus seemed to hold their breaths as if they both feared Harry had screwed up and said something stupid.

Ginny felt her face turn red, she really didn't want to repeat it because then they'd know what she'd done in response and she was ashamed of that.

"Oh blast it all, I couldn't help it ok!" She shouted without intending to. "You have no idea what it's like to stand there and have a man look at you like no one in the world can outshine you and he's lucky just to be standing next to you and when he puts It into such beautiful words and the stupid fool doesn't even realize he's doing it you see if you don't loose your head a little." She seethed in frustrated defense of herself.

"In English that means Harry swept her off her feet and the two of them were getting steaming up his apartment." Jane translated.

Seamus let out a hoot of laughter appearing delighted with this prospect and Ginny was astonished that even Hermione appeared satisfied with these results.

"So when's the wedding day, I'm best man right or I suppose there is Ron but if you ask me I look better in dress robes." Seamus grinned.

Ginny shook her head mortified, "Are you all mental? I have a fiancé and it's not Harry. I just cheated on him last night and you're all patting me on the back?"

Seamus grinned, "Well of course. I don't happen to like Davey he doesn't treat you nice. Do _you_ even like your fiancé? You tolerate him pretty well but do you like him? You might want to consider that before you walk down the isle."

"look Ginny I'm not applauding sleeping with someone else when you're engaged but as long as its Harry I think we can forgive…" Hermione began.

Ginny leapt up in alarm, "Wait who says I slept with him. Hermione I've never slept with anyone!"

When Hermione and Seamus just blinked at her Jane growled a little. "Yep ladies and gentleman I fed her the perfect opportunity and she threw it out the window."

"Oh come on you can't be suggesting you wanted me to betray a commitment and Cheat on…"

"yes we can! It's what I'm saying aint it. I'd rather you dumped Davey first but I won't quibble over before or after." Seamus said.

Ginny looked to Hermione who nodded in agreement. "Yes of course I would want you to break up with Davey first it's the right thing to be but when it comes down to it I wouldn't make a big hash if you did the breaking up afterwards either. As long as it's Harry mind you don't go sleeping with any old bloke who strolls on up."

"Are you not listening I haven't SLEPT WITH ANYONE!" Ginny tried hard not to shout but ended up failing. People were turning around to star at the front of the bar.

"Well why on earth not Ginny, it's obvious Harry's the one you've been saving yourself for just like I never thought of making love with anyone but Ron and…"

Ginny choked on her own breath her eyes threatening to pop out of her head as she stared at the woman she had always thought of bookish and prim. In the back of her mind she had always thought Hermione would be a little prudish when it came to that kind of thing. "You what?" She gasped.

Jane rolled her eyes. "They've been engaged for two years and living together for longer did you think they were playing billiards all night up there?"

"No…but...there are two bedrooms…you…" Ginny tried and faltered.

"Well at first I insisted on sleeping alone but I do happen to love him and I am convinced he loves me and that came to an end one night not to much longer after we moved in. True I expected to be marrying him in a few months so I didn't worry on it too much. Like I said I chose my one and I have him so why quibble over the when and how." Hermione shrugged.

Ginny shuddered, there was just something….off about picturing her bother that way. "So basically the advice I'm getting from you all is that never mind Davey go ahead and fool around with Harry? What kind of friends are you?"

"No, weren't you listening to Harry last night. It's the reason he pushed you away he doesn't want to fool around with you. That's all it might have been if you two would have lost your heads. He would have been the guy who fooled around with another mans woman. He wants something much more and lasting, he wants you Ginny. Our advice is to dump the man who doesn't even know or seem to respect you and go for the one who obviously thinks you walk on water and respects you enough to save you from yourself! that's what kind of friends we are." Seamus insisted.

Jane looked up at him smiling warmly Ginny noted she'd rarely seen her friend smile like that at anyone, "well said Irish" she murmured.

"I do try Scottie I do try"

A/n: Fini I just want too say thanks much for the many faithful reviews. I'm sorry about any grammar or spelling mistakes. I have been in the process of getting a Betta to help, My dyslexia sometimes gets the better of me things get mixed around in my head a lot. I might not update for a while my sisters getting married in June and the family likes to travel during the summer and I don't know when I'll be home to use a computer I'll try as often as possible. Until then Updates should be pretty fast as I have nothing else to do. Thanks again for all the support I hope you enjoy this story as much as I do, I have such fun writing it.


	12. Chapter 12: Early spring

The next couple of days passed in a blur for Ginny, not because her work was extremely heavy or because she was extremely busy. Most of it was spent ignoring Davey's owls and his advances on her at work. It was easier there to pretend business and Davey was not the kind of guy who likes to make a scene so there at least he wouldn't press the matter. Avoiding him at home was harder as he had taken to showing up at her apartment and pleading to come in. She could hardly keep charming the door and listening to him wine through it.

So Ginny had taken to just not being at home, when off of work she chose to do one of three things that she enjoyed most. Visiting her family, shopping in Hogsmeade with Jane and Hermione or her new favorite thing spending time with Harry. That was what had made Ginny's week a blur the constant motion and the laughter. Ginny was either counting the minutes until she and Harry would go out for an ice cream in Diagon Alley or dazing off into space remembering walking down the street with him the summer son hot and the ice cream sticky but still feeling as if such a simple pleasure was the greatest one she would ever experience.

_So it's over between you and Davey, why haven't you told him?_

_Because I'm not quiet ready to look the man in the eye and tell him there's someone else. It's just not fair to him._

_He's not particularly fair to you either, sooner or later it would have ended you wouldn't be able to stand him for long. _

Ginny sighed and Frankie looked up from the small wooden table they had conjured on the lawn upon which he was building with a set of small miniature life like bricks that magically stuck as real bricks would have in cement. His miniature castle looked incredibly life like if a little lopsided next to him his little sister Rubella sat in her highchair her blonde curls standing out in the crowd of redheads like a beacon in the night. She had a light dusting of freckles on her cheeks the one testament to her fathers genes. Two years younger then her brother she wasn't quite as talkative yet or able to understand the heartfelt sigh.

"Are you ok Aunt Ginny?" Frankie asked looking as somber as a six year old possibly could holding a pile of tiny bricks in his hand and a cherry popsicle in the other.

Ginny smiled at him and couldn't quite resist the urge to smooth his red curls away from his eyes. As she assured him that she was fine she wondered what it would be like when she had children of her own. She knew that if she married the man she wanted to, had always wanted to that some of them might be redheaded as she was and maybe even have sparkling green eyes. A little girl like that maybe, but if she was to have a boy she just knew he would be as dark haired as his father and for the rest of her life she'd be trying to tame it and never succeeding. Ginny chuckled to herself, that might just be a mothers worst nightmare but she'd take the good with the bad,

What would they name him? Perhaps Harry might want to name him after his father. James was a fine name for a young boy, or perhaps after Sirius who had been more a father to him then his own father had been allowed. Or maybe he would want something completely different something with new meaning and new promise.

_Hold your hippogriffs the wedding bells haven't even rung yet. It's a little early to start painting the nursery. _She reprimanded herself but couldn't help a slight grin. That wouldn't last for long if she could help it. Sitting here in her mothers garden with her nieces and nephews at her feet she couldn't deny it any longer. She just plain didn't love, or at this moment even like Davey and she'd be a fool to tie her life to his. No more dithering around for Ginny Weasley. She happened to like, and definitely love Harry Potter and she wasn't settling for anything less.

"You look pretty as a picture, you know that. I hope you marry that young man soon it's more then time we added a coal headed little scamp to this mix" Charlie's voice interrupted her contemplations as he placed his young daughter who had just began to walk but had crawling into anything and everything down to an art form, on the blanket Ginny was sitting on.

She picked up Eileen delighted with the wide goofy grin that matched her fathers perfectly and the beautiful blue eyes that mirrored Clarita's. Behind him holding a sandwich between his tiny hands his wire rimmed glasses perched on his nose in perfect imitation of his father trailed Percy's little boy Marcus, or as the twins had deemed him Markie. At five years old he was still thin and coltish looking his hair more brown then red with some slight hints of it though in the sunlight.

Looking at the third generation of Weasley's always made Ginny smile the Weasley's could no longer be singularly known for their wild red hair. She agreed, even though she knew Charlie was referring to Davey and not Harry. It was more then past time.

"I think your right Charlie, that's why I'm not going through with it." Ginny remarked casually as if remarking on the weather and not breaking her engagement.

Charlie didn't even pretend to misunderstand her. "Are you sure Ginny, look I won't lie we were wrong about him and he deserves a chance to live and not have to keep paying for his mistakes. Keep in mind though do you have any idea how hard being his wife might be?"

Ginny had thought about that, she had thought about having to watch him walk out the door each moment and not knowing, that scared her more then anything and was the only true thing that gave her a bit of pause. "Well when it comes down to it he hasn't proposed yet and I still have time to make a choice. But whether I say yes to Harry or not I'm still sure of one thing. Davey is not for me."

Charlie groaned and Ginny's head snapped up to stare at him suspiciously. That groan had leaked with guilt. "What did you do?" She asked.

"I told Davey About Harry this morning we hoped he could knock some sense into you. To be reasonable but he wasn't very rational when I told him. He intended to talk to you as soon as his shift ended he's probably marching this way as we speak"

This was not Good, Ginny groaned, "Charlie how could you! I invited Harry here this afternoon to talk things over with the family."

"You invited him HERE?" Charlie demanded eyes instantly flaring up.

"Charlie Weasley you have no right to be angry you went behind my back and ratted on me! The nerve you have to be angry just because Harry's coming over! It's past time the men in this family said what you had to say to him and let it rest!" Ginny reprimanded him tired of his anger against Harry.

"What's? With all the shouting?" The back door opened and Ron poked his head out to stare questioningly at them both.

"Harry's on his way here!" Charlie spat.

"Wait isn't Davey…" Ron began,

Ginny whirled on him, "You knew too! You rat! Honestly the audacity of the men in this family! I can't believe you would do something like this!"

All of the shouting was drawing others out of their rooms and what they were doing to come and stare but Ginny didn't much care she was angry enough to strangle both her brothers.

She'd show him who was a little girl to have their lives run for them. She whipped out her wand without thinking and advanced on him threateningly. Ron paled backing up it was well known in their family that Ginny was the best with hexes.

"It wasn't just me all of us agreed, Bill and the twins and even Dad. Back off Ginny!" Ron pleaded darting past her to avoid the brunt of her anger.

She turned accusing eyes on her oldest brothers and her father. "Does everyone here want to help me run my life?"

"Ginny we understand your angry but you had no right to invite that…" Fred didn't finish, Ginny finally loosing her temper flicked her wand and he was suddenly choking on air and immediately afterwards a loud noise erupted from his throat. For a moment as he tried to speak all Fred could do was Bray like a donkey which caused his twin to erupt into hysterical laughter and the women hide their laughter behind their hands.

Fred looked the least amused and the more he tried to talk the worse his donkey calls got. Ginny smirked, "Act like an ass you might as well sound like one."

Bill was trying not to let his humor show managed to look stern as he reprimanded her, "Alright Ginny you've had your fun, now explain to us why you invited him when you know he's not welcome."

When Ginny lifted her wand Bill drew his and shook his head beginning to grin a little. "Oh no little sister you're not doing to me what you did to poor Fred over there."

His wife rolled her eyes and stepped between the two, "you don't need any help from her darling." Fleur remarked dryly.

"Yeah Bill you always sound like an…" George was wheezing from where he lay on the ground from laughing. He was clutching his sides as if in actual pain. Fred had fallen silent not wanting to give anyone anymore reason to mock him. He looked ready to murder her though.

"Fred dear you brought it on yourself If I were Ginny I would have removed a lot more then your voice and believe me I wouldn't have replaced it!" Angelina chided him.

Suddenly Fred erupted into loud braying that caused George to go off again and the children to giggle as their uncle hopped up and down braying like a mad man. Ginny had just flicked her wand to remove the spell in order to figure out just what had him so excited when she noticed he was pointing franticly to the walkway.

All eyes turned to watch Harry approach he looked a little apprehensive when he spotted the entire lot of them gathered on the lawn an especially the hostile glares of her brothers. He also continued to march determinedly forward. There was a loud popping sound like a car backfiring and Davey appeared just a little behind him.

Ginny Groaned things were about to get out of control.

"Hey, hold just a minute Potter!" Davey demanded rushing to catch up to him.

Harry turned around to face Davey and Ginny darted forward but felt Clarita's hand clamp down on her arm. "Let him handle it."

"That ape you call husband brought this on why should Harry have…" Ginny began heatedly but Clarita interrupted.

"Because none of are fellows will ever accept Harry until they measure him. It's the way of men darling if your always rushing to his defense no matter if it's the right thing or not they will see it as weakness on his part. Let Harry defend you and their masculine sensibilities will be appeased." Clarita clarified.

Ginny sighed suddenly wishing the world was populated by women.

Davey was standing in front of Harry looking thunderous and indignant. "What kind of man are you! To prey on another mans property just because your famous! You're an absolute cad and I won't have it, you can just stay away from Ginny from now on. You may be able to fool an innocent girl but you cant fool me!"

Harry's eyes narrowed and he glanced back at Ginny.

"Still need our sister to bail you out Potter? You didn't think we'd let you get away with it did you?" Fred sneered at him.

"better watch your mouth Fred you're beginning to bray again." George chuckled dodging the punch his twin threw at him.

"Ginny keep your mouth shut! We'll discuss this when I take you home this is between me and Potter." Davey warned her as if fearing she was about to defend Harry.

Ginny felt an instant spark of fury, one that had she looked she would have seen mirrored in her brothers eyes but her eyes were only for Harry. A flame of anger had let in them and she saw his fingers twitch as if already closing around his wand.

He didn't look towards her, he kept his eyes firmly on Davey but his voice despite its quite timber carried over to her, "Ginny I need to know."

_Know, know what?_

_If you love him you dunce._

Ginny felt her heart pick up its pace, "Yes!" She called back to him feeling adrenaline rush to her head and a sudden sense of relief having finally admitted it aloud.

Harry moved so fast he was a blur one minute he was standing as if relaxed the next his wand was out and he'd whirled around to grab Davey's arm and jerk him forward till his wand tip jabbed into the mans back in clear threat.

"UNHAND ME!" Davey screeched but Harry remained as cool an calm as ever.

"Listen closely to me friend, you don't own anything here especially not Ginny. You have a lot of learning left to do if you think you can own a woman or anyone else as if their a slave to your beck and call. Don't tell her to be silent and don't you disrespect her! I don't believe she made any mention of wanting to go home so I doubt you'll be dragging her there anytime soon clear?" He accented his point with a nudge of his wand.

"Charlie don't just stand there help me!" Davey pleaded.

Ginny held her breath fearing her brother might do just that, to her relief when Charlie spoke it was with a cool sarcasm. "I don't know boys should we?" He asked his brothers.

Fred shook his head, "He hasn't said anything I don't agree with yet Charlie might as well let the boy go."

Harry nodded and he began to pull Davey up till he was facing Ginny. "Now I'm sorry things turned out this way believe me I don't fault you for wanting her. You'd have to be dead and buried not to love her but I'm sorry old boy I think you went about it all wrong. I think she has something to say to you."

Ginny nodded feeling a wave of warmth go through her at Harry's praise of her, "I'm sorry Davey but I can't marry you."

Harry's grin was nothing short of Triumphant, "Sorry old boy but you heard the woman now get out. And if you continue to bother her after this I will know and I wont be quiet this nice! Now move along."

As soon as Harry released him Davey stumbled forward and pelted back down the drive as if escaping hell itself. Ginny wasn't listing to her brothers remarks on what a greasy rat Davey was she was running towards Harry to throw her arms around his neck.

She hugged him tightly to her and breathed in the clean masculine scent of him. "You were wonderful Harry. I don't think I've ever seen you play the big bad Auror before?"

Harry grinned down at her, "I don't think I've ever needed to outside of the job. He didn't hurt you did he?"

Ginny shook her head as Harry reached out to move a loch of hair from her eyes and tucked it behind her head, "His insulting behavior hasn't hurt me in a long time just annoyed me."

"Good" Harry nodded and on impulse Ginny rose on her tiptoes and their lips met in a kiss of such tenderness it warmed her clear to her toes.

"Here's the part I don't agree with." Fred spoke from behind them and she felt Harry stiffen.

They parted and she saw a grim light of determination in his eyes. He looked down at her, "Ginny?"

"What?" She asked puzzled at his sudden behavior she could practically feel him tensing up beneath her hands as if preparing for a fight.

"Please remember I love you and don't mean to damage any of them but there are just things that have to be done." he sighed and he kissed her lightly on the cheek ignoring the growling of her brothers.

He set her aside and marched past her Ginny watched in surprise as he threw his wand down. "Alright I think it's time we settled this once and for all. And I've always believed actions speak louder then words. I happen to love your sister but I also happen to know I could tell you that all day and that wouldn't matter. So I'm willing to fight for her, I'd fight each and everyone of you but I'm not superhuman so the only thing I ask for is that you come at me one at a time all seven of you at once is a little much for me."

This was met by disapproving calls from the women and hoots of laughter from the men.

"Now he's speaking my language. When we beat the tar out of you Potter will you leave our sister alone?" Fred agreed eagerly.

Harry shook his head, "No actually I told you I love her and even if you win which you wont old man that will just force me to have to elope or something. I'd rather have us come to an agreement now though."

Ginny felt her heart sore at those words and had to resist running to him to throw her arms around him again.

Freds eyes however had narrowed. "You cheeky little blighter! We'll just have to pound you so hard you wont be in any condition to move nevertheless elope."

And with that Fred was charging forward.

Ginny learned something then Fred for all his anger was not a fighter and Harry had always been one. Somewhere along the last seven years he had taken a fighters spirit and fine tuned it as he hit Fred and moved past him with graceful ease it was obvious he was only toying with the older man and not even hitting him hard enough to do more then stun him.

The men of her family groaned and the women began to cheer despite their initial reluctance for this all to turn to violence.

"Your young man knows how to use his fists Ginny." Penny winked at her calling out further encouragement to Harry despite her husbands glare.

"I'm not so sure I should be proud of that" Ginny remarked but she couldn't stop grinning and she happened to be whether she should or shouldn't.

"You let those monsters hurt her without even checking on her" Fred accused taking another swing.

Harry dodged it to whirl around behind him and rap him soundly on the ear with his right fist. "I know and I cant say anything to make up for that. But I will never let it happen again."

Harry moved like lightning away from Fred's attempt to tackle his legs and wrapped him hard on the left ear this time. "I won't let anything take her from me, not death eaters, not even you. I'll protect her with magic, with my bare hands if I have to, and that's a promise."

Fred trying to take a swing at Harry's head missed yet again as Harry dodged him and his momentum carried him forward strait into Harry's waiting knee. He let out a harsh cry as the breath was punched from his Stomach and he lay there for a moment trying to get it back.

"It's not a fair fight Harry's had training." Percy pouted and Penny rolled her eyes.

"He's an Auror of course he's had training you knew that too late to back down now." Angelina laughed.

"He happens to be making chump change of your husband" George pointed out.

Angelina shrugged, "He's not really hurting anything more then his pride. Fred has enough to spare believe me."

Harry stepped back from where Fred lay groaning on the ground and looked up. "any other reasons I shouldn't be with her?"

Charlie threw down his own wand and marched forward. "Yeah I have some Potter." Charlie threw a punch to Harry's left and when Harry dodged right he was surprised to find Charlie's fist slamming into his side.

Charlie wasn't playing nice like Harry had done with Fred either it stung and knocked the breath out of his lungs. Charlie was grinning at him "I work with Dragons Harry I know how to be quick and anticipate an attack. I won't be as easy as Fred."

Harry dodged a kick to his knee and this time was prepared when Charlie quickly attacked his other one. Harry swung around and rammed his elbow hard into Charlie's side satisfied with the other mans grunt of pain. "You haven't told me what you have against me."

Charlie swung at his head missed, then rammed him in the stomach with his knee. "Your dangerous, and your hunted you could widow her long before she's ready."

Charlie saw Harry's leg sweep around to kick his feet out from under him and dodged feeling elation, he might just win this fight.

And then it was as if Harry stopped playing.

Suddenly he was a whirl wind of punches and movement that he couldn't even comprehend what direction they came from. Charlie could only suffer the brunt of those blows as he blinked in surprise, Potter had been toying with him the same way he'd toyed with Fred.

And then a fist connected with his eye, and Charlie saw stars and pain lanced through his head and he staggered back. "I won't claim to have it all together or not be dangerous. But I'm not to her, I'm not going to hurt her and if I'm willing to beat the tar out a brother she loves and is more then likely to be angry at me for hurting then there is no way in hell I'm letting something as mere as a nightmare or some dark wizard keep us apart." He could no longer see Harry but he could hear his words like a declaration from a mountain top.

As Charlie staggered back and away from him into the waiting arms of his wife Harry turned to face the rest of them again.

"I'm still taking complaints if you have one?" he asked quietly.

Ron stepped forward shaking off Hermione's hold on his arm. "I have one" He advanced on Harry in a clumsy fighting stance, but for all that it was untrained it was affective he scored a hit and a hard one to Harry's midsection.

"I have a complaint against the way you broke her heart." Ron said slamming his hand across Harry's cheek.

Ginny grit her teeth trying not to shout for him to stop and rush to Harry's defense. There was no reason Harry couldn't deal with Ron as quickly as he had her other brothers why was he letting Ron beat him?

"I have a complaint against the way you hurt Hermione, the way you hurt her when she was willing to risk her own life and watch me risk mine for yours!" Ron shouted again kicking him.

"I have a complaint against the way you made me care about you! I cared about you so much I would have followed you to hell and back and you tossed it in my face." Ron didn't hit him again he seemed unable to do more but stand there and shout now. " I have a complaint against the way I wanted you to suffer for what you did, the way I wanted to hate you but just couldn't. I have a complaint for all the nights I spent staring out my window and praying that you wouldn't die out there!"

Harry and Ron stood facing each other Harry bruised from where Ron had punched him and Ron pale and shaking as he yelled at him.

"Do you know what that was like Harry, wanting to hate you when I believed what you'd said about me that I was useless and that you didn't need me. It was horrible I wanted to hate you so much but underneath it all I just couldn't. I wanted you to come back so badly, I wanted to go after you I wanted to follow you but I had no idea where you were or if you even still lived. Do you know what it was like to walk past her room and hear her crying when she thought no one could hear her. I most definitely have a complaint against that."

There was absolute silence and Ginny waited her breath coming raggedly staring in wonder at her brother. He had always seemed to hate Harry solidly, all this time it had not been so, he had still loved Harry.

Harry took a step forward, "No I don't know what it was like for you. I only know what it was like to be separated from you, from her and from myself. I did it to spare you hell, you say you would have followed me and believe me that meant the world to me but I couldn't let you do it so I hurt you."

Harry's knees began to shake but he braced himself and continued to stand, "I don't regret doing it. You would have died had you come. They ambushed me Ron when I was unprepared because I was alone I didn't have to watch anyone die had any of you been with me you would have died either quickly or slowly just to torture me. They tried everything in their arsenal that night to break me and it worked, even though I managed to kill him they had still broken me. I'm sorry if I continued to hurt you after that but that wasn't my intention in leaving you and you don't know how sorry I am that it happened that way. All I can promise you is that I'm not broken now and all I can say is that you, Hermione and Ginny complete me and I'm never pushing you away again."

Ginny lifted a trembling hand to cover her mouth to keep her cry inside, what had happened to him? This was just another clue that whatever had happened to him it had been terrible, and Ginny had the feeling it was crucial somehow.

Ron was blinking at him in surprise "Harry I…"

"I'm to blame for all of this Ron I know it, my choice set it all in motion all I'm asking is that you let it be my choice that sets it right. I love her, and I love you and Hermione. I'm sorry I cant say it enough to erase the past but I want us to have a future."

A heart could have stopped in the silence that followed and everyone could have heard it.

Hermione let out a cry and went flying towards Harry and into his arms breaking the pregnant silence. "Oh Harry you idiot! Don't you ever do something so foolish again, ever."

Ron looked rather sheepish but a slow smile was spreading on his face. "She's right. Don't do something like that again you nearly killed all of us. I'm sorry Harry, sorry for not thinking about what facing him alone might have meant for you."

Hermione laughed as the two men clasped hands and Ron pulled Harry suddenly into a hugged. "Men ." She sighed. Then she turned on Ron. "Can we get married now?"

Ron grinned at her and glanced at Harry. "That depends."

Harry blinked at him then smiled and he turned and his eyes met hers.

Ginny felt her heart soar and she flew into his arms like a winged thing, nestled into his embrace felt like finally coming home.

"Well Ginny what do you think?" He murmured into her hair spreading kisses down her face.

"Is that a proposal?" She grinned up at him.

"yes…well?" Harry urged her.

_Nothing would make her happier…._

_This is too fast something is a little off about all of this,_

_I don't care I love him and I'm keeping him._

_This isn't over yet…far from over you cant win this easy, nothing comes this easy…_

_I'll face that when it comes._

"Yes" Ginny answered him.

There was an immediate cheer from the women and Harry was swinging her up into his arms and whatever doubts she had left her mind. Her answer was yes and a thousand times yes.

**Change of view**

His wife was grinning like a cat who had gotten into the crème and Arthur sighed accepting the inevitable.

"They're being rash you know, I wont lie and say I was wrong about the boy but I'm right about the trials they will have to face." Arthur whispered in her ear.

Molly smiled fondly up at him and nodded, "oh I know it problems don't just disappear; and Harry has enough of them to drive any woman away. Ginny's made of stronger stuff though and she loves him, you know what I always say Love can whether all season. They've been in winter I think it might be spring again."

Arthur frowned, "I'm worried that it might be an early one though. You know how sometimes it can seem like after a long winter spring is finally coming and then it snows and you find out you were wrong."

Molly shivered with apprehension glancing at Harry who held her daughter in the crook of his arm, Ron had his arm clamped around Hermione and their family was gathered around him.

"You may be right Arthur dear in fact I think you might be I think this is a false start and Ginny and Harry still have a little bit of winter to face. But spring no mater how harsh the winter always comes around sooner or later. Look at them Arthur they belong like that and I'll see to it they stay that way."

And Arthur knew he didn't have much to worry about when Molly got that determined glint in her eyes there was nothing stopping her.

**END PART ONE**


	13. Chapter 13: The begining

-1"Are you nervous?" Hermione asked her from the bed across the room. The two women were both in their nightwear, Hermione's being silk pajama bottoms with a matching top and Ginny's was just an overly large t-shirt and cotton shorts. The room they were sharing was in a small inn not to far from a quaint if sweet little church. This church had seen a lot of Weasley's go through it in the past couple of years and tomorrow it would see two more enter holy matrimony.

She knew at this very moment the small inn was crammed with their family and numerous wedding guests. What had been two months of hurried and flurried planning was finally going to bear fruit tomorrow and as the two brides to be sat on their beds waiting for their maids of honor to get back with the spirits Ginny felt butterflies launch in her stomach.

"Nervous, I'm only getting married in the morning. There's only a million things that could go wrong. Mum ordered some horrendous singing cake that rumor has it the twins have jinxed to sing I changed the brides Diaper and she still stinks. Never mind the fact that Harry and I haven't trully been alone since we decided to get married the watchdogs haven't called off the hunt yet you'd think If I didn't walk down the isle perfectly pure the world would end." Ginny sighed.

Hermione giggled feeling for her friend, somewhere along the line after the awkwardness of welcoming Harry back into the fold they realized that Harry and Ginny were adults. Ginny wasn't a little girl and shock of all shocks she might have a woman's desire of the man who was to be her husband. Well that just didn't sit right with the Weasley brothers.

"if this is their last act as overbearing big brothers then they're giving it all they're worth. The other day Ron actually knocked at Harry's apartment when I was over there on the pretense of being in the nationhood. Honestly it was after midnight I don't know who he thought he was kidding, he stayed for an hour then of course I couldn't stay without making it glaringly obvious my intent." Ginny sighed again propping her head up with her knees.

"Poor you well by tomorrow night you wont have to wonder anymore you and Harry will finally be alone without a million people swarming around offering well meant advice marital tips and the like. It will just be the two of you in his apartment. Have you sold yours?" Hermione asked.

Ginny nodded, "Sale went through last week. I've been living at home since then. I tried to swing living with Harry, you'd think since we were getting married in a week it wouldn't be that big of a deal. Dad look like I'd proposed flying to the states to take a ride on a hippogriff. Charlie nearly popped an eye socket glaring at me."

Hermione was just about to answer when the door burst open and a Giggling Jane and a blushing Corry came flouncing into their room both of them in their nightwear. Jane was holding a bottle of bubbling champagne in one hand and guiding several levitating glasses with her wand with the other. Luna was grinning ear to ear carrying several wrapped boxes under her arm.

**Change of view.**

On minute Harry was standing at the window of his room in the end seriously contemplating sneaking over to Ginny's room and kidnapping her. They could elope and get this over with without the madness of a double wedding and their friends and family making everything a circus.

The next someone was grabbing him from behind and dragging him backwards into the room.

"Well for a groom you sure don't look too spiffy Potter. Contemplating the fall are you, don't jump old boy marriage to Ginny won't be as bad as all that." he recognized Freds voice as he deposited him in the middle of the room.

"I don't know Fred, Ginny's a mean hexer. If I were you Potter if she asks you to take out the trash take it out or she'll have your head on backwards or something." George offered in an amiable sort of way.

Bill was walking through the door a crate of fire whisky under his arm followed by Charlie who was carrying a long thin box.

A moment later Dean, Devon and Seamus followed grinning from ear to ear.

"your last night of freedom Potter are you sure you want to go through with this?"

**Change of view.**

"Enough chit chat ladies, this is your last night as baccalaureates! It's time we enjoyed it don't you think? And like the men that means a lot of drinking and raunchy talk." She gushed wiggling her eyebrows.

This sent Corry and the others bursting into giggles as they formed a circle in the middle of the room and Jane began to pour.

"So what did we miss?" Corry asked both of them, flipping her blonde hair..

Hermione took a sip of champagne and grinned, "poor Ginny hasn't had a chance to jump Harry's bones just yet. The hound dogs are having a last hurrah."

Jane shook her head, "That's a crime, I think it might actually be a sin. You've been engaged for two months and you still haven't sampled the goods?"

Ginny tossed her pillow at her friend, "Harry isn't a piece of meat! And no in a way I'm kind of happy it's happening this way it makes everything rather suspenseful."

"I disagree, Harry's definitely a piece and if you weren't such a good friend and married I'd do a little sampling myself." Corry smirked.

Ginny knew Corry was joking but she still felt an urge to stake a claim. "Down girl don't make me start marking my territory."

Jane shuddered, "heaven forbid the men do enough of that already. You should have seen Seamus the other day when I was flirting with that hunky Yankee. I swear the man got just as primitive as the rest of his sex."

Hermione rolled her eyes, "Oh you know you love it. I can't figure you two out you flirt like mad but are you actually together."

Jane shrugged, "Not exactly. Seamus is never officially with anyone. No my funny friend and I are just friends with benefits he seems to prefer it that way."

Ginny arched an eyebrow, "And your ok with this?"

Jane snorted, "bloody hell Ginny what do I look like to you? If I wanted a little teasing and a little romp here or there to entertain me I'd watch a bloody movie. Seamus has contented bachelor written all over him, I just need a little time to convince him he's not so content. Hence the hunky Yankee. It's rather gratifying when they growl and hiss and beat at their chests when another male gets too near don't you think ladies."

Corry and Hermione giggled and Ginny rolled her eyes. "it's bloody annoying is what it is."

"Enough about me this is your wedding eve, any questions or concerns?" Jane asked.

Hermione snorted, "you've never been married isn't this Mrs. Weasley's line?"

"Consider me the understudy then, Mrs. Weasley couldn't make it she's too busy keeping this show on the road and the grooms from sneaking over to see the brides too early. That's known to cause doom in marriages you know." Jane shrugged tossing back another glass.

"I have one, am I expected to have dinner ready at a certain time? Bat my eyelashes a certain way? Vacuum in pearls perhaps?" Ginny asked batting her eyelashes demurely.

Corry gave a snort of laughter spraying her champagne out her nose, which sent the rest of them into fits of laughter.

"Or how about this one how do you explain to your groom when your brothers hover about to make sure he doesn't make a wrong move. I swear they mean to referee the whole thing."

**Change of view**

Harry's head was lightly buzzing and he couldn't tell exactly what was so funny but as he lay on the floor nursing a bottle of fire whisky he obviously had found something funny as he was still wheezing a little from his laughter.

"I'm telling you I was so bloody nervous I almost swallowed my tongue. She must have thought I'd never even seen a woman before." Charlie was sighing still laughing a little.

From on top Ron's bed where Bill lay sprawled there came an sarcastic snort, "Maybe because you hadn't. Those banshees you dated before Clarita could hardly be classified as women. I swear they were half dragon."

This was greeted by more teasing and laughter and Charlie bore it with patience. "My point is Potter don't be disappointed if you make too big a fool of yourself tomorrow night. It happens to the best of us." He advised.

Fred lifted himself off of the ground where he was sprawled and grinned down at Harry, "well Potter? Do you need us along to give you a few pointers. We'd be glad to show you how it's done you know coach you along."

Their was a groan from his brothers and several pillows came up to whack him in the face. "That's our sister you pervert."

"yeah I don't particularly want to have that image burned into my mind. No offense Harry but when you two have rugrats I'll just pretend they're adopted." Ron shuddered.

"You on the other hand, if there is anyone who needs to be taught how to treat a woman it's you ikel Ronnikens." George sneered rounding on Ron.

"Ha I know more then you think." Ron said with a smug grin.

"What did Granger open up a text book and tell you all about it?" Fred sneered.

More pillows flew and Harry laughed as Ron tackled his brother and feathers began to fly.

**Change of view.**

"Open your gift now, it's from the both of us we got one for both of you. Ginny you open yours first though I want to see your face." Corry giggled excitedly thrusting the package towards Ginny.

Ginny had an idea of what kind of a gift this would be wedding eve parties between peers tended to be full of innuendo.

She was not quite expecting to unwrap the sheer white lace that folded up looked like a napkin but unfolded she could see was actually night ware. The outfit would barely cover anything and what it did cover the lace was sheer enough that it was meant more to tease then actually shield anything from view.

Ginny could feel her face flame as she shoved the skimpy lacy thing back into it's box. "no way! No way, I wouldn't even know what to do with that!"

Jane and Corry burst into giggles and a speculative glint came into Hermione's eyes. "Harry might have a few ideas, why don't you wear it and ask?"

She felt her face grow even hotter. Her eyes flickerd back to the box.

_Perhapes…._

She frowned picking it up again examining it. Spread out the lace looked like bikinie bottoms. Then it dawnd on her.

"uh…Jane your missing half."

**Change of view**

"Open it fellows it's a pre-wedding gift from Jane and me." Seamus said shoving the tiny square package into Harry's hands and another into Ron's.

Harry slowly unwrapped his box and frowned in puzzlement. It looked like a lace napkin was bundled up inside the box and Harry didn't think he was a he-man or anything but lace napkins were hardly his thing.

Next to him Ron let out a low whistle his face going as red as his hair as he pulled his completely from the box. His was pink lace and unfolded Harry could see it was actually the top to a woman's set of…

Harry was sure he had just put Ron's blush to shame as his entire face heated.

"Tell me Ginny doesn't have the other half of that?" Charlie groaned.

Fred was grinning, " Still think they'll be adopting old man?" he turned towards Seamus "where'd you get that Seamus I might just put in a request for my wife could you imagine Angjie in something like that. She'd be divine."

"No I can't and I don't need to." Bill replied cryptically. "I'm trying to ignore the fact that my baby sister is going to be wearing a napkin in front of a man. I don't need images of you and your wife dancing in my head to make me sicker."

"Actually half a napkin because only the tops here." Ron pointed out helpfully.

Bill sat up quickly. "Wait if you're not going to see her until tomorrow how is she going to put the whole thing on?"

There was silence and Seamus grinned like a cat.

"She's not."

There was an immediate explosion.

"Like Hell she's not, Give me that Potter I'll deliver it myself if I have too!"

**Change of Scene **

There had been many a sad wedding in the history of man kind but the man who waited and watched the small church from the tree line was determined that today's would put the rest to shame. He curled his fists a snarl of rage curling his lips.

"I say we disappoint the happy groom to be, I say we sneak through the back doors and get the bride first. If we dumped her body at his feet it might begin to bring justice." His partners voice cackled into his ear but his eyes did not waver from the church.

"You are a fool Crabbe a fool. Nothing will ever bring justice, bring back what Potter took away. Nothing will ever cool my hatred for that man not even the death of all he holds dear could bring that. Not even his life leaving his body beneath my hands could ever do that. That man cost me my life! I will have his to return the favor, today he has made himself and all those he holds dear a target, I say we oblige him."

**Change of view**

Harry couldn't believe his good fortune in this moment as he stood waiting at the small churches white alter decorated so simply yet so enchantingly that even despite the hailstorm going on in his stomach he had to admire Mrs. Weasley's handy work.

The soft white walls were dotted with splashes of pale pink and blue flowers which Harry would never be able to need providing a sudden rainbow, and burst of scent as he passed each color. Harry had been passing one particular cluster of lilies with crimson petals on account of his pacing back and forth between the columns of the huge ivy covered arch erected in front of the alter.

Ron stood stiller on the other side of the arch but judging by the gray pallor of his face and the clear and tight lines of tension in his arms Harry suspected it was only because his friend knew if he moved it would be to bolt from the church.

So Harry paced and Ron stood poised on the edge of fleeing for his life. Their guest were gathered In the pews already talking lightly and merrily amongst themselves. The long line of grooms men stood to Harry's left watching him pace with amusement.

"Don't even think about it Potter no matter how far you run I guarantee you we'll catch you; and only if Ginny doesn't first." George smirked at him, then he turned to Ron. "Good God man sit down before you fall down!"

Ron turned a pale shade of green and even George who had been teasing about running was surprised when Ron surged forward and bolted down the isle.

"Bloody hell Ron that little termite must have dung for brains, he's actually making a run for it!" Fred gasped watching as Ron went streaking past him.

Harry although he had seen it coming was just as surprised he was nervous too, his body was practically having a mutiny urging him to run but he wasn't actually going to do it. He hadn't run from anything in a real long time and he'd be damned if he started again on his wedding day.

"Don't just stand there blinking you lot go get him!" Bill hissed beginning to bolt down the isle after his brother.

Harry groaned as he ran after Ron thinking any minute now the wedding march was going to begin and the brides would come through the door and there would be no grooms awaiting them.

**Change View**

He stiffened as the church doors burst open fearing they had been detected. Potter was an Auror which meant right now the church was infested with them. One of the reasons why storming into the church to murder the bride was not a good idea. Only a fool like Crabbe would have suggested it.

No he had a much more subtle death for Potter in mind, one that would cause him no small amount of pain and in fact would cause him the greatest pain of all. Potter did not know what it was like to loose everything, the world had been handed to him on a silver platter and it was time someone taught him not to mess with his betters.

But no it was just the Weasley boy running as if hell itself was on it's heels from the church. He smirked, had even that filthy blood traitor been unable to tie himself to the mud running in Grangers veins? Several Aurors did come running after him along with the rest of the Weasley brood.

And Harry.

An instant spark of rage sparked and caught in his gut as he fought the urge not to leap from his hiding place and exact his rage on the mans person.

Bide your time, you will make him wish he had never been born by the time you are through with him. You will take away everything just as he took away everything. It will take time, it will take patience. It would take years. Potter had cost him his money his wealth, his friends, his son his wife and even his sanity it seemed. No he did not still think he was sane his thirst for vengeance was the only thing that kept him grounded.

Potter had cost him all that and more, so Potter would loose them all.

Today he would plant the first seed.

"Get him Malfoy why are you just standing there get him lets kill him." Crabee insisted nearly leaping from his hiding place.

He grabbed onto the mans cloaked arm shoving him brutally back down still hissing on a whisper. "Do you want to get us both killed fool! That church is crawling with Aurors so attack him openly be my guest! But I'll kill you before you can reach him. Potter will die but not yet, he must suffer first Potter will learn what it's like to suffer for I will teach him."

He turned back to watch the activity on the church lawn the Weasley boy was on his knees now too of his brothers holding him up as he tossed up whatever he had eaten for breakfast. The others milled around him some amused some less then. He gripped his wand tighter raising it ready to cast the spell and plant the first seed.

Potter was talking to one of his Auror partners and one of the nameless freckled faces of the Weasley brood was having an agument with another. He snarled they all looked the same he couldn't even tell them apart the nasty blood traitors he was tempted to blast them too just for the fun of it to watch their mind open up to what they feared most. To have no barrier between reality and illusion, between waking an dreaming.

A cruel smile spread on his lips why had he not thought of it before?

"Mirrodiera encantra" He whispered swirling his wand in a complicated pattern. A thin stream of pale blue shot from his wand its vibrant color only visible in the shade. When it shot into the sunlight however it all but disappeared. He could tell the moment it struck the nameless Weasley boy because he flinched as if he had been bitten by a bug and slapped at the back of his shoulder where the spell had connected. He knew the only hint of the spell hitting him would be a small circle of blue like the marks of an entry wound on the back of his dress robes.

**Change of view**

Harry did not pity Ron who was apparently puking up everything he had ever eaten on the lawn and suffering his brothers teasing as he did it.

"Poor little blighter, wouldn't want to be his throat just now must be raw." George whom was just behind him commented to George who was across from him.

Fred shook his head laughing, "Well Bill was the pacer back and forth and back again he made Harry look like the Queens guard. Charlie was another gut thrower though I have to admit not this bad. Percy was the nail biter he stood there looking as calm as day but when you looked at his finger I swear I thought he'd bitten off the tips. You were the bed wetter, you didn't think I wouldn't notice old boy?"

George turned bright red his eyes darting around franticly to judge who had heard lucky for him most everyone except a few had their attention on Ron.

Harry arched an eyebrow. "You did what now?" He asked disbelieving.

"He was so nervous the night before I thought… Ouch" Fred's teasing voice faltered as he suddenly twitched and slapped at his back as if a bug had bitten him

"You alright there mate?" Harry asked, Mosquitoes weren't native to this area and being that it was early fall they wouldn't be in season even had they been.

Fred frowned moving away from the spot he had been standing in as if fearing the lone insect would return to pester him. "yeah don't know exactly what just bit me though." He grumbled his eyes darting around as if he would spot the culprit buzzing about.

Harry shrugged a bug bite was nothing to speculate over he was thinking just as he turned to see if Ron was back on his feet, as he turned he felt a slight pinch in his shoulder as if something had burrowed into his skin. The feeling made his skin crawl, he shuddered and slapped at his shoulder.

George eyed both he and Fred with disbelief, "Are the both of you ok? It's clear and crisp out here and your both slapping at yourselves like your trekking through the Amazon?"

"Something just bit me!" Harry insisted.

George rolled his eyes, "And like I said there are no insects out here its late fall, blimey Harry we've got Ron tossing his innards and you seeing things."

Harry was about to reply when his attention was drawn by the sound of someone clearing their throat. His eyes were drawn to the chapel doors and his breath caught in his throat. Standing in the arch of the chapel doors were the two brides but his eyes were riveted on the one who's red tresses spilled out from beneath her veil and who's hands were on her slender hips in an obvious display of frustration.

Gowned in white as befitting a bride he could see the hem of her skirts peaking out beneath the white silk over robes that were merely a shimmer and a thought instead of actual cloth. She wore a simple strand of pearls around her throat and was otherwise unadorned.

It was all she needed, in fact Harry believed in that moment that she could have been standing there in a burlap sack and he would still have thought her breath taking.

"Harry James Potter you aren't running out on me are you?" She demanded crossing her arms.

She looked angry as well any bride who walked down the isle to find her groom missing would be and beneath the anger Harry could see a flash of relief in her eyes. What must it have been like for her to walk down the isle and not see him there?

Harry came quickly to her side and clasped both her hands in his, "Never, Ron had a bit of an…um.." He glanced at Hermione who rolled her eyes and sighed.

_How do you tactfully say, Sorry your groom wasn't waiting for you the thought of marriage to you made him violently ill._

"This is all so very flattering." She muttered looking non too pleased with her husband to be.

Bill who was helping Ron stand and cleaning his robes with a flick of his wand gave her an apologetic grimace, "I think it's the thought of being married in general that has him sick."

Hermione arched an eyebrow, "oh, I see that sounds loads better. This will be a story for our children your father opposed marriage so…oh for goodness sakes Ronald!"

At the sound of the word children Ron's sickly green parlor had turned rapidly to ashen gray and he'd swooned on his feet as if to faint. With a cry of disgust Hermione turned and marched back into the church. Harry had to fight down laughter, he knew now was not he time. Taking Ginny's hand in his own he gave it a squeeze delighting in the way when her eyes met his the warmed with shared humor.

"Want to walk down the isle together this time?" he asked her nodding towards the doors.

"That really isn't done you know." Ginny pointed out with a grin.

"When have we ever done things by the way others do them?" Harry dismissed that notion with a grin of his own.

Ginny smiled and nodded, as they turned to go back in the church they both saw Bill shake Ron rather harshly. "Pull it together! You're letting your nerves ruin your wedding day!"

Harry saw Ron glance around as if just realizing Hermione was no longer there and he cringed. He pushed out of Bills grasp and rushed up the steps and past Harry and Ginny into the church.

Their wedding guests were by now thoroughly confused and some very much amused and entertained by all the running back and forth of brides and grooms. Harry heard one old witch say to her companion that even the Twins wedding had not had so many shenanigans.

Ron ran up the isle to he had caught up to Hermione and grasped at her hand she tried to slap it away but he held on tight, in fact Harry grinned, his friend looked like if he dared to let go he'd flee the church again.

"Have you got a hold of yourself?" Hermione asked him on a whisper that carried despite her effort.

"No but, I've got a hold of you, and that's all I've ever really wanted anyway." Ron whispered back and despite his slightly green tinge he was looking at her with such warmth and holding on with such determination that Harry saw something in his best friends eyes melt as she shook her head at him.

"oh Ronald." she sighed lacing her fingers with his. She glanced back at them a bright smile spreading on her face. "lets walk down the isle together, the four of us."

Harry couldn't think of an idea that fit more, with Ginny on his arm he walked up until he and Ron were side by side he Ginned at his best mate. "you ready for this mate?"

"oh God I hope" Ron muttered under his breath.

Harry threw back his head and laughed. A moment later the others joined him.

After the laughter of the brides and Grooms had faded Mrs. Weasley signaled the choir and as their singing filled the church the four of them walked down the isle.

**Change of view**

"What do we do now Malfoy, can we kill him now."

A smile of anticipation spread on the blonde mans thin lips as he listened to the music and revelry coming from the reception going on inside the church and spilling out onto the church lawns. Potter looked so brilliantly happy standing beneath the trees poising with his bride for photo's. The man practically glowed with satisfaction and there was a softness to him that he did not recognize.

_Go ahead Potter the more you love the chit the greater your pain will be when I take her from you. Her and everything you took from me. Wife, children, home…I will make you loose it all. And then I will take your life._

His smile turned into an out right cackel.

"No my dear Crabbe, we wait. We wait."


	14. Chapter 14: Heaven and Hell

"Uncle Potter why are you buying that?" His ten year old neice Rubella asked not at all shyly. Then again Bella had outgrown her shyness rather quickly after Harry had become a member of the Weasley family. Harrry didn't delude himself by marrying Ginny he felt rather strangely like the bride taking on the name of her husband rather then the other way around.

Trully he wouldn't have had it any other way, he had an abundance of brothers cousins aunts and uncles even parents where he had never had them before. And judging by the way Bella had clung to him since thier first meeting six years ago he even had a favorite Niece. Shy four year old was gone to be replaced by the coltish ten year old who by all apearances was doing her best to turn out like her favorite uncle. Bella had insisted on cutting her hair short and it often stuck out in chopy disguntled waves much to her mothers dispair.

Her beautiful soft blonde hair and bright blue eyes were a testoment to her Veela blood and Fleur wanted her daughter to attend the school she had attended as was only proper for a young lady. Bella was having none of it, if ever there was a tom boy then Bella was it. Her cloths were often dirty her pants often ripped even now there was a smuge of dirt on her cheek. Bella had been axcepted to Hogwarts and would be attending her fist year this year.

Harry chuckled every time he looked at her, she looked dainty as a pixie but had a mean kick and an even tougher additude.

"I'm buying this because your aunt Ginny asked for it, and we all know what aunt Ginny asks for she gets" Harry winked at her.

Bella wrinkled her nose, "You're a push over when it comes to women Uncle Harry. What do you do when you face down female dark wizards?" She asked shaking her head.

Harry's Job as an Auror never failed to facinate her and she had boldy at the age of six pronounced that she was going to be the greatest Auror England had ever seen.

"Ah but not just any women Bella, just the lucky ladies in my family. Dark wizard ladies arnt nearly as friendly as you our Aunt Ginny." Harry grinned. He couldn't imagine Bellatrix or any other dark witch asking for a ride on his broom the way Bella did or sitting with him on the patio and watching the sunset the way Ginny and Hermione did. There was a definit distinction between the two.

When the witch at the counter handed him his bag full of purcheses he gave her a bright smile knowing Ginny would be pleased he had been able to find everything on her list. The witch smiled back at him and although he saw nothing wrong with her friendlyness Bella crossed her arms and glared at the witch.

"Your daughters a doll mr Potter" The witch gushed reaching out to pat Bella's golden head.

Bella rolled her eyes and stepped back out of the womans reach. "I'm not his daughter, i'm his niece he's too young to be my father anyway."

The witch seemed happy about this prospect and her eyes flickerd to his hand. Harry felt his face flush a little glad his wedding band was so boldy displaid most women left it at that.

"Thats right he's married to my aunt Ginny everyone knows that so keep your.." Harry clamped his hand over Bella's mouth before she could embaress them both.

"Hardly called for Bella" he mutterd dragging the young girl out of the shop. He couldn't stop grinning not because of the witches attentions but because of Bella's protectivness. Harry was in no danger of straying from his wife and indeed had Ginny been here she would have laughed and teased him.

"Thanks for defending my honor in there Bella." Harry smiled down at her and she gave him a cheeky grin.

"Any time uncle Harry. Do we have to go home just yet?" She turned those big blue eyes on him and Harry didn't even try to resist. He took her hand in his and pretended to think about it.

"I suppose we could get a few treats at Honeydukes what do you say?" He asked tentivly as if she might not agree.

As his niece whooped with joy and Harry laughed as she tugged him chirply along Harry Potter knew exactly what all the books talked about when they mentioned heaven on earth.

**Change of Scene**

Ginny couldn't help but feel as if she should be swimming in a tank somewhere with thousands of people in bleachers watching and pointing. She felt like a whale and when she dared walk outside on the streets outside their home in Glaciers End she felt as if like the poor creatures in muggel aquariums as if everyone was watching and making sport of her. The reason for her feeling so whalish was simple, she was more then eight months pregnant and although the Mediwizard guiding her through her second pregnancy assured her she was not carrying twins Ginny had to argue with the man.

She was humongous, felt infact like a walking marshmallow. Ginny Weasley hadn't felt pretty in months even though her husband of six years insisted that she was by his standards divine. Looking at herself in the mirror she had to wonder at her husbands standards.

Her hair was in a messy pony tail. Waddling around their house, as undignified as it was Ginny refused to be seen as helpless, left her little time for vanity. She wore no makeup and her slip on sandals were the best she could manage when she could barely reach her feet anymore. She hadn't seen her ankles in months but they often ached and she knew they were swollen.

Harry could insist all he wanted but until she delivered the septuplets judging by her size she must be carrying, she would not feel pretty or desirable. Even if Harry had a way of looking at her that made he feel just that.

_Don't start that again, that's what got you into this state in the first place._

Ginny sighed shaking her head fondly, Harry must be crazy to find her attractive even when she was mammoth and by her opinion far from attractive. She loved him because he did though even if she couldn't fathom how.

Her stomach rumbled and she felt a not so light kick reminding her that the Baby was very much awake and aware and wanting to be fed. Ginny felt sorry for Harry her constant need to be snacking on something was embarrassing but entirely his fault in her opinion. She was convinced it had to be at least nine children she was eating for even Rory had not required as much food as this child seemed to be demanding. Her mom just laughed and told her that was the nature of twins.

Harry had taken the last month off of work to help her at home even though Ginny insisted against it. It was no small thing Harry had been given his own team to lead, truly he had been offered one many times but hd always declined. With Riordan on the way Harry had thought it smart to take a higher paying Job and had finally accepted. That had been four years ago and now with their second child on the way Harry was in line for another promotion. Taking a month off of work was no small thing, but Harry had just smiled at her fondly and taken the time off anyway. At this very moment he was running mundane errands for her, she smiled warmth gathering in the pit of her stomach at the thought of her husband. Harry was wonderful when he wanted to be.

Other times however he made her want to strangle him, like the way he insisted on coddling and protecting her at all times even at expense to himself. If telling her he had been injured at work might cause Ginny some distress Harry would simply not tell her. The last time he had pulled that particular stunt and Jane had informed her of it Ginny had nearly hexed him in her aggravation.

As far as she knew when Harry was hurt now he told her but there was no give with him when it came to his nightmares. In truth the entire time they were married he hadn't seemed at all plagued by them it was as if when he married her they had lost their hold on him, they'd just simply gone away. Still Harry refused to relive any of the memories buried within him even with her and that aggravated and concerned her. Would Harry ever truly be free of their power if he kept them hidden and buried?

Her thoughts were interpreted with the sound of the front door swinging open, laughter and the exited chattering of her five year old son Riordan Avery Potter, or to those that new and loved him Rory. Ginny smiled trying to reduce her waddle as much as possible to greet her sons return from his outing with his favorite aunt and his favorite cousin. Frankie was in his second year at Hogwarts this year proudly continuing a long line of Gryffindors. He was young enough to still cater to the whims of a little boy playing outrageous games even if only in fond indulgence of a younger cousin but old enough to still inspire awe in her son at his seeming larger then life presence.

Seeing Hermione in the front hall helping Rory out of his muddy shoes a redheaded mop of carroty curls strapped and bundled to her back made Ginny smile. Frankie was leaning nonchalantly in a poise that Ginny recognized in youth with a fond smile. In three months Frankie would be thirteen and he was already displaying signs of the changes being a teenager brought to childhood.

His shirt tails were un-tucked his pants unnecessarily loose on his frame, his hair was shaggy and hadn't seen a pair of scissors in a great while. The freckles of his youth had seemed to fade in age or maybe the tan hue of his skin from so much time spent outdoors had evened them out. His hair as he matured had seemed to turn a red gold and was naturally streaked with golden highlights. He was going to be as tall as his father had in fact shot up several inches this summer alone, and according to Fleurs proud boasting was just as accomplished as his father on a broom.

Ginny didn't doubt it, after all Frankie had been joyriding on one since he was six and no amount of punishment or warning had kept him off of it since. His pension for practical jokes and mischief had not mellowed with age the boy still did his two favorite uncles proud.

Hermione was indeed scolding him even as she helped Rory stand up and slide his shoes in the shoe rack. "It wasn't funny Francis, that poor muggle woman will be searching for her dog and worrying about him."

Frankie rolled his eyes, looking bored with his aunts scolding. When Rory giggled at the memory of whatever Frankie had done to the poor pooch in question Frankie gave him a wink.

Ginny grinned finally close enough to talk to them, "Welcome back, you behaved yourself didn't you Frankie?"

Frankie grinned sheepishly and Rory shook his head in excitement his mess of raven curls flopping as he shook it. "Mummy Frankie turned a dog into a purse! It was funny mummy but aunt Mione didn't like it."

When Ginny would have laughed Hermione shot her a hot glance. "Don't encourage him, that could be classified as muggle taunting in the Ministry." She turned on Frankie then, "That's a class one offense Francis it would break your mothers heart if you…"

Frankie sighed pushing away from the wall, "Relax Aunt Hermione I was hardly muggle taunting. Her yappy little dog bit me and I took away it's teeth for awhile that's all. She'll take her purse home and sooner or later it will turn back into her dog she might be a little surprised but no harm done."

Rory giggled again and Ginny had to force herself to look stern.

Hermione was far from amused, "Francis do you realize the Ministry will have to send someone down to do memory charms because of this? If you get hauled in front of a council your mother…"

"Won't know what you don't tell her. Neither will the ministry unless you or Rory go flapping your mouths which I know you wont do so I don't see what all the fuss is about." Frankie pointed out.

Hermione fumed as he laughed when she apparently had no response to this.

"I thought it was funny Aunt Mione and so did those other girls." Rory offered.

Ginny watched her nephew turn pink as Hermione rounded on him again this time a sly smirk on her lips. "Ahh I nearly forgot, I told you to stay with us. I expected Rory to wander off imagine my surprise to find that the twelve year old rather then the five year old had done so. And even more suprising to find him chatting it up with a crowd of girls who were they Frankie?"

Now that she wasn't scolding him Hermione seemed content to use his nickname. Frankie turned an even darker shade of pink and shrugged.

"Just some girls from school, leave it be" He mumbled. When Hermione snorted he glared at his aunt.

"was that what this was all about, were you showing off Frankie. You needn't make mischief to get some girl to notice you mind you." Ginny playfully teased him and watched him darken. It was true though, although only a quarter Veela Frankie still had a golden sort of allure that upon maturity was beginning to make the females of his age buzz around him.

"oh come off it there just girls!" Frankie insisted hotly his cheeks burning as red as his hair.

Ginny laughed.

**Change of scene**

"Ginny you've been standing there for a long time why don't you come to bed?" Harry poked his head around the door of their bedrooms lavatory glancing at where she stood staring with dissatisfaction at her reflection.

She had her red hair bunched up in one fist trying to see if a style would change her reflection.

It didn't. She was still…a marshmallow.

When she sighed letting it drop Harry frowned slightly and moved to stand at her back, she felt his arms slip around her enlarged middle his big male hands splayed across the round expanse, his chin resting on her shoulder.

She couldn't help but be thrilled with the reflection in the mirror now, his coal black hair next to her own red locks was striking and his emerald eyes glittered and heated with such warmth she could only warm in return.

"Ginny Potter you aren't regretting being pregnant are you?" He asked softly.

"Of course not Harry, I love you and Rory and I wouldn't give up the next one if I had to break a weight record. I just sort of miss being well not Mrs. jiggles." She chastised him refuting the very thought of regretting the child she carried. It would never be that she guarded her burden like the treasure it was and thinking about bringing a second child of hers and Harry's into the world made her giddy with delight. Although since she was half convinced it was two and her mother was sure that it was, she was considerably rounder then her last pregnancy and couldn't help but wonder what Harry thought when he looked at her.

"Then I've done something wrong again, is that what has you sighing?" Harry asked slight humor evident in his voice.

Ginny shook her head feeling slightly ashamed of her vanity. In their reflection Ginny could see Harry watching her speculatively. She could tell the moment he understood when she shifted a little to ease the pressure her weight must be causing him.

Ginny could hear him start to chuckle and she felt indignant. It was hardly a laughing matter. Harry was a national Hero, wealthy and extremely good-looking; women surrounded him daily in the hordes and although she never doubted his faithfulness she wouldn't blame him for glancing at slimmer waist lines.

_Oh yes you would who are you kidding you'd box his ears and hex out his eyes if you caught him even peeking at another woman!_

"It's not funny Harry, I look like a walking dough bag. I'm puffy and red faced can you honestly find that attractive?" She angrily insisted.

Harry finally stopped chuckling and pulled her closer, in her belly she felt a slight stirring and a kick. She didn't jump and indeed felt a sense of pleasure as Harry kneaded the spot on her belly where he had felt their baby kick.

"You want my honest Ginny?" He asked turning her around slowly.

Ginny half feared what he might say but swallowed back the lump in her throat and nodded. Harry slowly knelt down on his knees until his face was level with the abdomen that was causing her so much insecurity. Ginny watched as his hands peeled back the layers of her shirt baring her skin to his gaze and her breath caught in her throat at the heat in his glance and the deeper emotion she saw there.

"I've never found you more attractive. Have I ever told you you're intoxicating? You consume my every thought and color my world with your presence without even trying. When you're furious I find you glorious. When you wake up in the morning with your hair askew and smudges on your face and bags beneath your eyes; you tempt me in ways I can't put into words."

Her knees began to shake as he paused his hands beginning to caress the firm mound of her belly wearing a look of total satisfaction and his smile brimming with joy. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to where his hand had been sending shivers up and down her body.

"You're beautiful and every time I look at you I want to thank whatever God wants to hear me. Don't ever think I don't see you just as you are, and that's down right too good for me."

And with that he rose and more gently then Ginny could have thought he cradled her in his arms and pressed his lips to hers. She sighed softly warming to his kiss not believing her good fortune in having him for a husband.

His kiss was tender but soon that undeniable flare of heat and hunger could be felt beneath the tenderness and she knew for a fact that she could look like three marshmallows lumped together and her husband would still desire her. It made her feel giddy, and undeniably loved.

His hands had threaded into her hair now as his lips softly claimed hers, moving over them in slow and languid sweetness that threatened to make her legs give out. She didn't know how he did it but when he lifted her off her feet and into his arms she felt lighter then a feather and threw herself whole heartedly into their heated kiss. She felt his smile beneath her lips and sought to capture it with her own.

He carried her from the loo and into their bedroom and over to the bed. He laid her down on it as if she were priceless china, as if she would shatter if not handled correctly.

As if he treasured her.

"Ginny" his voice was breathy as if he was fighting for breath. His lips were instantly drawn back to hers as if to be separated for even the amount of time it took to form her name was too long.

Her own hands were wrestling with his shirt desperate to feel the familiar heat of his skin, marveling in the softness of his skin tracing every scar on his body with reverence, glad he was safe and whole in her arms. Harry was her world and her heart was so incredibly full of joy in this moment she felt she would burst with it.

Harry drew back giving her one last lingering kiss and Ginny willed herself not to cling to him. She knew she was far too close to her time to do what both of them yearned for and Harry was only looking out for her.

He pressed a kiss to her forehead, "I love you never doubt that." He whispered hoarsely clasping her in his arms.

Ginny Potter was warmed clear to her toes.

**Change view**

"Is it time Malfoy? We have waited so very long!"

"Patience, patience there are still more pieces to put into play but you are right now is the time to make the first move." he whispered stirring the contents of the seeing pool he was watching Potter and his wife the Weasley chit through. It was really a spell cast on water that allowed him to observe anyone he had cast his particular spell to. He had cast this particular spell six years ago at the mans wedding.

He watched Potter and his wife on their bed feeling rage at the mans obvious happiness. He watched them slip off to sleep looking sickeningly content.

His lips curled.

"Yes its time for the first step." And with that he stuck his wand tip in the water of his seeing pool and began to stir. The water turned a deep and bold red thicker then blood.

**Change of scene.**

_He was running not away from something but to something. Desperately running towards it for all that he was worth. He somehow knew the street as Glaciers End even though with the fog he could barely see his own feet pounding against the pavement._

_Fear coursed through his veins pumping his body full of adrenaline making his heart pound a painful rhythm of fear. All around him he could hear the wailing cry of a baby, it eerily echoed and bounced around in the fog. A warning and a beckoning at once._

_He ran on._

"_Harry! Harry Stay away!" _

_Her voice now begging pleading him._

"_Stay away Harry" _

_So shrill her voice as if she was in pain, so very desperate a sound._

_He couldn't stay away, not when she needed him not with the eerie ghostly wailing of an infant crying out to him. Ginny was due soon could she be having there baby? His thoughts raced in his head as he raced down the endless streets never seeming to get nearer to her._

"_GINNY!" He called out her name in desperation as the wailing of the baby increased in pitch and he heard her scream in pain._

_His heart throbbed in acute pain filled desperation to reach her._

_THERE! Emerging from the fog like a specter was their home. He raced up the steps and as he tore open the door and burst inside, a cry of fury and devastation escaped him._

_Ginny lay sprawled on the floor and in this world of gray and fog the only thing of color was red. The red of her hair, and the sickly red of the blood pooling around her body. The wet red covering the tiny body of the newborn that had been torn from her body, red was the stream of blood coming from the stream of blood running in rivulets down it's tiny body._

_Red red red._

_Red was the torn and sightless bundle laying tossed and broken near his wife. His small life snuffed out, torn away at dagger point in defense of his mother. Riordan's raven hair was bathed in the red of his own blood._

_Red red red thick and wet was the blood surrounding him signaling the brutal death of everything he held dear._

_Red red red were the tears that rolled down his cheeks as he sank to his knees uncaring that the man who held his dying child had tossed his newborn away like so much garbage._

_He lay in the red pool as if he could soak himself in it and recapture his dreams._

_Red red red was the hair of the man who stood over him._

_The man grinned, "Never trust anyone Harry even those closest to you"_

**Change of view**

Ginny was jerked sharply out of sleep when she felt the thrashing of her husband and heard his low moan of agony. She felt a dart of fear, was he hurt? That agonized sound coming from him bespoke a type of pain that was physical and excruciating.

But no Harry's eyes were shut tight and he appeared to be still sleeping.

A nightmare.

A sense of dread came over her then, even though she knew it could be a nightmare completely unconnected to the ones that had plagued him before they married but she knew that was asking for too much.

Harry had begun to shiver and shake on the bed next to her and she reached out to clasp his head in her hands and gently tried to pat him awake.

"Harry, Harry! Wake up!"

He jerked his eyes flying open a wide eyed look of terror in them that only elevated her fear for him. He was panting as if he had just been running his skin clammy beneath her hands.

"Ginny?" he panted his hands suddenly clasping her to him as if he feared she would disappear. She held onto him smoothing the wrinkles of anxiety from his brow.

"It was just a dream Harry. You're here with me. You're safe." She soothed him pressing tiny kisses to his brow. She felt him shudder.

**Change of view**

He felt so cold her arms the only warmth in his entire body. He clung to her even as the visions of his nightmare clung to him. He could not stop trembling his body as frigid as if he had taken a dip in the Atlantic.

"Harry talk to me, was it about the battle with Vo-" She began…

"NO!" his sudden shout of protest startled her and he saw her she cringed a little. He shuddered again, as waves of memory hit him. Those memories had begun to fade into his past the moment he had decided to put them safely locked in the past and move with her toward the future. Now it seemed with this soul scaring nightmare his carefully constructed walls had crumbled around him.

"_Worry not Harry I shall indeed kill you as you plead. Not just yet though I have not begun yet to show you what true suffering is." Voldemort sneered as he leered at the ashen faced young boy who lay sprawled naked and shattered before him._

_Harry fought for breath his lungs constricting in pain his ribs having broken and splintered beneath the crushing weight of the boots of the men gathered. He felt as if splinters of wood had sunk into the soft tissue of his lungs, his breathing was haggard and sounded wheezing and broken. He felt hot sticky blood in his throat and found it hard to continuing pleading with his tormentor to end his torment._

"_Do you wonder how I knew where to find you Harry? Don't you wonder how I caught you unaware. Tut Tut Potter you trusted didn't you. Never trust anyone, I intend to teach you this lesson." Voldemort sneered and suddenly he was swooping down his wand tip pointing threateningly at the soft flesh of his belly._

_Harry's heart leapt into his throat and he whimpered unable to do more the pain in his ribs hampering further movement. _

"_Beg for me Potter. Promise me service, promise me your very soul beg me for my favor."_

_He felt a hot wave of hatred rise to the surface and new his defiance was clear in his eyes by the flame of anger they ignited in his tormentors eyes. With a slight swish of his wand the tip burst into golden flickering flame. Harry screamed as the tip scorched the soft skin of his belly._

_With malicious delight the dark lord began to etch burning words into the skin there and all Harry could do was scream…_

"HARRY!" The sound of Ginny's frantic cry tore him away from the nightmarish memory and Harry moaned with the effort of shaking off it's clinging presence. It had been so real, so damn real. He could smell the scent of burning flesh in his nostrils so strongly it threatened to gag him. He could taste the blood in his mouth its coppery tang disgusting and foreign to his tongue. His stomach burned as if someone had indeed touched it with a flaming torch Harry lay in his wife's arms gasping for breath for the first time in years frightened out of his mind.

Always before it had been just a memory, a paralyzing terrible memory but just a memory. An illusion brought forth by his tortured mind no longer willing to suppress and bottle such horrors. Now it was as if the natural barriers between illusion and reality were stripped away. He had felt the flames licking at his skin, felt the brokenness of ribs and blood clogging his throat of punctured lungs fighting for air and filling up with blood for their effort.

All over again he had felt it all over again.

And it had been very real, it had been no illusion.

_What about the dream before, what about what you saw was that reality or illusion?_

"Harry talk to me please" Ginny was pleading with him and Harry realized that he had not spoken to her since sinking back into memory.

His ribs twanged with pain even though he knew they were not shattered as they had been that day long ago, he still had to suck in a breath because of the sharp jab of pain. He could have kicked himself seeing the frantic look of worry in her eyes the trembling of her hands.

"I'm ok Ginny, it was just a nightmare. I'm ok" He reassured her pulling her into an embrace. As he held her the pain faded from his body gone as if it had never been there, but he knew it had.

She was shuddering against him holding tightly onto him. "it is not ok, you scared me out of my mind. Harry why can't you just tell me what's bothering you?"

He was so tempted to tell her all to reveal every terrifying detail of the night he'd defeated his worst enemy and gained a new one.

Himself.

His own body had turned against him that night it had become a trap of the mind that he couldn't seem to escape. It damaged him and anyone who got close to him.

_You are supposed to protect her, but all you ever bring her is pain. You should never have married her, she isn't safe with you._

He shut out the nagging voice of his conscience unwilling to give up the joy he had found with her. He held her tighter rocking her for comfort. "it's behind me, I just want it to stay in the past. To talk about it only brings it all to the present…" he began.

_Voldemort stood…_

Harry shuddered gritting his teeth forcibly drawing away from the black void of memory trying to claw it's way to reality. When no more memories surfaced he gave a sigh of relief.

"I'm scared for you Harry" he heard Ginny whisper softly.

"Don't be. The past can't hurt us." He reassured her.

He wouldn't let it, he reassured himself as he drifted back into troubled sleep.


	15. Chapter 15: What money can't buy

-1Draco Malfoy stared at the piece of parchment in his hands wanting nothing more then to tear it into thousands of tiny pieces.

_Dear Mr. Malfoy _

_It has come to our awareness that yesterday evening August the first at exactly midnight you Violated Act 33 in which all former members of the league of Death eaters are disallowed the use of any dark magic. You must come to Council chamber lower level 3A for a hearing to present your defense…_

As his hands shook with his rage he had to put the letter down or threaten crumpling it before he could read the rest. It wasn't the fact that he had been caught using what wizards deemed dark magic that had him wanting to strangle whomever had written this pompous note. It was the fact that for eleven years he had been clean. He had separated himself from the rest of Voldemort's former death eaters refusing to join in on their plans for domination and vengeance.

They were all fools, and Draco knew they would fail, Draco had learned the hard way not to throw in his lot with fools and that if he wanted something done he had to do it his way. Eleven years of simple living never stepping a toe out of line and still the ministry treated him little better then an ex convict.

It made him furious, not for himself he expected he deserved such treatment his part in Albus Dumbeldore's death was not a secrete and Draco was a hated person for it. Potter had made sure of that.

Just thinking about the other man made Draco's fists clench and the desire to hit something very strong. He hated Harry Potter! Everything came easy to Potter, Everybody loved him and he could break a million laws or rules and nobody treated him like a murderer. Potter had killed and he was a hero, Draco had merely helped to kill and he was treated as if he had murdered in cold blood.

_You might as well have, old boy. They will never see it any differently Potter could off a million people in a day and they'd clap him on the back for it. Besides what do you even care what the rest of the world thinks?_

And he didn't, Draco had struggled long and hard to separate himself from the stigma of being a former death eater. His youth had helped most people believed he had been at best trying to please sadistic parents and at worst young and misguided in his notions. Even those that thought this and pitied him, looked down on him and treated him with general distrust.

The Malfoy name had lost its splendor and its power.

Draco eyed his reflection in the mirror, he had never been a fan of poverty and the image of a tall flaxen haired man in his early thirties, stylishly dressed if a bit pale pleased him. He had learned to fight and to fight hard, to use whatever tactics however brutal and lethal to succeed in the world of business and to regain the fortune the Ministry had repossessed.

The Malfoy name was as a result to his efforts once again powerful and feared at least in the world of potions buyers and brewers. He liked it that way, he wanted nothing to do with the Ministry or their politics and even if he had wanted to they wouldn't let him within ten feet of their offices.

Draco snarled, on a roll of parchment somewhere in a file marked Draco Malfoy were two boldly scrawled words in red ink that would mar his life forever. Former D.E.

Because of this he was monitored like a criminal, because of this he was called into councils to account for any deed some whiney business competitor had a complaint about. If he had a gallon for every time he'd been called in on charges of cursing a competitor for a deal he'd be even richer. They were all fools and Draco would leave them to their stupidity it didn't even phase him.

Something dark swirled in his gut as the door to his study opened and he recognized the sound of his thirteen year old daughters clicking heels. She had taken to wearing them about a year ago and Draco smiled knowing he'd always be able to hear her before she came into a room.

When he turned to greet her the smile of welcome slid from his face seeing the tight lines around her pert mouth and the troubled look in her stormy gray eyes. He knew his daughter well and also knew that Shannelle was not as unfazed by public criticism as he was.

"Something wrong Shani?" He asked even though he already knew something was and already suspected what it was. He shoved the owl from the ministry under a stack of papers knowing if she saw it, it would probably upset her. Shanelle looked so much like him the same pale blonde hair and pointed nose. Her features were softer more feminine but resembled him enough that when they walked together it was obvious she was his daughter. She kept her blonde hair stylishly brushed and cut. He remembered her hair used to curl when she was little making her look like a warm cherub missing only the halo and a set of miniature wings.

The eyes were her mothers, that glacial grey that on her was warm and seeking but on her mother had been frigid and cold. Draco felt his stomach tighten and his lips drew into a thin line. Shani wasn't anything like her mother and never would be, not if he could help it.

"I got my Hogwarts supply letter today." Shani answered him looking as down trodden as he had ever seen her.

Draco didn't like her feeling like that, it wasn't bloody fair. Shani had done nothing wrong but she was always going to pay for his and her mothers mistakes. He tried to tease the frown of her face, when she smiled she always tore his heart out but he'd give anything just to see it again. "I never liked school work either Shani but it never made me miserable to get my letter."

Shani didn't smile didn't even address his comment. "Dad Neli told me you're going to Wales this week is that true?"

Their house elf Neli, Shani insisted in treating like a friend and equal was sadly one of her closest companions. The new house elf reform laws had given house elves more rights and Draco always found it a bit disconcerting to treat a servant like…well like a person. In his childhood house elves could be treated however he pleased and punished however he pleased. It was still a bit of a shock when ever Neli or one of the other house elves gave him sass.

Draco had to chuckle, as annoying as that display of disrespect could be sometimes he rather preferred it. Neli clucked over Shani like a mother hen making up for some of the lack of a mother in her laugh and no amount of Sass would ever make him fire or punish her. Not when she made Shani smile.

He would however like it if she let _him_ break news to his daughter. "Yes Shani Eckkers and Wellings potion shop isn't bringing in the revenue I had planned and I need to go an iron out some kinks. I'll only be gone for two months and you'll be in school for most of it." He confirmed hoping she would handle this gracefully and not be disappointed.

She crossed her arms and Draco noted his daughter was becoming a young woman right under his nose. The tapping of her heeled foot and the sophisticated glare was better then even his mother Narcissa could have done in her day. "What about my Birthday are you missing it again?" She demand.

Draco cringed this would be the second time in three years he had been called away during her birthday. He was becoming more like his own father everyday. He balled his fists beneath his desk denying this very truth with everything in him.

_Shani won't end up like me. Surrounded by mountains of gifts but missing the one thing that she really needs and knows she'll never get._

"of course I'll be here, I'll floo in if I have too but I will be here. I promised you I'd never miss another one remember." He reassured her.

The memory of the pale disheartened little girl who had stared up at him with tears spiking her lashes pushing away the gift he had brought him to atone for missing the one day he had promised never to miss; still clawed at him.

"It's ok Dad I know how important your business is to you." Shani excused him.

Draco felt fury boil in his stomach and it was directed at himself, she shouldn't need to excuse his neglect. "You're the only thing that's important to me Shani." He declared passionately. She was, it was for her he fought so hard instead of doing like many a former death eater had done and becoming a renegade. It was for her he pushed aside the memories of his wife and his son all taken from him.

By Harry Potter.

His fists clenched and he had to battle back a snarl of rage. He didn't want to frighten Shani with his anger.

"I know I am Dad but if I go with you, you won't have to worry about…"

"Shani you have school!" Draco reminded her already knowing where she was headed.

Shani crossed her arms again in frustration her nose wrinkling in dislike. "Dad who cares if I miss a month pay someone to…"

"Shani" He sighed putting his head in his hands feeling guilt that his daughter hated school so much because of him but knowing it was better for her to go.

Shani didn't think so she stood up in anger and put her foot down. She looked so much like him Draco felt a brief urge to chuckle. Shani was far from amused. "I don't want to Father! I'm never going back there! Last year when we were passing the old headmasters portrait Ellen Abbot pointed at me and called warned everybody that they should guard the headmaster from me. And when Professor Binns took points off because I fell asleep in class she warned him not to do that or I might get revenge and kill him. She said I came from a line of Professor killers. Not what I care what that fat cow has to say anyway but I'm bored with that school and I'm not going back there ever again. Pay someone off I don't care, get me a tutor but I won't step foot in that trash heap again!"

Draco grit his teeth feeling more pangs of guilt for the torment his daughter faced, all because of him. She put on a snobbish air as a form of armor but he knew their cruelty wore on her.

_Maybe you should take her out…._

_Hogwarts is the best school, they have no right to drive her away she did nothing wrong.._

_You did and know she's paying for it…_

"Shani I can't do that. Ellen Abbot is as much a busy body as her mother was back in my day pay no attention to…"

A cry of frustration interrupted him as Shani whirled around, Draco suspected to hide tears and marched for the doors. "Oh forget it, I knew you wouldn't understand. You spend all your time making money for us but what good is it! Go ahead and go and don't bother taking a day off for my birthday I wouldn't want to interrupt business!"

"Shani come back here, where do you think you're going?" He stood up shouting after her.

"Out and don't come with me." He saw her dash away a stream of tears with her hand and even though she muttered it her voice still carried. "If I'm alone sometimes people don't know I'm a Malfoy."

Draco had never been stabbed through the heart before but he could sympathize in that moment with those who had. As he slammed the door to his study and sank into his chair with a weary sigh he kicked himself over and over. Maybe he should take her out of school, was his pride worth her torment? Was anything worth admitting defeat, worth admitting that they were right and because of his actions in the past he should just slink away like a kicked dog?

What did he really fight for? His daughters rights or his pride?

There was a pop and Neli appeared at his side making Draco start in his chair.

"mistress Shani likes to sit on the bride in Governors Park. Master should go after her." The tiny house elf reprimanded him.

Draco sighed, "I'll only make it worse. Being alone will help her cool off besides I have work to…"

"If master spent half as much time seeing to mistress as he sees to work Master would not have this problem." Neli pointed out poking a boney finger at him.

He was never going to get used to a house elf having this much gull but perhaps Neli was right.

"Governors Park did you say?"

**Change of Scene.**

"Are you sure you're going to be ok alone Ginny" Harry asked her for what must have been the tenth time in the last five minutes. The baby could come any day now and that was cause for some watchfulness but the last two days Harry had bee almost obsessively watchful of her. Ginny couldn't figure out just what had him hovering around her acting like the worlds worst first time day when this was neither their first time going through this and a week ago he had been a calm and comforting presence in her life.

Now she just wanted him to leave. He was stiffening her with his worry and his odd behavior. She had yesterday sent an owl to Charlie asking him to bring some of Clarita's old maternity cloths but when Harry had found out he'd behaved like she'd invited Jack the ripper for tea.

"_No!…I mean why do you need hand-me-downs I'll buy you whatever you want, just tell me what you need and I'll go…um I'll have it delivered."_

Ginny shook her head confounded by his sudden anxiety over her and his sudden dislike of Charlie. She wasn't an idiot it was the mentioning of having Charlie over that had got his back up. She knew she shouldn't feel this way but she was more then a little relieved that Harry had planned to take the kids on an outing today with Ron and Hermione and couldn't back out of it.

She wouldn't let him, if she opened her eyes one more time to find him watching her with that fear in his gaze she'd start to cry.

Harry was helping Rory into his fall jacket it was only early august and still warm but he had just gotten over a cold and Ginny wanted to take precautions. Rory's black curls were jiggling to match the wiggling of his body as he chattered excitedly.

"And then can we get some Pumpkin pasties papa? PLEASE! Oh and a chocolate frog too If I get Victoria the Enchantress then I'll have a complete set. Frankie has loads of…"

Harry chuckled pulling his son to him in a tight hug, "If I gave you that much sugar I'd be in trouble with mum. You wouldn't want that now would you Rory?"

Rory earnestly shook his head then glanced at her with a grin. "You wouldn't be angry would you mummy,"

With Rory's green eyes beseeching her with his soft eyelashes and Harry's handsome gaze resting on her playfully what woman stood a chance.

"Oh I suppose an chocolate frog wouldn't hurt." She conceded gracefully.

When Riordan whooped for joy and clasped his thin coltish arms around Harry's legs nearly tripping him Ginny laughed finally some of her worry easing. She turned to him and asked, "Where's Hermione and Ron with the kids?"

"Well they were going to meet us here and we were going to go to pick up Frankie he and some mates of his were hanging out before the trip. I decided it would save time if they went and got Frankie and Rory and I met them in Governors park." Harry responded suddenly finding tying Rory's shoelaces by hand of supreme interest, a task needing so much concentration he couldn't even look up to meet her eyes.

"Harry it would have been easier for _you _to pick him up at the park and come back here. In fact you could have done it twice in the amount of time it would take them, it's out of their way." Ginny pointed out waiting for some clue as to why he had asked them to do it.

Harry just shrugged, "Not with floo powder the time really wouldn't matter then."

Ginny gave him a no nonsense glare, "Harry! You and I both know with a baby flooing themselves anywhere is out of the question that's why we wanted them to meet us _here _in the first place!"

Harry definitely didn't meet her eyes as he said, "gee guess I didn't figure that. Well they agreed and there's no harm be so why don't we just leave it be."

Ginny bit her lip but decided to let it go, like he'd said there wasn't any more then a little wasted time to complain about. "You're right." She agreed and noted the flash of relief in Harry's eyes.

"Can we go now papa?" Rory asked tugging on Harry's pant leg. The uneasy glint in Harry's eyes disappeared as he picked Rory up with a bounce and held him close.

"Sure we can just as soon as you give mummy her goodbye kiss you wouldn't want her feeling like her favorite guy didn't love her do you?" He teased.

Rory made a face even as Ginny laughed. He stuck his arms out and leaned in to give her a sloppy and slightly sticky kiss on the cheek. As far as kisses went Ginny had never received one that could rival Harry's but Rory's always came in a very close second. She gave his baby soft cheek a peck and smoothed his mess of curls even though she knew it wouldn't do any good.

"Behave yourself." She told him even though she already knew he would.

"Come with us mummy." Rory's arms no matter how resistant to kisses they had been a moment ago clung to her now.

Ginny gave him a squeeze, "Uncle Bill's coming over to escort mum to grandmas" she explained.

She saw Harry stiffen and frowned was he ok?

"He is? Why?" Harry asked, it was almost a snap.

"Because I didn't think you'd be happy if I walked there on my own and I cant floo or Aper…"

"You should have told me I can walk you there." Harry insisted interrupting her.

Ginny felt her patience with him running thin. Why was he being so fearful all of a sudden.

"Harry for goodness sake I'll be fine! If I start having the baby Bill will be there and Jane's with Mum already." she sighed.

"Bill doesn't need to…" Harry wisely stopped talking as her eyes narrowed and her hands went to her hips.

"So It's Bill that has you all worked up. Well whatever spat you two are in work it out on your own time. You and Rory are already late and it's foolish to refuse his help because of some spat the two of you are in." She reprimanded him.

When Harry cringed she felt a wash of relief, fights between the males in her family she could handle. Harry sighed giving in and turned to leave. Ginny full expected him to keep going so was a little surprised when he turned back and with his free hand pulled her to him.

It really wasn't fair. How was a woman supposed to be angry with a man when he could kiss her like that. Harry kissed her like she was both a deliciously and the water of life. He savored her and ravished her all at once and she had never been able to keep her head once he kissed her.

"Yuck Papa!" Rory's protest caused Harry to chuckle and draw away from her.

Ginny giggled at the look of blatant disgust on the little boys face. Her laughter faded as Harry's gaze caught hers. She felt heat churning inside her and knew her cheeks had gone red.

"I love you Ginny…be careful…please." His plea was so soft she thought she'd imagined it as He turned away and Rory waved goodbye to her.

Ginny shut the door after them shivering.

_He's frightened something will happen to you. _

_But why what could possibly…._

_He turned Charlie away, then Bill…._

Her eyes went wide as something dawned on her. He had sent Ron away, Harry hadn't wanted Ron in their home any more then he had wanted Charlie or Bill.

_But that doesn't make sense he isn't fighting with Ron he's going to see him right now…_

_He doesn't want them near you._

But why?

**Change of Scene**

She felt guilty, she shouldn't have said those things to her father she knew they weren't exactly fair. He couldn't help being a Malfoy anymore then she could. She knew a lot more about her father and his past then he thought she did. Shanelle made it a point to protect her father even when he didn't think he needed it. Father thought he was so tough, he thought he wore an armor of ice and that nothing touched him but Shani knew better.

She knew when words hurt him, when glances and stares cut deep. Mostly when he saw that they hurt her so she tried hard not to let it show when they did. She was a Slytherin, a Malfoy and fear and hurt were beneath her. Grandfather always told her so but she didn't really like Grandfather.

Lucius was the one person who could crack fathers armor and uncover just how angry and bitter he really was. Grandfather taunted Father until he was furious and Shani didn't really understand why, all she knew was that the two men hated each other. She often heard them arguing even when she wasn't supposed to about her father's behavior. Grandfather thought father was weak and spineless unwilling to crawl from the dirt Potter had kicked them into .

Father thought Grandfather was a bitter old man hiding from the ministry in a basement and had no right to call him pathetic.

Shannelle sighed tossing a pebble into the pond below her. This was her favorite sport in the Park the pond with it's still water and on clear days with the sun shining if you looked hard enough you could see the fish swimming amongst the water lilies. The ivory covered bridge was made of wood but painted pearly white and in summer it was easy to imagine she was anyone other then Shannelle Malfoy.

She sighed, because deep down she didn't want to be anyone other then her fathers daughter and her own weakness was making him unhappy. She grit her teeth, she was a Malfoy! Malfoy's did not cry or feel pity! A Malfoy pitied others.

It all came back to the Potters. That was one thing Father and Grandfather could agree on. That if it weren't for Harry none of this would have happened.

Malfoy's don't cry…she reminded herself throwing another stone into the water her fists balling.

They get even!

She was distracted from her vengeful thoughts by the sound of laughter and approaching voices. Shannelle watched as a group of boys came from the surrounding trees of the pond and approached the waters edge. They were each carrying planks of wood that had been sanded into flat smooth circles. Water Discs. A fairly simple but inventive wizard toy. The discs had been magically charmed so that when held over water they skimmed the surface.

It was kind of like skating on water, and was very popular amongst people her age. Shani had never been on one, it was hardly the kind of thing a young woman of good family would do.

It looked like fun.

There were three of them and as they got closer laughing and talking amongst themselves she began to recognize them.

Barty Lanchester, Rodger Denthon and Frankie Weasley, Gryffindor's golden Trio. Shani felt instant distaste as the three boys zipped around the edge of the pound leaning down to throw water at each other. They were all going to be third years this year and Shani was convinced it was a third year of having to stomach everyone's hero worship of someone whom Grandfather said deserved nothing better then dirt.

Shani's eyes narrowed hating the young man with thy flying red hair having the time of his life while she sat in misery. The Weasley's supported Potter, were in fact his closest friends and Shani hated them.

Especially Frankie.

If one more girl in her year gushed about how good looking he was, how funny his latest prank was she'd loose her breakfast. She fingered her wand itching to knock the boy off his disc, would he be laughing then?

_Frankie thinks he's got it all. He's a blood traitor and a supporter of…potter._

_You sound like Grandfather._

_Well maybe he's right!_

_No he's scary I don't think he's quiet sane and all the stuff he says about muggle borns is just not true!_

_Frankie's still a pompous know it all._

_Only because you think he's cute just like…_

_I DO NOT! He's a Weasley._

The very thought of thinking that…that…_Weasley _was even passably good-looking made her spitting mad. Before she could really think about what she was doing she'd picked up another stone, years of rock skipping had given her great aim.

It gave her great satisfaction to watch Frankie's arm jerk and watch his disc fly out from under him. She threw her hand over her mouth to keep from laughing aloud as Frankie stood up sputtering duck weed and other pond debris clinging to his red gold hair.

Shani grinned.

_Frankie didn't look so hot now!_

Shani was still grinning a moment later when Frankie hauled himself from the water and angrily marched towards the bridge.

_Oh stars he looks angry!_

_His hair is streaked with blonde I wonder if he has to magic it that way…_

_Pay attention he looks ready to kill you!_

"What was that for Malfoy? I wasn't bothering you!" Frankie demanded standing in front of her, arms crossed and dripping wet. He looked so thunderous, in his anger his blue eyes did something so incredibly…interesting that for a moment all Shani could do was blink at him.

_He's not completely normal._

_Neither are you, wake up he's still yelling at you!_

He was doing more then yelling he was advancing on her and his two cronies were not far behind him. Well a Malfoy just didn't back down and even if she hadn't been one she still wouldn't cower before the likes of Frankie Weasely. Never serious a moment of his life his entire world was perfect, he was spoon fed happiness and sheltered from the darkness of the world.

He didn't know anything about reality, or about pain and it made her sick.

_It's not fair, why does he get everything?_

_You're rich and he's poor you could have anything you wanted._

_Money doesn't buy everything it can't buy what I really want and that's a mother and a life where dad isn't working or frowning all the time and a Grandfather that was warm and caring like Frankies…. Money cant buy you a family that loves you, like Frankie has._

A wave of bitterness consumed her as she turned to face him down. "Actually you did Weasley, you were born weren't you." She snipped at him aware that her nose was turned up against him and that there in the sunlight she looked cool and polished. If she'd learned one thing from Grandfather it was that even if you were falling apart inside you had to present calm to the rest of the world. It was an effective tool, and it worked here because Frankie turned as red as his altogether irritating hair.

"Sod off Malfoy if you weren't a girl I'd make you take that back!" Frankie retorted obviously wanting nothing more then to throw a few punches like he would with another boy his age but alas since she was obviously a female he was denied the opportunity.

"How like a Weasley. Can't use words to battle, too much for your tiny brain to handle is it?" She taunted him feeling great satisfaction in watching the blue of his eyes change again churning with his aggravation.

"Just like a Malfoy to pick on someone to feel better about themselves." Frankie shot back.

She took great pride in knowing that her features remained cool even though that remark hit her hard. What did he know about it anyway?

"I don't pick on you to make myself feel good you just disgust me. Filthy little blood traitor! Is it true you're a half breed isn't your mum some sort of animal?"

As soon as she said it she regretted it, but it was too late to take it back and truthfully Shani had far too much pride to ever apologize to a Weasley.

"Don't talk about my mother Malfoy! Not when everyone knows your mother was murderer!"

A spear of pain in the center of her chest was all that she was aware of, she didn't think just launched herself on him pummeling him with her fists.

"You take that back Frankie Weasley you take that back! I HATE YOU, I HATE YOU!"

As she did her best to smash apart his body with her clenched fists she was only half aware that Frankie didn't hit her back even in self defense. He tried his best to shield his face after shoving her away proved futile. His two friends grabbed a hold of her but she kicked at them like a woman gone mad her tears clogging her eyes, carried away by her fury.

She didn't even hear the others approaching until much stronger hands then theirs were yanking her up and off of Frankie. Shani found herself blinking into emerald green eyes.

She sucked in a breath noticing the scar that would forever set this man apart. Harry Potter. The man who had hunted down her father after years of living quietly in whom just wanted a little peace and a chance to forget the errors of his youth. Harry had hunted him down like every other former death eater to be branded and monitored by the Ministry. To be dragged into a public hearing, to face humiliation and public scorn.

Then he had walked away continuing on with his life uncaring that he had ruined theirs. The scorn had killed her mother. She refused to believe the rumors that her mother had been twisted or born depraved. It was the constant scorn from her peers the public hatred that had driven her crazy. She blamed Harry for her mothers death and her fathers unhappiness.

**Change of view**

"DON'T TOUCH ME!"

Harry was more then mildly shocked to have the fey little girl erupt in his arms as if his touching her even for a moment would give her the plague. She looked to be about Frankies age and when she wasn't trying to claw your eyes out she was a darling looking little girl.

But since she was trying to scratch his eyes out of his head Harry thought it best to let her go and couldn't full appreciate that one day this girl would be a beauty and that she reminded him of someone. He knew who a moment later.

"Yes let go of my daughter Potter!"

That voice he might never hear for a hundred years but still recognize it. He had hoped never to hear it again but maybe that was too much to ask for. Behind him Ron and Hermione who had been seeing to Fankie stiffened and groaned.

Harry turned and noted Draco hadn't changed much. He was taller of course and he'd filled out a little, he was still tall thin pale and blonde. He supposed the man could be called good looking but that was by word of mouth only. Harry thought he'd never seen anyone uglier. It was a bad sign when you had to fight back a snarl at the mere sight of someone.

"You know Malfoy I didn't expect much from any child of yours but I at least expected some of that famous Malfoy reserve instead you've raised a heathen." He knew it probably wasn't fair but he couldn't resist jabbing. The last thing he felt like being was fair to Malfoy.

As far as Harry was concerned Malfoy may not have pulled the trigger that killed Albus but as his uncle used to say if you load the gun you're just as guilty. He had been proud to be a death eater even boasted about it. He'd proved himself a chicken but Snape had finished the job for him. The two had fled and not been seen again.

Upon becoming an Auror and getting his life back Harry had made it his mission to bring men like them to justice. Especially Draco, He thought that the day he dragged his former rival and forever enemy into the Ministry for trial he'd feel some closure with the whole thing. That the headmasters face would no longer haunt him and the pain would no longer linger.

It hadn't. In his mind he had brought the man to justice and he hadn't stayed to gloat. He hadn't done it out of personal vengeance if he could settle with his conscience when he found the man living quietly and peacefully with a wife infant son and young daughter he would have just left them.

An Auror couldn't pick and choose who he gave justice to, Malfoy was on the list of those to be brought in and Harry didn't owe the man anything. In fact all he owed Malfoy was, was a good beating for the pain he had caused him. He had been content to do his job and left it at that, hoping never to see the man again.

Too much to ask for.


	16. Chapter 16: Bitterness

"Why do I have to? Why couldn't you have just paid them for the stupid disc?" Shani shouted in frustration slamming the door to the parlor which smacked the arm Draco put up to halt it from closing in his face. He was trying hard not to spoil his daughter and not to do the things that his own father had done when raising him. He'd be damned if Shani depended on wealth and status becoming lazy as he had been as a teenager.

"Because you were the reason it broke so therefore you will pay for it." Draco rubbed his stinging arm trying not to glower at his daughters childish behavior.

"Problems in paradise Draco?"

He was startled to hear the cold sneer of his father coming from a plush arm chair near the window. If Draco had been a wanted man he paled in comparison to the ministries blood lust for Lucius Malfoy. If even a hint of his presence leaked out anywhere in Britain they had Aurors swarming the place. He was on the red list and destined for the kiss.

Potter had been in charge of that list and he had put Lucius at the top. Little wonder the man was reduced to hiding in the cellar of his sons home. Placing Draco and Shani in jeopardy if it was ever discovered he was hiding him. Which was why Draco had demanded when he agreed to hide the old man that he never leave the cellar and the enchantments Draco had placed there. Sitting there as calm as a cloudless day in front of the window was a risk to he and his daughter and Draco was furious.

"What are you doing up here Lucius?" He demanded.

Lucius gave him a mocking smile, the weathered lines around his mouth a testament to his years in hiding and the pallor of his skin was chalklike. Lucius ignored Draco's question and glanced at Shani.

"What has you so upset Shannelle?" He asked gesturing for her to come towards him. Draco stiffened but felt a twinge of relief when Shani shook her head. That relief vanished when she turned murderess eyes on him.

"Father's making me work for the Weasleys!" She seethed crossing her arms and sitting down in a pouting stance that for reasons no one could explain was both regal and childish all at once.

Lucius hissed drawing in a harsh breath that sounded almost snake like he turned cold eyes on his son. Draco's returning look was less then warm and definitely less then peaceful. "Save it Lucius, she broke somebody else's property so she'll work till she pays it off."

Shani gave a frustrated cry running a hand through her pale blonde hair, "I didn't even break it! When he fell off it spun out and smashed against some rocks on the bank! All I did was make him fall how was I supposed to know…"

"Shani!" Draco cut in loosing his patience with the argument. "you and I both know who's to blame for breaking his disc. I like the Weasley's little better then you but just because we don't like a person doesn't mean we have the right to hurt them."

Lucius smirked, "Interesting ideal Draco. I wonder when you acquired such foolish notions. Certainly not when you lived in my house."

Draco felt shame at the reminder that he really didn't have any right to talk, he after all had probably broken some records for cruelty towards a peer in his youth.

Lucius's laugh was mocking as he said, "I knew I should have separated you from your mother it was her foolish notions that made you so weak. You never learned it from me that's for sure."

Draco felt an instant and familer rush of both hatred and frustraiton following these words. He fought back the urge to yell and taunt back not wanting his daughter to witness the animosity between them. "As much as you mock mum, Lucius it's because of her I even allow you to hide here. If she hadn't of begged me to let you when she died I'd make you bloody well fend for yourself! You're bitter and resentful and I don't want you influencing my daughter."

Lucius had paled during his declaration and Draco recognized the hidden signs of malice and fury. "My influence? So you would rather place her in the hands of the Weasley's? To muck around in filth such as theirs, and lets not forget who married into their filth. You would have Potter as an influence to her?"

Their hatred of Harry was mutual though for different reasons. Lucius had been present the night of the Dark Lords death. Perhaps this accounted for his name being on the red list, which it was well known anyone on the red list was destined for the kiss with barely a trial. Assets were frozen and taken away homes searched and monitored friends and relatives questioned. Lucius had lost everything and it wasn't surprising that he would hate Potter as much as Draco did.

"That man is responsible for the death of my wife and my son do you think I like this any better then you do? If I start paying off all her debts and paying to smooth over her indiscretions it's going to teach her that she can do wrong without consequences. I won't have that even at the expense of having to see _Potter._" Harry's last name came out so bitter on his tongue he could taste it.

Lucius's lips curved in a snarl, "maybe it's better she hangs with Potter's lot for a while. Perhaps she'll get to see first hand what justice is like. True justice is vengeance."

Draco paled his own fists shaking with the anger he was trying to suppress and failing. "Shani wouldn't hurt the Weasley's or the Potters. If you think you can use her to hurt them I'll throw you out of this house before you can blink promises be damned!"

Lucius's smile was eerie and made a shiver go down his spine. "I merely meant she could watch true vengeance not take a part. Never fear Draco your precious daughter won't even have to get her hands bloody. She'd likely faint at the sight, she's _your_ daughter after all."

_The old man is crazy, nothing is going to happen to the Potters. Even if Lucius wants vengeance he couldn't very well extract it stuck in the cellar._

_Unless he leaves it…_

_That would be crazy, he knows all it will take is one person spotting someone who looks even vaguely like him and Aurors will swarm all over the town and any town in the radius. The first place they would look is here. He can't be that crazy!_

"You're despicable" Draco bit out through clenched teeth.

"And you're pathetic, hiding out here chained to your crimes but unlike me to weak to hold your head high and take back what's yours." Lucius sneered.

_Truth…_

_No not…_

_TRUTH_

Draco felt his fury fade to the type of shame his father was so good at making him feel. He turned away from the biter old man, it was too late for him but his daughter was going to have a chance!

"You're right, but she's still going because I want her to be better then both of us."

**Change of Scene**

"Well Harry life sure isn't boring with you around. Of all the things I thought I'd never see, a Malfoy digging in my garden was at the top of the list." Molly chuckled shaking her head in wonder as she watched the young girl with the pale blonde hair digging furiously at weeds, some that dared to snip back when her sheers got too close.

Shani did not look at all pleased to be forced to such labor and looked ready to attack a particularly stubborn and snippy weed with her bare hands. Harry who was sipping a cup of tea and reading the paper looked up and frowned slightly.

"I still can't fathom why he even offered to have her work it off. I would expect Malfoy of all people to have tossed Frankie a few gaelons and moved on." He wondered aloud. This had been on his mind along with other things for the entire week since the event in the park.

Molly glanced at him an odd look in her eyes, "you're a father Harry what would you have done if it had been Rory, would you have paid it off?"

Harry shook his head, "No he'd be in the garden digging but I happen to have a few morals Malfoy…."

"Is just as human as you are and therefore it stands to reason he might actually care what lessons he teaches his daughter Harry is that so hard to believe?" Molly interjected.

Harry snorted disdainfully "Of Malfoy? Why yes it is. A Malfoy wouldn't think twice about teaching their kid money can solve all their problems."

Molly sighed moving away from the window a fond look of frustration on her face. "Children don't always turn out like their parents as well you should know Harry. Sirius didn't, though you sure did that's for sure. James never could stomach the Malfoy's either and he was just as judgmental."

Harry felt a flash of shame beneath her motherly scold but harbored his ill like of the Malfoy family as a whole just the same.

_I have more then good reason to not trust any Malfoy as far as I can throw him. The day I find Lucius Malfoy…He can forget the kiss I'll bloody well kill him myself!_

Harry felt a slight tremor as memory and nightmare tried to push its way to the forefront of his mind.

"_Lucius here, he just wants to hear you scream"_

He was still oddly unable to separate himself from them even while he was awake. The effort of forcing them back made him tired, irritable and drained.

Ginny was noticing and Molly sure noticed, she cast him a concerned glance.

"Harry are you ill? You're all clammy. Why dear boy you're shaking!" She exclaimed hurrying around the table to feel his forehead.

"I'm fine mum, just getting over a slight bug that's all." Harry assured her. Fighting back a tremor as he was he didn't feel the usual pride and warmth in being able to call her that.

Molly's mouth tightened and she stepped back. " Harry James Potter I am not a fool and neither is my daughter. Don't think for an instance your behavior isn't upsetting her; or that we all don't notice your sudden distrust of her brothers. I happen to know about the argument as well and why you to can barely talk anymore without snipping at each other. It's not healthy in a marriage. You are most definitely not alright!"

Harry cringed, he had hoped his brothers- in-law would not notice that he no longer felt comfortable leaving them alone with Ginny. Ginny had sure noticed and when he'd gotten home after their outing a week ago and asked for them to move in with her parents during the last few weeks of her pregnancy Harry had immediately refused.

The Weasley brothers were constantly in and out of the Burrow which normally Harry loved and was actually a habit he and Ginny often practiced. He had shuddered at the thought remembering the dream that had been haunting him.

Perhaps it had been just a nightmare but too often his dreams in the past had signaled something that really happened. The image of Ginny dead and that unnamable red haired man leaning over her body sent fear spiraling through his whole system.

He wanted to trust each and everyone of them; but Harry had trusted before and been betrayed and if it meant his families life no precaution was too high.

Even still he was slightly ashamed to have let a nightmare scare him so badly and didn't want Ginny touched by his own minds sudden craven depravity and refusing to tell her just what had him so much on edge they had gotten into if not their first then definitely their worst row.

In the end not being able to stand the constant arguing and the separation between them as a result of his edict he had relented and they had moved in with her parents. He had hoped Ginny would leave it at that but she was still angry with his refusal and things had been stiff ever since then.

He was trying to protect her, to keep her untouched by his own stains and the harder he tried the more she seemed to resent his efforts.

A rush of bitterness threatened to overwhelm him and he felt his hands clench with the strength of the emotion. "Look if I say I'm fine then I'm bloody dandy! Maybe if she just believed me and let it be we'd get along a little better."

"Is she supposed to pretend to be blind Harry. To pretend that your unwillingness to share with her doesn't hurt. When you have a partner Harry you can't think about yourself she has to come first." Molly's eyes narrowed and her voice was firm, Harry knew she was getting angry and he really didn't want her famous temper pinned on him but he was getting too angry to care much himself.

"All I do is think of her! If I did what I wanted for myself I'd tell her everything, but I know what kind of pain that would cause her. Don't ask me to give her added pain when I can prevent it." He shot back.

"And you keeping things from her, keeping her from her brothers and not telling her why is not supposed to hurt her? Better she hurt for you then because of you!" Molly's reply was cryptic as her hands fisted on her waist.

Harry had to fight not to growl in frustration as he pushed away from his chair. Did Molly think he liked keeping things from Ginny? That feeling like he was loosing his sanity was a walk in the park? He had caused Ginny enough pain and he wasn't adding to it and that was final!

"Harry, you aren't thinking of me at all."

Both of them whirled around surprised to hear the sound of Ginny's voice. She was standing in the doorway Jane and Corry behind her both of them obviously having helped her down the stairs to investigate what all the sudden raised voices were about.

Harry flinched as her words registered.

_Not think of her? I can't even look my own best mate in the eye anymore fearing for her._

"You don't think of me Harry when you keep things locked inside of yourself. You obviously don't think about how that makes me feel or what that says about your trust in me." Ginny continued continuing to drive what felt like an ice pick into his heart.

"I was…" But she didn't let him explain.

She slapped away Jane's hand in frustration "Protecting me? Harry did it ever occur to you that I don't need protecting from anything but you?"

_Damn, I would have preferred an actual ice pick it probably would have hurt less._

Harry saw Jane flinch so it was a wonder he kept his own features cool and reserved unwilling to let the hurt of that statement show. " You know I would never willingly hurt you." He responded amazed that his voice didn't betray any of the emotion swirling inside of him.

Ginny seemed furious with his calm and willing to do or say anything to break it. "Oh wouldn't you? So you haven't willingly shut me away in a corner to worry about you? You haven't willingly denied me the comfort of my brothers without telling me why? News flash Harry that hurt! As much hurt as Voldemort has caused in our lives you've been the cause of far more, because you never stop thinking of yourself and what you need!."

"Now Ginny that just isn't fair! If there is a man who thinks less of his own life then Harry he's dead!" Corry defended him when Harry didn't defend himself. He was to busy trying to control the impulse to either scream, cry or do violence.

A moment later he felt like doing all three.

" But he does that for himself." She insisted to Corry then turning to face him again said "You never fought Voldemort so hard for all of us. I think you thought of us and in part it was for us but most of it Harry was for you. Voldemort killed _Your_ parents, his followers killed _your _godfather and _your_ mentor. He hurt _your_ friends, and frankly Harry he hurt _you. _You killed him for yourself not for anyone else. You hunt the rest of his followers because you hate them, you hate them not for the death of your parents or anyone else but because they hurt _you_. And you keep it locked inside because…"

He couldn't take it anymore. That she would think so poorly of him was killing him. The tiny voice in the back of his mind that told him her words had the wring of truth was causing him to panic. He wasn't hateful and vengeful was he? It was one thing to kill to protect, another out of vengeance. That put him over the line into the same category as his enemies.

Harry had always walked a thin line and sometimes he had forgotten where it was and stumbled over it. Had he lost sight of it so completely? Had he never known where it was, jut convinced himself he was doing the honorable thing when really all he had wanted was to kill the man who had hurt him?

_Is that so wrong? Voldemort needed killing nobody argues that._

_Does Lucius? Do any of the others….?_

Just thinking of calling off the hunt for Lucius or any of the other men who had been there the night he'd lost himself sent blinding red rage through him. He knew it showed on his face, he knew he probably looked frightening in his anger but he couldn't help it.

_Not a bloody chance in hell! The day I let that bastard walk away from me is the day I die._

"…BECAUSE I KNOW THAT! And damn it Ginny if you knew the half of the way I felt you'd…" He stopped suddenly unable to breathe past the pain of the truth.

_If she knew the depth of the way you can hate she'd leave you._

_Then let go of it, it's tainting your entire life…_

_NO!_

"look, it's more then clear what you think of me and more then clear you don't appreciate my trying to take care of you. So I…"

He faltered again not saying what his hurt and bitterness demanded he say.

_What wont? And what if your dreams weren't just dreams and come true. What if one of them hurts her just because you're off in a snit?_

_I'd die._

"…I need to take a walk" he sighed suddenly weary beyond belief. He didn't even look at her as he pushed past her and headed for the door. He nearly tripped over Riordan standing outside the door his eyes wide and looking a little too bright, as if he was frightened.

_More then likely he is, the both of you screaming at each other of course that would frighten a child._

The added shame the fear in his son's eyes heaped on him was not what he needed!

"Papa?" Rory's voice was small and questioning.

Unwilling to meet his gaze to face the guilt in the mirror of his eyes Harry moved past him without saying a word.

**Change of view**

_Why did you say those things? What on earth were you trying to do drive him away!_

_Part of it's true, I can see it in his eyes. His hate of them is what's feeding his nightmares keeping them alive, he's going to hurt himself with it._

_Well you chose a bloody stupid way to get to him! Call him a selfish killer, that's sure to get him to open up._

Ginny felt her whole body trembling as she fought back the tears welling in her eyes. She felt Janes hands steadying her again leading her towards a chair.

"Well what were you trying to gain there, I didn't catch your point" Jane spoke quietly.

Ginny was not in the mood to have anyone tell her how stupid she had just been. "Oh shove it Jane!" She snapped irritably.

"No I will not! That man has sacrificed more for all of us, for _You_ then anyone else. If you think for one moment he doesn't love you above all things I'll end your sorry life right now. Stupidity like that shouldn't exist." Jane snapped right back.

"Enough, Jane's right Ginny. Hurting him was no way to reach him it was foolish of both of you. All you did was hurt each other and hurt your little boy, you're due any day now Ginny stress could cause you to go into labor!" Molly admonished smoothing the hair back from her brow.

Ginny sniffled hating her rioting emotions, "I know alright. I know he loves me I'm not too stupid to exist." her smile for Jane was wobbly but still there. "I'd have to be blind and deaf not to see and hear how much he loves me. I just don't understand how a man who can love like him can have so much hate and anger beneath the surface."

"If he can love deeply then he can hate just as deeply, he was hurt we can all figure that and he's allowed that hurt to make him hate to the point of it being destructive. Harry either loves you or hates you, he hates his aunt and uncle he hates Draco, he hated Voldemort. I don't think Harry ever really learned how to forgive." Jane almost seemed to be speaking aloud.

Corry snorted, "Don't be ridicules, he forgave them for beating him up. This isn't the first time he's fought with Ginny but they've always forgiven each other. He forgave Ron for his jealousy and Albus for keeping things from him. Harry knows how to forgive."

Jane shook her head. "Oh that's easy, those are all people he already loves. It's easy to forgive when you love the person."

Corry raised an eyebrow, "And your point would be?"

Jane rolled her eyes, "real forgiveness you can't pick and choose who you give it too. His need for vengeance is brutal and wars with his peace of mind. It's already eating away at him, his marriage his very sanity. I don't think Harry really fears his nightmares, I think it's what he discovers about himself that he fears. To truly be free of his past Harry has to let go of the need for vengeance."

Corry's eyes widened as an dark wizard hunter this didn't sit right with her. "If you expect Harry to let those people go unpunished you're thicker then a brick wall Jane."

"Did I say let go of the need for Justice? I believe I said Vengeance, Did anyone hear me say Justice?…No? That's what I thought" Jane smiled knowingly while Corry flushed.

"Oh shove it Jane" Corry mumbled.

**Change of Scene**

Shannelle had been drawn to the window as soon as all of the shouting had started. She hadn't really meant to eavesdrop but really even if she had staid where she was she could have heard them loud and clear. She knew she should feel some satisfaction that Potter's life wasn't as rosy as it appeared. At the very least his obvious pain should bring her some sort of delight.

Was this what Grandfather had meant by her watching Justice.

If this was Justice it left a bitter taste in her mouth and it left her feeling cold and angry. How many times when her mother had been alive had she stood outside their door and listened to them argue just like this. Their word full of anger and resentment. Her mother tearing apart her fathers character.

"_I never should have married you…I could have been living in a manor somewhere but we live in this hovel people watching us like criminals…All your fault…just like your father…evil in your blood."_

Shani shivered as the remembered words floated in her mind like a ghostly specter. She had been no older then five then and such bitterness had frightened her. She had always crawled into Jacob's cradle whenever they fought and cuddled him covering his ears so their shouting would not disturb him.

She felt a pang of loss and shoved memories of the brother she had lost away. They weren't all bad memories, she had memories of when Mum and Dad had been happy together when they would tuck her in at night together. When they could walk down the street with bright smiles on their faces Jacob smiling and gurgling his baby talk and she would skip for them and they would clap like she'd done something wonderful.

Until Potter had shown up, until he had dragged her father into trial and he had been shamed and cursed by the public his assets frozen. He'd lost his job, and the friends he had made there. Mother had lost everything that had been important to her. The bitterness had changed her, fathers unwillingness to even go after Potter and make him take it all back had driven between them. Grandfather called it weakness and mum had too. They had argued and argued constantly after that.

Until mother started drinking and the mother that she remembered the smiling woman with the glittering clothes and sparkling parties disappeared becoming a sunken and wasted shell. No more soft touches, gentle became rough and when father had seen the bruises he had taken Shani with him to work keeping her away from mother.

She didn't like what Mother was doing to her and herself but Shani had still loved her, still hoped that she'd get better. She knew mum hadn't meant any of it that she loved her, father and Jacob and wouldn't mind being poor and would just ignore being hated.

She knew Mother hadn't meant to poison herself and Jacob, it had been an accident. Mum and father were both good at and loved potions but people could make mistakes. She had not killed herself as everyone said and murdered her infant son.

_You know she did, mum never made mistakes in potions she and dad were both brilliant at them…_

_Nobody would let bitterness go that far, especially not her she used to be so bright and happy.._

_But she wasn't anymore, people hated her for marrying dad. They called him a monster, all her friends turned on her she lost all her money, she lost everything. Because of Potter._

Perhaps this was Justice. It had to be the same thing that had happened to the Malfoy's was happening to him. Did he even realize it. How could he? In his thirst to punish them he hadn't even stopped to look at who he was punishing.

And still she could find no satisfaction in watching him fall. She hated it.

Especially when the little boy slipped out the back door tears leaking out of his eyes his fist in his mouth looking as if he meant to physically stop himself from crying.

He didn't have a scar like Potter but with his messy hair and eyes it didn't take a genius to know who's son he was. She should hate him too but she couldn't.

She had been in his place too many times.

Potter's wife was pregnant Shani had seen her before. Would things get worse between he and his wife? Would she become bitter and angry and turn to alcohol. Would Potter come home one day with his son's hand in his own to find her and the new baby….

_STOP IT!_

_I'ts no more then he deserves, he did it to your family!_

_Nobody deserves that!_

So Shani did something she knew if either her Grandfather or her Father saw they would be equally angry for. She walked up to the little boy the tiny image of the man they all hated and sat down next to him.

"Hey you aren't crying because the adults are yelling are you?" she asked offering him her sleeve. It was expensive silk her shirt but since it was already covered in dirt a fact that infuriated her moments before she figured tears wouldn't do it much more damage.

Even as he wiped his face against her arm sniffling the little boy was shaking his head. "No, Papa never cry's and I don't either."

_You could have fooled me._

The little boys stubborn pride amused her reminding her of herself a little. Maybe that's why she scowled at the thought of the little boy wanting to be like his father so much. The world didn't need two of them.

"how about just being you. You're allowed to cry when your hurt aren't you?" She asked.

The little boys eyes searched hers and she was stricken by their color and the depth of emotion that seemed to be displayed for all to see there. That kind of openness was both endearing and frightening, he was going to get hurt if he stayed so open. You needed to be closed so others couldn't hurt you, Shani had learned this the hard way.

Most everyone she knew except Neli, had the same closed and guarded look. To meet someone without it was both disconcerting and heartening all at once. She didn't want to be the one to put the shield in front of those guileless green eyes.

"I think so, mum says it's ok to cry sometimes." He answered her question almost like a question of his own.

She nodded, "And your mum seems like a smart lady. "

_Except for her choice in husbands maybe._

She thought to herself but this was hardly the thing to say to him.

" So go ahead and cry when you need to. But I don't think you should cry over silly adults yelling. If adults didn't yell at each other every now and then I think they'd explode."

When he gave a startled laugh she felt relief and a spurt of triumph at having gotten him to laugh. "you think I'm kidding? Could you imagine trying never to yell at someone for the rest of your life wouldn't you feel like just popping? You wouldn't want your papa to pop would you?"

He was a cute little cretin when he giggled those green eyes of his dancing with delight. He shook his head his curls bouncing and Shani felt like sighing. If he weren't a Potter she'd think he was adorable.

"Nope, sometimes Edward makes me so mad I feel like going pop." He told her a conspirator's grin on his face.

"Who's Edward?" She asked.

"he's my cousin. He's uncle Percy's and he's such a stick in the mud he makes me mad! I wish a troll would eat him."

The little boy looked so serious she nearly chocked on her laughter. It was just then that the back door opened and the Weasley woman everyone called Molly stood there a pitcher of pumpkin juice in her hand and a smile on her face.

"There you are Rory, you aren't bothering miss Malfoy are you? Here dear I brought you some refreshment you're doing a nice job out here you know. I've never seen this garden looking so weed free."

The woman's smile was so warm Shani found it hard not to smile back. She should have stuck her nose up at the juice but she suddenly remembered just how thirsty she was. She settled for a cool look of disdain as she took the mug offered her and as thirsty as she was she sipped it daintily.

Instead of being offended the woman actually smiled and winked at her. "My my my, you are a Malfoy aren't you."

Shani blinked at her, she had never heard anyone say that without making it an insult.

She grinned and with pride lifted her chin and with as much polish as she could muster she said, " And I hope no one forgets it."

The Weasley woman laughed.

She still hated the entire lot of them but the Weasley woman wasn't as bad as the rest. And the kid, Rory? He was ok.

For a Potter.

**Change of Scene**

It was late evening and Harry had still not come home. Her parent's were out and Jane and Corry had left long ago. Jane out with Seamus and Corry to greet her husband when he came home.

Where was he? They had fought before what married couple didn't but he always came home flowers in tow and they always made up. Ginny was worried about him and it was while she thought of him that she felt the first tightening sensation low and deep in her gut.

Fear assailed her, she recognized this type of pain having birthed a child before. She had moved into her parents home always so full of people to be sure someone would be around when this happened if Harry wasn't.

Here she was alone.

_Oh for heaven's sakes!_

Ginny rolled to the edge of her bed and put her feet on the floor.

_You can do this, you can do this go to the desk and send an owl and wait for someone to get here. These things take hours they…._

The first contraction hit and all thought was driven from her mind. She could do nothing but ride it out not even having pain dulling potions to make the pain a minor irritant instead of all consuming as this pain seemed.

When it finally passed she lay gasping tears in the corner of her eyes scared out of her mind wanting nothing more then for her husband to walk through the door.

She couldn't believe how selfish and stupid she had been saying the things she had. Harry was always taking care of her, coming to her rescue. Shed give anything for him to come now.

_Fine time for you to figure that out now you already drove him away._

_Harry never stays away for long he…._

The tightening was back and she stopped thinking to brace herself. As the second contraction rolled over her she heard herself cry his name like a plea.

When she heard the sound of the front door opening and closing she felt her heart leap in her chest praying that it would be him.

_Please…please…Harry just come back._

"Mum? Dad? You home? I need to talk to you."

She heard Fred's voice and as ridiculous as it was she felt a flash of desperate disappointment.

_What's the matter with you, help is help!_

"FRED! HELP"

**Change of Scene**

Lucius stirred the waters of the seeing pool he had created and smiled watching the Weasley chit go into labor. It had taken no end to planning and stretching strings, and bullying to make sure every member of the Weasley family was not present in this moment except the one he wanted. The one he had a measure of control over. Just as he had control over Harry.

A frightening thin not being able to tell between illusion and reality.

He stuck his wand into the pool and the water ran red.


	17. Chapter 17: Joy

Fred had looked like hell even before he entered the room his sister shared with Harry. For the past month his stomach seemed to rebel against food and his sleep patterns were almost reduced to nothing. His skin was pale and clammy their were deep purple circles around his eyes and his hands shook constantly either from exhaustion or pent up energy he couldn't tell.

He was frightening his family he knew that, he was frightening himself. He thought he was going crazy, he had to be. He was seeing things that weren't there, yesterday he had an hours long conversation with his wife. She had been there, he had seen her been able to touch and smell her as she walked into the store room behind the shop.

Then he had felt a hard slap blinked to see his twin standing in front of him his eyes frantic with worry and Angelina no where in sight. He hadn't fallen asleep George said one minute he had been working the next he was looking up towards the door and greeting his wife, except he wasn't actually talking to someone.

It was getting worse, he was getting worse. He refused to sleep his dreams while he was actually asleep were even more frightening. If he had looked bad off before he was even worse a moment later when he walked into the room and saw Ginny standing there clutching her belly.

_Damn it, why me._

"Fred! Oh thank God. Quick send an owl for Harry. Then Jane I'm definitely not making it to St. Mungo's." Ginny panted a look of painful relief washing over her features.

"Right I'll…"

And suddenly red was flashing before his eyes. He rapidly blinked trying to dispel the red and as it faded he gaped in horror as slowly in front of him Ginny began to transfigure.

Where his sister had been before now sat crouched in wait was some sort of beast he had never seen outside of a zoo before. It's bangles were stark against the orange of it's coat it's eyes cold and hungry. His knees trembled as he stared his own death in the face.

The red was back this time brighter it's light harsher as it seemed to spear his brain and suddenly Fred could see the thing leaping for him.

As panic overwhelmed him Fred had only one thought. He didn't want to die, whatever Ginny was playing at if it was kill or be killed he'd rather kill.

**Change of scene**

_Just go back and apologize!_

_No!_

_You were wrong to yell at her,_

_She was wrong too_

_You both where! Is it worth your marriage to split over petty words._

Harry sighed looking into the amber liquid that filled his glass. He had been unable to drink much of it his thoughts taken as usual by his wife. As angry and hurt as he was he really wouldn't want it any other way.

He was at the Pot of Gold the only place he would think to go and get a drink knowing that Seamus would fleece him if he didn't. In truth Seamus was good company and over the years this had become the gathering place for the men in his family.

He supposed that was the real reason he had come, seeking company that is but Jaime Seamus's assistant was behind the counter tonight and he belated remembered Seamus had plans with Jane.

Harry sighed.

_It's obvious you hate fighting with her just go back._

_I'm not ready._

_She's pregnant could have the baby any day and your excuse is your not ready? Maybe your as selfish as she says._

_There's always one or two Weasley's at the burrow._

_You're her husband YOU should be there._

He was so engrossed with beating himself over the head with arguments that he didn't hear Devon approach until his friend and partner had a hand clamped on his shoulder and was jerking him around. Harry almost bit his tongue in surprise.

"Not drinking yourself to death are you Potter?" Devon asked an eyebrow raised at his mug of ale.

Corry was on Devon's arm and she like Devon looked a little worried.

Harry sighed glad to see someone he could talk to. He shook his head and said, " No I can't even finish this one. I'm doing more thinking then drinking."

Devon's lips twitched as if he would smile, "Always good to hear why do you look so glum about it?"

"Because I'd rather be drunk then miserable." He sighed pushing the drink away even as he said it.

Corry shook her head, "No you wouldn't you'd rather be with your wife but you're sulking. Ginny feels just as bad as you do, the both of you are sitting apart sulking when you could be together."

Was he that easy to read? Was he really sulking?

_Yes, you aren't a kid. Be an adult and tell her your sorry and Try not to hurt her anymore it's the only productive thing you can do._

Harry glanced at the both of them he knew they were right but he just didn't want to face her when she could think he was a cold bloodied killer.

Devon rolled his eyes, "Look if not for yourself then for her Harry. It's not safe for her to be alone when she's due like she is."

"She's at her parents their home…" Harry began but Corry was shaking her head.

"No Your mum and Father-in-law took Rory out for the evening." She pointed out.

Harry frowned, "Well one of the others are bound to…"

The realization struck him in that instant. Ginny was alone and it was true one of her brothers was bound to stop by at some point.

His dream came back in full force sending fear straight to his heart.

_You're an idiot! You left her alone to sulk and if something happens to her…_

Harry was out of his chair and out the door so fast Devon and Corry were left blinking after him in shock.

"What the hell…" Devon muttered.

"Should we go after him?" Corry asked.

Devon hesitated for only a split second, this was his evening with his wife after all.

"Yes something's in the wind and it doesn't smell nice send out the Alert to the rest of his family."

**Change of scene.**

Fred looked absolutely terror stricken, it would have been funny if he wasn't suddenly chalk white and trembling like pregnancy was contagious! She needed him strong and alert, he looked near to fainting. Narrowing her eyes she noted that indeed Fred looked beyond fainting he looked ghastly ill.

_Just your luck your rescuer has the flue._

She took deep shuddering breaths trying to ride out the waves of pain. She for his sake tried to appear calm and collected. "Fred Darling those owls, if you could do that right now that would be great. I'm going to lay down, while I do that I need you to go into Mums room and on the shelf get her potions books. Can you do that love?"

She had just turned slightly away when she heard him shout his voice was high and thin a threat in them. "GET AWAY FROM ME! STOP GINNY STOP!"

She turned back around as fast as she could while suffering labor pains her heart thudding in her chest. Fred's eyes were glassy and he looked…rabid. He really was ill! Now he was thrashing and stumbling toward her and Ginny felt fear again but this time it wasn't for the baby or bearing it alone.

It was for herself.

"Fred Stop! Fred!"

Too late he was grabbing her shoulders in a hard punishing grip, reaching inside his cloak for his wand. Ginny blanched beginning to tremble when he drew out the knife.

**Change of view.**

Harry appeared with a bang just behind Ginny his heart pounding so hard and fast in his chest he was afraid when he aperiated it would leap out of his chest and not be able to follow. It did but it lurched painfully when he processed what was going on in front of him.

He didn't have time to think about what he was doing. He was grabbing Ginny by the waist and shoving her behind him.

**Change of scene**

_Dear Mr. Malfoy,_

_This is the second and last warning you will receive. The ministry has detected the use of Dark magic from your residence as of the present…_

Draco frowned at the letter the tawny ministry owl had just received. He supposed he had deserved the last warning he had been using dark magic at midnight but only in a moment of weakness to dispel himself of nightmares. He had felt ashamed of it, after all if the ministry decided he was on a sort of Death Eater rebound Shani could be taken from him and into Azkaban he would go.

But this letter, he was filing papers hardly a dangerous form of magic! He crumpled it and tossed it away anger beginning to rise. Was the ministry looking for reasons to throw him in Azkaban. He snarled, he wouldn't throw it past Potter afterall who would the public believe it's hero or him!

And yet…there was one other person in the house.

_He wouldn't!_

_Would he?_

**Change of view.**

It had happened so fast Ginny didn't even know Harry was there until she was jerked roughly behind him. The pain that movement caused her, made stars zing across her eyes and she moaned low in her throat and she feel hard to her knees which only made the pain worse.

When she could finally see straight she blinked past the tears of pain and nearly swallowed her tongue. Fred and Harry were locked against each other Harry gripping the arm Fred used to wield the long jagged knife, Fred with his free hand gripping Harry's wand arm.

_Why was he doing this? He had tried to kill her and now he could kill Harry…_

_Harry's the stronger fighter more then likely he'll kill Fred…_

Revulsion and desperation swirled in her gut as another contraction, this one sharp and punishing of all her sudden and harsh movement. Ginny bit her lip against the pain and felt blood in her mouth.

_If Harry killed Fred…I couldn't forgive him…Fred's trying to kill him…That isn't FRED…Harry would never forgive himself…_

Thoughts swirled in her mind unconnected and blurred by pain.

**Change of scene**

Lucius had to fight not to let out a jubilant cry of the triumph he was feeling as he stirred the water's of the seeing pool and chanted the words that would drive the Weasley boy into higher frenzy forcing Potter to end his miserable life if he wanted to save his own and his wife's for that matter.

"Your new fond little family wont think so highly of you then will they potter. Will your wife ever look at you the same again? Just as mine looked at me." he snarled his eyes gleaming the taste of vengeance so incredibly sweet on his tongue he could taste it like the finniest of wines.

"The water turned an even darker red and the sound of Harry's cry of pain filled the cellar like a chorus of angels and Lucius's smile widened. Fred had got him with the knife, not enough to kill he didn't want Potter to die just yet. It was enough to force Harry to action.

"Go on Potter do it! Kill…you've done it so many times before don't hesitate now." He chortled enjoying being in control of Potters life in this moment.

The sound of the cellar door opening dimmed his joy, in fact he felt such instant joy he had to battle against the urge to kill his son.

_The blood traitor has interfered for the last time kill him, he is no child of yours likely his mother was unfaithful. That lousy excuse for a man can not be from you!_

_We need him, it is too dangerous to be on the streets for extended amounts of time he is your shield._

_He won't shield you when he knows._

_Oh yes he will I will make sure of that!_

Still he was enraged, to deal with Draco just now he would have to relent and give up his plans for the time being. That meant the Weasley boy would live another day.

He growled swirling his wand counter clockwise and watching the water clear.

_Draco will pay for this, when I no longer need him he will pay dearly._

**Change of Scene**

_Why aren't you fighting to kill him? You could have killed him in seconds you've fought men twice as strong as he._

_It's Fred! I can't just_

_He's going to kill you if you only fight to defend yourself he's gone absolutely mad!_

_I can't_

The feel of that knife biting into his shoulder made Harry cry out in pain.

_Damn it if he kills you who's going to protect Ginny, you can't think about being his brother right now!_

Harry jerked back fighting to make a decision. Even as his soul screamed a denial and his hands trembled he knew what he had to do. Kill or be killed.

Now that he wasn't trying not to hurt Fred disarming him was easy the knife flying from his hand arching in the air. His wand had been jerked from his hand and kicked under the bed long before as a result to his half effort at fighting so the knife was the only weapon.

_Grab it out of the air and end it!_

Harry shuddered even as he thought this, the very thought of stabbing Fred making him ill. His moment of hesitation gave Fred an opening he didn't need a knife to kill Harry. He tackled him both of them falling to the floor as Fred literally tore at him with his bare hands using anything to harm him.

Fred's teeth actually sank into the soft skin where his shoulder and neck connected.

_He is literally going to eat you alive! KILL HIM!_

Harry used his knees to push up hard against Fred's chest sending him flying off of him. He heard Fred's head hit a rung on the bed with a twang and a dull thud, Harry expected him to sink to the floor but it was as if he was daemon possessed.

There was a stream of blood leaking from the back of his head now and his eyes were rolling back but he kept coming. Harry labored for breath ignoring the pain in his shoulder and the blood draining from his body revulsion at what he was about to do threatening to choke him.

_He's your brother…he's your friend…_

_He's going to kill you, then he'll kill Ginny._

Ginny groaned and both their eyes were drawn to where she lay pale and sweating on the floor her eyes glassed over with pain. Fred's lip curled and he turned towards her.

That decided it for Harry. He dove for the knife grabbed it and came up on a roll. He wouldn't think about it.

_Don't think about it. Just do it._

_That isn't Fred. Your Friend and your brother._

_It's a crazed lunatic who is going to kill your wife his own sister if you don't stop him._

And just as Harry reached him Fred shuddered and turned.

The look in his eyes was so startled and full of terror Harry just knew that whatever madness had over taken him it was gone now and he was watching the knife descend.

He looked oddly accepting of the whole thing as if he wanted it to happen. He didn't even move out of the way.

Harry knew it could be a trick, that if he allowed his emotions to fool him he could be costing Ginny her life but he just couldn't do it.

Once you threw yourself on someone it was hard to stop the momentum nearly impossible, Harry did the only thing he could he dropped the knife and went crashing into Fred.

They feel to the floor and Harry's arm wrenched, black threatened to engulf him as the pain rushed through his arm so painful he felt it in his very teeth. Fred didn't attack him he lay beneath him groaning and that's how the others found him when they rushed in.

"What the Hell is going on in here…"

"Oh my God there's blood…."

"Mummy, Papa!"

"Clarita take Rory to his room, Seamus get me my potions bag Ginny's having this baby now and Harry looks like he's about ready to bleed to death. Questions can come later."

The voices were unrecognizable as they swirled in the dimming painful haze of his mind but their words struck a cord in him.

_Ginny, she's having the baby and she needs you._

Harry with a slight hiss of pain raised himself to sitting blinking away the spots in front of his eyes.

"Easy Harry easy just sit still and…"

He shook off Devon's hand his focus on the woman they had lifted into the bed. His heart his very life lay on that bed and he was NOT going to sit and take it easy.

He climbed to his feet and would have fallen as the wave of dizziness overtook him if Devon and Seamus hadn't both grabbed him and steadied him.

"Ginny will be alright mate, Jane's called for a medi-field team and she's working on Ginny as we speak. Just calm down." Seamus soothed him trying to keep Harry from hurting himself in his effort to get to her.

"Ginny…" He began to protest.

"needs you to be around when she wakes up to help raise your children. Which you won't be if you bleed to death Harry sit still while we get you help." Devon scolded him forcing him to sit.

Harry would have continued to protest if nausea had overtaken him and the edges of his world hadn't gone absolutely black.

**Change of Scene**

"Get Out! Right now!" Draco roared pointing towards the cellar stairs. His fury felt so great he was surprised the house didn't come down around them.

_HOW DARE HE!_

He had caught Lucius in the bloody act, doing illegal magic in their cellar. He could have brought the ministry down on their very heads! Draco paled thinking about what that could have meant for them. There was no way in hell the ministry would believe he had nothing to do with his plans especially when he was hiding the man in his cellar. He and Lucius would have been carted off to Azkaban and Shani would have been taken from him. Who knew where she would end up and with whom.

The thought of going to prison made him fear of course but is was nothing compared to the fear of loosing his daughter. Being unable to protect her, perhaps never seeing her again.

" calm yourself Draco I…"

Draco flew at him wanting to strangle the man. "I said Leave you bastard or I'll turn you in myself!"

Lucius even laying sprawled on the floor his cheek stinging from the hit his own son had just delivered him looked coolly reserved as if he knew he wasn't leaving and saw no reason to get upset.

"I thought you would feel some sort of justification in watching Potter loose everything. You don't even have to get your hands dirty, we both know how spineless you are when it actually comes to taking action. " Lucius sneered.

Draco felt both fury and shame, then more shame for allowing his father to make him feel guilty for not measuring up to his expectations. Lord knew he thought Potter deserved a few hits for all the pain he had caused him but he hadn't believed then when his wife urged him to strike back and he didn't believe now that Potter deserved to die.

He was content to hate the man and stay out of his way, if Potter was content to do the same then they would get along just fine. He didn't need to die or suffer the way Draco had, nobody did.

"Get up and for the last time get out. I've let you ruin my life, I won't let you ruin Shani's." He bit out through clenched teeth.

"Fine I'm going Draco but that won't stop my plans for vengeance. And out in the open like I will be I'll be caught." Lucius reminded him.

Draco could have laughed, if Lucius thought he gave a damn if he ended up on a date with a few dementors he could think again. A moment later he felt far from laughing.

"And before I get the kiss I'll be sure to tell them where I've been hiding. That's an offense you can't deny or pay your way out of. At best they might believe you when you tell them you had no part in my little plan. Even still you'll get Azkaban and you'll loose your precious little daughter. She'll go to her closest living relatives, perhaps it will be a blessing surely Bellatrix can strip her of all the weakness you've instilled in her."

Lucius grinned evilly and Draco wanted to hit something, namely himself. Lucius was right if he left and got caught which he would he would still loose the one thing that mattered to him most. He shuddered, he'd burn before he let that mad woman anywhere near Shani.

Lucius wasn't done taunting him with the truth, "Oh but you and I know that isn't what will happen. As soon as Potter learns it was me destroying his life and learns you hid me no matter how much you protest he isn't going to believe you. You and I know he'll put you on his little list, and Draco I'll be sure to tell him how much you helped. Potters easy to manipulate in this area. He'd believe the worst of you with no help from me but I'll give him all the help he needs. I don't fear the kiss Draco cause I'll never get it, you and I both know if I'm caught Potter will finish me himself he's vengeful that way, and he'll come after you too. Death or Azkaban and with both you still loose your daughter" Lucius let out a mocking sigh as if he really felt for Draco.

Draco felt sick knowing he had very few choices and none of them were good.

"or" Lucius brightened, "You could continue to hide me and for your sake I'll leave the house when I wish to do spell work. The ministry won't be able to trace it back to this residence and when Potter dies I'll have my vengeance and you and your little daughter can live on in your pathetic existence."

What was he going to do? Did he have much of a choice?

_No, Shani means everything to you. Bellatrix is crazier then Lucius she'd destroy Shani._

"Fine but when Potter dies you leave! Go across the ocean or better yet sink in it but I want you gone hide somewhere else." he bit out bitterly.

He hadn't expected Lucius to agree but to his surprise the man nodded fairly. "Fair enough when my vengeance is complete you'll definitely know it Draco then I'll have to leave."

Draco shuddered feeling a threat in those words but enable to see from where. Draco left Lucius to his cellar hoping the man would honor his word and not do any more magic in the house.

_He's planning to murder Potter and possibly other members of his family._

_If I do anything to stop him I'll at worst die and loose Shani!_

_There's a chance if Harry believes you didn't try to kill him._

_Are you forgetting you've hidden Lucius all this time! That's twenty years in Azkaban at least._

_But Harry would still be alive Lucius would be dead and…_

_Shani would got to the closest living relative, she'd be in the hands of a Lunatic! _

_Unless you appointed a specific guardian for her._

_I've never done that because Bellatrix is an absolute nut who else…_

_The Weasley's are relative's…_

_Don't even think about it, I know what you're thinking Father's right you're so weak! You aren't even the one killing him and you're balking like a school girl._

_If you look the other way then you are killing him._

Draco slammed the door to the cellar shaking. What was he going to do, as much as he denied it if he allowed Lucius to kill Potter he'd be just as guilty as he had been with the headmasters death. He trembled, if Shani ever found out if anyone ever did he'd be just as condemned as he had been then.

He'd condemn himself. He had the excuse of being young and misguided in relation to his last crime. His being a minor had kept him from doing a cell block tango in Azkaban.

If he did what he'd just agreed to he'd be turning his back on everything he'd worked so hard for. There was no excusing it.

_Shani…_

_Perhaps there's another way now that you know what Lucius is up to you can prevent it._

_That means you have to be hanging around Potter and his lot to prevent Lucius's next strike._

Draco groaned, he might just take Azkaban.

**Change Scene**

When Harry woke his first thought was for Ginny, he was scrambling out of the bed someone had laid him in ignoring the slight twinge of pain in his shoulder. Some one had put a healing potion over it but it was still slightly red where the knife had entered.

All the pain in the world could not have kept him in that bed as he rushed from the room and nearly knocked over Charlie who was just beginning to knock on his door.

"IS GINNY…WHERE…" He immediately began to franticly question even as he was trying to scramble past him.

"Ginny's fine she probably had a bit more pain then necessary so she's really tired." Charlie explained griping onto his shoulders to prevent him from running to her.

"Let go of me please, I want to see her" Harry snapped at him to his irritation. Charlie just grinned.

"Don't you want to meet your daughter?"

When his heart leapt into his throat he nearly swallowed it. Joy and elation replaced his fear for a moment. "Where?" he asked.

Charlie grinned knowingly and led him down the hall towards the twins old room. Harry's anticipation flowed through his body like a live thing and Charlie in his mind couldn't move fast enough.

Charlie chuckled swinging the door open and quickly moving out of Harry's way. Harry caught his breath seeing the old-fashioned cradle that he was sure many a Weasley child had slept in near the window. He walked towards it slowly almost fearfully barely giving the medi-witch he didn't recognize standing beside it even a glance.

She was so small, the tiny wisps of red hair glinting like copper in the light of the room her eyes scrunched closed her tiny fingers curled in her sleep. Harry kneeled down next to the cradle watching her sleep with absolute awe taking away his ability to speak.

He reached out his two fingers almost spanning her entire cheek. Her skin was so incredibly smooth if a little flushed looking and what little hair she had was still a bit damp.

Joy.

It sang in his blood stream overwhelmed him to the point of tears. When he turned to the medi-witch his voice cracked a little as he asked. "Does she have a name?"

The woman shook her head smiling at him knowingly. "Your wife the poor dear was too far along to give her pain relief potions she had to bear them the natural way she was too exhausted the poor thing."

Harry reminded of Ginny was suddenly so worried about her he didn't even notice the plural the woman had put into her words. "Is she alright can I talk to her."

"The babies need names Mr. Potter I know you and your wife want to name them together but it's terrible bad luck to go without a name for too long." The medi-witch apologized fretting on her bottom lip.

Charlie snorted from across the room at the woman's superstition.

Harry looked back at his daughter unable to resist the urge to hold her. As he picked her up feeling her tiny bit of warmth next to his heart his heart was so filled with it he knew what her name had to be.

"Name her Joy. I don't think Ginny will mind."

Charlie smiled, shaking his head. "That girls going to have you wrapped around her finger Harry. I don't think Ginny is going to mind at all but your son might need a name too she can choose his perhaps."

It took a moment for Harry to get past his confusion, when the nurses use of the word _them _finally struck him.

"Wait twins! Where is he?" He asked in shock feeling a little bit of anxiety after all if he was fine wouldn't she be with her sister.

Charlie seeing the worry in his eyes was quick to reassure him. "he's with Ginny he needed a few potions, her birthing wasn't as clean as Joy's."

Charlie had barely finished when Harry was moving past him his infant daughter still wrapped safely in his arms. His first sight of Ginny awake if tired looking sent utter relief through his system.

The smile she gifted him with finally broke the damn of his tears. He didn't realize he was crying until one splashed on his daughters pert little nose and it wrinkled. Her eyes flew open and he stared into their brown freckled green, making a rather enchanting hazel in his opinion.

Father and Daughter stared at each other for a moment before her mouth tighten wobbled and she let loose a cry to shake the rafters.

Jane who was standing beside Ginny feeding their son a potion through a bottle looked up and their son who's hair was just as tawny as their daughters if slightly fuller let loose an answering bellow that made his sisters pale.

"Well their lungs work, don't you think they need names to go with their voices." Jane mused humor alight in her eyes.

Harry crossed the room soothing circles into Joy's back to quiet her but their was no quieting her brother. He swore he saw the windows shake with his roar.

It was the most beautiful sound he had ever heard. Refusing to let go of Joy, he took his son from Jane's arms and he knelt down next to Ginny smiling at her through his tears.

"Harry she's beautiful" Ginny sighed with wonder reaching out to touch Joy's cheek much the way he had.

"She's your daughter isn't she, she couldn't be anything else. Her name's Joy." He said kissing Ginny's cheek. He was going to burst from the amount of emotion swelling inside him. He feathered kisses across her cheek unable to put into words just what he felt for her and for the two children she had just given him.

Ginny chuckled softly, "you're going to spoil her aren't you."

He didn't doubt it. He laughed past his tears. "Both of them, he needs a name I'll let you since I named Joy."

His son was still bellowing, his roar would have put an angry bear to shame, Jane shook her head grinning. "He sounds like an angry lion he must be hungry."

Ginny smiled reaching out and Harry placed their squalling son in her arms. "I was thinking of Haven, you know because this is heaven Harry." She placed he hand in his then and squeezed and Harry had to kiss her again. He didn't know how else to express how much he loved her.

Their son's next screech jerked them apart and Ginny said wryly, " You're right Jane, he doesn't sound much like heaven. His name is Lionel."

As their son continued to roar until Jane stuck a bottle, this time filled with formula in his mouth she laughed.

"It fit's. Harry protects you like a lion, belongs to the house of lion makes sense you two would have one. One suggestion Joy sure is cute but how about Joyce it might be a lot to live up to being your joy." She pointed out.

"But she is, Joyce is pretty I like it I can call her joy for short" Harry said.

Jane shook her head, and he allowed her to take both Joyce and Lionel.

Jane left the room and looked back to see that Harry had climbed into bed next to his wife. Ginny was exhausted and likely to fall asleep any moment, Harry looked just as tired but happy to hold her while she slept.

**Change of view**

Jane sighed glancing down at the two bundles in her arms. "With parents like them you two are going to be trouble I just know it. They make you love them though" She informed the two hazel eyed babies who blinked up at her.

"Are they ok?" Ron asked coming out of Pecy's old room. Jane frowned they were keeping Fred locked up in there.

As peaceful and wonderful as the new found parents happiness was their was still trouble ahead.

"They're sleeping. We'll handle everything else in the morning." She answered him.

"But…"

Jane whirled on him. "Ronald Weasley if you go up there and disturb those two I'll make you wish you hadn't!"

Ron blanched putting his hands up. "Wasn't even thinking it, they looked tired your right let them sleep."

Jane smiled at him, "I knew you were a smart man."

As she was laying the twins back in their cradle Seamus walked into the room. "Ah there you are I take it everything's back to normal.'

"As normal as they'll ever be around here Irish." She smiled up at him.

He really was handsome, so boyishly cute she felt like cuddling him like her own personal teddy bear.

_Patience girl all good things come to those who wait._


	18. Chapter 18: Need

It was an hour our so before noon when Draco normally would have sent Neli to escort Shani to the Weasley's not wanting to risk being in the same room with them himself. Today however was different he didn't know how exactly he was going to pull this off but he had to be close to Potter to be able to interfere when his father made his next move.

_Yeah if Potter doesn't toss you out this is the most daft idea that has ever entered your mind._

No use arguing that, it was completely daft. Even Shani was looking at him oddly, wondering why on earth when he'd made it clear he couldn't stand the Weasley's he was taking time off from work no less to watch her work when it wasn't necessary.

He almost turned back when he saw the house.

_Were those pigs outside the house?_

Shani must have noticed his shudder because when she spoke it was slightly defensive. "It's not the most polished place around; but if you don't like it why did you come?"

Draco raised a brow, "touchy this morning are we, I don't believe I said anything."

Shani turned slightly pink and shrugged, " yeah but you had this look. Maybe if you didn't look down your nose all the time you wouldn't trip so much."

Draco recognizing this game hid a grin, "Your nose is sticking up Shani, careful you might catch flies with it."

As usual Shani giggled and snobbishly stuck her nose up and her tongue out at him. When he gave her a sardonic sneer exaggerating his posture till his nose pointed at his feet and his stride was absurdly dainty, she burst out laughing.

Draco grinned.

"Dad you're mental." Shani shook her head but couldn't help erupting into giggles as he pretended to swoon at the sight of the shabby if quaint yard.

"SHANI! GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT!" The sound of excited screeching ended their playfulness and Draco turned to see a little boy come bursting out the front door of the house that looked as if magic alone held it together.

Draco watched in amazement as the little boy came skidding to a halt his arms clasping his daughters legs. The black curls and green eyes alerted him instantly to who's child this had to be. He felt instant dislike.

He was surprised that Shani was letting the little boy put a choke hold on her legs and seemed so familiar with him. Draco's eyes left his daughter as he sensed the altogether unwelcoming stare of his enemy. Harry stood in the door way one hand fisted near his side the other loosely gripping his wand as if he had forgotten it was still in his hand, utterly and completely relaxed.

Judging by the flame of utter hatred in his eyes this was far from the truth. Draco suspected one wrong move from him and Harry could unrelax right quick. The miniature him chattered with his daughter the both of them completely unaware of the tension between their fathers.

"What are you doing here Malfoy?" Harry was the first to speak the bite in his voice as unwelcoming as his stance.

_Like I want to be here._

Draco immediately bristled resenting Potter's tone, as if Draco's carried some sort of stench the immaculate Potter couldn't stand. He was trying to save this mans life and…Draco paled. It fully hit him in that moment exactly what he was trying to do. By trying to thwart his fathers plans he was essentially trying his best to keep Potter alive.

The thought made him sick, maybe this was why he responded so harshly to a jibe he in good sense would have just ignored.

"I've decided to monitor my daughter when she is over here working off her debt. She comes home and it's bad enough I can smell your lot on her I don't want you teaching her your drivel either." He retorted, cringing moments after having said it.

_Way to endear yourself to him Draco._

_I don't need to be his bloody friend. I'll never be his friend. I just need to be around to save his sorry arse._

_He could kick you out then you definitely wont be around!_

Maybe he should practice some restraint, after all he was hardly a school boy anymore and reacting to a jibe like one was hardly the example he wanted to give Shani. He glanced at her and indeed she was watching his every move with the rapt attention of youth. She'd moved away from the little boy and the little boy had moved towards his father.

The lines were clearly drawn. Shani looked up at him and the Potter boy looked up at Potter waiting for some sort of cue from his father.

"What makes you think I'll let you stay here, I don't want you or your kind here you and your daughter can leave!" Harry replied stiffly. His little boys eyes widened and he glanced from his father to them and back then back to them again.

_This picture is…depressing. He's teaching that little boy to hate us out of turn for reasons the kid will never understand and it all could have been avoided._

_The Pot mustn't call the Kettle black does Shani really hate any of these people or is she taking her cues from you?_

Draco sighed suddenly feeling incredibly weary, the anger and hostility leaving his stance and his voice. " Look Potter, I don't want trouble with you don't kick Shani out. It's really important to me that she learn about responsibility. It's also important to me to spend time with her I don't do that enough and these are the last few weeks of summer. I'll stay out of your way if you wish it but…please…allow me to watch her."

**Change view.**

_When the hell did Malfoy get…get…?_

_A soul?_

_Exactly where the hell does he get off cursing me one minute then sounding human the next._

_He's not._

_Apologizing?_

_Malfoy's don't apologize, human that is. Don't forget for a moment what he did. What kind of person it takes to plan a mans death all year!_

_He didn't actually do it…_

_So he's a killer and a coward!_

_He's also a father and the girl didn't do anything._

_She's a Malfoy isn't she!_

_That was beneath you, you know better to blame children for their parents mistakes._

_Lucius father was a Rotter Lucius is…A DEAD MAN…Draco wasn't any better why should she be any different then the rest of her family._

_Because Killers aren't born they're made._

And by all appearances Draco wasn't raising a future death eater or dark witch. He was simply asking him for the chance to teach her something Harry infact wanted to teach his own children.

_Damn_

"you can stay. Just stay out of my way Malfoy."

As he turned back into the house he felt oddly off balance. In all their past arguments Harry had even if not exactly winning the argument been justified as the better man. Why did he suddenly feel as if the tables had turned on him.

_Are you mad, are you forgetting all the Malfoy's have done?_

_Never._

He was gripping his wand so tight it bended to the point of threatening to snap. He released the pressure just in time fighting suddenly for breath past the feeling of tightening in his chest. His rage was a living force in his body. No he had not forgotten nor would he ever.

"Papa, can I help Shani in the garden?" Rory asked tugging on his shirt.

He had been so absorbed with his own throats he had almost forgotten what had drawn him to the door in the first place. The sound of his sons happiness and exuberant shouting had put a smile on his face. A smile that had slipped away as soon as he had seen just whom his son was greeting.

There was a sudden hot lash of anger deep in his gut and he had to battle the urge to grab Rory by the shoulders. To impress upon him the evil of that family and exactly what the deserved. He grit his teeth and steeled himself against it. He was not so far gone with the need for reven…Justice that he would poison his own son with his bitterness.

_Would you? If you tell him no you'll be doing just that._

_I don't want him befriending them! My own brother-in-law tried to kill me and his sister I'd be a complete moron to trust my son with a Malfoy._

Put that way the matter was settled. He couldn't even bloody trust his own family anymore these days there wasn't a chance in hell he was trusting someone he loved with a Malfoy.

He made a compromise.

He picked Rory up holding him close a chord deep within him singing to life in joy at the feel of his small wiry frame held close to him. The unique scent of little boys still baby soft but with new edges of dirt and stickiness that to him was utterly delightful but seemed to be the bane of mothers everywhere.

Holding him like that staring into eyes a slightly paler green then his own that mirrored adoration Harry felt all the emptiness and bitter feelings slide away.

…_I just want to spend time with my daughter…I don't do it enough._

He could understand that smiling down at his son as he was he suddenly felt a connection to Draco Malfoy. He loved his son more then he loved himself and he wanted to teach him only good things. He wouldn't teach him to hate it was an affliction he bore and he would bear it alone. He'd be damned before he passed it on to his children.

"Come on, I happen to know Granmother's made some apple tarts and pumpkin juice. Would you like some of those?" He asked.

Rory's face broke into a bright grin his thin arms twining around Harry's neck in a tight if squirmy hug. "Can we bring some to Shani and her Dad too papa?"

_Not exactly my idea of fun._

Rory was smiling so brightly, it really was kind of him to think of the other girl when the treat had been offered solely to him. How could he say no?

**Change of Scene**

"I never thought I'd see this mum." Ginny sighed shaking her head in wonder from where she sat in front of the window peering into the back garden. Although still slightly tired Jane had given her several healing potions and her body health wise was fit as rain. Still Harry had insisted she take it easy and rest for a few more days. His protectiveness made her smile.

Still one couldn't nap all day she had come down to investigate the warm delicious smells coming from the kitchen. Molly had ushered her in signaling with a finger for her to keep silent. She had wondered exactly why Jane, Clarita, Penny, and Hermione, were watching avidly out the window and her mother was tapping the glass with her wand.

When the voices had filtered inside magically she had received her answer. Of all the things she had ever expected to see in her life two Malfoy's up to their elbows digging in dirt was not high on the list. Shani and her father were digging and yanking furiously and even got into a small dirt fight that Ginny was shocked to see Draco instigate. His playfulness especially with dirt was so out of character, well the way she had always seen him anyway.

If that weren't enough to watch her husband and her son who was carrying a tray of her mothers tots with an air of military concentration, the tray being almost bigger then he was. Ginny watched in amazement as the pair approached the other two and Draco looked up.

She could see instant wariness in Malfoy's eyes even suspicion as Harry suggested he take a break and offered him the juice and tarts.

Penny shook her head, "He's acting like Harry might have filled them with poison."

Hermione snorted, "I'd almost believe that more then what I'm seeing. Malfoy and Harry have been at each other's throats from day one. Did you watch him closely Molly I'm almost afraid he might have slipped something in his pumpkin juice."

Jane furrowed her brow, "Why are they enemies again?"

"Well the story is Harry met Ron first and started to befriend him. Harry being the loyal guy that he is didn't take kindly to Malfoy's attitude towards our family you know. He was a snobby little blighter in those days and Harry stuck up for him and refused Malfoy's offer of friendship refused a handshake and everything." Ginny explained still following the events in the garden.

Rory was gobbling down a tart getting the gooey apple center all over his face, Shani was eating more daintily but was grinning down at Rory trying hard not to choke on her food by erupting in laughter. Draco and Harry were looking everywhere other then each other finally agreeing to settle their eyes on their children mirroring looks of fond parental indulgence flashed on their faces.

"Does no one else not see that these two men have more in common then they do apart?" Jane asked raising a brow.

Hermione scoffed, Penny peered harder at the two as if searching for similarities. Clarita pondered thoughtfully, Molly nodded, Hermione snorted and Ginny paused.

She'd never liked Malfoy's high handedness, his verbal abuse of her family so had never really thought past that. Malfoy really hadn't given her reason to in all fairness, he hadn't exactly made it easy to like him.

While Ginny actually was thinking it over Hermione scoffed at the very notion. "Oh Jane you usually hit it on the money but you've cracked this time. Too men more different I've never seen before. I hate to give into house distinction but there are reasons he's a Slytherin and reasons Harry's a Gryffindor. I would say those are big and major differences."

Jane shook her head, "Hermione darling I love you and lord knows you're very clever. You're very book smart in a way I'll never be but you aren't very _people _smart. The things that make Draco a snake and Harry a lion are the small things. Harry has a tendency to be brave bold idealistic and rash, Draco tends to think analyze plot, and go for gain rather then an ideal."

Everyone nodded, no need to argue that point. Hermione looked oddly startled by Jane's declaration of her not being _people _smart.

"Can everyone agree that however a part of them those things alone don't even scratch the surface of who a person is. It's our experiences, our relationships, and our choices that shape us and let you know who a person really is. Harry was badly neglected as a child and responded by separating himself from that abuse and finding joy in something else. From what I know of Lucius malfoy he couldn't have been a stunning example of fatherhood, it stands to reason Draco was left if not the same circumstance then at least the same feeling of longing that Harry always felt." Jane continued.

Could it be true? Ginny thought of all she knew of the Malfoy family as a whole, all she knew of their glittering world of power games and malice and shuddered. There were many ways a parent could neglect, abuse and hinder a child's growth. It didn't have to be all physical Harry's aunt and uncle had gone easy on the physical abuse it was certainly not as bad as it could have been. The emotional however, simply to deny a child dignity and love was a crime and a punishment of the worst sort.

Harry and Draco might very well have that in common.

"The lion always wants to eat the snake and the snake will always bite back after all but we are human beings not stereotypes. Lets think past all the house mumbo jumbo shall we? Draco as much as we would like to grumble otherwise did not become a depraved death eater. Oh he made his fair share of blunders and adopted his fair share of nasty habits but he was a child and I don't think any of us can deny with the example set before him that as a child he would be influenced."

Even Hermione nodded grudgingly to this. Molly sighed, "Children will do as their parent's do, it's the way of nature."

Jane nodded, "Exactly until they're old enough to make choices for themselves. Sometimes it's too late their habits our to engrained their world too narrow to ever change. Harry did not become what his aunt and uncle wanted him to be, they did not drive the magic or the spirit from him."

" Draco did not become the man his father wanted of him. Both of them severed their ties with their pasts and moved on to become their own men. Strong men, both of them work hard, try even harder and are extremely protective of their children. Both are by all accounts wonderful children and both have a sense of right and wrong. Both can't seem to always get it right for themselves but like any father want to see their kids get it right." Molly added.

"They are both stubborn, judgmental, hold grudges have issues with forgiveness, can be vindictive, a tad bit blood thirsty when it suits them and most importantly. They have both tried so hard to separate themselves from their demons the things that chain them to their pasts, to their mistakes and their weaknesses and both are failing miserably. But that's just my opinion."

There was silence as they all digested this. As Ginny watched her husband and the man who had been his enemy since their first meeting she watched them both in awe.

Jane was right they were so very much alike despite all the differences of their experiences, and backgrounds. Their natures were the same, both of them were good men. Misguided at times, even good men could stray but at the core they were essentially the same and essentially wanted the same things.

To love and to be loved in return. To protect those they loved even at cost to themselves. Draco had paid a heavy price for his loyalty to those he loved. Had almost committed murder in cold blood at the urging of those who were closest to him.

But he hadn't. Ginny as she watched him didn't believe it was cowardice either. If it was cowardice that had made him unable to kill the headmaster even surrounded by fellow death eaters who would more then happily turn on him, if it was cowardice that had turned him gray and desperate his entire sixth year after the youthful idealism had warn away, and if it was cowardice that had halted his hand in the final moment and reduced him to tears then perhaps the world needed a few more cowards.

Ginny laughed shaking her head, why in the world had no one seen this before. Why didn't they see it themselves.

Perhaps in time they would , Ginny thought as she watched her son scooping up handfuls of dirt next to Shani, and her husband amiably if silently working next to his worst enemy.

**Change of scene.**

Harry wiped the sweat off his brow glancing up at the sun it had come down in the sky he suspected it was late afternoon. Around the time Shani usually finished, and as soon as he thought it Shani let out a jubilant cry tossing off her gloves with a sigh of relief. She and Rory promptly left to get washed up even though Harry saw it as a bit of a lost cause, for Shani's pants were streaked with dirt.

He had just spent several hours digging in a garden with Malfoy of all people. Oddly enough Malfoy had not done any of the things Harry would have expected. There was no moans of the unfairness of being forced to labor, no complaints not even a grimace at being dirty. In fact Malfoy appeared content to work beside his daughter even tease her with the dirt and if Harry was reading the lightning of his features correctly he was actually enjoying the time spent in the sun with her even if it was mucking about in a garden.

Even more surprising, he had even tried to make conversation with Harry. Admittedly it was stiff and formal but it was still an attempt at pleasant conversation that baffled him. Chatting about the uses of the Debajor weed growing rather avidly in the Weasley garden was perhaps the most pleasant conversation the two of them had ever shared.

Harry discovered that Malfoy oddly knew a lot about plants, to which Malfoy had actually admitted shockingly that he didn't really know much about plants unless they were used in some potion. That in itself wasn't shocking but that Malfoy would admit to a shortcoming was.

Then they had naturally switched from plant's to Malfoy's job, to which Harry was surprised to learn that while he had been drinking himself into a stupor Draco had worked in a brewery and lived elegantly if simply with his wife and children.

"Roslyn and I were happy then. We were both really good potion brewers and I was rising up in the business. We had a lot of friends and Ros, really liked the social scene…." Draco explained nonchalantly as if they were still discussing weeds instead of personal experiences.

Harry could only listen and watch and the closer he looked at the other man the more he got the feeling that Malfoy had not enjoyed his wife's glittering parties or fancy living for the sake of being wealthy or powerful in itself. He when the corner of his thin pursed lips tweaked in a wistful memory of a smile he knew that Malfoy had in his own way loved his wife and it was watching her enjoyment of the glitter that had made it all worth while.

The same way that he hated muggle movies could not see much point in them but Ginny was fascinated with them. He would take her to the theater sometimes and the way her eyes would move rapidly with the moving frames and tiny things like the musical score made her excited he would take delight in. Watching her light up was more then worth the boredom.

"I kind of expected it all to end in the back of my mind though, I couldn't believe I had done what I had done and still gotten off so lightly. It's true I had told my father where he could shove it and was trying to live for myself but I always felt like I was franticly building a castle made of sand but no matter how grand it was the tide would always eventually come in." Malfoy was saying.

Harry understood that, hell he was living it. His family was his castle, his dreams his very heart but they did indeed feel as if they were made of sand. How easily they could slide right through his fingers filled him with despair.

Draco's question was completely unexpected. " Potter do you want to kill my father?"

Harry blinked at him in shock. Trying to piece together an answer that wouldn't offend rather enjoying the way the conversation was going. The other half of him wanted to shout a passionate yes to spit on all things Malfoy and was shamed that he had forgotten for a moment just who he was talking to.

"Don't bother answering I can see it in your eyes. Your entire face changes when you think about him. _You_ change when you think about him." Malfoy sighed.

Harry felt instant anger beginning to boil, if Malfoy spoke one word of defense for his father so help him. This was one point Harry refused to budge on could not budge on. He was afraid of what would happen, what would be left if he gave up his soul claiming need for…retribution. Justice.

_Vengance_

"Don't say it Malfoy. Don't defend him. I can't stand it! You have no idea what it was like to live with…"

He couldn't say it aloud still couldn't speak of it, the pain the terror it was too close waiting to swallow him whole. Justice was all he lived for.

"With the memories. I tried so damn hard to drown them away I nearly destroyed what was left of my life. When I finally realized that I was only throwing my life away I stopped trying but it was horrific. Without the liqour my mind had free range to terrorize me. To remind me of every single horrific detail. I have stood about as close to death by my own hand as I ever want to stand and it was the thought of becoming an Auror and punishing those who could be as evil as your father that gave me purpose." He finished heatedly his hands unconsciously clenching in the dirt.

Malfoy sighed again but was watching him intently. "When did you change your purpose Potter?"

Was he ever going to throw him a question that didn't completely throw him off track. "What?" Harry asked baffled not having a clue what Malfoy was getting at.

"Well you had very good reason to hate all Death Eaters and you used your thirst for their demise as a purpose. Not exactly a shining purpose but an understandable one. No one would blame you…" Draco sighed again he seemed to be doing a lot of that today as if with each sigh he was expelling some long buried emotion from his body. With each sigh he gained a little more clarity and the weight that had always been on his shoulders lifted a little more.

" I don't blame you Potter. Well I did, and have for a very long time. I'm willing to admit when I've been wrong. I didn't know anything about you Potter or your struggles yet I judged you anyway. You made your choices to the best of your experience and your ability. The consequences weren't the best for me but they were a direct result of _my_ choice. Anyway the point is vengeance is no longer your purpose, at least it shouldn't be. It looks to me as if you have a family and that should be your first and foremost purpose. They are aren't they, or are you going to risk loosing them because you want vengeance?" Draco finished sitting quietly waiting for his reply.

A reply that Harry had ready and it was the simple truth. "I need to kill him. There is a difference between wanting and needing Malfoy. On a hot day I might want a fan but do I really need one? I _need _this."

Truth, the need of it was consuming fire somewhere deep in his core and if he let it burn unhindered the inferno would destroy him. Only the death of his enemies would quench the hot and hungry flames in his tortured soul.

"You have it wrong you know. It's something I learned the hard way. Here's some advice Potter if its all consuming, if it seems like you can't breath without it, can't sleep over it then you desire it. You want it and desire has been the downfall of man since the first! When you want a woman she intrudes upon your thoughts and even effects your body. When you need a woman there is no need to obsess for there is no question in your mind. It's subtle it's hidden until the lack becomes too painful to ignore and that is a soul kind of pain. Think of air, you can't even see it most the time you don't even think about it but you most definitely need it. Do you think about each breath you take, no you just do it." Draco seemed to be musing aloud at first but then his voice became stronger more sure of himself and more passionate about the truth he spoke.

"We naturally seek what we _need _without thought. We pursue what we want because we only think we need it when often it is more likely to harm us then help us. You say you wanted to burry your memories Potter, so you persuade alcohol and sex to make it all a senseless blur. No need to point out how dangerous that was to you but at the time you were convinced you needed that right? Have you ever asked yourself why you decided to room with the Lupins after graduation? Hell Potter you had enough money to buy half a country and still be set for life you could have lived anywhere, in fact perusing your want of strong drink and women would have been easier if you lived on your own."

No he had never thought on it, it had never seemed all that important. They were good friends and they had offered and Harry had not even thought twice about saying no.

Draco continued, " Because you needed help. Anybody who knows they have a problem and is content to keep it that way doesn't go where he knows his habits will be in threat of changing. You didn't want the help Potter but you needed it so you naturally went to where you could get it. Potter trust me I know I thought all that I ever needed in the world was my fathers aprooval but to get it I had to sell my soul didn't I. I may have wanted it and it wasn't a bad want but getting it would have destroyed any goodness left in me wouldn't it. I know what I did was unforgivable and you have no reason to trust me or to forgive me. I can't even give myself those things cause I know I don't deserve them. It's why I could never…"

Harry looked up as Malfoy faltered his eyes shifting and he rapidly changed course. "Well I knew as angry as it made me, as much as I hated you for it that you were doing the right thing. And your job by the way. I may not have killed him myself but I am very much responsible and as much as others urged me to strike back I decided to take responsibility for my actions. That's why I didn't struggle that night Potter, the night you dragged me before the ministry and I was tried. That's why I let them stamp those red letters onto my name. I regret it, not for myself but for Shani. When I accepted the responsibility for them I didn't know how they would brand my daughter. How people could hate her because of me."

Draco's eyes lifted to bore into Harry's his next words declared so passionately Harry felt he had never seen such conviction. "That's why it's important to figure out what you need Potter. I think you have it backwards. You think you wanted the Weasleys to be your family and for Ginny to be your wife. You were willing to fight for them but didn't really think it would work and if it didn't you'd have been sad but you could live on. You think what you need is vengeance that without it you would fall apart, destroy yourself. I have a child of my own and I've seen the way you look at yours. I've seen the way you look at your wife Harry and you have it completely backward. What you need is always more subtle, it always seems like less compared to that which you want."

Harry felt a wave of shame recalling his earlier attitude towards Shani, towards Draco. When had Draco gotten so…smart?

Life, experience and hard taught lessons. Draco was no longer a child and oddly Harry felt more like a lost and lonely little boy more then ever. Perhaps that was why he grudgingly admitted the truth he never thought he would admit. "I don't hate you Malfoy"

There was a startled sound somewhere between a laugh and a snort as Malfoy blinked at him in bewilderment. " Oh so you like me then? Best mates are we now?"

Harry grit his teeth the blonde's usual sarcastic remarks irritating him as they always did. "Don't hold your breath on the best mate thing. You don't want me as one and trust me the feeling is mutual. I'm just saying as of right now I don't particularly hate you either."

This time Malfoy definitely snorted as he sneered at Harry one eye brow raised disdainfully. " Oh really? I suppose I should be grateful your tempers in control. Heaven knows I live for the days you don't wish to kill me. Only I could be so lucky a full day where Harry Potter does not wish to end my sorry life. What temple should I cast my worthless body on to worship? I…"

Harry needed to shut the man up and as he was in a particularly light mood indeed killing Draco was far from his thoughts, he settled to shoving a clod of dirt down the open and flapping mouth that was irritating him.

Watching Draco spit and sputter so indignantly was well worth any irritation, and Harry got so much laughter out of it that he felt it was well worth the mutinous glare he received in return.

"You are such a child Potter!" Draco seethed. When the sound of girlish giggling reached his ears Draco turned to see his daughter and Rory had returned and both were laughing as madly as Harry was. Draco's eyes narrowed but there was a playful glint in his eyes.

"Oh you think it's funny do you?"

Harry had never thought he would see the day he had fun with a Malfoy, the day where he he willingly got into a mud fight with one either.

Today was a day for things he thought he would never see. As the sun sank lower in the sky the laughter of the two adult men behaving no better then their children, who's lighter laughter mixed with their own made the women in the kitchen smile.

"They'll all need baths, probably muck up the floor tramping in when they're done." Penny ever neat as a pin sighed.

"Well worth the dirt, I love it when he laughs like that." Ginny smiled resting one hand on the glass as if she could reach out and capture the sound and hold it to her.

"Like he's free? Perhaps in time he will be." Molly said coming to stand next to her daughter.

"Perhaps nothing! That boys going to be free as a bird by the time I'm done with him. He better be listening to Draco I couldn't have said it better myself." Jane said crossing her arms and joining them.

"Does he even notice he's far happier like this then plotting revenge?" Angelina asked shaking her head.

Jane rolled her eyes. "Of course not, he _needs _this weren't you listing. It's like air you don't even notice you do it you just do it."

"We get it Jane" Hermione sighed rolling her eyes.

"Well that's fine and Dandy but he's the one that needs to get it. But since it's something he needs he won't even know he needs to know and since that's another thing he…"

Angelina swatted her with a towel.

**Change of Scene**

Later that night after the entire family had met and gathered for dinner and the kids had been put into bed the Weasley's and Potters gathered around the kitchen table to discuss what each of them had been putting off and dreading.

"What are we going to do about Fred?" Bill asked what was on all of their minds.

Now that the question was thrown on the table everyone was quick to throw in their opinion.

"He tried to murder Gin, and Harry in cold blood he's lost his mind completely and he could still be dangerous." Charlie.

"It's Fred we know him. We know what he's like he's our brother and he isn't bloody dangerous! We're his family." George looking thunderous.

"Family members who try to stab other family members are dangerous!" Bill.

"He's sick, George is right. He's my husband and I know him the only one who knows him better is George. Fred hasn't been well for months now. He doesn't eat he doesn't sleep. He has nightmares and he see's things. They are real to him, he says Ginny became some sort of beast and tried to kill him." Angelina defended her husband.

"Well I didn't incase that was in question I was busy trying to have a baby." Ginny responded wryly.

No one felt like laughing.

"Look I know my boy and you lot know your brother. It's not in question that the Fred we know wouldn't mean to harm…" Arthur began

Harry stood up interrupting him his voice soft but hard as steel. "Excuse me for disagreeing I've fought with men who don't mean to harm. It's called a practice session and when he tried to stab Ginny, when he did stab me he was most definitely not practicing. I didn't want to kill him as I thought I would have to, as I would have had to if you all had not arrived in time. Had I continued to fight him not meaning harm he would have killed me."

Angelina bit her bottom lip Harry suspected to keep it from trembling. "What then hand him over to the Auror's? Do you know how much time attempting to murder two people would get him in Azkaban?"

George suddenly pushed out of his chair causing it to topple backwards, "Like hell! Don't talk crazy Angie, no one's handing Fred over to the ministry. He's sick lack of sleep and a fever got the best of him caused him to hallucinate that's all. He regrets it guys, he's crying up in that room you've turned into a prison."

"Don't look at me like that son we had to take precautions." Arthur sighed wearily.

"I think it would be best to turn Fred over to a Healing facility they have special wards for…illnesses like his." Percy put in shaking his head sadly but firmly.

Angelina gasped shaking her head. "Fred is not insane!"

"He tried to Kill two people what bloody qualifies as insane? I don't like it either but snapped is snapped and he did it!" Ron insisted. Clarita put a hand on his arm.

"Perhaps it was a fever like George suggested?" Alicia offered glancing worriedly at her husband who was pacing angrily looking ready to go on a rampage of his own.

"Other thin his gauntness a loss of weight and a serious need of sleep Fred is physically fine." Percy shook his head.

George immediately rounded on him, "Who died and made you Healer? What do you even know about it? He is not fine! He's sick with something and he needs us, but then again Percy I wouldn't of expected better of you. Everyone knows when the going gets tough in this family Percy gets going."

Percy immediately stiffened and Penny glared at George quickly coming to Percy's defense. Alicia flinched casting them an apologetic glance.

"George this hardly calls for old mud." She placed a hand on his arm trying to get him to sit.

"Oh no if he has something to say to me he should say it, it's not wise to keep all that anger bottled up inside." Percy challenged his voice cold despite his agreeable words.

"Yeah I have something against you Percy. I have something against the way you can turn your back on this family then think you have a trolls snot of say in how we handle our problems." George responded to the challenge his voice as full of fire as Percy's had been full of ice.

"BOYS!" Molly's sharp reprimand halted Percy who had risen from his chair and George who had gone to meet him. "If you're going to act like children the lot of you can just go join them and go to bed. Those of us who know better will stay here and discuss what we're to do with my son and your brother! With love and tolerance if you don't mind and if you can't abide by that then I'll box your ears and send you to bed, see if I don't." Catching Ron's snicker she glared at him. " I don't care how old you are Ronald Weasley I still have a mind and the will to take you over my knee!"

George still smarting and Percy looking ruffled sat down forced to be content with glaring at each other from across the table.

"The way I see it this issue is too close to home, lawfully we should have called an Auror as soon as it happened…" Ginny began when George opened his mouth she waved him to silence. "But we can all agree as people who love him that we don't want him facing life in Azkaban he's got a wife and a child to take care of and we know he wouldn't do this unless he was seriously ill or otherwise bewitched. However if it's an illness like we think it is, or if he's just gone mad as Percy suggest he could be dangerous to others and if it's found out we knew he had already attempted murder and hid it has anyone stopped to think where that will land the family? In the cell right next door."

Silence permuted the room, Ginny was right none of them wanted to hand Fred over to the ministry and the thought of locking him up in St. Mungo's with the severely magically or otherwise mentally addled wasn't a happier prospect.

Harry's eyes raked over each member of his family noting their pain, watching the anguish and indecision on their faces.

Ron suddenly perked up as if he had found the answer to all their troubles. He turned to Harry. "Harry You're an Auror"

_Yes you're the Auror make a decision._

Part of him the part of him that remembered the bite of the knife, watching Fred try and harm Ginny and their babies that were struggling to come into the world flared to life with rage.

_He attempted to murder Ginny, and he would have succeeded! He would have if you hadn't of had those dreams to warn you. You would have lost her! And if you want icing on the cake he almost killed you! Cart him in for trial, you're an Auror it's your job your duty you would do it to any other wizard without batting an eye._

Then the part of him that remembered two laughing boys slinging arms around him, teasing him in school corridors and sticking up for him against Umbridge flared to life and the thought of doing his duty as an Auror in this case made him ill. Thinking of sending him to St. Mungos didn't ease the pain either. He knew what awaited him there. Would Fred lay motionless and unseeing like some in the ward? Would he live in a world that only he understood sometimes rabid and other times heartbreakingly normal asking them when he could come home?

_I can't do that to him. Fred doesn't belong in a place like that._

_YES HE DOES. HE TRIED TO KILL YOU._

He wanted to say no, to allow Fred his freedom but he _needed _to lock him up. It was as simple as that…

Wanting and needing…Harry paused Draco's words of this afternoon floating to the surface of his mind.

Flitting the edges of his conscience were the memories of his love for Fred but it was blocked out by the hot and furious need to punish for the fear and agony Fred had caused him.

Backwards…he had it BACKWARDS!

_Fred nearly took my wife from me, he scared the hell out of me nearly robbing me of everything. I want to lock him up and throw away the key, but What I need to do is remember how much I really love him. I need to…forgive him. To trust that we can find a way to help him._

"Well from my assessment of the situation, Mr. Weasley did show signs of distress but at this time I don't think his intention was to kill." Harry started slowly.

The bald face lie rang through the room like a gun shot. George was blinking at him like he'd never seen him before. Of everyone there Harry had the most reason and the most right to want to see Fred locked up. George might of hated him for the decision but deep down he would have known Harry had every right. It was the smart thing to do.

"He'll have to be monitored though and in the morning I'll take him to St. Mungo's for a magic screening. If spell work was involved we'll know. Other then that I don't believe he needs a trial or further magical treatment." Harry finished feeling as if a wieght was lifting from his shoulders.

It may not be the smart thing but it was the right thing. Fred deserved a chance, and Harry would give it to him.

George was gulping looking for all the world as if he might weep with relief, or jump up and hug Harry. He chose the later, clasping Harry so tightly for a moment he couldn't breath.

"Thanks mate." He whispered, then he let go of Harry and sat back down. He glanced over at Percy and sighed. "And I'm sorry for what I said Percy."

"You were upset. Understandable of all of us you're closest to him." Percy waved away his apology.

When Hermione spoke for the first time her voice was soft and almost sad. "Harry you don't have the authority to do what you just did. If Fred hurts some one it's true now the rest of us won't go to Azkaban with him but you'll loose your job Harry. The media will have a field day."

Harry shrugged, he knew the danger but he needed to do this. Realizing it gave him more conviction more peace of spirit then he'd ever experience. Draco was right when you knew what you needed there just wasn't any doubt. "He's my brother and he wouldn't try to hurt us of his own free will. My job and the media be damned Hermione I'll give him all the time he needs."

Ginny's hand slid in his till their fingers laced together. She gave his a soft squeeze all the love and pride she felt for her husband in this moment shining in her eyes.

"But Harry your job means so much to you" Hermione insisted.

"My family means more." Harry replied truthfully not taking his eyes off his wife's amazed at this overwhelming sense of peace…of rightness that he felt.

Ron laughed softly, "Give it up Mione. If you haven't learned by now that Harry never cares about his own skin then you never will."

**Change of scene**

Lucius snarled. His mewling little son had inadvertently cost him some of his victory. Potter was changing, adopting the drivel that his son held so tightly to his craven little breast. He had expected Potter to follow through and convict the wretch. What kind of fool suffered an attack as Potter had done, nearly dieing in the effort to save his little bitch of a wife, and forgave his attacker?

He was so absorbed in his own anger he did not notice the Celar door crack open.

Was Potter mad?

No the fool was weak. And he had Draco to thank for Potter's sudden weakness.

His lip curled as he angrily paced glancing towards the ceiling of the cellar. Oh what he wouldn't give to kill the little bastard with his bare hands.

_Patience, your son will get what's coming to him. You will bind him, the daughter will get it first. He'll scream and scream as he watches simply murdering him now is not enough. Not nearly enough._

But what to do? If Potter was going to show this new found tendency to _forgive _his plans would come to naught.

Unless…

What had the little mud blood said? Harry had put his job on the line. Yes, yes indeed if the Weasley brat snapped again and heaven forbid murdered people in a public place and the public knew that Potter had decreed him safe without the authority to do so. Potter would be out of a job and out of the publics good graces.

Not enough not nearly enough.

The thought of Fred suffering had divided the family put them at each others throats. If Potter was forced to kill the wretch Potter would be out a family. Out of everything.

Potter was taking weasel out of the house alone in the morning. And as part of their pact Lucius was doing magic outside of the house. Even if Draco was of a mind to stop him he wouldn't know where to find him.

Lucius grinned throwing back his head and laughing, Draco had inadvertently handed him his victory. Perhaps in reward he would kill the daughter second.

"Tomorrow you loose Potter, tomorrow finally you will suffer!" He crowed so absorbed in his delight her did hear the door slowly close.

A/n: Sorry this chappy took so long. I'm headed of for New England where my older Bro is getting married. I'll be staying with my Nana for a while and her computer belongs in the stone age and the internet is a joke. Don't know when I'll be back I might decide to hang with her a while she's getting older and needs a lot of help. Chapter 19 should be here this afternoon and just to warn you, you wont be happy at the end. I'm sorry I didn't plan on having to leave until monday but things happen.


	19. Chapter 19: Hide River

_What had Grandfather meant, today Potter would suffer?_

Shani's thoughts were restless as she sat at the table her breakfast untouched and getting colder by the minute. Grandfather hated the Potters she knew that but he never left the house. He couldn't possibly hurt the Potters from the cellar could he?

_So what if he does? Isn't that what you want?_

Wasn't it? A month ago Shani would have thought so but now she wasn't so sure. Molly as much as she tried not to care, was warm and motherly. Shani as hard as she resisted it found she liked the woman. She liked the way she listened even the way she bustled about sticking her nose in her children's lives whether they wanted her there or not.

She would never like Frankie, it was a wonder with a Grandmorther like Molly he had turned into such a self important little blighter. Rory however, well it was impossible not to like the little imp. He was a scamp to be sure but he had a natural defense in being so irresistible it was hard to stay angry with him, instead you just wanted to hug him even if what he deserved was a kick in the arse. Perhaps he got that from Potter, whom she was finding she didn't hate quiet as much as she should. Yesterday had been fun, the best day she'd had since the old days when mum and Jacob had been alive.

Father looked happier then she'd ever seen him. He had come out of his room with a smile and it had remained on his face longer then her own. Seeing him like that made her happy and the fact that an evening spent at Potters place could make him seem so carefree was just one more reason she suddenly hated the thought of Grandfather hurting the Potters.

Shani sighed pushing her plate away. She had to talk to father.

**Change of Scene**

"You'll be alright whatever bug you've got St. Mungo's will have you fixed in no time." Angelina reassured her husband softly. Her palm was resting on his cheek as her eyes searched his face. Fred was far too pale his face almost ashen. His eyes had purple shadows around them and the haunted wretched expression in them tore at her heart.

"He should lock me up. Don't let me go with him Angie I might hurt him." Fred pleaded with her softly his eyes wide with fear. Angelina could feel him trembling beneath her hand and her eyes welled with tears. Seeing him like this, all she knew of Fred was laughter and bold vigor. He attacked life with a devil may care attitude that had always drawn her too him. To see him so small and frightened was unfair, it was a crime to her senses and a nail in the region of her heart.

"Then don't, you won't Fred." She leaned into him just to feel closer to him, desperate to feel his arms around her the memory of their strength all she had to hold onto.

Fred trembled. Angie was wrong he knew something terrible was about to happen, Harry was trying to help him to protect him and he would be hurt. Fred knew that with all the certainty in his being. It was like a gathering storm when he looked to the skies of his soul he could see the black clouds gathering on the horizon and he was terrified.

_I am done being terrified. Only I can protect my family from myself._

"Where's Taylor?" He asked needing to see his son before he did what he knew he had to do. As if he had been waiting for his fathers cue their eight year old son opened the door almost shyly. Fred watched him walk towards them drinking in the sight of his bronzed skin and dark hair off set with a startling pair of blue eyes. He felt the same glow of pride the same aching love he always felt when his son walked into a room.

He knelt before him memorizing each line of his face each plane and every curve. He was beyond beautiful, to have created such a wonder was beyond him and all of the trembling despair inside him stilled. He would do anything for his family. He smiled at him knowing all the love that he felt for him was laid plain for him to see.

"Taylor I have to leave for a while." he said and Taylor nodded.

His eyes were wide and solemn he was too young to understand fully what was happing around him but he knew that things were not right. " I know Pa, Mum told me."

"I wanted you to know before I left just how much I love you. And even when I'm not here with you that doesn't change. I need you to look out for your mum while I'm gone can you do that?" he asked smoothing his sons dark hair smooth even though it didn't need it. It was an excuse to touch him to remain touching him as long as he dared.

_I want to be here, I want to be here for his first year at Hogwarts and for every birthday after this one. I want to see his first Quiditich game when he's old enough to ride a broom. I want to watch him chase girls and watch him catch that one special one. I want…_

_So very little. Is that too much to ask for?_

The darkness had come it had reached him, he could feel it gathering. He had run out of time. There was only one path he could take to protect that which he loved most. His family.

_Are you ok?_

It wasn't actually words, more like waves of feeling that he always seemed able to place into words and they bore the distinct aura of his twin. They had been connected since birth each of them knowing the others fears and wants almost instinctively. George knew when he was upset he could cloak his growing despair from everyone else even his wife. Never from George.

_I love you George._

He did not need to speak the words, he need only feel them with all his strength and he knew George would feel it in return.

He felt Georges fear.

_Don't._

Oh but he had too. Fred stood watching Taylor cross the room and clasp his mothers hand. "I love you both." his voice was soft but it still cracked with the emotion threatening to overwhelm him.

"You'll be back in a few hours. Promise me Fred." Angelina pleaded. Perhaps she had sensed something was wrong after all. Fred had never lied to his wife about anything that wasn't trifle before. Today he looked her in the eye and lied.

"I promise"

**Change scene**

"Angie, where's Fred. He told me to meet him out front but he's not there." Harry asked Angelina after knocking softly on the door to her room.

She stiffened turning to him and Harry was shocked to see her start to tremble. When she didn't answer Harry felt dread sinking into his blood stream like a poison.

"Angeilina I need to know where he is." Harry tried not to push her but the urgency in his tone made her flinch.

"I don't know. I knew something was wrong I knew it. He'll be right back he promised me Harry he promised me." The last part of her sentence came out more as a plea then a statement.

"Water. He's near rushing water." the sound of Georges voice surprised both of them. Harry turned to see him standing just behind him.

He didn't ask how George knew, now wasn't the time. He just knew he had to reach Fred fast it was a demanding drum beat of fear in his very blood.

Rushing water, where in the world could he be?

Hide River the only major body of water anywhere near here.

He was tensing to Apeariate from the room when George caught his arm. "Please bring him back Harry. Promise me you wont let him get hurt."

How could he make that promise and keep it? How on earth was he to stop a man bent on hurting himself or others.

Angelina looked so forlorn where she sat trembling on the bed she usualy shared with her husband. Goerge looked like a strong wind would shatter him. Harry felt determination clench in his gut, he'd be damned before anything happened to his family.

"I promise. I'll bring him back don't worry."

And then with a bang Harry was gone.

**Change scene**

The woods surrounding Hide River were dark and green even in the morning sunlight. As Fred walked the wood seemed to fall before him his vision blurring as he followed the edge of the river the overgrown path beside it winding back and forth like a snake. Up ahead there were two young muggle men fishing from a dock. He knew instinctively approaching them was a danger. He needed to stay away from living people. He turned his back on them. He would find a spot down river.

A spot where the water ran deep and fast that would carry away the threat to his family.

_Don't Don't don't don't don't_

The waves of his twins emotion crashed on the shores of his soul accompanied by the raging wind of his own denial of what he was about to do. There was no other way. As long as he lived he was a threat.

His tears fell silently having worn out his voice from sobbing much earlier.

He stood on the bank his entire body shaking with his tembling. He couldn't do it. He had to do it.

He wanted to live.

The dark was incredibly endless.

He had to.

He hesitated.

And then it was too late. His vision was flashing red and the darkness consumed him. He turned to the teenagers on the dock.

**Change scene:**

Harry appeared in the one spot in Hide park he was familiar with. The fishing dock was really the only reason he had ever had to be in Hide park at all. What he saw when his vision finally focused made his heart leap into his throat.

The screaming of the young man as he watched Fred's hands wrap around his companion and squeeze haunted Harry's ears beating at him. He raised his wand but then lowered it. He couldn't hurt Fred but he couldn't allow him to choke a teenager to death either.

He tackled him instead. Wrenching the older man away from the teenager with all his strength. Fred was like a wild beast snarling and frothing at the mouth completely ignoring the young man who lay gasping at his feet. He instead attacked Harry with all that he was worth.

Harry blocked his advances as best he could but the dock did not leave him a lot of room to evade Fred. He was at a serious disadvantage trying as he was not to actually hurt him.

"FRED!" Harry tried to reach him even as he blocked a solid swing of the mans arm that had been delivered with enough force it might have broken his neck if it had hit him.

His fury seemed to lend him inhuman strength as he grabbed up one of the teenagers fishing poles and whipped it at his face. Harry had not expected the move nor could he really see the silver hook as it whipped across his face snagging in his cheek and tearing as it passed him.

Harry cried out as his cheek erupted in pain and he staggered. Fred was lashing at him again and this time the hook caught in his shirt tearing the skin beneath and ripping the cloth.

And still he refused to hurt him.

_He will kill you._

"Fred…Fred please" Harry pleaded falling to his knees as he felt a stinging searing pain in his neck. The hook had caught him in the throat and blood was running freely from the wound. He found it hard to speak as the copper taste of blood welled inside his mouth.

_Kill him. You have too._

_No._

Harry couldn't kill him but perhaps he could knock him senseless. Harry gripped his wand tighter as Fred advanced on him fishing pole ready for another lash his eyes rolling back into his head. Harry sprang to his feet and just as Fred reared back his arm Harry shouted an incantation."

Fred stumbled backwards a look of shock on his face. Harry's satisfaction turned to horror as he saw that the edge of the dock was directly behind Fred the companion of the teenager whom he had been choking had been leaning over his friend had stood in fear to run as Fred approached.

Fred knocked into the boy and both of them went toppling into the river.

Hide River was not the roughest river around but there was a nasty bend where the water curved and was surrounded by jagged rocks. Many an unwary human had fallen into the river too close to daggers bend and died smashed against those rocks.

Harry didn't even think twice he sent up a red jet of sparks that he knew would reach high in the sky and boom louder then any fireworks display ever had. The standard call for Aurors.

Then he dove into the swirling waters.

**Change scene.**

"WHERE IS HE WHERE'S POTTER" Draco popped into existence so suddenly in front of Penny she screamed.

"Hide Park he went to hide park we're afraid Fred meant to throw himself in the river." Ginny answerd him her voice tight with anguish and fear.

It was clear Draco wasn't going to waist time hashing it over with them. For a moment Ginny thought he had already gone when a faint booming was heard and the windows rattled slightly.

"What was that?" Penny asked frightened.

Draco rushed to the window looking towards the sky and Ginny went with him. Up in the sky faint because of its distance was a red phoenix. The Aurors mark of distress.

Harry…she just knew it.

Draco must have come to the same conclusion she could see his body tensing to pop out of existence in their small front parlor. Ginny didn't think twice, Harry needed her and he had fought his battles alone for far too long.

She grabbed his arm and just as he started in surprise they appeared on the dock in Hide Park.

She fought to regain control of her senses fighting off the pressure in her ears. A boy lay shuddering and gasping on the edge of the dock crying out as he peered into the water.

"Bill! BILL!" He shouted his voice sounding like grating sand paper. Ginny looked around franticly for Harry but the boy was alone.

"What happened here, who's Bill" Draco was asking the teenager kneeling down beside him.

Ginny noted there were purple and ugly bruises marring his throat. It looked as if someone had tried to strangle the kid. She leant down and ran a soothing hand over his throat to ease the pain he must be feeling trying to speak.

"me…best…mate…" The boy gasped. And then Ginny gapped in horror as he pointed out over the water. Careening down the river so far away they were already just dots were…three people. It was hard to say it might only be two the heads kept disappearing under the water and repapering somewhere else tossed like toys by the river. One was red and one or maybe two were black. Bill and Fred were out there Harry was no where to be found. He had had sent out the call for distress Ginny knew he had been here.

He was in the water headed for daggers bend.

"Damn it Potter!" Draco cursed thrusting off his cloak as if he would dive In after them.

"Wait the waters too strong swimming it is not an option you'll just end up like them in need of rescuing." her heart was hammering in fear but she struggled to think clearly past the panic. "We need a boat!"

**Change of view.**

The water crashed over his head again sucking him within it's depths breaking his stride once again and thrusting him had against the bank.

He fought against the wave of dizziness against the harsh depths that clung to his skin dragging him below. He fought his way back to the surface and kicked out again desperate to reach

…someone anyone…

His heart beat a frantic tattoo of fear, he realized even if he caught Fred before he reached daggers end he wasn't strong enough to fight the current. They were both going to die.

The three of them he could suddenly see another dark head pop out of the water in front of him. Hear the young boys cries of terror as the water swept him along. Harry desperately swam harder until he was close enough to clasp onto the boys shirt. As soon as he had the water sucked the both of them under again and they went spinning against another bank this one with several tree roots sticking out of it's edge where the water had warn away the edge.

As he came up to the surface. He could see a soaked and trembling Fred grasping desperately to the protruding root. There was room for one more.

"Grab onto it!" Harry shouted. He was afraid the boy might not have understood him as soon as he opened his mouth water rushed in to clog his throat.

Whether the boy had heard him or not he desperately flung himself for the root as they swept passed it. Harry never got to see whether the kid made it or not. All he was aware of was that he was about to go spinning dizzily past the root heading towards another bend. The water was picking up becoming white and choppy and he just knew the next bend would be daggers bend.

And then something was snagging the back of his shirt and he was jerking towards the root.

The water pulled at him tugged at his body threatening to tug him right out of his shirt he fought desperately for air struggled against the current with all his might trying to reach the surface and get air.

When her burst clear of the water he had a dazed moment to see that Fred was grasping the back of his shirt. The relief was shirt lived. The water was either going to suck him right out of his shirt or pull the both of them away from the root since now Fred could only hold on with one hand.

"LET GO!" Harry shouted kicking against Fred. If there was a chance he and the boy would make it then it was better for Fred just to let him go.

Fred shook his head. "No."

There was a groaning noise and the teenager whimpered clutching tighter to the root. The groaning grew louder. It was going to break it couldn't support all three of them.

"LET GO DAMN IT LET GO!" Harry shouted and he began to desperately try to work his way out of his shirt.

**Change of View**

Ginny had transfigured a log into a medium sized wooden boat and the two of them were paddling hard down the river after the bobbing figures in the water. It was definitely three the closer they got the easier it was to tell each person apart.

Fear threatened to paralyze her as she watched her husband and brother fight against certain death as the water carried them along.

"Look they've caught a hold of something!" Draco shouted pointing down river.

Hope lit like a fire inside her as she paddled harder. As they neared she saw that Fred and the young man who must be Bill were clinging to the root of a tree on the edge of the bank . It was thick enough for the two of them to grasp but it was bending with their weight and the force and drag of the water. To her horror Harry wasn't even holding onto the root Fred was holding onto the back of his shirt and Harry was half way out of it.

"HARRY!" She shouted his name leaning over the edge of the boat reaching out for him. Draco clasped her waist pulling her back.

"He'll drag you in with him!" Draco shouted but Ginny fought against him uncaring.

"HARRY!" She screamed his name, called for him. Called for all her hopes and her dreams that were threatened to be swept away.

She leaned farther as they neared straining with all her might to reach him.

She was so very very close.

A horrible groaning sound rendered the air and Ginny felt absolute terror invade all of her senses. The Root was going to break they were all going to go swirling by to their deaths . She could grab one of them. The boy, if she was a decent person she would grab the frightened teenager. Ginny feared part of her wasn't decent for her brother and her husband were also clinging to that root for dear life.

"DRACO HURRY!" She shouted as a cracking sound ripped through the air like a gun shot. She and Draco leapt forward at the same time.

Part of her prayed Draco would grab for Fred, she prayed to every God she'd ever heard of even as she made her own choice.

She reached for Harry.

**Change of View**

Harry struggled underneath the water to get out of his shirt, he'd die but at least Fred and the boy would live. That was his only thought as he kicked and struggled. The water rushing around his ears blocking out sound and choking him as he struggled to breathe.

And then it was too late even beneath the water he could hear the cracking of the root and he was spinning out into the water again. The force of the water was so great that when something grabbed a hold of his shirt again the collar bit into his neck jerking him around. Harry gasped as he was hauled to the surface blinking away water and the harsh sunlight. He hit his head on something wooden and bit his tongue against the pain.

He was being dragged along by a boat and Ginny had both hands clasped around him. His weight and the force of the water was pulling her forward.

NO!

Harry struggled against her hold on him but she refused to let go.

"GINNY LET GO!" He shouted in vain. "I'LL ONLY DRAG YOU IN!"

She clutched onto him tighter even as her body slipped farther over the edge of the boat. " Then we'll be together at least. Wherever you go I go remember."

Beside him the frightened Teenager was clasping onto Fred's back holding on for dear life. Draco had both of Fred's arms clasped in his own and was being pulled forward slower then Ginny even though that didn't make much sense. Harry didn't have time to think of the why of it. He and his wife were about to die together and he didn't care what the novels said it wasn't romantic at all! He wanted her to live, would do anything to keep her safe.

Ginny seemed to read his mind and shook her head tears running freely down her cheeks. " I love you Harry Potter. You're done fighting alone do you hear me!"

God he loved her for that.

"GINNY LET GO!" He shouted one last time in sheer desperation

"NO!" She shouted right back her hips were begging to slide over the edge now.

"Draco the both of them are going to die you can't hold both me and the kid. Let go, help her." Fred suddenly spoke looking the man who was struggling to hold him to the boat in the eye.

"NO! HOLD ON TO THEM WE CAN DO THIS" Ginny protested slipping farther.

No they couldn't They were all going to die if they stayed like this. If Draco let go of Fred and the kid he could help Ginny haul Harry in.

NO! NO! NO! Fred and an innocent boy were not going to die in favor of him. He couldn't bear it, wouldn't bear it. If He let go Ginny could Help Draco….

"POTTER DON'T YOU DARE!" Draco yelled seeming to read Harry's intention even as he began to go lax. "EVEN WITH GINNY I CAN'T PULL THESE TWO UP"

It was true even with Ginny helping the two of them couldn't drag Fred and the kid into the boat in the end they would either all die or Ginny and Draco would be forced to let go and still the three of them would die.

The noble thing to do was to go lax anyway to die with Fred and the kid. He knew in the end Draco would let go and haul Ginny back. He and Ginny would survive.

But As Harry stared into his wife's eyes for the last time he found he could be selfish. He wanted to live. If there was nothing he could do to save the others then he wanted to live. To be with her.

He hated himself.

"Just let me go Ginny please." He begged her. He couldn't live with himself if he lived while the other two died.

The choice was taken out of his hands as Draco made a decision. He let go of one of Fred's hands nearly being dragged over the edge himself.

"NO! PLEASE DRACO DON'T! " Ginny Screamed watching as her brother and the kid nearly slipped from the one hand Draco still had on them. He gripped his wand eighthly and shouted an incantation. _"Incanshiedom_!" A bright layer of light enveloped the two flailing bodies in the water. Harry knew it was a shield it might not hold up against the rocks up ahead but it was the best Draco could do for them. "I'm sorry" Draco whispered. Then he let go.

"NO! FRED!" Ginny was screeching just as she began to slide forward into the water. Draco had moved as soon as he let go of Fred and the kid to clasp her around the waist. He managed to keep the three of them from going any farther but wasn't strong enough to haul the two of them back into the boat.

Harry was cold he was numb. The water blasting at his ears, his wife's sobs for her brother beating at him like a blunt mace.

He had failed. Failed failed failed. They couldn't remain like this forever eventually Draco would tire and either let them go or be dragged in with them. His beloved wife was going to die, he had stood at an alter and pledged his life to protect hers and he had failed.

"HOLD ON!"

He didn't know who had shouted that but no less then thirteen flashes of blue spell light hit the boat and it began to rise from the water and zoom fast towards the bank. As soon as they were air born without the water the help push him up Draco and Ginny were holding his dead weight. If he didn't grab the edges of the boat he'd drag them both out of the boat to plummet into the water.

His wife would never let him go. He loved her for that but in this moment he also hated her for it. His soul felt shattered and broken and he wanted to die.

_But you need to live. For her._

Because without even making the decision, even as his soul screamed a denial cursed him for living when an innocent had just died and his own brother had just perished. He grabbed onto the edges of the boat.

**Change of scene.**

The people on the embankment watched in fear as the boat rose out of the water directed by the wands of the thirteen Aurors that had answered the call. Molly felt cold shaken her eyes locked onto the form of her daughter unable to come to terms with what she had just seen. To watch her baby be swept away by the cruel waters of fate and to watch as the other hung suspended in the air. She could fall to the same fate any moment.

Her whole body shook, Arthurs arms tightened around her.

There were people she didn't know along with their family. A boy with a bruised looking throat stood weeping with a couple who must be his parents. Another man was holding a loudly sobbing woman who screamed for somebody named William.

Rory was in Hermione's arms weeping his face buried in her shirt and held there no mater his struggles. Shani who had flooed into their home after her father was pale and crying into her hands watching her father struggle in the boat. Frankie had slipped an arm around her forgetting his dislike of the girl to comfort her. She shuddered and turned into him.

Angelina was on her knees weeping into her hands, Taylor holding onto her as if by doing so he could keep her together. Even as sobs made his own small body shudder. Molly knew she should comfort her daughter-in-law but she feared if she moved she would break.

George had already broken. He did not cry he did not weep he did not even rage. He stood staring at the last spot he had seen his Twins head go under the water. He was so pale it looked as if he had never seen the sun, his eyes were so shuttered they appeared glazed with pain.

He stared at the spot unblinking as if the power of his gaze alone would make his twin reaper.

It never did. And it never would.

His lips slowly opened and a low keening noise that of a wounded animal high pitched and feral escaped him. Molly shuddered, she had never seen or heard a man torn into pieces but she could imagine it sounded like this. Molly pushed away from her husband reaching out to touch her son but he was crumpling to his knees now still making that horrible agonizing sound.

"Empty…it's empty…mum help me it's so empty…" he suddenly looked up at her pleading with her to fill the space his twin had always occupied.

Alicia clasped tightly to him sobbing with him, holding him tightly to her rocking him as his entire body shook with his pain.

"I'm sorry baby, I'm so sorry…" Molly ached for him she ached to take away his pain. There was a cheer and Molly turned to see that the boat and it's occupants had successfully been brought to land on the safety of the bank. There was a crush of people moving forward and Dean, Deavon and Corry who were amongst the Aurors tried vainly to keep the crowd back.

There were the Smokey flashes of camera's and reporters asking questions. One was even badgering the poor weeping woman who still cried out for her son William. Molly felt such incredible rage at their callous behavior. Her son, her little Freddie was dead and if one of those reports tuck a quill and parchment in her face she would do murder.

"PAPA" Shani was running out of Frankie's arms and hurtling into her fathers. Molly woke from her daze suddenly desperate to reach her daughter.

She shoved her way past a few ignoring the cry of pain as she thumped one of them not so gently on the head to reach her daughter. She and Harry lay sprawled on the grass. Harry was wet and shivering and she feared he had been hurt. His eyes were glassy and he lay as if dead. Ginny was clutching him to her. She looked up at her mother tears gathering in her eyes.

"I'm sorry mum. Don't hate me…I'm sorry…I'm so sorry…I just couldn't let him die…I should have grabbed Fred but Harry…I…I'm sorry mum."

And then she wept.

Molly felt the grief she had been tampering down threaten to overwhelm her. Her daughter had chosen her husband over her brother. A choice no woman should ever have to make, Ginny needed her to comfort her but Molly needed comforting herself.

_Your children, the ones you still have they need you. You have to be strong for them._

She bit her lip against their trembling, shoved away the pain and grief. Blocked out the memory of two identical curly haired imps who had come into the world to give her twice as much joy, together. She blocked away the shared birthdays and despite the endless aggravation they could cause the way they still managed to make her laugh harder then any of her other children.

They had come into the world together but they would not leave it together. She blocked away that thought and the pain it brought her.

As a medi-team pushed it's way through the crowed she gathered her broken family to her. They were broken and she knew this was only the beginning. She knew dark times were ahead, that this was something they might never recover from.

_We will, we have to. _

Whatever dark twist of fate that had suddenly cast itself against her and the family she lover. She would not let it win. They would make it through this.

A/N: Ok if I were a reader and an Author left me hanging like that I'd hunt her down. Please don't !like I warned you I thought I was leaving Monday and would be farther along in the story. I'm leaving in the morning though and I'm sorry to let it hang like this, that's a mean place to hang and again I'm sorry. Like I said my Bro's getting married in July and my mum and I are going up there now to help my Nana with planning and getting around and stuff. As of now we're coming back directly after the wedding but that could change who knows. I feel terrible leaving it like this for even a month but it can't be helped. Well I'll see you later. I hope to see lots of lovely (and more then likely irritated) comments.


	20. Chapter 20: Falling begins

_He couldn't reach it, no matter how hard he strained he couldn't reach the apple hanging like a very mocking piece of temptation just slightly above his reach. Why he needed this apple when there were so many on lower branches was not so much a mystery. Not if you knew little boys and the way their minds worked._

_This apple was the brightest and the biggest and the hardest to get, of course no other apple would do._

"_Reach George reach!" Fred pushed harder on his rear grunting and straining with the effort to boost him higher._

_He made one last straining effort for it, pushing off with his legs to gain momentum. His fingers brushed the bright red peel. It was smooth against his fingertips and with desperation he clasped his fingers into a fist._

_And then they were falling._

_The air slammed out of his lungs and for a minute all he could see were stars. He was afraid they had finally broken something as their mother had always direly warned them they would. The sharp stinging pain in his leg boded ill for escaping this latest adventure unscathed._

"_George are you ok? George?" Fred was leaning over him, the sun directly behind his head casting his face in shadow._

_No he wasn't sure at all but the grin on his brothers' face was infectious, and he really didn't like to be fussed over. If there was anyone he didn't want to worry it was Fred, not that he was sure that was possible. _

"_George your legs sticking out kind of funny" Fred's eyes were wide his voice squeaking on some of the higher notes of his panic. _

_So it was possible._

_George grinned holding up the prize that was worth this pain. The shiny red apple was speared to his fingers, its juices leaking down them in tiny streaks. Its scent seemed to be wafting on the air between them, it smelled like summer like the essence of absolute triumph and he couldn't wait to take a bite._

"_I got it. They said we couldn't do it but we did it Fred. We can do anything together." He sighed in contentment resting his head against the cool grass and closing his eyes._

"_You could have done it without me…" _

_Fred's voice was just a whisper._

_Suddenly the summer day did not seem quiet so bright and the memory not so pleasant. This is not how it had gone. Fred had laughed and they had joked about his falling and his leg until he had been laughing so hard that he had completely forgotten the pain._

On his bed George Weasley stirred.

"_Are you going to be able to go on without me? If I ever leave." Fred whispered again_

No No No

Not how it had gone at all.

George woke slowly tears already gathering on the lids of his eyes because that was exactly as it had gone.

"No"

He whispered not to the silent and empty room but to the silent space in his life that his brother had once occupied.

A space that could never be filled again, only made worse by the dreams of youth and memories of the past. He couldn't even have them anymore, they were changed now. Changed by his sorrow.

"_I don't think I can walk on my own Fred."_

"_I think you could if you just tried, George."_

"_But it hurts so much"_

He whispered the words from a conversation so long ago their meaning changed from broken bones to broken heart.

"_Then I'll carry you."_

But Fred wasn't here to do that this time.

George began to tremble with grief and slowly it turned to anger.

Because Harry had let go.


	21. Chapter 21: Lies and Hatred

"Sit down Potter." Chief Finnworth growled barely giving Cory and Devon a spare glance. His eyes were glued to Harry, his fury evident in his jerky movements and his stiff posture. Cory glanced at Harry, he looked like hell warmed over his cloths rumpled as if he had slept in them for a week. Cory frowned noticing the pallor of his skin, the bags under his eyes. She didn't doubt that he had.

Harry sank into a chair in front of his chiefs desk looking deflated and worn ragged. Cory glanced at Devon taking a cue from him and taking the seat next to Harry. They had discussed this the night before as soon as the howler had arrived at Harry's place demanding he meet with the chief first thing in the morning. Whatever happened next they were standing by him.

"You want to tell me Potter what the hell you were thinking? You want to inform me why you thought it best to take on a madman without reporting in or calling for aide?" Finnworth bit out still glaring at Harry.

When Harry didn't even look up Cory leapt to his defense. "Sir Harry did send up the call for aide. That's how the team arrived on the scene."

If they were lucky they could still get out of this as long as the chief didn't know about Fred's trying to kill Ginny.

"That's not what I was talking about Damn it! Don't play games with me Kenworth! You think I'm some sort of bloody fool?" Chief growled his tone becoming more and more menacing. Corry shivered as he leaned forward eyes hard glinting like ice. "Now I'm giving you one chance Potter. You utter one word I don't like and your ass is out of my department is that clear? Now. What. Happened."

Harry continued to stare at the desk, as if he could find some sort of answers within the pattern on the wood. Corry nudged him hard. What on earth was he playing at? This was his job on the line, not just his job but possibly time in Azkaban.

When Harry remained silent Devon spoke up.

"The deceased was showing signs of disturbia, Potter being off duty and a relation thought it best to take him to Mungo's for a Psyche Analysis. The deceased made an unexpected move leaving the home and heading for the Park. Upon Harry's arrival the deceased snapped attacking the two muggle boys. Potter in order to save the boys life engaged Weasley, when he went in the water Potter sent up the call and acting more as a relative then an Auror jumped in to save Weasley. Unorthodox but according to protocol sir."

The silence in the room was heavy as the Chiefs eyes bored into them each in turn. It was a bald faced lie. Fred had not just shown signs of madness he had full out tried to murder two people. Protocol would have been to turn him in then. Harry had ignored protocol and broken a few laws in the process. It had cost two people their lives and if word got out it would destroy their department and Harry's career. Not to mention his life, things weren't pretty in Azkaban.

Chiefs eyes centered on Harry. "Is that how it happened Potter? I have it from an anonymous tip that things didn't quite happen that way. Thing is though that I happen to think this department doesn't deserve to sink for your stupidity. So if that's how it happened, you say the word and that's how it happened."

Corry and Devon both watched Harry with nervous anticipation.

_Just say yes! Hell just nod Harry don't screw this up, _ She pleaded sending a prayer heavenward.

"Potter I'm waiting! I'm waiting for you to tell me that the death of a teenage boy and your own Brother-in-law was a tragic accident and not a result of you breaking every rule this department has! Can you assure me of that Potter?" Chief snapped growing impatient with Harry's silence.

Harry's eyes slowly raised until they met the chiefs.

"Who told you?" His voice was whisper soft.

"It was anonymous, Potter." Chief grumbled his eyes shifting a little.

_Lie._

Harry blinked at the chief not saying anything more.

"Potter you are one step away from being fired answer me!" Chief snapped loosing his patience.

Corry held her breath as Harry seemed to struggle to make the words come out.

"Just tell the chief that's how it happened Harry." Devon encouraged softly gripping Harry's arm tightly. Harry glanced down at it, as if he had never seen such a thing in all his life. Harry turned his eyes back to the chief and shook his head.

"No Chief. I can't assure you it wasn't my fault."

Devon groaned throwing Harry's arm away in disgust. Corry tried desperately to salvage the situation as the Chiefs face began to grow red with fury.

"Harry natural feels guilty for not being able to save them. You followed Protocol Harry there was nothing more you could…"

Harry slammed his fist down on the wood so hard a crack appeared in the surface. Corry sucked in a breath biting her bottom lip to keep from trembling. Harry seemed unconcerned with the sudden swelling in his pinky.

"DON'T LIE FOR ME!"

There was absolute silence.

Then the chief reached for his wand.

"Chief if you call for them to arrest Harry the media is going to destroy this entire department." Devon warned him.

"You think I don't Bloody know that? Damn you to hell Potter!" Chief cursed gripping his wand tighter.

Harry laughed bitterly. "I'm going chief, don't worry about that."

"I can't bloody well let you off, if they found out I'd sink with you!" chief grunted.

"If Harry goes this department goes whether you aide him or not. Chief he's been your best for years he messed up but…" Corry began to defend him.

"MESSED UP! HE COST A KID HIS LIFE!" Chief thundered.

"Look at it like this chief. Harry is grieving, he doesn't have any sense of what he's saying. Obviously, he just broke his pinky on a desk and didn't even flinch. You asked him for a report and like we said he followed protocol. As far as you go if Potter is found to have lied to you that's hardly your fault. Meanwhile since Harry is obviously emotionally unstable, understandably of course, send him on a very long medical leave until this all blows over." Devon suggested.

Finnworth pondered it for a moment glancing from Harry to Devon then skyward. "It only works if Potter keeps his mouth shut." He grumbled.

"We'll take care of Harry" Devon assured him

The chief grunted. "He'll need to give an official press conference. The Daily Prophet will want an official statement. Potter I want your name all over this, if it ever comes out it'll be you and only you who takes the fall then."

"Done sir." Devon assured him.

As Devon yanked Harry to standing and the three of them moved for the door Chief called them back.

"For this to work you'll need to keep everyone who knows quiet." he warned them.

Corry shook her head. "The Weasleys wouldn't do anything that would harm Harry."

The chief snorted, "Tell that to my informant."

Change of scene

Fred had died, an innocent boy had died.

It was his fault yet Corry and Devon had risked their jobs for him.

"What the Hell is wrong with you Harry?" Devon demanded as soon as they had left the chiefs office.

Harry ignored him, ignored the whispers surrounding him as he marched past. He was driven by the strongest urge to flee. On the edges of his vision the shadows gathered the tortured memories of his mind threatened to overwhelm him with guilt and pressing darkness.

"Look at me Potter!" Devon demanded grabbing for his arm.

Harry didn't even think he turned and swung at him. He was on one level aware that there was stinging pain in his knuckles, that something bad had happened to the structure in his bones. But it was barely something to take note of.

He heard Corry shouting at him, but he was past caring.

Devon had let out a grunt of pain blood pouring from a nose that was now funnily out of line. He swung back. "You could have put me and Corry in Azkaban! You STUPID STUPID FOOL!"

He knew it. Just one more chain to the shackles awaiting him in hell.

He welcomed the pain from Devon's fist. He was furious, he needed to destroy something.

_Destroy it the truth will eventually come out and they will go down with you. Friendship with you has only every brought the ones you love suffering. Destroy it._

"I DIDN'T ASK FOR YOU TO LIE FOR ME!" He screamed tearing into Devon as hard as he could feeling Corry's hands grappling at his back. He thrust an arm back pushing her harshly away.

"DON'T TOUCH MY WIFE POTTER!" Devon screeched in affront laying into Harry with more force.

Harry lay panting on the floor unable to swing at him anymore. His hands throbbed in excruciating pain. Had he broken every bone in them? Devon stood panting over him blood running down his face into his mouth.

"I'm turning myself in Dev." Harry sighed all his anger leaking from his body. He was so incredibly tired of it all. He welcomed a few years rotting in Azkaban.

Devon let out a noise of utter disgust. "You are the biggest fool that ever lived Harry. You have a family to support and you're going to roll over like a kicked dog! You're a coward Potter! A coward! You made a choice and yeah it turned out rotten. But it was Fred who killed that kid, Fred who fucking blew his gourd not you! All you did was try and give him a chance."

He let out a frustrated sigh swiping his face to clear it from blood with the back of his hand. "You know what I don't get Potter? If you knew you couldn't fight why the hell did you marry her? If you can't fight to keep what's yours then you don't bloody deserve it. We're done Potter, if you want to roll in dung roll in it by yourself."

"Devon please…" Corry touched his arm.

Devon spit blood from his mouth glaring at Harry. Then he looked to his wife "You do whatever you think you have to do I won't stop you. I wash my hands of this entire mess. " He turned. And then he was gone.

Change of Scene

"Not home yet is he?"

Ginny turned from the window where she was watching for Harry's return. George was leaning on the doorframe of the kitchen looking nonchalant but underneath the poise she could see a line of tension running through his body.

She shook her head. George had been silent and Moody since Fred's death three days before. He barely spoke anymore, laughter was a distant dream. Around Harry he was the worst. He was frosty, his attitude like ice barely able to hide his scorn of her husband.

"What will you do now that he's been fired?" George asked watching her in contemplation.

Ginny stiffened. It would destroy Harry to loose his job, he had worked long and hard for it so many years. Becoming an auror had pulled him from the darkest moments in his life.

"We don't know that they have. They wouldn't Harry is their best." She reassured herself more then George.

"Please, he broke the law." George snorted.

They didn't know that though. Corry and Devon would cover for him, she knew it better then she knew herself.

"Corry and Devon are with him." She spoke still watching for his return.

"Oh yes. And they'd gladly lie for him wouldn't they." George sneered.

Ginny bristled turning to him. Did he _want _Harry to go to Azkaban? "Of course, they love him. This wasn't Harry's fault."

"Oh of course not all his fault. We both know that don't we Ginny. Harry may of started it all but in the end we both know you could have grabbed for Fred." His voice was soft completely non threatening but the look in his eyes…

Ginny shivered.

It was condemning.

"You're berating me for choosing my husband over my brother? Do you have any idea what that choice felt like?" She demanded advancing on him.

_He's right thou…._

_You could have…_

_Harry's not to blame you are!_

"I don't. But I would have chosen him. You should have chosen him. It doesn't really matter though does it. You still have your husband, even if he'll rott in Azkaban you'll still have Harry. You got exactly what you wanted, you should be Happy Ginny. Your happiness is all that matters when it comes down to it right?"

His sneer cut her to the core. Better then any knife could.

He left her there shaking watching the window desperately for Harry to come home.


	22. Chapter 22: Unraveled

-1Although Harry knew Ginny would be waiting anxiously for him to return home Harry did not make his way to the Weasley home. It started with a walk, he just felt the urge to walk to wander as far as his feet would take him. He did not feel them begin to ache did not notice the stinging in his hands the last protest before they mellowed into an almost pleasant numbness. His feet carried him to the spot that so occupied his mind, the spot where he had last seen Fred's head disappear beneath the waves.

It had started with him sitting on the dock, staring into the swirling waters.

Change of scene

Draco was frustrated, he couldn't reveal his secrete, what he knew to be so terribly true without putting his own life and his daughters life in danger. He didn't really know why he was trying to save Potter. It wasn't out of any caring for the other man, he didn't even particularly like Harry. He did feel as if he understood his long time adversary better as a man even had a measure of sympathy for him. However that was as far as he was willing to budge on the matter of Harry.

He neither liked nor respected the way he chose to live his life, a being driven by hatred and self pity forgetting the things he held closest to them. Essentially letting them slip through his gutless fingers. Draco might have made a few mistakes in his life but at least he knew how to fight for the things he loved. True fighting for that which he loved had caused him more hurt then actually gain most his life but that was the price one paid when they put their love and trust in the wrong person.

He doubted however that Ginny and Rory would prove as twisted and unloving as his father had proved, therefore Harry had nothing to loose and everything to gain by holding onto them until the last breath was torn from his body. Perhaps that's why he was trying so desperately to help Potter out of the mess he always seemed to make of his life. He knew what it was like to be a little boy starved for love. He knew what it was like to wait and watch at windows like he had just found Ginny.

It was the wee hours of the morning and here she still stood a blanket wrapped tightly around her, forced upon her by her concerned mother. She waited like a statue at the window her body trembling, her hands gripped tightly. The fact that Harry hadn't come home was daunting, and troublesome. Draco, as the minutes ticked by began to fear that Potter would do something stupid.

In fact he was certain the fool would. It seemed a trend with Harry.

"I suppose you despise me too Draco?"

Ginny spoke so suddenly, she had been so still for so long that when she did speak it caused Draco to start. Her eyes focused on his, they were brittle looking. As if they where made of glass and were on the verge of shattering into a million pieces of jagged despair.

Why did Ginny even care what he thought? Looking at her Draco began to suspect it wasn't really him singularly whom she spoke to. She was speaking her greatest fears aloud daring him to condemn her as her brother had.

"I don't know what it is I'm supposed to have done. He's my brother and I loved him more then I can say. Harry's my husband, the father of my children. I promised to love him till death did us part, to stand by him in sickness and in health. If I could hold him to this world for one moment longer I had to do it. It wasn't about my happiness. Having him alive and my brother dead isn't on my scale of things that bring me joy." She laughed bitterly clutching her blanket tighter. Her knuckles had turned white.

"It had nothing to do with my personal happiness. It had everything to do with catching a fleeting glimpse of a haunted face in the window of a train. It was taking him to a place I couldn't follow and all I could do was stand on the platform watching him disappear and hoping for the best. Do you know I went home that night and sat on my bed and thought of him?" Her fingers started to relax her gaze turning soft.

"I kept seeing his face, so confused and in lost until mum directed him. The childish wonder, and beneath the layers a kind of sadness I had never seen before. It kept me rooted to that platform. Though my body moved about, growing and experiencing life my heart has stood rooted to the platform waiting for him to come rolling back in. I've thought of giving up, I've thought of walking away, I even tried it. But he always finds a way to keep me right there waiting. Ears pricked for the whistle of the train returning him to me. It was about that Draco, it was about honoring my part of our vows because if he ever rolls back into the station I have to be there waiting for him. Nobody else ever has."

She sighed turning back to the window.

Damn Potter for a fool twice and twice more. Draco thought as he marched from the house in search of Potter. Ginny Weasley had waited her entire childhood for him, Ginny Potter still waited except this time with company. For in the window above the kitchen was the face of a silent little boy. Waiting just as patiently as his mother, the late hour finally forcing him into a fret filled sleep his hands still pressed against the glass his head resting on the frame.

Change of Scene

He wanted to scream. He wanted a strong drink, to drown away the constant pain that was his life. He had built up so many dreams just to watch them crumble around him as if they had meant nothing to him at all. Every misadventure of his life had lead him to this point, to this wasted life. He sank to his knees staring at the swirling waters.

Searching for some sort of hope.

_What have I done? I've ruined everything. Devon was right, I never should have married her. I had no business building up her hopes for something I could never give her._

He already knew there was none. He leaned closer to the waters edge.

Change of Scene

Where would Potter go? Draco wondered. He couldn't shake the sense that he had to reach Harry, and reach him fast. Every muscle in his body was tensing, reading for some sort of dire event that he couldn't name.

Potter would be heaping all sorts of guilt on himself, the guilt of killing one's own Brother-in-law might be just too much for him to handle. He had to find him, and he had to find him now. But where?

The guilt of killing ones…

And then he knew.

_Governors Park._

Change of scene

My God how it hurt….

He couldn't breath, the pain was rising inside him like a wave. Not just the pain of Fred's death but the pain of so many others. Deaths he had never really healed from. Deaths he had been forced to put his grief aside for, forced to solider on in the quest to save a world that had only ever shown him flightily loyalty and false caring.

Was he now too lost to be saved?

He wanted some sense of hope, some sense of salvation but he'd been lost for so long he now no longer knew what to search for. He was dieing from the inside out, had in fact been doing so since his youth. How had he never seen it?

How had he not recognized the agonized screaming of his soul, how had he ignored the final knife into his heart, that ever present engulfing need to die?

He wanted a cold and empty grave. Deserved nothing better.

Wanted to drown…not in the liquors of his path but in cold unforgiving water just as the world had always been cold and unforgiving. Just as his heart had become.

He'd tried so hard to kill the pain, had married Ginny because she gave him peace and Joy. He'd only brought more pain to his life, and now had tainted hers.

And that was the final link in the chain waiting to shackle him in his own personal hell.

"WHY? WHY ME?"

The ravaged cry exploded from him, erupted from his core a final question for life. He waited for a moment, as if the clouds would open with some sort of answer.

_I want to die…_

_It would be so much better if I did_

_Just let go of the edge, lean forward and let go…_

_You'll finally be at peace, Sirius will be there, Your parents Dumbledore…_

Except he didn't believe that either. None of them waited for him in hell. He let out a bitter laugh, no happiness even in death it seemed.

He took a deep breath, at least Ginny would have a measure of peace, and let go of the planks of the dock.

He felt himself dip forward….

And then was jerked roughly back.

Change of Scene

He didn't know why his heart was beating so fast in his chest at the sight of Potter leaning towards the swirling waters of Hide River. Potters death, if he took his own life would appease his father, and would leave Draco blameless.

For one horrible moment he hesitated.

And then he remembered Ginny standing in the window.

He ran forward just as Harry let go of the edge and began to slide towards the water. He lunged for him, grabbing a hold of his collar and jerking him harshly back.

"DAMN IT POTTER!" He wasn't much of a curser but there seemed to be a lot of that going around these days where Harry was concerned. His heart slamming in his chest was actually painful. His breath was coming in his pants, his nerves strung so tight he was shaking.

"I'VE HAD ENOUGH! YOU WANT TO DIE? FINE I'LL STRANGLE YOU MYSELF BUT YOU'RE GOING TO GO BACK TO YOUR WIFE AND FACE HER LIKE A MAN FIRST!" He knew he was yelling himself hoarse but he couldn't help it. Harry was just laying there.

Draco grabbed his shirt shaking him hard. "I'M SICK OF IT POTTER. ALL YOUR WHINING MAKES ME SICK. SO YOUR LIFE'S BEEN UNFAIR? SO SOME PEOPLE HAVE DIED, YOU HAVEN'T DIED! YOU'VE THROWN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE AWAY BUT I WON'T LET YOU THROW AWAY HERS."

Did he have any idea how lucky he was? He had loved his wife, his family with everything in him but his wife had loved friends and money more. To have a woman's whole devotion, Draco would kill for that. To be a hero in his Childs eyes, as clearly Harry was to Rory instead of a constant reminder of why she was constantly shunned an in pain. To come home with her smiling at him, as Rory smiled up at his father. To have a woman waiting for him with so much love and fierce determination as Ginny showed. He would sell his soul for such a thing and Harry was willing to give it all up.

"Damn it go ahead and die Potter, you don't deserve her. Choke on your own misery, and I'll do my best to comfort her. She deserves someone to fight for her, if you wont then I will." He said in utter disgust casting Harry away from him. He clamored to his feet with every intention of doing just that.

Change of view

Harry endured Draco trying to shake his brains loose only half able to understand his words due to the rattling in his head.

_Go back to your wife…people have died _YOU _haven't died…won't let you throw away hers…_

Don't throw away hers…

Wasn't it about protecting her?

Wasn't it always about loving her more then himself? That's why he had to…

_Sitting at the Weasley kitchen table hearing rapid footsteps and watching her come skidding into the room. She was simply dressed, she was young and carefree. Until she turned and spotted him. Her face went pale and she fled from the room a rosy blush heating her cheeks. Odd but cute._

_She was awkward shy, and had a rather painful crush on him. She was just Ron's little sister but she obviously meant a lot to him…_

_She was in trouble.…She didn't deserve to die…she was so innocent. He would protect her with his life, try his hardest to save her. _

_His arm throbbed from where the fang had sunk deep spreading it's poison. His vision was blurring as Phox circled above them. She was pale she was…_

_Brave in this moment, not hysterical as any girl her age had a right to be. She was concerned for him…_

_She was a constant source of commitment, of friendship and stability. She was Ron's little sister and therefore not a part of the inner circle of fourth year Gryffindors but she was still there her presence as necessary as a place to sit but just as overlooked…_

_She was Ron's little sister but she was striking in her dress Robes. For just a moment before his eyes slid to Cho and Cedric dancing he took a moment to think on how fast time was passing. Ginny was growing up._

_Still just a little sister._

_Stirring stirring so many things were stirring in his life. The anger was relentless, the fear the disappointment. The mounting dread at Voldemorts return. The distrust and anger of a man he had always trusted. They all called him liar, he stood against the world. Ron and Hermione tried to help but they did not understand what it was like to fear Voldemort invading your mind taking over your emotions shaping you to be used as a tool._

"_Harry did it ever occur to you, you're not the only one who would know what it feels like to have Voldemort Possess you?" _

_He blinked at her in shock. He had forgotten…_

_He could talk to her, she alone might understand the feeling of invasion…_

_She was smart…._

_She was there._

_She cared._

_She had a boyfriend._

_Stirring so many different stirrings. Grief and pain he had lost yet another loved one. He had to go on. He had to finish it out, there would be time to grieve for Sirius later…he feared to examine his grief too closely…._

_It had been his fault…_

_Better to steel his resolve and do what had to be done. _

_Awakenings so many awakenings. Awake to new knowledge, new discovers. New conflicts, new professors. New assignments form Dumbledore, new private lessons. New surge of feeling. It wasn't just stirrings anymore it was a hurricane of need and want unlike anything he had ever felt._

_She knew him. Understood him. She was sturdy, she was resilient…_

_She was utterly unmistakably beautiful and she was unmistakably taken._

_He was absolutely furious, a beast caged in his own skin wishing to break free and mark his territory to claim what was his. To hold close to him what he desired much._

_He felt Torn, He felt ravenous, he felt need… he felt indecision… he felt…_

_Lucky._

_She wanted him too. It hadn't taken more then a few words._

_Harry we won._

_And they had won. As he wrapped her in his arms and claimed what was so very his and what he had needed longer then he could comprehend his world had fallen into place and he had indeed won._

Draco wasn't shaking him anymore. As the memories, all his reasons for loving all his reasons for living seem to shake loose from the cage of darkness surrounding them Draco's last words sank in.

He had come incredibly close to loosing her all over again, and once again at his own hand. Hadn't he learned the first time? Yes he'd won her that day, she'd been his ever since but the world was trying it's hardest to yank her away from him. In hopes of watching him crumble. And instead of holding tighter and fighting for all he was worth he had nearly flung her into their clutches.

If he could make her dance with joy tonight he would do it. He wasn't going to be the cause of anymore of her pain. He was such a complete and utter fool.

He was loosing her.

Draco was marching away from him.

_Watching her kiss Dean Harry felt his inner beast…_

He shook away the memory. No one, not Draco, not Voldemort not memories not even his own damned stupid self was keeping him from his wife and his son.

Enough was enough.

Harry surged to his feet. He grabbed Malfoys shoulder yanking him around.

"Don't touch my wife Malfoy!"

Draco whirled around swinging from his head in obvious frustration. "You don't even want her!"

Absolutely not true. He wanted, _needed _her more then his next breath.

"That's where you're wrong Malfoy. But you've been right about everything else." Harry spoke a sudden need to see her to touch her filling him like a rising tide.

Besides It wasn't Draco he needed to fight. He refused to spend one more moment away from her. If they were going to survive this he had to trust in her, to both depend on and shelter her. No more lies, no more secrets. His life was hers and he needed more then anything to renew that bond. It had grown tattered and strained these last few months. Cast away and gathering dust in the corners of his heart.

Enough.

He turned and strode quickly away from Draco, breaking into a fast stride then a flat out run not bothering to explain his sudden departure.

Draco stood watching Harry sprint away. He had never really meant to take Ginny for his own, he knew she loved one and only one. Still part of him yearned.

He had Shani, she was more then enough woman in his life and he could be content.

He watched Harry finally remember he didn't have to walk and then disappear with a Pop. Draco shook his head.

"That is the latest train I have ever seen in my life."

Change of scene

Harry was still running as he appeared in the front hall of the Burrow, he skid a little off balance. He remained standing and once he'd righted himself he hurriedly walked into the living room headed for the stairs. This late Ginny would be in bed…

He was so eager to reach her he almost didn't hear her voice.

"Harry is that you? Where have you been?"

He whipped around. There she stood in the kitchen doorway. She hadn't even dressed for bed. Had she been watching at the window?

Yes. He knew her better then he knew himself. She had waited for him.

A wave of tears threatened to overwhelm him. How could he say all that he meant to say?

Impossible…

There was no words for this release. For this freedom. For the sudden realization that he was lost without and anchor and his only chance for survival was to tie himself to her.

No words to express how he saw her, how treasured she was. Love was weak, pale and insufficient.

It was all he had.

She ran to him, something in his eyes drawing her like a moth to flame. She trembled against him holding him tightly to her heart. She gazed up at him her eyes swimming, searching for something within his own.

A tiny oh of wonder formed on her lips.

"Harry?" It was a question, a plea.

The kiss started out gentle. It was a coming home, it was all that was tender and hopeful. He tasted her joy, he shared his own pouring his own exalted emotions into the kiss. His fingers feathered her cheek in reverence to the greatest gift he had ever been given. The thing in his life that had been meant to make it worth all the pain.

His lips moved over hers capturing their sweetness, begging for her passion the heat and strength of her desire for him and him alone. His hands sought the silkiness of her hair. Tangling in it's length drawing forth every memory of passion once shared and left to cool.

He couldn't contain his own. He needed to show her what he could not express in words. What could only be expressed in an action as old as time itself. His work would never be done, for he could never kiss her enough to convey it all.

He carried her up the stairs unable to break her gaze. He felt like a new born, like life was suddenly just beginning. She had come into his life and breathed true life into it. She was his dreams come true, his hope, the only one there would ever be for him. And he loved her. Such a simple word love, yet it seemed written all over her face. It was rooted deeply in his heart and mirrored in her eyes as he laid her on their bed.

"Welcome home Harry." She sighed softly a brilliant smile gracing beautiful perfect lips holding a heaven he had to be a part of, couldn't stand a second longer being separated from.

When she kissed him like this she undid him, and for the first time in his life Harry Potter completely enjoyed being unraveled.


	23. Chapter 23: Papa

The sun was just beginning to rise high in the sky, shining through the open window casting the bed she lay in with golden light. One finger was playing with a strand of her hair as he watched her watching him. His smile was soft if tremulous, as he bent and kissed the hallow of her throat.

She shivered, to love someone as completely as she loved Harry was an emotion to strong to hold inside, and far too explosive to be resisted. The love for certain of her life, but it was time for truth between them. So she asked again.

"Harry what happened to you the night you fought Voldemort?"

He sighed, the sound so sad it did not belong in this room bathed in sunbeams and echoing the cries of their passion and their love. She held him closer, her skin to his skin. Her heart beating in time to his, guiding it to a steady pace. He whispered kisses across her throat and her breast bone his hand reaching to intertwine with hers.

"I'd been fighting him so long. For months I was on my own in over my head and so completely frightened of what would happen when I finally faced him. I didn't want you to die. I knew the chances of me surviving were slim to none and if I let any of you come with me you would die." He began softly his thumb tracing circles in her palm.

She could tell the recollection was already paining him, this was something he had to face. To be free of the hold these memories had on him he needed to face them once and for all.

"Voldemort was through playing games when I destroyed the last Horcrux. He wanted my death but he no longer wanted it to be quick or merely and example. He wanted to utterly break me…he….", he couldn't continue the corners of his vision had gone dark as his mind sought to suck him back deep into the void, the darkness of his memories.

He felt Ginny grip his hand tightly, felt her clasp him tightly in her arms the feel of her soft and warm against his skin. "I have you Harry. You're here with me, not with them. They can't hurt you anymore."

Surely his wife was beloved above all things.

He felt his body cease it's quaking and ease into small trembles.

His hands ghosted over her brow marveling, clinging to the softness he felt. He took in her scent, it calmed and soothed him. She was simply beloved, simply his and simply there. The very best of him.

"You are the love for certain of my life Ginny, and I'm not going anywhere. He tried to break me and he nearly succeeded. He didn't you know, I still had the strength to kill him. To survive, I realize now it was because of you. Beyond the pain, beyond the terror I knew you were still waiting for me. That was enough to give me the strength I needed. The pain was so terrible the memories so overwhelming I was afraid to taint you with them. I didn't want that ugliness to touch you so I told myself I could never have you. Without you I had no strength, nothing. In the end I did a better job of breaking myself then Voldemort ever did."

This time there was no gathering darkness, no trap waiting to spring. He knew he would carry the memories forever but they seemed distant now. Nothing more then a nightmare past.

"I was never more thankful then the day you said yes to marrying me do you know that Ginny?" he asked her softly a smile coming to his lips.

Ginny smiled back resting her head on his shoulder. "I know, sometimes I'll forget it but I'm counting on you to always remind me."

He chuckled softly his head bending to capture her lips with his. As his lips moved over hers, his hands stroking softly against her skin with reverent touches that made Ginny want to weep with happiness.

With every breath she took, with each passing moment where his body moved against hers, she knew she had finally won.

He was finally _all _hers, she knew. She knew in the back of her mind that it couldn't be this simple that there would be some unknown enemy to face and that the time was near. But it no longer had a hold on her husband, Ginny held him now and he was never more happier to be held.

Her thoughts scattered a moment later when she heard her name on his lips like a sigh. His lips traced a heated path down her throat and below and thinking became almost impossible. So impossible it was too much for her frazzled sense to register the sound of scampering footsteps and the creaking of a door and what it had to mean.

"PAPA!"

One moment Rory was sticking his head tentatively around the door, in search of his mother. A second later spotting his father, he shot forward like a bullet hurtling himself onto the bed.

Harry moved to scoop him up and hold him tightly.

"Papa you're back. I knew you would come back, I knew it. Don't go away anymore. ok?" His green eyes were beseeching as he sought to squeeze the breath from Harry's chest.

"Hey, didn't I tell you wherever I go, I'll always come back for you?" Harry reassured him. He ran his hand through the mop of silken curls his heart filling to the brim with pride and love for a being so small it hardly seemed worth the amount.

Rory nodded and Ginny smiled tenderly at him. "Where's my good morning kiss?" She asked playfully.

Rory eagerly, but unwilling to leave Harry's embrace, leaned over to place a smacking kiss on his mothers cheek. His small brow furrowed in sudden confusion. "Mummy?"

"Yes darling?" Ginny asked so incredibly content with her life at the moment she felt ready to face any question.

"Why don't you and papa have cloths on?"

**Change of scene**

He stirred and stirred but the water would not turn red. Potter stood with his wife, smiling at his side holding one of the spawn he called children while another one of them hugged his knees. The scene was disgusting in it's

Lucius boiled with rage.

His revenge had been so close so incredibly close.

HOW!

How had Potter broken his hold on him?

_That scum you call a son would know. He is forever running to the Potters. He was helping him…the nasty little blood traitor._

If Draco had cost him his revenge….

Madness…sheer utter madness sang in his blood as he headed for his sons home.

**Change of scene**

Draco sat watching Shani play with a smile on his face. Although too old strictly to play with Dolls she still liked to rearrange the dolls he had given her over the years. She claimed that seeing them in the same outfits got boring and every now and then gave in to the temptation to change them.

He knew within the year even that last glimmer of childhood would fade. His daughter had was blooming right before his eyes. She was a young woman.

Soon there would be boys, soon there would be cloths and jewelry. He had done his best to teach her that although popularity, swains, and money were all well in good they were not the truest or best gifts in life. They were not all important, perhaps even barely important.

He enjoyed this last moment. The last moment of watching her smile fondly at a world of imaginary, where everything was simple and right and wrong was black and white. Was it her age, he couldn't shake the sense that the clock was ticking and he was running quiet simply out of time.

"Dad?" She was asking him worriedly.

"Yes Shani?" He answered shaking himself from such morbid thoughts.

"You looked so sad all of a sudden…are you ok?" She asked putting her doll down. She got up and glided toward him her morning slippers still on her feet. He smiled as she approached, she was his sunshine, his purpose. His truest and deepest love.

"You're growing up. I want what's best for you, Shani. When Fred Weasley died I got to thinking. Life is so short, we never know what could happen." It was a lot to burden a child with but Shani had seen death. She knew it's sting better then anyone. One minute she had a mother and little brother the next they had been taken from her.

He had to stop Lucius, helping Harry was not enough, the more he thought on it he knew Lucius would not tolerate his little games with Harry being tampered with. He would be forced to strike in the open. He had to warn Harry and that meant there would be some sort of fight. The future was uncertain, in confessing to Harry he would have to admit he had sheltered Lucius from the law. That had left Shani's future uncertain.

No longer, it was time to put childhood enmity aside. Looking into the eyes of his lovely daughter, loving her more then he had ever loved his pride he had done the unthinkable.

"Dad don't talk like that, unless you decide to go swimming in Hide river you aren't going to drown like Fred did you…" Shani began her eyes going wide unwilling to even face the subject.

He place a comforting hand on her shoulder, rubbing soothing circles. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"I Don't want to go live with Bellatrix, she's crazy. Papa I want to stay with you. Don't die Papa don't leave me like…" She had thrown herself around his knees so suddenly Draco flinched in shock. She was trembling against him, her usual calm and poise deserting her as she cried muffling her tears in his knees.

Hearing her cry never failed to break his heart. He scooped her up in his arms rocking her, as he held her close to him.

"You will never have to. You have new guardians now I made sure of it." he reassured as best he could one of her fears. She shook harder against him, her hold tightening.

"I don't care, you're going to do something dangerous aren't you. Don't Papa please…papa I'm scared…I"

He placed a finger to her trembling lips, feeling a sting gathering in his own eyes.

"Shani, sometimes even when it scares the hell out of you, you have to do the right thing. Even if the cost seems too high to pay remember that above all else. I love you more then anything but I have to do the right thing. I didn't before and the price was higher then anything I would have lost had I done it in the first place." He set her down bending to look her directly in the eye as she stared at him sorrowfully.

"This is a little premature. No matter what happens, I'll come back to you. You shouldn't worry." As he spoke her eyes were widening, she shook her head softly as she stared at something behind him in horror. Draco stiffened and whirled around to face the maddening glint in his fathers eyes.

"So it's true…you were helping Potter? Thinking of warning him are you Draco?" Lucius hissed.

Draco's heart pounded in his chest, but his only thought then was for his daughter. He moved her behind him willing to shield her with his very life no matter what Lucius had planned for them.

A/N: Well I have enjoyed writing this story a lot, **This is not the last chapter** but the next one will be. I just want to thank all of those who have reviewed and waited so patiently for updates. This was a terrible place to cliff you but since I only have one more chapter and an Epilogue left this was the best stopping point. Well off to start mapping out the last chapter, I've had the Epilogue in my brain since the beginning so sadly the ending is not subject to change at the moment but who knows. See you in a new moon.


	24. Chapter 24: Treasure

Gripping a letter in her hand, Molly watched her daughter and two newest grandbabies in a feeling that was a mixture of sadness and tenderness. The death of one of her own children was still so near to the surface, the wound still so very raw. She was determined to keep her family together, so she buried the pain for a later day. A day when they were free of the threatening storm around them.

Harry and Ginny had enough opposition from the rest of the world, George included, they didn't need any from her. Still as she watched five of them, Rory sitting on his mothers lap playing with Lionel's tufts of red hair, Harry holding a gurgling Joyce who was watching him with bright happy eyes, sitting in the living room enjoying being a united family. She couldn't help but remember when her own family had been united, when laughter filled the house.

It wasn't all gone. Despite the sadness in her own grieving heart their was still laughter. Rory was giggling as Lionel chuckled and tried to grasp the fingers playing with his hair. Ginny held them both very closely a glow of love and affection making her more beautiful to her own mother.

Across the room their eyes met, mother to mother yet also mother to daughter in complete understanding. Ginny's eyes softened even more the unmistakable message clear. Ginny understood her pain, also her reasons for hiding it.

"Papa is Shani ever going to come back"? Rory asked looking up at his father. Although Shani had more then worked off her debt to Frankie after Fred's death she had continued to visit the house with her father. Rory seemed to really liked the other little girl, even though she wasn't quite so little. Thirteen, even newly, was a rough age. Molly was surprised at the tenderness the girl had in reserve for a hurting little boy.

Harry hesitated, perhaps because he was unsure. Molly knew it had been Draco who talked to Harry just before he came back to his senses but she didn't know how the two men stood. If they still stood as enemies it was unlikely Shani would be returning.

"I don't know Rory, that's up to her Dad I suppose." Harry answered honestly. Seeing her opening Molly stepped forward.

"Perhaps this will shed some light." She handed Harry the letter, "It came by owl early this morning its from Draco."

Harry frowned at the letter looking slightly apprehensive, more then a little unwilling to take it. Really it was all such nonsense to Molly. She sighed perhaps the wounds the two of them had inflicted upon each other in their youth were just too deep for them to repair. At least they weren't still at each others throats, that was always a plus.

(change of Scene)

Harry left Ginny and the children with Molly the letter held tightly in his hands. What on earth did Draco have to say to him? He sure didn't have anything to say to him. Well perhaps a thank you was in order, after all if Draco hadn't shown up in the nick of time last night he'd be dead or worse right now.

Harry sighed the parchment suddenly feeling heavy in his hands. What was it about Draco that he didn't like? The lines were all blurred now, so lost in the grey he had no idea where to step anymore. Well perhaps Draco's longing for his wife was cause for strife. Draco had been serious despite his assurances otherwise. Point of fact was that if Harry hadn't snapped out of it Draco would have been more then happy to see if Ginny could love him the way she loved Harry.

Yeah, he definitely hated the man. Although fairly speaking if Harry had been such a fool as to give Ginny up in his heart of hearts he wouldn't of begrudged her any happiness she found elsewhere. He grit his teeth. Even with Draco.

So what was Draco writing about? Draco didn't like or respect him, helped him more for the innocent people he loved then for Harry. He didn't particularly care if he ever saw Harry again after this, he had in fact said all he needed to say by the river. So what was this?

Deciding there was no use speculating when he could be reading he opened the letter.

_Harry,_

_Although it is true that I have hated you for more years then I can count and that the feeling is more then likely mutual; I find myself having to face a fear I had never hoped to face. Before I tell you my story you have to promise me one thing. My daughter is the one thing in my life I have managed to do right. This letter is neither about excusing my actions, for they have no excuse and no one really cares for my reasons. Life can leave us in a split second, and she is my reason for holding on. It would be wrong of me to leave her life to chance. My only living relatives are mad people leaving me little choice in guardians. I need a family that will teach her something about love and honor as crazy as that might sound, I instantly thought of you. _

_I have never been perfect Harry, I have done things I will regret the rest of my life. I simply ask that you forget the wrong that I have done, and help me to make her life something worth living. Don't resent me so much that you would place her at risk. _

_The fact is Harry that shortly after Voldemorts defeat when the Ministry first started rounding up death eaters and my wife and I lost everything; my wife's faith and love for me vanished along with her sanity. Over time she became hostile and rabid hurting Shani and our baby boy when I could not be home to protect them. When she finally lost all control she wrote me a letter condemning me for my actions and the loss of everything she held to be important to life. Without her wealth she was nothing, had nothing not even a soul. Only someone without one could brew a poison for herself and her children. I had taken Shani to work with me, fearing the bruises I was finding on her. She had packed a lunch for both of us. Shani only ate a bite of hers before something distracted her. I ate my entire lunch and didn't suffer a thing. Shani got terribly sick and I knew something was incredibly wrong. She's my angel Harry, I know you have plenty of your own so you can understand this feeling. I don't know if you're listening but I'm begging you for mercy, you know what it is to love something that much too._

_After we gave her a potion to rid her of the small amount of toxins in her body we discovered the poison in her food. I flew home with her in a rage only to find my wife and Son were dead of the same poison. At first I suspected foul play until I found the letter on the table. She had killed herself and my boy, had meant to kill Shani as well. Punishment for my sins. Shani doesn't deserve any more punishments for my sins. The sin of loving is very twisted for loving in itself is never a sin. I desired my fathers approval a sign of his love so greatly I was willing to ignore every sense of morality in my own heart. I sold my own freedom and future more then once in an effort to gain it. _

_He came to me Harry, I have hid him all this time in my own home ignoring his growing madness agreeing with him in his hate of you. Harry he has tried his hardest to destroy your life, Spelling Fred into madness, spelling you to take advantage of your memories. _

_I'm Ashamed to admit that my efforts to stop him have not been for you Harry. In the beginning I didn't care that he was hurting you, only cared for my own skin, but more importantly my daughters. _

_That's my shame to bear and I know you will likely react with fury to this, that all this time I have known and not warned you. I will not defend my actions, because I would do it all over again, I would give everything away for her. What she needs most right now is truth. The truth of the mater is that how can I rightfully teach her it is always better to do right when I do not do it myself. So there, you now know the cause of your pain and will more then likely arrive within moments after reading this and my father will put up a fight. Lucius has no care for playing fair, he will know it was I who told you and I believe in that moment he will do his best to kill me. I don't plan on letting him succeed but I know that it would be unwise to leave it to chance. _

_Harry I have walked a very lonely road for most of my life, I don't want that for Shani. I beg of you to forgive my sins and look at her with clear eyes. She has never been anything but innocent and has paid far too much for me already. You have right to be angry but please do not take your anger out on her. I have legally named you her guardian, her God Father. All you have to do is sign the papers included in this letter and send it back to the ministry. _

_I have no where else to turn, no one else I trust with the greatest treasure life has given me. There isn't any redemption for me but she is my one reason for living and the one thing I shall miss if I go. Love her as I have loved her and she will bring you more joy then you can imagine._

_Draco._

Harry stood blinking at the letter in shock. The parchment shook in his hands as tremors of absolute rage began to rake his body. Months of fear, loosing Fred, nearly loosing Ginny and the twins, the invasion of his mind and crumbling of his spirit…Draco had known it all.

The parchment crumbled in his fists and fell to the floor.

As they shared meals and, as he had been welcomed into their home Draco had known. Draco had been _hiding _the BASTARD!

He gripped his wand so tight his knuckles were turning white. His ears were roaring so hard he didn't hear the pop of Jane and Seamus appearing before him.

"Hey Harry, where's Ginny? We have some wonderful news" Seamus beamed at him excitedly not noticing the pallor of Harry's skin. Jane however noticed right away.

"uh oh." She breathed. Noticing the balled letter she knelt and picked it up.

"Read it!" Harry managed to hiss. "And don't even try not to convince me not t go over there!"

Jane's eyes scanned the letter and then met his. "I'm not going to. The man needs, and deserves killing. Lucius not Draco that is. Harry you can't possibly be blaming him?"

"Of course I can. Did he or did he not keep Lucius's secret? Harry was so close to screaming with fury he felt near to popping.

"Breath Harry, you're beyond this remember? Just breath." Jane advised him softly.

Harry cringed she was right. Charging in their on his own anger would serve little purpose except getting himself and Draco possibly killed. He had vowed to put his dark side, his feelings of hate and vindication aside. Justice and Vengeance was a fine line to walk and for too long he had been tripping over it.

"Lucius, is his father…" Harry bit out having to bite past distaste to think clearly.

_The sin of loving is very twisted for loving in itself is never a sin. I desired my fathers approval a sign of his love so greatly I was willing to ignore every sense of morality in my own heart. I sold my own freedom and future more then once in an effort to gain it. _Draco's words fluttered to the front of his mind.

"I can understand why he might have hid him in the beginning. And once he found out what he was up to, Lucius would have threatened him with…." He continued and slowly realization dawned.

Lucius would have threatened him with the same thing he had threatened Harry. The lost of his treasure, his heart. His family. _I would do it all over again, I would give everything away for her…_

He could not condone the actions of his longtime rival…

But he understood them.

He knew what he had to do.

(change of scene)

"Yes I was helping Potter and he already knows about you." Draco admitted stonily pushing Shani further behind him. He had sent Harry the owl hours ago, as soon as daylight hit. He should be storming in any minute. Draco had thought to talk with him, convince him to take Shani with him back to the Weasleys before confronting Lucius. That way Shani would have been safe and he and Harry could both come at Lucius.

He didn't know how Lucius suddenly knew he had been helping Harry. This blew his plans sky high and now Shani was in mortal danger. He could feel her trembling behind his body. He would shield her with his last breath if he had to, his mind franticly searched for some way to get her to safety.

"I would run, before he gets here. He's an Auror he's probably got the entire ministry on their way here this very second. Why don't you cut your losses and make an escape now." He tried reason even though he already knew Lucius was beyond reason.

Lucius smirked as if reading his mind. "That's not Potter's style at all, he'll come blazing in here his brashness waving like the fools flag it is. And when he does I'll be ready. You cost me everything Draco. Victory tasted so sweet, so very sweet indeed. You're going to pay now, and pay dearly."

Draco closed his eyes past the fear past the terror that was beginning to freeze his blood. He was about to die. He knew it like he knew he would draw breath in the next second. He knew it because he had to protect his daughter at all costs. Had known it from the beginning.

He reached behind him and gripped his daughters hand.

_I love you so much…_

He squeezed.

(change of scene)

The smell of sulfur as Devon skidded into the room appearing from thin air wasn't what startled Harry. He had sent up the call for his team five minutes ago and since then all seven members had been popping into his living room. It was the fact that Devon had answered that was the surprise.

"Harry chief said you were on medical leave he put Dev in charge until you got back." William Harvings the youngest member of his team blustered.

"it's been temporarily put on hold. I've discovered a red lister." Harry quickly explained. He ignored the glances his eyes centered on Devon. Why had he answered his call?

"Which one Harry?" Corry asked gripping her wand instantly ready for battle.

Harry was about to answer when there were three small pops and three more people crowded his front hall. Except these weren't people. Three house elves looking frightened and frantic hurried towards him.

"Mr. Potter. Mr. Potter you must come quick it's Master Draco his Father has gone mad. Neli fears for her Master sir." One of the house elves a female wearing a bright yellow sundress that looked like it had been made for a doll.

This was met with gasps and gleeful glances, each of them wanting a piece of the infamous death eater.

"We don't have much time. This is to be strictly protocol slow and easy. We go in carefully and we bag him. Understood team." He instructed getting ready to leave even as he spoke.

"Harry…you can't lead this though. You're on medical leave, if even the slightest thing goes wrong even chief won't be able to gloss it over." Harvings stated what all of them were thinking. There was silence as Harry's team, whom had followed him faithfully never questioning his judgment stood in uncertainty.

"Harry's human, he's made some judgment calls that didn't turn out too hot. No different then any other Auror in this unit, in fact far less. He's our captain and I for one choose to follow him."

Harry watched in puzzlement as Devon was the first to leap to his defense. He felt a warm glow expanding in his chest, as Devons eyes begged his forgiveness.

_Nothing to forgive, Devon had been right about him after all. _

One by one they gathered around him waiting for him to lead them once again into battle. Corry smiled her eyes glinting warmly at her husband sharing a comradelier with the men on her team, renewed and strengthened by the danger ahead of them.

"Good to have you back Captain my Captain."

(change of scene)

"VENDEGO"

"CRUCIO"

He and Lucius seemed to move at exactly the same moment. Lucius wand thrust towards Draco his lips curling in malice. Draco however had spun around and aimed at his daughter. Just as a bright blue haze began to surround her a jet of red light was slamming into Draco forcing him to the ground in unbearable pain.

"PAPA!" Shani screamed her voice shrill with fear. He prayed the spell had worked, had formed the shield around her to prevent Lucius from harming her. Buying her time.

"You think to protect her from me! It can not last forever! I will Kill you Draco, but not right away. I will leave just enough of you to watch me drain every last drop of the blood from that pretty little body of hers. " Lucius sneered. "CRUCIO"

Draco bit his tongue so hard in and effort not to scream, that he felt blood gush in his mouth sure that he had bitten straight through it.

"STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT!" Shani was wailing beating at the walls of her blue hazed prison, her only sanctuary until help could come.

As Lucius continued to torture him, as he was christened in his own blood and the sound of his daughters sobs he separated himself from the moment. His mind drifted to a day long ago. _The walls of St Mungo white and glittering the wails of his daughter lighter younger and far more precious. Holding her for the very first time. Looking into eyes such a deep a grey as to be almost silver it rivaled any gem he could name. He didn't need gems, he had two perfect ones in her eyes and he knew that day he had found his greatest treasure. _

Pain biting incredible pain in his gut… he was aware that Lucius was digging something into him. Aware on one level that he was screaming…so many screams…ones of gleeful madness coming from his father…one's of terror from his daughter.

"_HELP!! SOMEBODY HELP!! PLEASE HELP!!!_

It was all fading reality blinking in and out.

"WAS IT WORTH IT DRACO! TELL ME AS YOU FEEL YOUR BLOOD LEAVING YOUR BODY WAS IT WORTH IT!" Lucius screamed spittle flying from his mouth his eyes glazed with fanatical fury.

Draco was drifting.

(Change of Scene)

Harry had no sooner appeared in the living room of Draco's home when he could smell the blood. The sight that greeted him turned his stomach to cold, made his gut clench in fear. Shani knelt in the middle of the room surrounded by a protection charm. Not even a few feet from her Draco lay sprawled on the ground.

Harry could taste the blood it permeated the air, landing on his tongue with a salty musk that made his stomach roll. The sounds of agony coming from the young girl, who had lost her mother now could only watch as she lost her father tore at his insides.

So much pain…so much hatred. For what?

It was over in minutes the rest of the team had Lucius surrounded, he was rabid frothing at the mouth screaming curses. He reared back ready to cast the killing curse at the first person who drew near. Devon finished him even as the AVADA was being formed on his lips. Harry did not feel satisfaction that his long hunted for and hated enemy was now dead. He felt only an overpowering sadness as he knelt at Draco's side.

He was still breathing, but the sound was ugly. It rattled in his chest as if blood clogged his airways as if he was drowning on his own blood. He looked at the fallen body of a man he had always hated and found no satisfaction in his dieing breaths. Only a deep sense of loss. Loss of so many years, so many years wasted. He looked to Devon, eyes pleading.

"We can't move him he'd die in seconds. I think it's too late for healing potions even if we had any." Devon whispered sadly as Corry extracted the charm from around Shani.

"GET AWAY FROM HIM GET AWAY FROM HIM!" Shani screamed at them her eyes frantic, wide with terror. She rushed for Harry as if she would tear him away from her father. Harry easily evaded her, then grabbed her around the middle before she could throw her weeping frame onto her father.

Draco's rattling breaths were growing louder more jarring. They sickened him to the core they made him want to throw back his head in despair at the unfairness of it all. He couldn't do anything to help Draco anymore. But watching him choke on his own blood fighting for air was to much.

"Corry get her out of here. Take her back to Ginny. Winters, Beverly clean up the body and write out a full report. The rest of you know what to do. Devon…stay with me." Harry gave the orders he knew he had to give, knew they were all looking to him to lead. He needed help, he couldn't do it alone had learned from trying so many years to walk a broken road all by himself.

Devon gripped his shoulder nodding, offering his support.

"NO! PAPA! NO! LET GO! PAPA PLEASE! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!" As Corry struggled with Shani, tears streaking down her face to match the heart wrenching sobs of the she dragged from the sight of her fathers broken body.

Harry turned away from the sight and reached down to grip Draco's hand. He would put him to sleep, Draco's wounds would kill him in minutes but in sleep he could at least go peacefully. He deserved so much more but it was all that Harry could give him. No…not all.

"Draco…I'm sorry, I'm sorry I didn't get here sooner. I just wanted you to know I understand. I understand it all…I don't hate you Draco. I signed the papers. I'll take care of her for you Draco." He spoke to the dieing man before him. Draco's eyes were unfocused as if he was floating on some plane Harry couldn't see. Besides the terrible rattling in his chest, he might have simply been day dreaming.

His eyes suddenly focused and caught Harry's.

" l-love her….wo …worth it all…" Draco's voice was garbled and raw, so much so that it took a moment for Harry to make sense of what he said. _love her, worth it all. _ whether he meant that Draco had loved her and that she was worth it all, or whether he was pleading with Harry to lover her, that she was worth it all Harry didn't know.

Perhaps it was both. As Harry nodded and Draco closed his eyes falling into sleep Harry was determined to make it both.

(change of scene)

Since Harry had left so suddenly, since foreign house elves were huddling in her house waiting for news, and since Jane had showed them all Draco's letter things had been curious. George had broken down admitting to trying to ruin Harry, people alternated in between yelling and whispering laughing and crying. News of incredible pain was mixed in with news of Joy. Seamus and Jane were getting married but even they did not feel like celebrating at the moment.

Ginny stood waiting. She didn't mind the wait, it came with the territory. She knew exactly what she had in Harry when she married him. Years of waiting had more then prepared her for the rest of her married life. She would spend a lot of time at this window, waiting with love and hope in her heart. Watching for his return. She had a smile on her face, one that didn't reach her eyes. It was for her son. Rory was playing with a miniature set of flying brooms watching them whiz around his head with glee.

It distracted him but not enough apparently because even as one broom made a few fancy zigg zaggs in the air he looked towards Ginny. "Mum, when's papa getting home? Why did he go so fast?"

Ginny scooped him up ruffling his tangled black curls, breathing in his soft scent. He didn't smell as clean and fresh as she once remembered. That scent that only babies seemed to perfect. Before the dirt and grime of adventures and life could permeate their skin. He smelled of dirt clods and outdoors like any other little boy of nearly six. It was bath time. The new scent nevertheless was no less loved or cherished as the soft powdered one of his toddler years.

"Papa's an Auror, the bad guys never rest it seems. Papa will be home soon and I'm sure he'll be glad to see you. You don't want to greet him with dirt on your face do you?" Ginny urged him with a comforting smile. Rory grinned then grimaced already knowing what was next.

"Ah mum do I have too?" He grumbled clearly wishing he had not called attention to himself.

Ginny hid a grin appearing stern as she pointed towards the door. "Bath time. Go on now."

"Can I bring my brooms with? Please mum please?" He begged edging towards the door as slowly as possible.

"Fine but don't stay forever in there, they're are other children in this house who needs baths too."

She watched him scamper away letting her grin break loose. As she turned back towards the window her grin faded. She counted the minutes.

When Harry finally appeared Corry was walking beside him and to Ginny's surprise he was carrying Shani in his arms. The little girl was limp and pale, she looked so shattered and broken that Ginny knew.

"She's yours now, feel up to raising a Malfoy?" Jane spoke from beside her. Ginny hadn't even heard her come in from the parlor.

"Without Draco Harry would be dead, she's a Potter as far as I'm concerned." Ginny told her determinedly. And it was true. She owed Draco so much, it didn't matter to her what his last name was or what mistakes he had made in his past. She owed him everything, and that beautiful little girl was the best part of him.

"I admire the thought Ginny but just remember. She might not want to be a Potter, you might just have to let her learn what it means to be a Malfoy." Jane's whisper was lost to Ginny as she rushed out to meet her husband on the lawn.

As she took her husband in her arms, welcomed him home after her long wait she knew that finally the biggest threat to their lives was over. As she guided the pale shaken girl into her home, welcoming her into her life she knew a new branch, a new path in their lives was just beginning. She was determined to face it head on just as she face everything in her life with Harry. As she lay in her bed that night held tightly and securely in her husbands arms she could hear the muffled cries of the grief stricken little girl through the walls. Moments latter she heard the pattering footsteps of her son and the creaking of the door to the room Shani was staying in.

A moment more and the crying had ceased. She knew it would not be the last of Shani's tears, but was thankful for her sons open and loving heart. So much like his fathers. Janes words whispered back to her as she drifted off to sleep.

Shani becoming a member of their family might cause incredible joy like the hight of summer or incredible struggle, like the harshest of winters. She was sure of one thing however, she already loved that little girl and love lasted forever. No mater what the season.


	25. Epilouge

EPILOGUE

Shani had been living with the Potters for a year now, her third year at Hogwarts come and gone and in the summer breeze a welcome change from school. Her fathers death had been in every news print from Prophet to the gossip rags. Harry's praise of him had made him out to sound like a hero but the world had not forgotten his role in Albus Dumbledore's death.

He was scene in the best of lights as a poor misguided man who's one redeeming quality was a love for his daughter, instead of the cunning and brave man Shani knew him to be. All year people looked at her. Most of the glances were no longer judgmental and icy. Harry had made sure of that. The whole world knew that Harry Potter had welcomed Malfoy's daughter into his arms like she was his own child.

It baffled her just as much as it did the world. Still they applauded him and pitied her. The general consensuses seemed to be that she should thank her lucky stars that Harry was now her guardian-father of sorts, as if to say that Shani had gained from her fathers death and should be thankful to no longer have to bear up under her fathers stain.

Wasn't she the lucky one.

Harry and Ginny tried hard they really did. They were never cruel to her, were down right nice in fact. She had to grudgingly admit she wasn't making it easy for them. She could really care less what cloths she wore or what food she ate but made out as if touching anything of theirs was beneath her.

Why?

She had no clear answer only that she wanted her father. That he was dead and never coming back. That she no matter what anyone thought she should want did not want to be Harry's daughter!

She hugged her knees to her chest squeezing back tears. She would not cry. What was the use after all. No amount of tears would bring her father back.

She knew they must think her terrible, maybe if she continued to act out they would give up and give her away. Even if she had to go to an orphanage at least there she would not have to pretend to be something she wasn't.

She would never be a Potter…could never be one of these smiling people without stain on their lives. People would always look at the silver and green on her dress robes. The blonde and grey of her coloring and see a Malfoy.

Part of her wanted it, wanted to be seen as her fathers and only her fathers.

The other part of her wanted so badly to truly belong to someone. To be bathed in gold and red.

"Hey SHANI! Aunt Harry and Aunt Ginny are looking for you again! What's your deal? Only Babies throw tantrums like that."

The condescending voice of Frankie Weasley snapped her out of her mood and her distress. To be caught desperate and on the verge of tears by any of them, especially Frankie was too much to bear.

She felt a twinge of guilt knowing how fair, and how hard they were working to make her feel at home. She buried it instantly lashing out. "I'll come when I bloody please _Frances_! Harry is _not _my father!"

The bitter truth of that threatened to break her.

"And why would he ever want to be, you certainly aren't making yourself agreeable. You broke Aunt Ginny's wedding china! If you think you're so bloody high above us why don't you just leave!" Frankie bit out crossing his arms across his chest. Both of them were had just completed third year and Frankie's voice was beginning to regain some of it's level no longer cracking and warbling at every turn.

He was taller then any boy in their year and that tawny hair of his was still streaked with the palest blond when it hit the sun. Veela blood had to explain why her heart pounded funny in her chest whenever he drew near because she hated him otherwise with everything in her.

"Go jump off a bridge Weasley." She sneered sweeping past him with a glacier cool her father would have been proud of.

"You might just drive me to it! Slytherins! Why on earth you're biting the hand that feeds you I'll never know. If I were my aunt and uncle I'd toss you out on your arse, but they seemed determined to like you anyways. Everyone's gone bloody daft around here and you're the daftest of them all." Frankie cursed in frustration.

There were hurried scampering footsteps and as the two squared off glaring at each other, energy fair crackling between them Rory rounded the corner his curls flying his green eyes bright with excitement. Frankie was his favorite cousin had idolized the older boy before meeting Shani. Now Shani was a sister of sorts and seeing the two of them go at each other always left him upset and torn. Shani instantly backed away from Frankie, and Frankie did the same greeting the little boy with a smile.

"You two weren't fighting again were you? Mum made cookies come on Shani, come on Frankie their the best kind." Rory urged them both.

Ginny's chocolate cinnamon cookies were worth a few apologies, the fact that that stubborn fool of a woman was baking her cookies when by rights she should have given Shani a kick in the arse brought a lump to her throat. As she linked hands with the little boy Frankie regrettably doing the same to the boys right they set off back towards home.

Shani was soon laughing at the little boys antics, Frankie's deeper tones mirroring her own amusement. As the summer sun shone brightly above them Shani forgot her worries and simply enjoyed being amongst the Potters. Summer was her favorite season, she loved being lost in a sea of red and gold.

A/N: FINI Well my dears I am finally done. This took me all weekend to plan, write, rewrite because I didn't like the tone or the way that such and such happened. I drove my mum crazy clacking away.

Well As you might have guessed I'm planning on a sequel this one a little more drams centered and it's going to be focused on Rory, Shani and Frankie. Of course the baby twins will make appearances as well as Harry and Ginny after all they are the creators of this little mess. It is going to take place 11 years from when this one ended beyond that I have no idea search for "RED AND GOLD"….sometime soon or later depending on how life and time goes. I have a new baby nephew his names Tony so who knows what life holds in store. Thank you for the many faithful reviews and lovely comments. I have enjoyed reading all of them. Albinto.


End file.
